Vault: Can You Match The Celeb To The Random Fact?

Summary

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The Bert Show: "Vault: Can You Match The Celeb To The Random Fact?"

Release Date: March 27, 2026
Cast: Bert, Matthew, Emily, Frank
Main Theme:
The Bert Show crew dives into a playful guessing game, matching celebrities to quirky, often little-known facts. Through fast-paced banter, friendly competition, and spontaneous storytelling, listeners are invited into an entertaining session blending pop culture trivia with authentic, off-the-cuff humor.

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Episode Structure & Highlights

1. Introduction to the Game: Celebrity Random Facts

• Format: The hosts present random celebrity facts, with the group attempting to match the star to their fact.
• “Somebody posted celebrity facts. All right, there are 50 here, but we can't go through all 50, so you guys just tell me when you're bored with the list. Okay." (00:46, Host)

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2. Key Discussion Points & Notable Moments

A. Famous Fingers & Ears

• Matthew Perry’s Finger:
  • Fact: Missing part of his middle finger due to a door accident.
  • "This guy's missing part of his middle finger on his right hand due to a door shutting accident." (00:46, Host)
  • “Matthew Perry.” (01:20, Matthew)
  • Follow-up banter about prosthetic tips and YouTube deep-dives.
• Rob Lowe’s Hearing Loss:
  • Fact: Deaf in his right ear after a childhood virus.
  • "A childhood virus left this person completely deaf in his right ear." (02:02, Host)
  • “Rob Lowe.” (02:11, Host)
  • Jokes about how loud Rob would be at a party.

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B. Childhood Triumphs, Nerves & Talents

• Aspiring Pageant Stars:
  • Justin Timberlake’s pageantry wins as a preteen.
  • “At age 10, this celebrity won 1991 preteen Mr. America pageant.” (02:30, Host)
• Early Stage Fright:
  • Jessica Simpson panicked and exited her Mickey Mouse Club audition after seeing Christina Aguilera.
  • “In 1993, this singer tried out for the Mickey Mouse Club but panicked after watching Christina Aguilera.” (03:34, Host)
  • “Jessica Simpson.” (03:40, Frank)
• Mini-Stand-up Star:
  • Jamie Foxx used as a classroom ‘reward’ for his joke-telling in second grade.
  • "As a second grader, this kid was so talented at telling jokes that his teacher used him as a reward if the class behaved." (03:01, Host)
  • “Jamie Foxx.” (03:23, Host)

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C. Sad or Sweet Childhood Quirks

• Tap Shoed Night Watch:
  • Jim Carrey wore tap shoes to bed as a child to cheer up his parents.
  • "As a child, this actor wore tap shoes to bed just in case his parents needed cheering up in the middle of the night." (04:04, Host)
  • “Jim Carrey.” (04:35, Host)
  • “Aw, tragic.” (04:37, Matthew)

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D. Celebrity Connections & Oddities

• Hollywood Events:
  • Christina Applegate famously dumped Brad Pitt at the 1989 MTV Movie Awards.
  • “This celebrity attended the 1989 MTV Movie Awards with Brad Pitt, but she dumped him at the event and left with somebody else.” (04:42, Host)
  • “If I tell you it’s Christina Applegate.” (05:08, Host)
• Rocket Scientist Roots:
  • Jack Black’s parents both worked on the Hubble telescope.
  • “This actor is the son of rocket scientists. His mother worked on the Hubble telescope.” (05:28, Host)
  • “Jack Black.” (05:44, Host)
• Sasquatch Shoes:
  • Paris Hilton’s size 11 feet lead to shoe line jokes.
  • “This actress, reality TV star, has size 11ft.” (05:52, Host)
  • “Paris Hilton.” (05:57, Frank)
  • “That’s like Sasquatch feet right there.” (06:07, Host)

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E. Odd Lineage and Career Origins

• Madonna’s Distant Ties:
  • Random family relations connect Madonna, Gwen Stefani, and Celine Dion.
  • “This celebrity is related to both Gwen Stefani and Celine Dion.” (06:19, Host)
  • “Madonna.” (06:33, Host)
  • Explanation of the convoluted ancestry.
• Juggling Start:
  • Patrick Dempsey was a unicycle-riding clown before acting.
  • “This actor began his career as a juggling unicycle riding clown.” (07:03, Host)
  • “Patrick Dempsey.” (07:15, Host)
• Celebrity Artistry:
  • Heidi Klum is also an avid painter, featured in US Art magazines.
  • “This model is an avid painter and several of her works have appeared in US Art magazines.” (07:28, Host)
  • “Heidi Klum?” (07:42, Host)

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F. Iconic TV Twins & Local Legends

• Olsen Twins’ Fake Teeth:
  • Child stars wore fake teeth in later seasons to keep their signature smiles.
  • “These twins had to wear fake teeth during the latter years of their show because smiles began to look different.” (07:51, Host)
  • “The Olsen twins.” (07:52, Host)
• Usher’s Lung Power:
  • Star Search: Usher holds record for longest note by a child.
  • “This local celebrity holds the Star Search record for the longest note held by a child at 12.1 seconds.” (07:57, Host)
  • “Usher.” (08:05, Matthew & Host)

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G. Relationship Tidbits & Humble Beginnings

• Dating New Kids:
  • Halle Berry once dated New Kid on the Block’s Danny Wood—dumped for being mistaken as a groupie.
  • “This beautiful celebrity used to date new kid on the block, Danny Wood. And they broke up because the band thought she was a groupie.” (08:21, Host)
  • “Halle Berry.” (08:37, Frank)
• Chicken Suit Days:
  • Brad Pitt’s early career included mascot work for El Pollo Loco, plus Key and Forensics Club stints in high school.
  • “This actor belonged to the Key Club and the Forensics Club in high school. And before he became an actor, he supported himself as a chauffeur, a furniture mover, and a costumed mascot for the restaurant El Pollo Loco.” (09:02, Host)
  • “Brad Pitt?” (09:22, Host)

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Notable Quotes

• “If he was like a Tennessee fan, you know, and he want. The camera's on him. He's like, oh, we're number one. It really wouldn't be. It would be like we're sort of—half a one, but we're halfway there.” —Matthew (01:37)
• “As a child, this actor wore tap shoes to bed just in case his parents needed cheering up in the middle of the night." —Host (04:04)
• “She dumped him at the event and left with somebody else.” —Host, about Christina Applegate and Brad Pitt (04:52)
• “That's like Sasquatch feet right there. That's 11's big.” —Host (06:07)
• “He was a chicken. He was the Pollo Loco chicken.” —Emily & Host (09:26–09:29)

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Timestamps for Significant Segments

| Time | Segment | | -------- | -------------------------------------------------------- | | 00:46 | Game introduction, first fact (Matthew Perry) | | 02:02 | Rob Lowe’s hearing loss | | 02:30 | Justin Timberlake’s childhood pageant | | 03:01 | Jamie Foxx’s stand-up as a second-grader | | 03:34 | Jessica Simpson’s Mickey Mouse Club audition | | 04:04 | Jim Carrey and his tap shoes | | 04:42 | Christina Applegate dumps Brad Pitt | | 05:28 | Jack Black’s rocket scientist parents | | 05:52 | Paris Hilton’s size 11 feet | | 06:19 | Madonna’s family ties to Gwen Stefani & Celine Dion | | 07:03 | Patrick Dempsey started as a juggling clown | | 07:51 | Olsen twins’ fake teeth | | 07:57 | Usher’s Star Search record | | 08:21 | Halle Berry’s “groupie” relationship | | 09:02 | Brad Pitt’s pre-acting jobs, including Pollo Loco mascot |

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Episode Tone & Flow

• Atmosphere:
  Light, rapid-fire, supportive competitiveness, full of laughs and on-the-fly commentary.
• Engagement:
  Hosts riff off each other’s guesses, often riffing into playful side stories and observations.
• Energy:
  High-energy, fast-paced, with a focus on quirky trivia and the cast’s natural chemistry.

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Conclusion

This Bert Show episode is an energetic, trivia-rich showcase of celebrity oddities, childhood stories, and offbeat facts, driven by the cast’s improvised camaraderie. Whether listeners know the stars or not, the group’s banter and creative guesses keep the game entertaining and engaging throughout.

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Transcript

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[Host]

The bird show. You know those Facebook lists now 25 random things you didn't know about me or whatever. And we tried them also here. These are. Somebody posted celebrity facts. All right, there are 50 here, but we can't go through all 50, so you guys just tell me when you're bored with the list. Okay. One for us. What's that? Do we get to guess of who the random fact goes to? I think they're so random. I don't think you'd have a prayer. But we can try it that way. The first one we've talked about on the show, I was going to use that as the example. This guy's missing part of his middle finger on his right hand due to a door shutting accident.

[Matthew]

Matthew Perry.

[Host]

Matthew Perry. Yeah. Yeah.

[Emily]

I couldn't think of. Chandler is what I was.

[Matthew]

And he had a prosthetic. Right on friends.

[Host]

Did he?

[Emily]

Yeah, Jeff told us about that. The prosthetic tip. It's a. It was a tip that he was missing.

[Host]

Right, the whole finger.

[Emily]

Yeah.

[Host]

But like if.

[Emily]

It's hard to say prosthetic.

[Host]

If he was like a Tennessee fan, you know, and he want. He's. The camera's on him. He's like, oh, we're number one. It really wouldn't be. It would be like we're sort of

[Matthew]

half a one, but we're halfway there.

[Emily]

Ball.

[Matthew]

It was like his ring finger or some or middle finger or something. I don't think it was his pointer finger.

[Host]

You can go on like YouTube and you can search it and they have videos up there of him with half a digit.

[Matthew]

I'm just guessing that's a random thing to search. Matthew Perry with half a digit.

[Host]

A childhood virus left this person completely deaf in his right ear.

[Matthew]

Mm.

[Emily]

I have no idea. I Don't have a prayer.

[Host]

Rob Lowe.

[Emily]

Really?

[Host]

Yeah, it's deaf in one ear, huh?

[Matthew]

I bet he'd be fun to get drunk with.

[Host]

Talking real loud.

[Matthew]

See how drunk people get loud.

[Host]

Anyway, he's the guy you sat next to. The big speaker.

[Matthew]

Yeah.

[Host]

At age 10, this celebrity won 1991 preteen Mr. America pageant. And the following year, he became the first male winner of America's Universal Charm Pageant.

[Matthew]

Mario Lopez.

[Host]

Mario Lopez. Justin Timberlake.

[Frank]

I don't know.

[Host]

I don't know. Justin Timberlake.

[Emily]

Yeah, Take that. I won't get another one.

[Host]

I wasn't really sure that this was a competition till now, but this is the vert show.

[Matthew]

Well, then I got Matthew Perry.

[Emily]

Boom.

[Host]

1:1. As a second grader, this kid was so talented at telling jokes that his teacher used him as a reward if the class behaved. This kid got up and would do stand up in the second grade.

[Matthew]

Jack Black.

[Emily]

Hayden Weiss.

[Frank]

Sorry, Random. Jimmy Fallon.

[Host]

Jamie Foxx.

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I was close.

[Frank]

I got the J.

[Emily]

You're right. Wendy tied a quarter of a point.

[Frank]

I'll take it.

[Host]

In 1993, this singer tried out for the Mickey Mouse Club but panicked after watching Christina Aguilera.

[Frank]

Jessica Simpson.

[Emily]

Jesse Simpson. I got it.

[Host]

One each.

[Matthew]

She told us that.

[Host]

She did?

[Matthew]

Yeah.

[Host]

I don't even remember who having the Mickey Mouse Club.

[Matthew]

She's been on with us twice.

[Host]

Oh, yeah. Little blonde thing. Got a sister that's in the business too.

[Matthew]

Don't you remember Music Midtown, our stage. We hung out with her.

[Host]

I remember Ludacris.

[Matthew]

After that, no more.

[Host]

As a child, this actor wore tap shoes to bed just in case his parents needed cheering up in the middle of the night.

[Emily]

Aw, sweet Usher.

[Matthew]

That's tragic, actually.

[Host]

Why do you think tragic?

[Matthew]

Because his parents must have been really sad.

[Host]

I guess he would have to show an example of sad during the day for him to think that if they were bummed.

[Emily]

Yeah.

[Host]

Wow, you really brought me down on that one.

[Matthew]

Hold on, hold on, hold on. I want to have a guess.

[Host]

Sammy Davis Jr. You never get. It's not even a. It's not even a dancer.

[Emily]

I don't know.

[Host]

Jim Carrey.

[Matthew]

Aw, tragic.

[Host]

That's sad.

[Emily]

Makes me sad.

[Host]

This celebrity attended the 1989 MTV Movie Awards with Brad Pitt, but she dumped him at the event and left with somebody else.

[Matthew]

Gwyneth Paltrow?

[Emily]

No, he dated. Oh God, I can't think of her name.

[Host]

89 MTV movie where she said, ah, you're not good enough for me.

[Matthew]

Buh.

[Host]

By you're not good looking enough for me.

[Matthew]

Oh.

[Frank]

Who was that? I don't remember.

[Emily]

What's her name? I don't remember.

[Host]

If I tell you it's Christina Applegate.

[Emily]

Oh, no, that's not who I thought it was. Who was the actress that's in what's Eating? Gilbert Grape. And what's her name?

[Host]

The only. I just remember Leonardo DiCaprio.

[Emily]

Anyway, he did. Yeah, whatever. I can't remember her name.

[Host]

This actor is the son of rocket scientists. His mother worked on the Hubble telescope. Wow. Yeah. This is gonna surprise you. We have interviewed him and he was high.

[Matthew]

Ty Bennington. No. Jack Black.

[Host]

Yeah.

[Emily]

Really? Yeah.

[Host]

Jack Black's parents are rocket scientists.

[Emily]

That's funny.

[Host]

This actress, reality TV star, has size 11ft.

[Frank]

Paris Hilton.

[Host]

Paris Hilton.

[Emily]

Huh?

[Host]

Huh.

[Frank]

Because she's starting her own shoe line.

[Host]

Size 11. That's pretty big, right, For a woman?

[Matthew]

Yeah, that's usually for very, very tall women.

[Host]

That's like Sasquatch feet right there. That's 11's big.

[Frank]

Well, she's what? How tall is she?

[Matthew]

Not that tall.

[Frank]

Like five something.

[Matthew]

She's not six foot, though.

[Emily]

Close.

[Frank]

I don't know.

[Host]

This celebrity is related to both Gwen Stefani and Celine Dion.

[Emily]

Whitney Houston, Julia Roberts, Melissa.

[Host]

You're wrong.

[Matthew]

That is random. Celine Dion and Gwen Stefani.

[Host]

Yep. Who knows Madonna?

[Emily]

Really?

[Host]

Yeah. It's kind of random. Gwen's great aunt's mother in law shares the same last name as Madonna. And an ancestor of Madonna's mother was married to distant relative of Celine's dad.

[Emily]

Wow.

[Host]

So it's. It's not deep. But it is. This actor began his career as a juggling unicycle riding clown.

[Matthew]

A random juggling unicycle.

[Emily]

That's what I would have said. I would have said Jim Carrey on that one.

[Host]

He's on Grey's Anatomy.

[Matthew]

Oh, T.R. knight.

[Host]

Negative.

[Emily]

Patrick Dempsey.

[Host]

Why is that? Because gay people have to start out juggling and have to be clowns.

[Matthew]

The first name that came to my mind, whatever, when he said Grey's Anatomy.

[Emily]

Patrick Dempsey.

[Host]

Yeah. Patrick Dempsey.

[Matthew]

Still hot.

[Host]

This model is an avid painter and several of her works have appeared in US Art magazines.

[Emily]

Brooke Burke.

[Matthew]

Is that Ashley Judd?

[Host]

No.

[Matthew]

I don't know.

[Frank]

Cindy Crawford?

[Host]

Heidi Klum? These twins had to wear fake teeth during the latter years of their show because smiles began to look different.

[Emily]

Olsen's.

[Host]

The Olsen twins. Yep. You guys bored by this yet?

[Emily]

No.

[Host]

This local celebrity holds the Star Search record for the longest note held by a child at 12.1 seconds.

[Matthew]

Usher.

[Host]

Usher, huh?

[Emily]

Yeah.

[Host]

Who's gonna pretend that they haven't been keeping score.

[Matthew]

I don't think we have, really. It's just the brief moment of winning is enough.

[Host]

It's the mini celebrations that make it all worth. I think this one we all did know. This beautiful celebrity used to date new kid on the block, Danny Wood. And they broke up because the band thought she was a groupie.

[Frank]

If you said Halle Berry.

[Host]

Halle Berry. Yes.

[Frank]

That's all I got.

[Emily]

Yeah. Your yummies. There's a short list of your Yummies.

[Host]

Hall of Fame. Yummy. And the last one. This actor belonged to the Key Club and the Forensics Club in high school. And before he became an actor, he supported himself as a chauffeur, a furniture mover, and a costumed mascot for the restaurant El Pollo Loco.

[Emily]

Oh, sad. That is sad.

[Host]

The first part of it is intriguing, though. Key Club and Forensics Club in high school.

[Frank]

But then he dressed up as a chicken.

[Host]

Then he dressed up as a chicken. He's come a long way. Andy Dick.

[Emily]

Oh, I thought you said it was Andy Dick. No, I have no guess.

[Frank]

I don't know.

[Emily]

Whitney Houston?

[Host]

Brad Pitt?

[Frank]

No, really.

[Emily]

He was a chicken.

[Host]

He was the Pollo Loco chicken.

[Emily]

Awesome.

[Host]

Came a long way. The Bird Show.

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