Jack (2:27)

Hey. How's it going?

Bert (2:28)

Okay, you're on the voice disguiser.

Jack (2:30)

Outstanding.

Bert (2:31)

Okay, so where do we start? Where was this weekend?

Jack (2:36)

I'd actually rather not say because it's not really in a town or a place that's known for bachelorette parties.

Bert (2:42)

Okay.

Jack (2:43)

And to do so would really sort of reveal a lot about what went on.

Bert (2:48)

Okay.

Jack (2:48)

From what I can tell.

Bert (2:49)

Why don't you give us the details that you can then?

Jack (2:52)

Yeah. So the fiance went off to her bachelorette party this week, and my assignment was to gather other photos of us to hand out at the reception. We're doing this thing over the hearth of the place. We had picked out, you know, pictures of us going back to when we first met. And, you know, all well and good. Problem was, you know, I was going through an online photo sharing website, basically looking for pictures, and I come across this album labeled my fiance's bachelorette party. And there's totally a picture of her with a male entertainer who's totally nude. She's got her hand right on this junk.

Co-host 1 (3:36)

Eek.

Jack (3:36)

Yeah. It doesn't look like anything sexual is happening. Obviously the guy was a professional, but I just don't know what to do or what to feel about it because I don't know if this is normal or not. Is this like what women do on these weekends? All these parties? So she was touching it hand fully, flesh to flesh.

Co-host 1 (4:04)

Bert, I want to ask more questions about the picture.

Bert (4:08)

Me too. I think we need more details.

Co-host 1 (4:11)

Like, was it like her hand or was it like other things?

Jack (4:14)

I mean, it was her hand and it looked like she was laughing, you know, as you would.

Co-host 2 (4:18)

Wow, that's not fair to the guy.

Jack (4:20)

Other. Other girls and other pictures in the same album doing the same thing.

Co-host 3 (4:24)

So all the girls were doing it?

Jack (4:25)

Yeah, all the girls were doing it.

Co-host 2 (4:26)

Everyone's doing it.

Bert (4:27)

Okay, so he's. He's naked and she's got. She's got her hand on his.

Energy Trust of Oregon Advertiser (4:33)

I thought there was no touching at those places.

Co-host 1 (4:35)

I know. I thought so too. And why would you want to?

Bert (4:37)

We've done this dozens of times before where we ask our bachelorette parties more wild than bachelor parties or bachelor parties more wild than bachelorette parties, and we always get calls from people saying it's not even close. Bachelorette parties are way more crazy.

Co-host 1 (4:50)

No, it depends on the group.

Bert (4:51)

It doesn't depend on general rule. I think bachelorette parties are crazier.

Co-host 1 (4:56)

I don't know about that.

Bert (4:57)

Parties. You guys just keep secrets better than we do.

Co-host 2 (4:59)

As far as that thing, I totally agree.

Co-host 3 (5:02)

All men do are out in bars and out in public and being silly. And what guys do is behind closed, creepy.

Bert (5:09)

I don't think that's true.

Co-host 2 (5:10)

Keep in mind guys exaggerate. When you hear a story about a woman's bachelorette party, it's downplayed. When you hear a story about a guy's bachelor party, it's played up.

Co-host 1 (5:19)

Yeah, but the ones that you've told us in the past about food and things like that, women don't do that.

Co-host 2 (5:24)

Well, this woman does. His fiance that he loves very much.

Co-host 3 (5:28)

Well, it sounded like, I mean, everybody in the group was touching. I've never been a part of a bachelorette party where touching was allowed. But they touched. And everybody's laughing while they're doing it and taking pictures. So nothing sexual was going on between them.

Caller 1 (5:42)

But.

Bert (5:42)

Well, let's revert. Okay, so let's say she's looking through and she's finding pictures. And at his bachelor party, he's got his hands or a hand on some strippers.

Jack (5:53)

Ooh. Ha.

Bert (5:55)

And how are you gonna. I mean, how is she gonna handle that?

Co-host 3 (5:59)

I mean, if the picture where he's laughing while he's doing it and then all the other guys are doing. I mean, I see why you're upset. Is it worth calling off the wedding for?

Bert (6:08)

Is that what you're thinking?

Jack (6:09)

No. I mean, it's not. Not anything like that. It's more like when she come home tonight and we talk about the pictures that I'm looking for. Do I even bring it up?

Co-host 1 (6:21)

Yeah, I think you bring it up.

Co-host 3 (6:23)

I definitely think you bring it up.

Jack (6:25)

I'm just so conflicted about this.

Bert (6:26)

Yeah, it's not like there's anything for you to hide here. You didn't break into a Facebook. You didn't break into anything. There.

Jack (6:33)

The pictures are at her request. I was going around to her friends, you know, shared photo albums just to get good pictures of us.

Co-host 2 (6:41)

Why don't you just print out that picture and put it up at your reception?

Jack (6:46)

Because I went back this morning just to double check and see how I felt about it, but now it's password protected.

Co-host 2 (6:53)

Awesome. Somebody remembered.

Bert (6:55)

So were there?

Co-host 3 (6:57)

Yeah. Got stuck.

Co-host 2 (6:58)

Cause here's what happened. You said that you were going to her friends accounts to look these up.

Jack (7:01)

Yeah.

Co-host 2 (7:02)

So here's what happened? She was sitting around last night, you know, hanging out by the pool or beach or wherever they were, and she goes, yeah, blah, blah, blah. And you know what? I got him working this weekend, and he's going through all yalls photo albums to find cute pictures to put us. Isn't he a great guy? And somebody went, he's going through where?

Jack (7:15)

What?

Co-host 3 (7:16)

More than likely it was. Somebody said, oh, I just posted those pictures. And somebody said, you did what?

Co-host 2 (7:20)

Right.

Co-host 3 (7:21)

That's probably how the conversation went.

Bert (7:22)

Hey, Alicia. Good morning. You're part of the Burt Show.

Caller 2 (7:25)

Hey.

Jack (7:25)

Hey.

Caller 2 (7:26)

I wanted to tell this guy he has nothing to worry about because we had a stripper come to my house for my bachelorette party, and he put our hands on him. Like, I know they say no touching, but he had every single girl touching him. So maybe she didn't want to, but he forced her cue. And of course she's laughing because it's

Bert (7:46)

fun, but does she look like in the picture that she's trying to pull away, or is she pretty lucid?

Jack (7:53)

I mean, pretty lucid, but, you know, you can only tell so much from a photo like that.

Caller 2 (7:57)

I said, no problem.

Co-host 2 (7:58)

Was he pretty lucid?

Co-host 1 (8:01)

My question is, what are you most upset about? That this incident happened or that she didn't tell you about it, or that she's now password protected it? Like, which part of it is the most upsetting to you?

Jack (8:12)

Well, you know, to be honest, you know, we haven't really had a chance to talk about her weekend. She's been so. She's been so busy, you know, I haven't even really had a chance to, you know, kind of hear how things went.

Co-host 1 (8:21)

So when she comes home and you say, how did it go? If she tells you, and if she's honest about it and says I was in this really awkward position, blah, blah,

Co-host 2 (8:29)

blah, that's gonna be a hard conversation.

Co-host 1 (8:32)

You know, we were drinking a lot,

Jack (8:34)

and that'll be fine because, you know, I know, I know. These performers don't. They don't do anything, you know, it's not. I don't know what the regulations are on what he can and cannot do, but.

Co-host 1 (8:44)

So you'll be fine if she confesses to you. But if she doesn't confess, are you going to be mad?

Jack (8:49)

See, I probably will be.

Co-host 2 (8:51)

Well, stay calm. Don't let it get.

Jack (8:52)

Our pictures are password projecting. She knows what my assignment was this weekend.

Co-host 2 (8:56)

Don't let her get a rise out of you. Just stay calm.

Co-host 3 (8:58)

Are you writing this down over there?

Co-host 2 (9:02)

Hey, leave me alone. I'M having a ball.

Co-host 3 (9:06)

Be sure and tip your waiters.

Bert (9:08)

Serious.

Co-host 3 (9:10)

I will say, though, the fact that she's laughing in the picture lends to it being more of this group screaming, ha ha. You know, like more innocent than if she was not laughing in the picture.

Bert (9:22)

Good morning, Ty. You are part of the Birch show. Hi.

Caller 2 (9:25)

I don't think that he should be mad at her because the bachelorette party. And if she. Why would she come home and tell him, like, what she did? I mean, if he said something to her, from what he saw, I understand that. But he shouldn't be mad because she doesn't come home in detail what happened at her bachelor.

Bert (9:41)

So let me ask you this then, Ty. So if she walks in the door and he says, so tell me about the bachelorette party and she doesn't volunteer this information, are you saying that he has cause to be concerned there or it's not a big deal?

Caller 2 (9:53)

No, I'm saying he shouldn't be upset because it's her bachelorette party and you wouldn't normally give details. Like it should be an understanding. Like it's. That's fun. She would probably maybe say, yeah, we had a strip or whatever, but she's not going to give details of what happened. And if she doesn't, that doesn't mean that she's being shady. And if he says, this is what I found out and she lies, that's one thing.

Co-host 1 (10:14)

So, Jack, two questions for you. Did you oppose this bachelorette party before it happened? And the second one is, are you having a bachelor party?

Jack (10:22)

To your first question. Yes. We went on a golf weekend, just my buddies and I weren't any strippers. 2. I knew she was going on the special party. I have absolutely no, no problem with it whatsoever.

Co-host 1 (10:34)

Okay.

Jack (10:36)

Nor do I. I really don't have a problem with. With there being a male stripper. I couldn't care. I just, you know, I certainly didn't expect to see her hand on his. On his package. And that's a little disturbing.

Co-host 1 (10:47)

Yeah.

Jack (10:49)

And then to find the account, I just want to make sure I'm not overreacting, that I'm not underreacting, you know, just when I see you tonight, because, you know, I love this girl with all my heart and I can't wait to get married to her.

Co-host 3 (11:01)

Just get some antibacterial soap.

Co-host 2 (11:05)

Did anyone. When you were. When you were golfing, did you let anyone else hold your balls?

Jack (11:09)

Yeah. Yeah.

Bert (11:11)

Come on. I mean, serious.

Jack (11:13)

Wash those balls.

Bert (11:15)

Come on. You're better than that.

Jack (11:17)

I think it's awesome.

Bert (11:18)

Hey, Jennifer.

Co-host 3 (11:19)

You need to eat Wendy. Solid food, Wendy.

Co-host 2 (11:25)

Yeah, you know what? Have it grilled cheese and then tell me.

Bert (11:30)

Good morning, Jennifer, you're on Q100.

Jack (11:31)

Hi.

Caller 2 (11:32)

I think this is kind of a violation. I'm married. I've been married for three years. I could never go to a bachelorette party and touch another guy like that. She's still with him. At some point, that's gotta be considered form of cheating.

Bert (11:46)

Don't y' all think that's over the line? I mean, she had her hand on his back. It's flesh on flesh.

Co-host 1 (11:50)

It's definitely over the line. But sometimes the bachelor and bachelorette parties do that. I mean, I don't think he should call off the wedding because of it.

Co-host 2 (11:57)

I don't even think he's talking about that.

Co-host 3 (11:59)

He's, he's. He wants to know how to handle it when she gets home. And I think that there's no problem with you saying anything.

Co-host 1 (12:05)

Tell her.

Co-host 3 (12:05)

Yeah, because you're bothered by it. So talk about it, you know, and see exactly what happens.

Bert (12:09)

Is this a character type thing? Like, if she doesn't tell you that what happened will you sort of say, are you saying to yourself, I didn't realize that I was marrying a woman that was capable of doing that?

Jack (12:22)

Yeah, I don't know. We've always put honesty, so it's so central to our relationship that she'll probably just come out and say, oh, yeah, you know, we got a stripper and it was no big deal.

Co-host 3 (12:34)

How long have y' all been together?

Jack (12:36)

A little over a year before we got engaged.

Bert (12:38)

Okay, so what's the game plan tonight? You're just gonna let her come in the door, you'll ask her, and then you'll see what kind of information she gives you?

Jack (12:45)

I mean, I think so. I think I'm just gonna let her see where it goes. Then I might just say, oh, did you guys get a stripper? It wasn't fun, ha ha, kind of thing. Because it seems to be the consensus from, from, from everyone out there.

Bert (12:56)

Okay. I think that there are going to be some. If we check back with you tomorrow and she doesn't volunteer the information, are still going to say it's not a big violation. But there are others like that last caller, I think are going to say it's a huge violation.

Co-host 3 (13:08)

It's bothersome for sure, but I don't know if it's big enough to not get married.

Bert (13:12)

I think it's just one of those. For me, it's like it's don't ask, don't tell. Yeah, I just want to believe the innocent. I don't want to believe what happened.

Co-host 1 (13:20)

Yeah, sometimes you don't want to know,

Bert (13:21)

you don't want to ask him. All right, chick, let's check back with you tomorrow and find out exactly how it all worked out, okay?

Jack (13:27)

Okay.

Co-host 3 (13:27)

And you are gonna scrub those hands like a doctor does before surgery.

Co-host 2 (13:32)

You know what? I. I'm guessing that dudes dude is more impressive than stripper because he's so cool about it.

Bert (13:44)

You mean?

Co-host 3 (13:44)

Yeah. Raise a bit.

Bert (13:45)

Confident.

Co-host 2 (13:46)

Yeah.

Co-host 1 (13:47)

More size.

Co-host 2 (13:48)

Jackson's Johnson's better than stripper's.

Bert (13:50)

Gotcha, gotcha, gotcha, gotcha. I think I get it. The Birch Show.

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Caller 1 (14:24)

I sold my car in Carvana last night.

Co-host 3 (14:26)

Well, that's cool.

Caller 1 (14:27)

No, you don't understand. It went perfectly. Real offer down to the penny. They're picking it up tomorrow. Nothing went wrong.

Bert (14:33)

So what's the problem?

Caller 1 (14:35)

That is the problem. Nothing in my life goes as smoothly. I'm waiting for the catch.

Bert (14:38)

Maybe there's no catch.

Caller 1 (14:40)

That's exactly what a catch would want me to think.

Jack (14:42)

Wow.

Carvana Advertiser (14:43)

You need to relax.

Caller 1 (14:44)

I need a knock on wood. Do we have wood? Is this table wood?

Bert (14:46)

I think it's laminate.

Caller 1 (14:47)

Okay. Yeah, that's good. That's close enough.

Carvana Advertiser (14:49)

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Co-host 1 (14:54)

Mom, can you tell me a story?

Carvana Advertiser (14:56)

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Bert (14:59)

Was she brave?

Carvana Advertiser (15:00)

She was tired mostly. But she went to Carvana.com and found a great car at a great price. No secret treasure map required.

Bert (15:06)

Did you have to fight a dragon? Nope.

Carvana Advertiser (15:08)

She bought it 100% online. From her bed, actually.

Bert (15:11)

Was it scary?

Carvana Advertiser (15:12)

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Bert (15:15)

Did the car have a sunroof?

Carvana Advertiser (15:16)

It did, actually.

Jack (15:17)

Okay, good story.

Carvana Advertiser (15:18)

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