Vault: Her Friends Set Her Up On A Date, But Did It Go Well?

Summary

The Bert Show – Episode Summary

Episode Title: Vault: Her Friends Set Her Up On A Date, But Did It Go Well?
Date: April 2, 2026
Main Theme:
The episode dives into the drama of a stealthy dating setup. Lori’s friends orchestrate a “chance” encounter to engineer a date with a guy she’s been crushing on for a year. The hosts and audience dissect what happened, explore feelings about friend group relationships, and debate the ethics and outcomes of orchestrated dates.

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Key Discussion Points and Insights

1. The Orchestrated Set-Up (00:05 – 01:12)

• Lori’s Backstory:
  Lori shares that she has had a crush on a guy in her friend group for about a year. Her friend decides to step in and sets up a fake group hang on a patio, arranging for everyone to cancel last minute, leaving just Lori and the guy.

  • “If you’re not gonna make the move, I’m just gonna set you up.” – Lori (00:07)

• Host Reactions:

  • The cast is skeptical about the plan’s chance of success due to over-complication and likelihood of leaks.
  • “Too many people involved. Like, if you ever throw a surprise party, you have to tell as few people as possible.” – Host (A) (00:36)

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2. The Date – And The Letdown (01:12 – 02:12)

• Execution:
  Lori and the guy arrive, realize no one else is coming, and feign confusion by texting others.

• The Outcome:
  The guy abruptly tells Lori that he’s heading out to meet his brother-in-law at the Cheetah (a strip club), pays his tab, and leaves.

  • “He just stops for a minute and he goes, you know, I don’t know about you, but my brother in law is in town and I’m going, him and I are going over the Cheetah tonight, so have a good night.” – Lori (01:51)

• Hosts’ Reactions:

  • Immediate “Oh no” and speculation that the guy simply doesn’t share the romantic interest.
  • “Apparently the feelings are not mutual…” – Host (A) (02:08)

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3. Processing the Rejection (02:12 – 03:14)

• Lori’s Feelings Post-Date:

  • She expresses disappointment and frustration at being left alone and wonders about his character.
    • “What a jerk. Like, who goes? First of all, like, leaves a girl sitting on the patio. Second of all, like, the Cheetah. Oh, my God.” – Lori (02:12)

• Host Support and Perspective:

  • The cast debates whether the guy’s actions were rude or simply honest.
  • They also point out that as non-boyfriend, he didn’t owe her anything more.
    • “You can’t judge him for going to the Cheetah. Like, he’s not your boyfriend right now.” – Host (A) (02:38)
    • “She has a crush on him; that’s why she cares.” – Host (D) (02:48)

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4. Listener Call-in & Broader Debate (03:52 – 05:02)

• Callers Weigh In:

  • Susan: Pushes back on Lori’s “jerk” label and criticizes the ruse. Suggests the guy’s friends likely warned him about the setup.
    • “You cannot call that guy a jerk when you tricked him into going on a date with you.” – Susan (03:58)
  • Cast and callers debate whether orchestrating such a scenario is inappropriate or simply a way to test mutual interest.
  • The possibility that the guy found out about the plan in advance is considered.

• Silver Linings:

  • Hosts acknowledge at least Lori got clarity on the guy’s feelings without direct rejection.
    • “Helped you figure out the answer without being embarrassed by it.” – Host (E) (03:16)

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5. Rejection, Friendship, and Moving On (04:21 – 07:00)

• Platonic Friendships Post-Rejection:

  • Discussion on whether Lori and the guy can remain in the friend group without awkwardness.
    • “Now how do you guys start hanging out again just as platonic friends, when now you think he’s a jerk?” – Host (B) (04:39)

• Debate on Motives and Methods:

  • Some hosts and callers argue that if the interest was mutual, the guy would have made a move by now.
    • “If I were a guy and I were interested in a girl, I would have made a move already.” – Caller Mary (06:22)
  • Others point out that some men hesitate or wait for more obvious signals.

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6. The "Cheetah" Factor and Double Standards (05:22 – 06:03)

• Strip Club Debate:
  • Hosts challenge Lori’s perception of the strip club as a deal-breaker.
  • Lori clarifies she’d be okay with it, but the sting was being left for another plan.
    • “I mean, if I knew that they, like, cared about me… I'd be okay with it.” – Lori (05:31)
    • “So it's not the strip club. It's the fact that he doesn't like her.” – Host (E) (05:57)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “If you’re not gonna make the move, I’m just gonna set you up.” – Lori (00:07)
• “We gave this one about a 15% chance of working going into the weekend.” – Host (B) (01:07)
• “I don't want him to be my boyfriend anyway. Now.” – Lori (02:53)
• “Oh, we're always testing you, Jeff. That's just what women do.” – Host (E) (03:41)
• “You cannot call that guy a jerk when you tricked him into going on a date with you.” – Susan, caller (03:58)
• “Which is worse: a guy that is, you know, claiming to be your friend, and all he's doing is waiting till you get drunk enough for him to sleep with you. I mean, the rest test in the waters all the time.” – Host (D) (06:51)

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Key Takeaways

• Group interventions in romance can get messy. Too many people in on a plan means a higher risk of leaks and awkwardness.
• Direct communication might still be better. Even though Lori didn’t have to ask him out directly, the awkward orchestration led to confusion and hurt feelings.
• Rejection stings—but at least brings clarity. Lori didn’t get the answer she wanted, but she got closure without a face-to-face rejection.
• “Testing the waters” is common, but not always comfortable. Both hosts and callers agree that mutual interest is often apparent, but sometimes people need a nudge.
• The aftermath is tricky. The friend group dynamic may be a bit awkward, but most agree Lori can move past it now that she knows where things stand.

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Timestamps for Important Segments

• Lori explains the set-up: 00:05 – 01:12
• Hosts discuss the risks of orchestrated dates: 00:31 – 00:56
• The date actually happens — and implodes: 01:14 – 02:12
• Dissecting the rejection and feelings: 02:12 – 03:14
• Caller reactions and ethical debates: 03:52 – 05:02
• Friendship after failed romance: 05:02 – 07:00

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This episode captures the messiness of mixing friendship and romance, the risks of indirect moves, and the honesty of group discussions when things don’t go according to plan.

Transcript

[A]

The Birch Show.

[B]

This is Lori from Friday show telling us about her first date that she had lined up.

[C]

I was hanging out with this group of friends. There's been this guy hanging out for like, I guess about a year. And ever since I've had a total crush on him. So one of my girlfriends was like, listen, if you're not gonna make the move, I'm just gonna set you up. Basically, she's invited us all to hang out on a patio this weekend. What she decided to do was have everybody cancel except for me and this guy. And then I'm supposed to make something happen.

[B]

We were nervous about this one going in. Just too many because of some plan.

[A]

Yeah. Too many people involved. Like, if you ever throw in a surprise party, you have to tell as few people as possible. So once everybody knows, and that's kind of what this was, it's a surprise for him.

[B]

And there's.

[D]

You had to get his guy friends to bail without telling him they're bailing.

[A]

Right.

[B]

And then if they are bailing. Yeah. Someone's gonna say why eventually, you know, the reason why we took off, man.

[D]

Yeah.

[B]

Lori wants to hook up with you. Did you get some? Here's Laurie back on the voice disguiser. Hey, Lori.

[C]

Hello.

[B]

Hi.

[D]

Hi.

[C]

Hi. How you doing?

[B]

Good.

[D]

Good.

[B]

We gave this one about a 15% chance of working going into the weekend.

[D]

Too many obstacles.

[B]

It worked.

[C]

Well, yeah, I mean, everyone. I mean, it worked as planned. Like, we showed up, just us two, and we were like, I wonder where everybody is.

[B]

So you're sitting there and he's sitting there and nobody else is there. And then you start. You put the face on.

[C]

Yeah. I was like, oh, I wonder, you know, where they could be. And he starts texting and I start texting. He's like, you know, he looks up and he's like, oh, you know, everybody canceled. And I was like, oh, you know, you know, oh, no, what are we gonna do? And he just stops for a minute and he goes, you know, I don't know about you, but my brother in law is in town and I'm going, him and I are going over the cheetah tonight, so have a good night. Like, pays for his drink, gets up and leaves.

[B]

Oh, no.

[A]

So apparently the feelings are not mutual.

[C]

And he, you know, I'm like, don't answer that. What a jerk. Like, who goes? First of all, like, leaves a girl sitting on the patio. Second of all, like, the cheetah. Oh, my God.

[B]

Well, he just. He either just sees you as a friend or a periphery. Friend, even.

[A]

Yeah, you're a friend. You're hanging out, and then he's like, oh, cool. Everybody bailed. So he's like. He probably figures why you want to hang out with him. Why does he want to hang out with you? Bye. Bye. And you can't judge him for going to the Cheetah. Like, he's not your boyfriend right now, so you can't be like, oh, what a jerk. He left me for the Cheetah. Who cares?

[D]

She has a crush on him. That's why she cares.

[B]

Anyway, now say that one more time.

[C]

I don't want him to be my boyfriend anyway. Now, why?

[B]

Because he went to the Cheetah.

[C]

Yeah. He seems like a jerk now just

[E]

because he doesn't want to hang out.

[D]

Just trying to save face. So he showed you that he wasn't as interested in you as you are in him, so you got to move on, right?

[C]

Yeah, I guess so.

[E]

But I guess the silver lining is he didn't, like, have to say face or embarrass yourself afterwards by asking him out or whatever. It was kind of like a perchance situation. Helped you figure out the answer without being embarrassed by it. Because he doesn't know that that was planned.

[C]

I guess it was a good test.

[B]

I mean, if he was interested in you and you guys were running in the same group anyway, you'd have known that by now.

[A]

You can't test a guy you don't know. Like, you can't. I mean, it's not. You can't.

[E]

Oh, we're always testing you, Jeff. That's just what women do.

[B]

What do you mean by that? Is that a test? Is that a test by you telling us that you always test this? Is that a test?

[E]

It is.

[B]

Hey, Susan. Good morning. You're on Q100.

[F]

Good morning. How are you guys?

[B]

Good. How are you?

[C]

Good.

[F]

Yeah. That is totally not fair. You cannot call that guy a jerk when you tricked him into going on a date with you.

[A]

And he's gonna find out, too. He's totally gonna find out.

[F]

No, I think his friends already told him. That's probably why he said he was going to the Cheetah Club. His friend probably text him.

[D]

Oh.

[E]

Oh. Cause they were te.

[C]

Oh.

[E]

Because he was texting to say, like, plans are canceled. So I bet you one of his guy friends sent him a text that

[D]

she set it up regardless if he was interested in her, that none of that would have mattered. You know, I don't fault her at all for setting this up to see if he liked her without Like Jen said, having to ask him out. So, I mean, it just. She got the answer she wanted.

[B]

Yeah, he's just got an answer.

[E]

The one she wanted. Yeah.

[B]

So you're. You're not planning on pursuing this guy anymore? You guys. So here's the tough part. Now, like, now how do you guys start hanging out again just as platonic friends, when now you think he's a jerk?

[C]

I don't know. I mean, what if he did get a text that said, like, you know, she's trying to date you, like, stay away or something? I don't know.

[B]

It's inconsequent.

[C]

Weird, you know, make it weird.

[D]

It doesn't. It doesn't matter. I mean, it doesn't matter because you didn't do anything definitive and now you know he's not interested in you. So I think it's much easier to be able to stay in the friend group and not have any awkwardness than it would have been if she asked him out.

[B]

Maybe. You know, either way, it's.

[D]

You think he's a jerk because he rejected you. That's why not because the Cheetah.

[E]

Would you have a problem if anybody you dated went to his trip club?

[C]

I mean, they're not dating. If I knew that they, like, cared about me and, you know, it's just with the guys and it was just like for work or for, you know, something funny, I'd be okay with it.

[E]

So it's not a deal breaker for you if he was interested in you?

[C]

I guess not.

[A]

We're not even having an affair.

[E]

No, but it is because she's saying that he's a jerk. I was trying to figure out, is he a jerk because he doesn't like her, or is he a jerk because he went to the strip club because

[D]

he doesn't like her?

[E]

And she's saying that if it was a guy she liked and he went to a strip club, that's okay. So it's not the strip club. It's the fact that he doesn't like her.

[D]

Yeah.

[B]

Okay, so I don't think there's anything else there. Hey, Mary. Good Morning. You're on Q100.

[F]

Yeah, I think that it's. It's incredibly inappropriate what she did. I mean, they've been hanging out for a year. This guy would have asked her out already.

[C]

He.

[F]

I mean, this. This is like. I absolutely falter. I. If I were a guy and I were interested in a girl, I would have made a move already.

[C]

This.

[F]

This would have happened before.

[D]

Well, I mean, you assume all guys are going to make moves on all girls they're interested in. We've also heard guys talk about how they stay friends with girls until that moment where. Yeah. So I really don't fault her for doing what she did. She was just testing the waters.

[B]

We could wait years. Years and years and years.

[D]

I mean, which is worse.

[F]

Yeah.

[D]

A guy that is, you know, claiming to be your friend, and all he's doing is waiting till you get drunk enough for him to sleep with you. I mean, the rest test in the waters all the time.

[B]

All right, Brittany. At least you have closure. He's not interested in you, Lori. At me. I said Brittany. But that's the next color that was lined up.

[D]

And it's not our fault. So she's mad at us.

[B]

Know, she sort of have an attitude about it this morning.

[D]

I got it. I got it, Bert. I got it.

[B]

We understand.

[A]

Sorry we got to let you go, Laurie. We're all going to the Cheetah. The Burt Show.