Vault: Boiling Point At The Gym

Summary

The Bert Show: "Vault: Boiling Point At The Gym" (December 5, 2025)

Host: Bert Show Cast (including Phil, Lorraine)
Episode Theme: Hidden camera "Boiling Point" prank in a gym—How much will an unsuspecting gym-goer tolerate before losing their cool?

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Episode Overview

This episode centers on a hidden microphone prank inspired by MTV’s "Boiling Point," but adapted for the radio format. Phil, a member of the Bert Show team, puts an unsuspecting woman at the gym through an increasingly annoying and competitive treadmill situation to see how long she keeps her cool. Listeners are then challenged to guess the outcome for a prize, combining audience interaction with a dose of cringe-worthy humor.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. "Boiling Point" Segment Background (01:02–02:31)

• Phil introduces the "Boiling Point" concept, explaining the challenge of adapting a visual hidden camera show for radio.
• Recap of a previous segment where Phil tried to put a baby in a tanning bed, with the "boiling point" being the staff threatening to call the police after 7 minutes.

“The quote unquote, the Boiling Point moment was to get her to call the police on me. And sure enough, she threatened to call the police. And that's when she reached that mark at seven minutes.” — Phil (02:25)

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2. Explaining the Gym Treadmill Scenario (03:22–03:53)

• Phil sets up this episode’s "Boiling Point":
  • Only two treadmills available; Phil chooses to run next to an “absolutely gorgeous young lady.”
  • He decides to be “that guy”—the one who tries to race her and even messes with her treadmill settings.

“I reach over and try to speed up her treadmill.” — Phil (03:53)

• He admits that competitive spirit is common in gyms as people peek at each other’s treadmill speed or incline.

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3. Listener Game Mechanics (03:57–04:41)

• Listener Lorraine (“Lolo,” a regular caller) is challenged to guess what happens:
  • 1. Phil falls off the treadmill
  • 2. The woman gets a musclehead to escort him out
  • 3. The woman ignores him and leaves

Lorraine picks option 2: escorted out by a musclehead.

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4. The “Boiling Point” Prank: Treadmill Escalation (05:04–06:57)

Phil’s tactics:

• Phil repeatedly increases his pace, taunts the woman about speed and calories burned, and even tries to shame her into going faster.
• He reaches over and tries to “help” by physically adjusting her treadmill.

Notable Quotes and Banter:

“I’m going faster than you.” — Phil (05:10)
“You could use it. Come on.” — Phil (05:41)
“Dude, I’m really not here to run. I’m just walking…” — Woman on treadmill (06:43)

• Phil keeps pushing her, even joking about her possibly being a smoker, which she denies with some irritation.

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5. The Climax: Phil Falls Off the Treadmill (06:57–07:39)

• As Phil reaches over one last time to increase her speed, he loses his balance and falls.
• Chaos ensues as the microphone is disturbed; he explains that’s what the audience just heard.

“And that, my friends, is me falling on my ass.” — Phil (06:59)

• He then reveals himself to the unsuspecting gym-goer, who is oblivious to the setup but amused.

“I just look at her and I go, I’m Phil from the Virtual. I was recording you. Is that okay? And she’s like, yeah. And I walk out of the gym right there.” — Phil (07:21)

• Lorraine loses the prize, having guessed incorrectly.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Gym Competition:

  “Aren’t you constantly peeking over to see how fast they’re going and what incline they’re at? And then you start to get all competitive in your head…” — Phil (04:00)

• On his fall:

  “I fell right on my elbow. I get up, and the noise you hear is me grabbing the microphone…I have to stop it right there.” — Phil (07:04)

• The gym-goer’s dry response:

  “Dude, I’m really not here to run. I’m just walking.” — Woman on treadmill (06:43)

• Phil’s closing reflection:

  “I’ve always wanted to meet a guy who fell off a treadmill.” — Lorraine (07:39)

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• MTV "Boiling Point" explanation and recap: 01:02–02:31
• This episode’s prank setup (Gym version): 03:22–03:53
• Listener Lorraine joins and game explained: 03:57–04:41
• Treadmill prank escalation: 05:04–06:57
• Phil falls off the treadmill: 06:57–07:39

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Tone and Style

The show is informal, playful, and prank-heavy, focusing on awkward humor and interactions. Phil’s narration is self-deprecating and entertaining, while the rest of the cast and Lorraine add banter and lighthearted teasing. The tone throughout is real, funny, and geared for laughs.

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Summary Takeaway

This episode is a classic Bert Show hidden-mic prank full of gym awkwardness, cringe comedy, and interactive fun with the audience. Most memorable is Phil’s relentless treadmill competition antics culminating in a blundered fall—reminding listeners that sometimes, the prankster ends up being the butt of the joke.

Transcript

[A]

Okay, only 10 more presents to wrap. You're almost at the finish line, but first.

There, the last one.

Enjoy a Coca Cola for a pause that refreshes.

Okay, only 10 more presents to wrap. You're almost at the finish line. But first.

There, the last one.

Enjoy a Coca Cola for a pause that refreshes.

The Bird Show. Phil Turan is in here because he has continued a segment that we absolutely stole right from MTV called Boiling Point. Now, Boiling Point is a new hidden camera show on MTV that puts people in really awkward situations and then kind of has a time clock on the bottom of the screen. And if the person that they have put into this really tough situation loses it before a certain amount of time, they get cash, right? I'll give them $100 cash right then and there. If they don't, if they're nice throughout the entire, they keep their cool. All right, our boiling point is a little bit different. Explain how our boiling point works. We have to kind of do it a little bit different because it. When you have, obviously on tv, you can kind of see the reaction and kind of see them getting frustrated and ticked off. Well, I do the same thing, but I kind of have to edit mine a little bit different because, you know, dead silence of me and, you know, the Boiling Point contestant, if you will, staring at each other doesn't translate very well on radio. That just equals dead air. So last week we did it and I took a. Don't get the premise yet. I was gonna tell you what I did last week. You mean the one before we're gonna roll with right now? Yeah, the one that we did last week. Go ahead. Okay. Last week I took a. Because Melissa wasn't here, took a two year old baby into a tanning bed.

To see if the girl would let me let him tan. And sure enough, after about seven minutes, she said no.

Phil told her that the baby was going on a photo shoot, so he needed to bronze him up a little bit.

So I. Yeah, the quote unquote, the Boiling Point moment was to get her to call the police on me. And sure enough, she threatened to call the police. And that's when she reached that market. Seven minutes. All right. Okay, so we'll find a listener to play this time around. Phil will tell them the scenario that he put one unsuspecting person in, and you'll give three potential outcomes. I'll give you three scenarios. One is true, the other two are false. And if I'm correct here, if you obviously get the true one, then you've Won the collateral. Movie passes. You got it. Hi, Lorraine. Hey, Phil. What's happening, sweetheart? Hey, Lorraine, how are you? Hey, guys. Hi. Good morning. Do you guys know each other? Apparently we do. How's the family? How's the kids? You sound so chummy, Phil. Hey, Phil, it's Lolo. Lolo, yeah. Hey guys. He's a frequent Marshall listener, calls all the time. Hi, Lolo. And you know how this is going to work now?

Brief me again. Go ahead. Okay, Lorraine, what I'm gonna do is I will give you the scenario, which is I'll go ahead and tell you now on this one, I titled this bowling point competitive treadmill guy, where I went into a gym, took my position on a treadmill right next to a. Unfortunately, the only two treadmills available where there was one empty was next to an absolutely gorgeous young lady who was just briskly walking. And I took my position right next to her and I decided to be that guy who wanted to race her.

And at one point, and you'll hear this a couple of times, I reach over and try to speed up her treadmill.

Don't you guys get like this? When you're on a treadmill in a gym and you're next to somebody, aren't you constantly peeking over to see how fast they're going and what incline they're at? And then you start to get all competitive in your head about it. And if they're going at a 5, 6, you gotta be at a 5, 8. People will compete for any. I mean, it doesn't matter what it's going on. You will. You are always competitive. Alright, so the situation is you at gym, woman next to you, she's on a treadmill. Also, she's doing her thing. What are the three possible outcomes? Three possible outcomes of this competitive treadmill guy. I fall off the treadmill, she gets a muscle head, she gets mad at me and goes to get a muscle head who escorts me out of the gym. Or three, she just walks off and ignores me completely. Okay, So I picked number two, the muscle head. She gets frustrated, goes and gets a muscle head and he escorts me off the property. All right, Lorraine. Okay, let's all listen together. How you doing? Good, how are you? Great.

Three, two. Is that how fast you're going? Yeah, I'm up to 3, 7.

I'm going faster than you.

3, 8.

You can go faster if you want to.

3, 9. Let's try and catch up. Really? Okay. Oh, I'm at 4, 4, 2. I'm going a mile faster than you A whole mile. An hour faster. Come on.

Why don't you try and catch up?

You could use it. Come on. Oh, really?

Go to 3. 8. Just get close to me. I'm at 4T. You try to get to 3. See? I've already burned 30 calories. How much have you burned? Really? Not sure. Did you have a big lunch today?

Not really. I'm wondering why you're working out so hard. Are you going to the beach soon? No. It's like you're pushing yourself harder than you should, trying to lose some weight. No. Most people try at the beginning of the summer, not the end. Don't worry about it. The longer you stay on, the more you'll lose. So you probably won't stay on for a while.

You know what will help? You know what will help? If you speed up. I'm really happy with the 3A. Here, I'll help you. Hold on. You push this. You push this right there. That was me. See, you're closer. Don't you feel better already? Are you pushing her now? You're out of breath. Are you a smoker? No. You sound like you are. Oh, my God. I'm still going faster than you, though.

Dude, I'm really not here to run. I'm just walking. So I'm just gonna sit down a little bit. Okay, I've noticed you slowed down, so I'm just gonna speed you up just a little bit. Oh. Oh.

All right.

And that, my friends, is me falling on my ass.

Did you really? So you were reaching over and you lost your footy? I was reaching over to speed hers up, and I lost my balance because the damn treadmill was going so fast. I fell on my ass. And the noise you hear is me getting up. I fell right on my elbow. I get up, and the noise you hear is me grabbing the microphone. I had it propped up on the treadmill, and I'm just like, I have to stop it right there. And I look at her, and granted, this went on for about five minutes. And I just look at her and I go, I'm Phil from the Virtual. I was recording you. Is that okay? And she's like, yeah. And I walk out of the gym right there.

I've always wanted to meet a guy who fell off a treadmill. Sorry, Lorraine, you didn't win. Okay, guys, thank you. Thanks for playing. Bye. Bye. Okay, I've noticed you slowed down, so I'm just gonna speed you up just a little bit. Oh. Oh.

All right.

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