Vault: Her roommate might be a hooker Part 3

Summary

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The Bert Show: "Vault: Her Roommate Might Be a Hooker Part 3"

Date: August 11, 2026
Cast: Bert, Kristin, Abby, Cassie, Tommy & others
Featured Guest: Renee (via voice disguiser)

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Episode Overview

This episode continues the saga of Renee, a listener who suspects her roommate of being a sex worker. The conversation explores Renee’s investigation into her roommate’s activities, the evidence she found, her resulting decisions, and the show hosts’ varied opinions on the situation. The tone is candid and humorous, but also raises questions about safety, friendship, and boundaries.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Recap: Renee’s Suspicions and Evidence Gathered

• Renee originally contacted the show after noticing suspicious behavior: frequent male visitors, a discovered hotel key, and other oddities.
• With the help of a friend, she installed a nanny cam aimed at the front door to monitor the comings and goings.
• Over several days, she recorded two different men visiting per day, some repeat, but mostly new faces.
  • Quote (Renee, 02:52):
    “On like Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday, there were at least every single day two guys coming to the house.”
• Renee and her friends further snooped in her roommate’s room, finding an “industrial sized box of condoms.”
  • Quote (Renee, 04:28):
    “I didn’t even know that you could get a box this big. I’ve never seen anything like it.”
• This evidence made Renee uncomfortable and confirmed her suspicions for her friends as well.

2. Renee’s Decision: Leaving Without Confrontation

• Renee moved out, returning to Atlanta without confronting her roommate. She told her she’d left for Memorial Day, but had no intention to return.
• Her parents supported her choice and offered to cover her share of rent for the coming months.
  • Quote (Renee, 05:08):
    “I just, I don’t even … it’s her life or whatever. But … I also don’t want to be living in a house where there’s, like, you know, random guys because it’s kind of dangerous.”
• She remains unsure about collecting her belongings, considering having friends retrieve them to avoid an uncomfortable meeting.

3. The Hosts: Should Renee Have Confronted Her Friend?

• Hosts and callers debate if avoidance was the right call.
• Some feel Renee owed her friend an honest conversation, especially given their “best friend” status.
  • Quote (Caller [Virtue], 07:45):
    “How can she claim to be her best friend, but not have genuine concern and ask her about it?”
• Bert reflects on the boundaries of friendship:
  • Quote (Bert, 08:13):
    “Maybe we all have different definitions for best friends, but there are very few people in my life that I would consider a best friend. And those are the people that I should be able to say just about anything to.”
• Renee is conflicted; she feels uncomfortable about spying and realizes her friend clearly wanted to keep things private.

4. Audience Theories & Humor

• Callers offer alternate explanations: maybe Renee’s roommate is just highly sexually active (a “nymphomaniac”) rather than a sex worker.
  • Quote (Sarah, Caller, 06:33):
    “Maybe she’s just like a nymphomaniac or she just likes to have a lot of sex. I mean, did you see money exchange hands?”
• The hosts joke about creating a “Nympho or Hooker” guessing game—a classic moment of irreverent Bert Show humor.
  • Quote (Co-host 1, 06:55):
    “Let’s play a game next hour called nympho or hook.”
  • Quote (Co-host 3, 06:57):
    “Nympho likes it, Hooker needs it. The money.”

5. Safety and Boundaries

• There’s consensus across the cast that Renee’s primary concern for safety is valid—regardless of the roommate’s exact motivations.
  • Quote (Co-host 1, 06:44):
    “Regardless, it’s not a safe place for her to be. I mean, nympho or not nympho or hooker ... I don’t think I’d want a room with either one.”

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Memorable Quotes and Moments

• Confrontation Aversion:
  “I also don’t want to, you know, be living in a house where there’s, like, you know, random guys because it’s kind of dangerous.” — Renee (05:08)
• Friendship Boundaries:
  “There are very few people in my life that I would consider a best friend ... Those are the people that I should be able to say just about anything to.” — Bert (08:13)
• Playful Banter:
  “Let’s play a game next hour called nympho or hook.” — Co-host 1 (06:55) “Nympho likes it, Hooker needs it. The money.” — Co-host 3 (06:57)
• Judgment vs. Empathy:
  “She never lied to you. Like, she told you she was working in sales ... she just didn’t tell you that she was selling her boobies.” — Co-host 3 (08:54)

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Notable Timestamps

• 01:30 - Segment resumes with Bert introducing the update and Renee’s recap
• 02:52 - Renee describes the video evidence: multiple men visiting daily
• 04:28 - Industrial-sized condom box found during snooping
• 05:08 - Renee explains why she left (safety, discomfort)
• 06:33 - Callers weigh in with alternate theories and opinions
• 06:55-07:01 - Hosts joke about “Nympho or Hooker”
• 07:45 - Caller questions Renee’s claim to friendship
• 08:13 - Bert discusses what it means to be a real friend

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Takeaways

• This episode blends humor with real questions about boundaries, safety, privacy, and the limits of friendship.
• Renee chooses to avoid confrontation, prioritizing her sense of security over an honest conversation.
• The hosts and callers display The Bert Show's signature mix of playful irreverence and genuine debate about personal drama.
• Whether or not listeners agree with Renee’s actions, the scenario offers ample food for thought about what we owe our roommates—and our friends.

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Transcript

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[Bert]

the Bird show all right, let's get back to Renee here. She called us last week and she didn't have definitive proof, but she was starting to feel like her roommate was a prostitute.

[Co-host 1]

Yeah, she had gotten some hints from a next door neighbor who said there was lots of guys coming in and out of the house. She'd found a hotel key and she just there was a bunch of other like little tiny things that were suspicious behavior. So she set up the nanny cam in the living room and posed it right at the front door so that she could see who was coming and going.

[Bert]

Now what? Excuse me. The thing is that she had somebody come over and and install it for her. And there were some suggestions that we put it in the bedroom or they put it in the bedroom. But then that got creepy. Really all you need is the evidence of who's coming in and who's coming

[Co-host 1]

out because she needed a way to approach her roommate about it. She wanted to be able to say, listen, there's guys coming out of here all the time. What's going on? But if she didn't have proof, you, she didn't feel like she could start that conversation with her, which is going

[Bert]

to be a difficult conversation. I would almost pray that if I'm her that I don't find anything out because I have no idea how I'd start that conversation.

[Co-host 2]

Are you a hooker?

[Bert]

Here is Renee back on the voice disguiser. Hey, Renee.

[Renee]

Hi.

[Co-host 3]

Hi.

[Renee]

So I'm actually calling you guys from Atlanta today.

[Bert]

Okay.

[Renee]

I basically, I moved back here because I, you know, I put up the nanny cam with my guy friends put it up for me, and we watched it. And on like Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday, there were at least every single day two guys coming to the house.

[Co-host 1]

Two different guys each and every time.

[Renee]

Yeah, there was one guy that was like a repeat that, like, you know, he came more than once. Like, but like, yeah, for the most part, they were different guys.

[Co-host 1]

And where was your apartment before if it wasn't in Atlanta?

[Bert]

Yeah, you said you're in Atlanta now.

[Renee]

Well, I didn't want to say because I don't want people to know.

[Co-host 2]

Was it in metro Atlanta?

[Co-host 3]

No. Remember, she was from Atlanta and she and her friend is from Atlanta, and now they're living in another city together or they were living in another city together.

[Co-host 2]

Okay, so you were away. Okay, gotcha.

[Bert]

I don't remember any of that.

[Renee]

I moved there after I just graduated college in December.

[Co-host 2]

Okay.

[Renee]

And she'd been living there for a few years. And anyway, so after watching like, so then, you know, my guy friends were like, they really wanted to see it, so we watched it together. And they were like, freaking out. They're like, this is like, she's definitely, definitely a prostitute. So she wasn't, you know, in the apartment. And so we snooped around in her room and we found like an industrial sized box of condoms.

[Caller]

Wow.

[Bert]

Really?

[Renee]

I didn't even know that you could get a box this big. I've never seen anything like it. And, you know, it just totally freaked me out. I mean, there'd be no reason, you know, to have that. All you got. It was like, totally shady, these guys coming over. And so I actually just told her on Friday that I was, you know, going to Atlanta for Memorial Day. And I'm not. I'm not gonna go back. So my parents were really, you know, they don't want me to go back. And they were really cool about it. And so they're actually gonna give me money to give her for rent for the next few months.

[Co-host 3]

So you never had to confront her on it? You just disappeared?

[Renee]

Yeah, I just, I don't even, you know, it's like, you know, I guess, you know, like, it's her life or whatever. But, you know, she obviously doesn't want me to know. But I also don't want to, you know, be living in a house where there's, like, you know, random guys because it's kind of dangerous. Like, what if I were home, like that time that that happened or.

[Co-host 2]

Oh, yeah, of course. Absolutely.

[Renee]

So. And if she doesn't feel comfortable telling me, I mean, obviously she doesn't want me to know.

[Bert]

1 877-588-BERT. Bert, if you want in, what about your stuff?

[Renee]

Yeah, I'm not really sure about that. Like, I think I might have one of my guy friends, like, go over and pack it up for me.

[Bert]

Well, technically, in her eyes. In her eyes, you haven't done anything wrong. Really. I mean, you bail, but you're paying for a couple of months rent, so there's no reason why you shouldn't feel comfortable going in there and just getting

[Co-host 3]

your stuff, you know, how.

[Co-host 2]

But she don't want to confront her. She don't want to have to have the conversation.

[Co-host 3]

Why are you leaving? Their best friend, why are you leaving? We have so much fun.

[Renee]

She's going to be telling her that I put up with Nate.

[Co-host 2]

I mean, well, she's going to call you anyway.

[Renee]

She's so honest with me. But I don't feel very good about the whole spying thing.

[Co-host 2]

Well, what are you going to say when she starts calling you, texting you? I mean, y' all are best friends.

[Bert]

She didn't have to say anything at all. I just wanted to go back.

[Co-host 2]

Thank you do.

[Bert]

Hey, Sarah, good morning. You're on the Bert Show.

[Caller]

Hey, I was just wondering, maybe she's just like a nymphomaniac or she just likes to have a lot of sex. I mean, did you see money exchange hands?

[Renee]

Oh, no, I didn't.

[Co-host 1]

Regardless, it's not a safe place for her to be. I mean, nympho or not nympho or hooker. I mean, really, it's a toss up,

[Co-host 2]

but I don't think I want a

[Co-host 1]

room with either one.

[Bert]

Let's play a game next hour called nympho or hook.

[Co-host 3]

Nympho likes it, Hooker needs it. The money.

[Bert]

Here's Jennifer. Good morning. You're on the Burt Show.

[Caller]

Good morning. Love you guys. This woman's like listening to paint dry. I can't stand talking, listening to her at all. What if she just has different friends over? Who doesn't have male friends?

[Co-host 3]

Three of them a day or whatever.

[Co-host 1]

Two or three different ones.

[Caller]

Two or three. Maybe she doesn't Know her friend. Friends.

[Bert]

I don't know, it seems a little.

[Co-host 2]

I love how everybody's attacking her. Like, God, did you just get over it? What's wrong with you?

[Co-host 3]

She's only selling her va j for more.

[Co-host 2]

Get over it, stupid.

[Co-host 3]

Yeah, you're just upset because you can't make any money off your vajayjay.

[Co-host 2]

You're just jealous.

[Co-host 3]

Yeah, nobody will pay for your love.

[Bert]

Good morning, virtue.

[Caller]

Hey. I just want to say, how can she claim to be her best friend, but I have genuine concern and ask her about it?

[Bert]

That is a little. Yeah, I mean, if this is really your best friend, how come you can't sit her down and say, what the

[Co-host 2]

hell are you doing?

[Bert]

Yeah, and I'm worried about you and blah, blah, blah.

[Renee]

You really think maybe I should go and get my stuff and kind of have. And talk to her about it and just tell her that I set up some nanny cam and everything?

[Bert]

Maybe I'll have different definitions for best friends, but there are very few people in my life that I would consider a best friend. And those are the people that I should be able to say just about anything to. And if I do risk that in the relationship, then at least I know that I did everything I could to protect my friend. There's got to be a way that you can. You can say it to her without completely alienating her.

[Co-host 2]

Because if.

[Renee]

Yeah, I'd like to talk to her. It's just that, like, it's also obvious that it's not as if she was honest with me and told me about it. I also feel like, well, obviously she really didn't want me to know about it.

[Co-host 1]

Or she thinks she's really good at hiding it.

[Renee]

Yeah.

[Bert]

Yeah.

[Co-host 3]

Either way, I mean, technically, she never lied to you. Like, she told you she was working in sales, right? She just didn't tell you that she was selling her boobies.

[Co-host 2]

But what she said. Yeah, but her best friend, she put her at risk with all those guys coming over to their place. You know, they're nice guys.

[Co-host 3]

We heard from the hobby dude earlier that they get. They get a ghost call to the employer.

[Co-host 1]

Background check.

[Co-host 3]

Hey, what's up, employer?

[Renee]

Creepy with that.

[Co-host 3]

This is a ghost call. Do you think he would make a good hooker user?

[Co-host 1]

Get it?

[Co-host 3]

The bird show.