Vault: Do couples really go to Open Houses to have sex?

Summary

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The Bert Show: "Do Couples Really Go to Open Houses to Have Sex?"

Episode Air Date: June 10, 2026
Main Theme:
This episode of The Bert Show dives into the urban legend of "house humping"—couples allegedly using open houses and empty homes for sexual adventures. The hosts gather anecdotes, discuss the phenomenon's appeal, and invite listeners to share real-life experiences, confirming this risqué claim is very much a reality in Atlanta.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Urban Legends on a Local Scale

• [01:15 - 03:11]
  • The show sets up the concept of debunking or verifying local urban legends, "a local Snopes," referencing past rumors (e.g., a hidden town beneath Lake Lanier).
  • The hosts explain their process of tackling these stories with community input.

2. Introducing “House Humping”

• [03:24 - 04:38]
  • The team introduces the rumor that couples sneak into open houses or vacant homes for sex—a practice referred to as “house humping.”
  • The origin comes from a realtor's story about catching a couple in the act during a final home walkthrough.

Quote:
“We're hearing the word house humping thrown around quite a bit.”
— Show Host, [03:24]

3. Listener Stories Confirm the Legend

• [05:49 - 09:48]

  • The show opens phone lines, and self-identified "house humpers" call in to share first-hand accounts.

  • Jay (Caller):

    • Admits he and his wife regularly used their realtor friend’s access to visit and have sex in empty homes.
    • Motivation: The excitement of being in a new environment and the risk of getting caught.
    • Quote:
      “Me and my wife, we have a friend who's a realtor, and she would actually give us the numbers to the dropboxes...check them out, and, you know, one thing leads to another.”
      — Jay, [06:04]

  • Mark (Caller):

    • As a maintenance man for an apartment complex, he and his wife used model and empty apartments for sex before they had children.
    • Quote:
      “Yes, my wife and I...we would go in either the model and crisp and bed, or we would go in, like, the vacant apartment after they were freshly cleaned and everything, and, you know, do the...”
      — Mark, [07:29]

  • Donna (Caller):

    • Shares that, despite owning a home, she and her partner make a hobby of visiting subdivisions during open house days—engaging in sex-athons across multiple houses.
    • Quote:
      “Our hobby is actually during, like, nice days, weekends, we'll go out and house hunt even though we've owned our house for two years. And it just so happens that we'll stumble into the subdivisions...and we'll just hop around to each house.”
      — Donna, [08:22]

  • Ashley (Caller):

    • During her new home’s construction, she and her husband christened all the neighboring vacant houses before the community filled in.
    • Quote:
      “When my husband and I bought our house, we were the first one on the street, and we had sex in all the other houses before everybody moved in.”
      — Ashley, [09:26]

4. The Psychology and Humor of House Humping

• The hosts discuss motivations: thrill of new environments, taboo, and risk.
• Playfulness around naming the activity: “doing the Harry Norman” (a local realty pun)—with the hosts riffing on the idea of “house humping” as a badge of honor or even a competitive hobby, joking about tracking neighborhoods and home prices as achievements.
• Legitimate concern about privacy and what goes unseen in home showings arises, with suggestions like “buy a black light.”

Memorable Exchange:
“You could take a map out and you could tack all the neighborhoods, what counties, and you could do costs...you could do a house that's worth less than 100 grand, a house that's worth between 100 and 150...You could join the quarter million club.”
— Co-host 2, [05:06]

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Notable Quotes & Moments

• Host’s Definition
  “The idea behind house humping...there are real estate agents who will bring their significant others to empty houses...There are landlords who are renting houses who, between tenants will do it. There are people who look at houses who...will go in there and do it.”
  — Co-host 2, [03:36]

• On the Thrill:
  “Just being in a new area and the possibility of getting caught again.”
  — Jay, [06:26]

• Humorous Naming:
  “This should have a name, and it should be called doing the Harry Norman. Like, I'm gonna go give her a Harry Norman.”
  — Co-host 2, [09:06]

• Observational Joke:
  “People are doing it, Literally.”
  — Show Host, [09:38]

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Important Timestamps

• [01:15] — Introduction to “local Snopes” and format
• [03:24] — “House humping” urban legend introduced
• [05:49 – 09:48] — Real-life “house humping” and “apartment humping” stories
• [06:04] — First caller details experience
• [07:21] — Maintenance man’s story (apartment edition)
• [08:22] — Donna shares her “sex-athons” through subdivisions
• [09:26] — Ashley confesses to christening her future neighbors’ houses

---

Summary

The Bert Show takes an unfiltered look at the urban legend of couples sneaking sex in open houses and empty properties, inviting listeners to distinguish fact from fiction. Multiple callers confirm that “house humping” is a real, if quirky, sexual hobby for some—motivated by risk, novelty, and playful adventure. The hosts blend genuine curiosity, surprise, and spirited humor, coining new lexicon like “doing the Harry Norman” while ultimately verifying the legend as true, at least in Atlanta.

For anyone listening (or now reading): if you’re buying a home, maybe bring a black light—just in case.

Transcript

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[Show Host (Birch)]

The Birch show all right, we have a local Snopes to run by you guys this morning. Now, Snopes is a website that is dedicated to either proving or disproving different theories that you might hear.

[Co-host 1]

Urban legends.

[Show Host (Birch)]

Urban legends.

[Co-host 1]

Y You know, like that email about the guy who had the pictures under the seat at the wedding. You know, it's always a friend of a friend of a friend that heard that. Well, Snopes would like actually go in and investigate that and tell you, you know what, that's an urban legend story that's not really real. Or yeah, there's some truth to it and here's where it came from.

[Show Host (Birch)]

So from time to time we'll do a local version and we'll ask any of you guys that might have any information to either call us up and tell us, no, it's totally not true, or yes, it is true. Like in the past, the first and

[Co-host 2]

the biggest one we did was that There's a city at the bottom of Lake Lanier, right? And this happened. We talked about this two summers ago when we were at the height of the drought. Because everybody started to say, the steeple's about to show. You gotta be careful if you're boating on Lanier. Cause you're gonna hit the steeple, the church steeple, with your boat. And so we talked about that. And then people. I mean, people were the most passionate about this one. They were calling up, saying, it is there. And then if you swim down, you can see the cemetery next to the church. You can see it if you swim. If you scuba dive down there, you can see it. And so that. That was the biggest one we've done. But there's just been other random things that come up.

[Show Host (Birch)]

There was a restaurant that the rumor was that they lined up all the girls because it's a restaurant where the waitresses wear really skimpy clothing. And the rumor was that the owner of this establishment lined all the women up and said to them, too fat. You need to take about £6 off. You look okay. You're good. You. You're too fat. So we asked on the air if that was true. And what did we find out? We found out that wasn't true.

[Co-host 1]

Oh, that's what they said.

[Co-host 2]

Depends on who you ask.

[Show Host (Birch)]

That was 50. 50.

[Co-host 2]

That one had the gray areas. But that's the idea that if there's something going on. And the one that we're gonna discuss today could be a national epidemic. But we don't care about anywhere else other than Atlanta.

[Show Host (Birch)]

We're hearing the word house humping thrown around quite a bit.

[Caller Jay/Mark]

Yeah.

[Commercial Announcer]

What is house humping?

[Show Host (Birch)]

Je. I can give the better definition because you're a pro.

[Co-host 2]

The idea behind house humping, and this is somebody who emailed us, and the person who emailed us was a realtor. A realtor. If you listen to the commercials, realtor. And this real estate agent had finished showing a home one weekend and was just doing a final walk through to make sure all the blinds were drawn and the doors were locked, and stumbled across a couple doing it in one of the empty rooms of the house. And so, kind of like, I don't know how they handled it, but, like, that person, they ended up leaving, you know, that couple. And so this real auteur started telling all of their friends about this crazy story. And their other real estate agent friends said, oh, yeah, that's called house humping. And it happens all the time. There's real estate agents who will bring their Significant others to empty houses.

[Caller Donna/Ashley]

They.

[Co-host 2]

There are landlords who are renting houses who, between tenants will do it. There are people who look at houses who, when they think that nobody's around, will go in there and do it.

[Co-host 1]

Like, they just go to like an open house on Sunday from 2 to 5.

[Co-host 2]

Yes, ma'.

[Show Host (Birch)]

Am. And is this something that they do every weekend or is this just.

[Co-host 2]

It's. I don't know if it's. I don't know if it's a one time thrill thing.

[Show Host (Birch)]

I would guess what I've heard is like, it's almost like a fetishy type thing.

[Co-host 1]

Oh, really?

[Show Host (Birch)]

You look up the open houses and. And each weekend you would go to one and yeah, you house hump from. You hump from house to house.

[Co-host 1]

So it's like a hobby.

[Weight Loss Advertiser]

Is it a hobby or like, what's the point?

[Co-host 1]

Well, you could take a map out

[Weight Loss Advertiser]

and you could tack all the neighborhoods,

[Co-host 2]

what counties, and you could do costs.

[Weight Loss Advertiser]

Yeah.

[Co-host 2]

Like, you could do a house that's worth less than 100 grand, a house that's worth between 100 and 150. You could go. You could join the quarter million club. You could do it in a house that's worth more than a quarter million dollars. Booyah.

[Show Host (Birch)]

4741Q100. And I don't think we're looking for the people that just happen to be looking legitimately for a house. And spontaneously this idea came up. I think we're looking at house humping. Means you do this regularly.

[Co-host 1]

Seek it out.

[Co-host 2]

You have to call yourself a house humper.

[Co-host 1]

Hello, I am a house humper. That's what you have to say.

[Co-host 2]

Save that.

[Co-host 1]

Not just the first part.

[Co-host 2]

Just the first part at the beginning.

[Co-host 1]

Dang it.

[Show Host (Birch)]

Good morning, jay. You're on Q100.

[Caller Jay/Mark]

Yes, my name is Jay and I am a house humper.

[Show Host (Birch)]

Hi, Jay. All right, so this is a one time thing, or is this something that you do regularly?

[Caller Jay/Mark]

It's been multiple times. Me and my wife, we have a friend who's a realtor, and she would actually give us the numbers to the dropboxes to get inside the homes, check them out, and, you know, one thing leads to another. I think the kitchen counter. Different, different parts of the home.

[Co-host 2]

What's the thrill of it?

[Caller Jay/Mark]

Just being in a new area and the possibility of getting called again.

[Show Host (Birch)]

I get it.

[Co-host 1]

Okay. I think it's even. I think it's even cooler that it's with his wife.

[Show Host (Birch)]

Yeah.

[Co-host 1]

How long have you guys been married?

[Caller Jay/Mark]

About three years now.

[Show Host (Birch)]

Oh, okay. Boy, I Can't wait to talk to you guys in another 15 years.

[Co-host 1]

And are these in, like, empty houses or are these furnished houses?

[Caller Jay/Mark]

No, absolutely empty. Completely.

[Show Host (Birch)]

Oh, really?

[Co-host 1]

Okay.

[Show Host (Birch)]

I thought these were, like, the demo houses or something. So they'd already be.

[Caller Jay/Mark]

That would actually kind of like, freak me out, like, invading privacy as well. I guess we're still invading privacy, but, like, you know, doing it on somebody else's bed.

[Co-host 2]

See, that'd be my concern. If I ever put my place up for sale. You know, when people. When you show it, it's still furnished. So I would be concerned that, you know, people would be giving me reason to buy a black light.

[Show Host (Birch)]

It doesn't necessarily have to be house humping. It can be apartment humping. Hey, Mark. Good morning. You're on the voice disguise.

[Caller Jay/Mark]

Wow, man, nice segue. Yeah. My name is Mark, and I am an apartment humper.

[Co-host 1]

Hi, Mark.

[Caller Jay/Mark]

Yes, my wife and I have been married. Well, I don't want to give too much away, but when we first got married and we didn't have kids, we. You know, I work for an apartment complex. I'm the maintenance guy. And we would go in either the model and Chris and bed, or we would go in, like, the vacant apartment after they were freshly cleaned and everything, and, you know, do the.

[Show Host (Birch)]

Do I got you.

[Co-host 1]

I love it. And again, a husband and his wife.

[Show Host (Birch)]

I like the model apartment things because if you ever go into a model apartment or a model house, the furniture is awesome.

[Co-host 1]

It's decorated nicely.

[Show Host (Birch)]

It's, like, really, really soft.

[Co-host 1]

Pretend that you're living there.

[Show Host (Birch)]

Here is Donna. She wants to be on the voice disguiser. Hi, Donna.

[Caller Donna/Ashley]

Hi.

[Show Host (Birch)]

Hi.

[Caller Donna/Ashley]

Voice disguiser, right?

[Show Host (Birch)]

Yes.

[Caller Donna/Ashley]

Okay. It's weird because our hobby is actually during, like, nice days, weekends, we'll go out and house hunt even though we've owned our house for two years. And it just so happens that we'll stumble into the subdivisions where there's nobody there. The houses are all open, you know, 10, 20, 30 houses, whatever. And we'll just hop around to each house.

[Show Host (Birch)]

Really?

[Co-host 2]

Wow, that's good stamina.

[Caller Donna/Ashley]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Co-host 1]

And we didn't admit it at the beginning of the call, though. I know.

[Caller Jay/Mark]

No.

[Show Host (Birch)]

And what's the thrill of it? The thrill of it for you is what?

[Caller Donna/Ashley]

New environment? Who knows? I mean, I don't know. It just started one time. I don't even know why we go and look at houses. Because we own a house.

[Co-host 1]

That's awesome.

[Show Host (Birch)]

So it's just for new environment.

[Co-host 2]

I think this should be. This should have a name, and it should be called doing the Harry Norman.

[Co-host 1]

Oh, my God.

[Show Host (Birch)]

We're just doing Harry Norman.

[Co-host 2]

And that's what it's called. Like, I'm gonna go give her a Harry Norman.

[Co-host 1]

Oh, my God.

[Co-host 2]

What?

[Show Host (Birch)]

Hey, Ashley.

[Co-host 1]

Good morning or finding remax.

[Show Host (Birch)]

Hi.

[Caller Donna/Ashley]

When my husband and I bought our house, we were the first one on the street, and we had sex in all the other houses before everybody moved in.

[Co-host 1]

Oh, my God.

[Show Host (Birch)]

So this is legit. House humping is absolutely legit.

[Co-host 1]

People are doing it.

[Show Host (Birch)]

People are doing it, Literally.

[Co-host 1]

And now she can look at all of her neighbors and go, yep. Been in your bedroom, laundry room.

[Co-host 2]

Been in your kitchen.

[Co-host 1]

Your kitchen.

[Show Host (Birch)]

Yeah.

[Co-host 2]

You know, where you're cutting your vegetables. I gave her the Harry Norman right there. Hey.

[Show Host (Birch)]

The Birch Show.

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