Vault: Did This Listener Come Clean To Her Parents About Her Marriage?

Summary

Podcast Summary: The Bert Show
Episode: Vault: Did This Listener Come Clean To Her Parents About Her Marriage?
Release Date: March 30, 2026

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Episode Overview

This episode of The Bert Show revisits two dramatic listener stories teased on Friday: one, a young woman navigating the fallout after coming clean to her deeply religious parents about secretly eloping; and the other, a high-stakes dance audition that may alter a listener's life trajectory. The cast brings its signature mix of supportive humor, candid questioning, and empathy as they unpack the consequences, motivations, and emotions behind big life choices.

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1. Listener Mary: Confessing Her Secret Marriage

Context and Setup

• [01:27] The hosts remind listeners of Mary’s dilemma: she secretly eloped, but her religious parents were involved in planning a wedding, unaware the marriage had already happened.
• [02:09] Mary joins the call to reveal how her conversation with her parents went.

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Mary's Reveal: How Did Her Parents React?

• [02:27] Mary shares: Her husband’s family is supportive and excited, but her own parents are "not so much." They pulled their financial support for the planned wedding, reallocating the money elsewhere:

  "They have decided not to pay for the wedding at all and put that money towards, I don't know, whatever they've got going on right now." – Mary [02:35]

• Mary and her husband, both young and not financially ready, now have to fund a wedding themselves.

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Details and Motivations

• [03:21] Hosts clarify the timeline: Mary and her now-husband eloped shortly after getting engaged, but were still planning a traditional wedding with her parents involved.
  • Her parents' reaction: They assumed she was pregnant, not married already.

  "They were both shocked. They're adjusting to it. They're okay. They just don't... they're not going to pay for our traditional wedding." – Mary [04:09]

• Mary doesn’t know how they’ll afford a wedding but still wants a celebration.

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Parental Disappointment and Family Dynamics

• Parents saw it as a betrayal, taking the secret personally rather than as a slight against tradition.

  "They took it as it was against them that we did this and kept it a secret." – Mary [05:01]

• Host wonders if her husband receives more blame:

  "Do your parents actually get more or angrier at your husband than they do you?" – Host [04:28]

• Mary insists disappointment is split equally, given her independent history and long-term relationship with her now-husband.

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Why Elope if Still Planning a Wedding?

• [05:48] Listener Sarah calls in to ask why Mary didn't just wait.
• Mary explains:

  "We just didn't want to wait to be married... It was just kind of like a random—well, that's really spontaneous. We didn't want to wait five or six months for our wedding... We want that. We want to be married. We want to be able to just have that bond. And we couldn't wait." – Mary [05:55]

• They preferred not to engage in physical intimacy until married (due to their religious upbringing), which hastened the marriage.
• [06:43] Mary reveals their ages: 21 and 22.

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Host and Listener Reactions

• Co-hosts discuss the urgency of young love and how expectations differ by age.
• Another caller, Jen, emphasizes adult consequences:

  "She doesn't get to whine about not having the money. You made it an adult decision, so you got to kind of go through with all the consequences." – Jen [07:49]

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2. Listener Ashley: The Life-Changing Dance Audition

Background

• [08:32] Ashley calls in post-weekend after auditioning for a dance program, determining whether to pursue dance or pivot to teaching as a career.
• Stakes feel high:

  "I'm auditioning for a dance major. So this kind of is determining what I'm going to do for the rest of my life." – Ashley [08:34]

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Audition Experience

• Ashley recounts the pressure and performance:

  "It turned out to be probably the best audition I've ever done." – Ashley [09:09]

• "I have to wait two weeks" for results, but the solo went well, and a director talked to her for an hour encouraging her.

  "After the audition, one of the directors came up to me and she talked to me for about an hour trying to convince me to stop [and] come to the school." – Ashley [11:53]

• She expresses relief: "I have no regrets... I was proud of myself, actually." – Ashley [10:18]

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Hosts’ Reflections on Dreams, Passion, and Perseverance

• The cast discusses the challenge of knowing when to keep pushing for a passion and when to recognize reality:

  "Some of the most successful people in the world have been told they couldn't do it for a really, really long time." – Co-host [11:09]

  • Famous examples: Michael Jordan, Colonel Sanders, Abraham Lincoln.
• The difference between foolishness and courage in chasing dreams:

  "We judge people who ended up being successful as being this courageous person. And then if we looked at somebody that tried and tried and always failed and never succeeded, then we look at them as foolish." – Co-host [13:13]

• The importance of true passion:

  "If you're able to do that the rest of your life, make a living, but still just be able to do that and pay your bills, then that's your passion." – Co-host [11:39]

• Ashley promises to call back once she gets the final word.

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3. Notable Quotes & Moments

• Independence and Consequence:

  "I've always... really, really, really independent. I moved out when I was 16, and I've lived on my own since then." – Mary [04:39]

• Early Marriage Rationale:

  "We wanted to stay away from each other physically until we got married, and that's really difficult, especially since we've known each other for so long." – Mary [07:00]

• Supportive Listener Input:

  "She doesn't get to whine about not having the money. You made it an adult decision..." – Jen [07:49]

• On Handling Rejection:

  "You can either let it motivate you or you sort of crumble from it." – Host [12:52]

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4. Key Timestamps

• [02:09 – 08:25]: Mary’s marriage confession story and fallout
• [08:32 – 13:41]: Ashley’s dance audition saga, reflections on dreams, and career pivot discussion

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5. Tone & Style

The episode maintains The Bert Show’s trademark mix of honest dialogue, friendly teasing, and empathetic support. Hosts invite real listener perspectives and alternate between constructive critique and encouragement, reflecting authentically on both the pain and joys of growing up and making big life decisions.

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Summary

This episode powerfully explores themes of independence, family expectations, the price of honesty, and the tension between risk-taking and responsibility. Through two poignant listener journeys, The Bert Show’s cast and callers reveal the raw, relatable moments that define adulthood—whether it’s coming clean to your parents or chasing a lifelong dream.

Transcript

[A]

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[B]

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[A]

The bird show on Friday, we asked you guys if you were going into the weekend and it was potentially a life changing weekend. And we took two pretty intriguing calls. One was from Burchill listener that was auditioning for a.

[C]

It's like a majorette type thing.

[A]

Dance dancing.

[C]

Majorette dance thing.

[A]

I don't know what that means, majorette dancing.

[D]

I don't either.

[A]

Okay.

[D]

I just, I think that's what she said.

[A]

It was some kind of audition, musical dance audition. And she said going into the weekend, if she didn't get this one, she was gonna go on a completely different career path. It was just time for her to make like this was her breaking point here.

[D]

A lot of pressure.

[A]

And there was another Birch show listener we have to talk to who has been married but has been lying about it to her parents this entire time. And she was gonna tell her parents this weekend that, yeah, I'm already married. Cause they were all planning the wedding together and stuff.

[C]

They had eloped and the wedding was coming up and for some reason, I mean her, she was saying that her family's deeply religious and that's one of the reasons they would have a problem with it. But I guess that she and her husband didn't want to have to not live as husband and wife. You know, they had to be very conservative and act like they couldn't sleep together and they could, you know, whatever. So I don't know what it this weekend, but for some reason they were going to crack and go ahead and tell them and she was afraid that that would ruin the wedding plans by doing it.

[A]

I was going to do that in a couple of minutes. But actually, Mary's on the phone right now to talk to us about it. And this one is the line about marriage call that we took. Hey, Mary, how are you?

[E]

I'm doing okay. How are y'? All?

[A]

Trying to interpret exactly what might have happened this weekend based on just you saying hi.

[E]

Well, I mean, his family is. His family's good. Like, they're. They're. They're okay with it. Actually, they're. They're pretty excited. Mine, not so much. I mean, they're. They're okay that, you know, of the man that I married, obviously, because we're gonna get married anyway. However, they have decided not to pay for the wedding at all and put that money towards, I don't know, whatever they've got going on right now. This was not. Because I know my parents. This was a. A big deal. And so. Oh, well. But my fiance and I were. Well, husband, I guess, is what you call him now. We're going to have to pay for it ourselves. And obviously, we're. We're young, and I'm not really sure how this is going to work because we do not have the money for a wedding. It wasn't going to be that expensive to begin with, but still a couple thousand dollars and we just don't have it.

[A]

All right, we have to reset this year real quick because there's some details that I'm unclear on. So you guys. You went. You eloped, you got married, and then you were planning this sort of second wedding, and your parents were gonna pay for this.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

And you were gonna try to keep up the whole rouge. That you guys weren't married. So when you told them this weekend, was it like in your living room and you're sitting down and do you say, look, I've got some big news I need to tell you about. Cause they're thinking you're pregnant.

[E]

And they were. They were thinking. Because I told them that it wasn't necessarily really bad, but it wasn't really good either. And so there, you know, because we are young, we're both trying to settle our careers right now and everything. And so that's what they were thinking. They were thinking that I was pregnant. But, I mean, they were both shocked. They're adjusting to it. They're okay.

[F]

It's just.

[E]

They just don't. They're not going to pay for our traditional wedding. And we still want that. You know, we want that celebration with everybody and our friends and family there. We still want that. But I don't really know what to do. At this point, because we're not going to be able to afford to really do much of anything.

[A]

I mean, I'm curious, in a case like this, do your parents actually get more or angrier at your husband than they do you? Because you're the little girl that's not a little girl. But he should know better than that.

[E]

Well, I've always kind of been. I've never been. I've always, you know, make sure all the good stuff, you know, as far as that, I don't drink or do drugs or anything like that. But I am rebellious. I'm really, really, really independent. I moved out when I was 16, and I've lived on my own since then. So they don't really look at me as their, you know, little girl. They haven't in a long time because I did move out a long time ago. So it's about equal, really. And they've known my husband for around six years now. So they're as equally as, you know, I guess, disappointed. They. They just took it as. They took it as a. As it was against them that we did this and kept it a secret. And everybody else is actually pretty excited about it.

[A]

So they took it more personally than anybody else did.

[E]

They did. Yeah.

[C]

I can understand that. I mean, I guess because I'm confused on, if you've already got a wedding planned, why go elope? But, I mean, I could see from their point of view they wanted to experience it for the first time. And it just seemed. I don't know. I don't know. I could see where they're coming from.

[A]

You're the youngest child, aren't you?

[E]

Oh, no, I'm not oldest.

[A]

Here's a basic question I don't think we ever asked. Hey, Sarah. Good morning.

[F]

Hey. I just want to know why she eloped Anyway, if they're still wanting to plan the whole wedding.

[A]

Yeah. Why'd you elope?

[F]

What's the point of that?

[E]

We just didn't want to wait to be married. We actually got married very, very, very soon after we got engaged. Like a week and a half or two weeks. It was just kind of like a random. Well, that's really spontaneous. We didn't want to wait for five months or six months for our wedding to be, you know, complete. And we didn't even know if we were going to be able to plan it. We had planned it for a certain date, but then things kept getting pushed off. They kept getting pushed off. We both work, you know, 50 to 60 hours a week. We were just like, you Know, we don't even know if we're going to be able to pull this thing off. And that was when we had the money my parents were going to give us. And so we're just like, you know what? We want that. We want to be married. We want to be able to just have that bond. And we. We couldn't wait.

[C]

Do you mind my asking how old you guys are?

[E]

I'm 21. He's 22.

[A]

Okay. Why does that make it.

[C]

Well, I. Well, because I wondered if.

[D]

Because love is urgent when you're 21 and 22.

[A]

Cause all you do is wait six months.

[C]

Exactly. And then I wondered if, you know, you wanted to go ahead and have the physical life together and you felt more comfortable doing that.

[E]

Go ahead.

[C]

Going ahead and getting married.

[E]

That as well. That. That was a. That played a part in it, obviously, because our family did raise us in a religious background. Religious manner. And we both, you know, we. We do our devotionals together. We read the Bible together. We actually have this. Not necessarily a marriage counselor, but this woman who is pretty close to his family. And she's just incredible. She's amazing. And so we talk to her every now and then, too, just about what's going on with our lives and this whole situation that we've been going through. And she's just awesome. So we do have that. We wanted to stay away from each other physically until we got married, and that's really difficult, especially since we've known each other for so long. It was just difficult.

[A]

Hey, Kay, go ahead. You're part of the virtual.

[F]

Not trying to whine or not trying

[E]

to be mean about it, but they

[F]

made the decision to elope. She doesn't get to whine about not having the money. And that's just kind of all there is to it. You made it an adult decision, so you got to kind of go through with all the consequences. I understand where her parents are coming from.

[A]

Yeah. You only had to wait six months. I think that's why you're starting to see the tide start to change here a little bit.

[C]

And that's why I held she was. Because I agree with Jen. Everything has to be done now. You know, like, it's more urgent. Yeah, yeah.

[A]

That's why nobody should get married till they're 28. Mary, I appreciate you sharing your story with us, okay?

[E]

Yeah, no problem, guys.

[C]

Good luck and congratulations.

[A]

Yeah, good luck.

[E]

Thanks.

[A]

Bye. Bye. All right. And this was Katie from. No, this is Ashley from Friday Show.

[F]

My mom and I are driving down to Valdosta and I'm auditioning for a dance major. So this kind of is determining what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. I'm pretty nervous now.

[A]

Why is it the rest of your life. I mean, why is it this one audition holds so much?

[F]

If I don't get in, I'm sure, hopefully I will, but if I don't, then I'm going to be an education major. So it just kind of determines which one I'm going to do.

[A]

So. There she is, putting a lot of pressure on herself right there. This is it.

[C]

One audition and out.

[A]

Yeah. Hey, Ashley.

[E]

Hey. How are you guys?

[A]

I'm doing good. How are you today?

[F]

I am wonderful, actually. It turned out to be probably the best audition I've ever done.

[E]

Really?

[F]

Yeah, it was great.

[A]

So did you get the part that you wanted or are you still waiting to find out?

[F]

Well, that's the part I'm not looking forward to. I have to wait two weeks. Okay, find out. So a long wait, but it went really well and I had to do a solo. And I wish Jeff was there because I wanted to tell him I was going to do an interpretive dance, but I didn't have time to set one. So I just thought that was funny with the ribbons and everything. I was gonna.

[C]

Yeah, well, that was my. It's actually mine and Jeff's dance. Okay. Don't get it wrong.

[A]

Don't rob her of that opportunity.

[C]

Don't rob me of my ribbon on a stick.

[F]

That's right.

[E]

I'm sorry.

[A]

Well, here's what I. Here's what I like about this whole story here. Even if. If you don't get the part, what you just told us was it was the best audition that you ever had. So as far as you're concerned, you hit it out of the park. And if you didn't get the part, at least you can say, you know what? It's a sure clear sign that that's not what I'm meant to do.

[F]

Exactly. And I have regrets from it, which is really good.

[D]

You have what?

[F]

I have no regrets. And I'm usually really picky on myself, you know, really critical and everything, so I was. I was. I was proud of myself, actually.

[D]

Couldn't you also say, though, if she felt like she had the best audition of her life, that this is the path she should take regardless of whether she gets this part or not?

[A]

Well, there's a history here, too, right. Where that has led you up to finally saying, look, it's either this way or that. Way.

[F]

I just. I don't know. It's been a long road of a lot of different stuff for me with dance. And, you know, there's been plenty of times where I've wanted to just give it up completely, but this is really my last shot to, you know, study it fully through college and everything.

[A]

So you gave your best, but now you have clarity that some of the best in the industry just told me it's not going to happen. So I guess you can either use that for motivation or you can use it as a sign. Like, I'm just spinning my wheels here.

[E]

Yeah.

[D]

I just think that some of the most successful people in the world have been told they couldn't do it for a really, really long time. You know, you'll hear that from actors and actresses.

[A]

It's at one point, but I think there is some. The line is different with everybody, but I think at one point you have to take a look and just go, that's just not me. It's what I want me to be, but I just don't.

[D]

Well, I don't know.

[C]

Well, I think that the person has to ask themselves the hard question about what they're really passionate about. Because if it's somebody that wants to do it because you get fame and fortune from it, I don't think that's your passion.

[F]

No, no, no.

[C]

I can. I can tell from you. Yeah. I can tell from you that dancing is your passion, you know, because if you would, if you were able to do that the rest of your life, make, you know, make a living, but still just be able to do that and pay your bills, then that's your passion, you know?

[F]

Right. Well, for me, actually, after the audition, one of the directors came up to me and she talked to me for about an hour, trying to convince me to stop, come to the school. So I think there's a chance that I got it. I'm pretty confident in how I did it.

[C]

I really think that's great.

[D]

That is so cool.

[A]

Mimi, you're part of the Burt Show. Hi.

[E]

Hey, guys. I just want to say that, you know, even if she doesn't make it,

[F]

she should still have hope because she's still young. I think she's probably about to start college or going to college. And Michael Jordan was cut from his JD basketball team in high school. So, I mean, what if he would have just let that be the end of his road?

[A]

Yeah, there are a million stories like this.

[D]

You have one, too.

[A]

Yeah. I mean, a general manager at one point told me that, look, this is not for you. You are never going to be the host of a show. This is just not where your talent lies.

[C]

Oh, really?

[A]

You're never going to be good at this. Which I actually agree with. Because I have a show doesn't mean I'm good at it.

[D]

But, you know, had you listened to that and let that knock you down, you wouldn't have the show today.

[A]

Yeah, you can either let it motivate you or you sort of crumble from it. Look, Colonel Sanders, I think, went around the country and he got turned down like 1200 times before somebody gave him some money. I think Abraham Lincoln, like, lost election after local election, and then he lost in the Senate also time and time again, and he kept going. And he's looked upon now in history as one of the best presidents ever.

[C]

And Kenny and I have had this discussion, too, about we judge people who ended up being successful as being this courageous person. And then if we looked at somebody that tried and tried and always failed and never succeeded, then we look at them as foolish.

[A]

I don't know where the line is,

[C]

but the thing is, I think you do have to ask yourself the question, is it really your passion or are you just doing it to imp people?

[A]

Hey, Ashley, will you call us back in a couple of weeks when you know for sure if you got the part or not?

[F]

Absolutely. I definitely will.

[A]

That'd be great. Good luck.

[F]

Thank you so much.

[G]

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