Vault: He's Going for His Friend's Mom and She Is Mortified - Update

Summary

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The Bert Show – "Vault: He's Going for His Friend's Mom and She Is Mortified - Update"

Original Air Date: April 6, 2026

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Episode Overview

This episode revisits and updates a listener drama involving Ellie and her complicated feelings for a close friend who plans to ask out his best friend's mom. The situation turns even messier when Ellie admits to sabotaging her friend's decision by covertly texting his friend from his own phone, sparking debates among the Bert Show cast and callers about jealousy, boundaries, and friendship loyalty.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Recap of the Original Situation

• Summary: Ellie previously called the show to seek advice about her friend, who wanted to ask his best friend's mom out on a date. She was troubled by this, unsure if she should intervene or let him make his own decisions.
• Primary Concern: Ellie worried this might ruin their friendship and that her own feelings for the friend might be clouding her judgment ([01:11]).

2. Ellie's Feelings and Motivation

• Cast Analysis: The Bert Show hosts tease that Ellie's objections might be based on jealousy, joking that she's "already marked her territory" ([02:07]).
• Ellie's Response: "Of course, I still have feelings ... I care about, and ... I don't think he should do something stupid. But ... I don't know that I ... I'm carrying a torch for him still." ([03:42])
• Hosts’ Take: Cast members generally agree Ellie’s reactions seem fueled by more than just friendly concern ([04:22]).

3. The Dinner & The Drastic Move

• Ellie’s Confession: After her friend refuses to listen to her concerns during dinner and storms off to the bathroom, Ellie grabs his phone and texts his friend: "Hey, dude, would it be cool if I asked your mom out?" ([05:04])
  • Quote: "His cell phone. And I sent his friend a text. And just a really quick, hey, dude, would it be cool if I asked your mom out?" – Ellie ([05:04])
• Immediate Reaction: The hosts are aghast, repeatedly exclaiming, "No, you didn't!" and "Are you being serious?" ([05:12])

4. Aftermath and Ellie's Rationalization

• Ellie’s Justification: "I wanted his friend to call him back and be pissed at him, and I wanted him to understand." ([05:24])
• Host’s Critique:
  • “That's on him. That's not on you.” ([05:30])
  • “Before we move on, you understand that was wrong, right?” ([05:32])
• Ellie's Regret: "I don't think I did the right thing." ([05:38])
• Status Post-Dinner: She has not heard from her friend since; suspects he figured out what she did ([05:58]).

5. Listener and Cast Reactions

• Listener Call-In (Joseph): "That's like middle school, high school stuff, isn't it? ... just need to let your friend do whatever he's doing." ([07:43])
• Another Caller (tc): "First of all, she is dead wrong. Second of all, she knows she still has feelings for the dude. ... He's totally cock blocking." ([08:02])
• Host’s Summation:
  • “By trying to save your friend's friendship with his best friend, you ruined your friendship with him.” ([06:36])
  • “She probably ruined everything.” ([06:42])
  • “She loves him. And she was trying to sabotage all that and it worked.” ([08:56])

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Ellie Admits Her Feelings:
  “Of course, I still have feelings from ... I care about ... I don't think he should do something stupid. But ... I don't know that I ... I'm carrying a torch for him still.” – Ellie ([03:42])

• The Sabotage Text:
  “His cell phone. And I sent his friend a text. And just a really quick, hey, dude, would it be cool if I asked your mom out?” – Ellie ([05:04])

• Cast Reaction:
  “No, you didn't.” – Multiple hosts ([05:12])
  “That's on him. That's not on you.” – Host ([05:30])

• Listener’s Blunt Call-Out:
  “That's like middle school, high school stuff, isn't it?” – Joseph ([07:43])
  “First of all, she is dead wrong.” – tc ([08:02])

• Host’s Sarcasm:
  “She should have changed his Facebook status while she was in there.” – Host ([09:07])

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Important Segment Timestamps

• [01:11] – Recap of Ellie's original dilemma
• [02:07] – Hosts joke about marking territory; Ellie's feelings examined
• [03:42] – Ellie discusses her feelings openly
• [05:04] – Ellie confesses to texting from her friend’s phone
• [06:36] – Hosts summarize the fallout
• [07:43] – Listener calls in, gives outsider's perspective
• [08:02] – Second listener "tc" gives a blunt assessment
• [09:07] – Hosts finish with jokes and final thoughts

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Episode Tone & Takeaways

• The tone throughout is playful, sarcastic, and teasing, but also honest about boundary issues and the costs of meddling.
• The cast and listeners largely agree that Ellie's behavior, while coming from a place of concern (and possibly jealousy), crossed a line and damaged her friendship.
• The episode ends with laughter, critique, and a collective shake of the head at Ellie's impulsive move—underscoring the message that sometimes, stepping back is the best choice in a friend's drama.

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Transcript

[A]

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[B]

If you remember Ellie, Ellie called us up for the why do we want to talk to you on Monday segment. And here's a quick recap of Ellie's appearance on the Burt Show.

[C]

This friend of mine saw him the other night and he was telling me about this woman that he met and he's crazy about her. And one of his friends from school, it's. His mom is single and available, but that doesn't make it right. He hasn't told his friend that he's crazy about his mom. He's totally flirted with the mom, the mom flirting back a little, and he's thinking of asking her out. And it's like a train wreck about to happen. I don't know what to do.

[B]

So we did ask her. I think Jen had one good question, poignant question for her.

[D]

What?

[E]

I had.

[B]

What?

[E]

No, I'm just kidding.

[C]

Yeah.

[E]

Well, because she had dated the guy, right? So a long time ago, she and the guy had dated then. He was the one that was gonna ask out his best friend's mom. So I think that she still had feelings for the guy. And I think she was even more freaked out that it Was weird because she still wanted him and didn't want him to be with the mom.

[B]

So

[E]

she's like, already peed on him, and so she was mad that somebody. That somebody else was gonna have him. You know what I'm saying?

[B]

She had already marked her territory.

[E]

Territory, Right. Exactly.

[B]

Hey, Ellie, welcome back to the bird show.

[D]

Well, we don't know that, Jen. We don't know what they did. We don't know what they like.

[B]

It depends on how. It depends on how close they were.

[D]

Yes.

[B]

Ellie, welcome to the bird show.

[C]

Thank you.

[B]

How are you?

[C]

I'm good. Thanks for having me back.

[B]

No problem. Thank you for agreeing to join us. So bring us up to speed. How did the weekend pan out for you?

[C]

Well, you know, I listened to what you guys had to say. I didn't necessarily agree with everything, and I ended up going to dinner with my friend on Friday night, and I just decided to let him know how I felt. I thought that was the first embarrassing to do.

[D]

Okay.

[C]

And he absolutely refused to, like, take a moment and back down from asking his friend's mom out immediately. Right.

[B]

Okay.

[C]

Understand why I thought that was a bad idea. He couldn't understand why I felt like maybe he should tell his friend first. Like, I just could not make how this, you know, could ruin his friendship. He just didn't think it was going to be a problem. He didn't want to have anything to do with what I was saying.

[B]

Did you feel any. I guess. Did it strike a nerve at all when Jen pointed out that maybe you were a little bit jealous? Like, did that maybe. Was that in the back of your mind at all?

[C]

No, I thought about it after she said it, and honestly, of course, I still have feelings from. I care about, and. Which is why I think. I don't think he should do something stupid. But I don't. I don't know that I. I'm carrying a torch for him still.

[D]

Has he dated anybody? I mean, has he dated anybody seriously, between you and now?

[C]

Not seriously, but he's dated other girls and I've known about it and, you know, it didn't bother me. I've kind of seen other people, too. It's just, you know, you care about someone and you don't want to see them do something stupid. And this friend is a good friend of his. And, you know. You know, guys don't think. They don't think things through.

[E]

Yeah, I can see what you're. I can see what you're saying. I mean, if you really don't carry a torch for him anymore. And you're just afraid he's going to screw up his friendship. I get that. But he said he wasn't even going to be willing to talk to his best friend before asking out the mom.

[C]

No, he actually kind of got really mad at me that I would even continue to talk about it, and he stormed off to the bathroom. And then I did something.

[D]

What did you do? What did you do?

[C]

Well, he left his phone.

[E]

Oh, no, no.

[C]

Yeah.

[E]

No, please, please.

[D]

No, no. Everybody stop talking. What did you do?

[C]

It felt right at the moment.

[D]

What did you do?

[C]

His cell phone. And I sent his friend a text. And just a really quick, hey, dude, would it be cool if I asked your mom out?

[E]

Oh, no, you didn't.

[D]

Yeah.

[E]

No, you didn't.

[D]

Oh, my God.

[E]

Are you being serious?

[C]

I was trying to let him.

[E]

You are jealous, girl.

[C]

You think it is. It is a big deal. I wanted his friend to call him back and be pissed at him, and I wanted him to understand.

[E]

But that's on him. That's not on you.

[B]

That's on him. Before we move on. You understand that was wrong, right?

[D]

No, she doesn't.

[C]

Well, I voted was wrong. I don't think I did the right thing.

[D]

So he comes back from the bathroom.

[C]

No idea.

[D]

No idea. You just texted his friend?

[C]

I dropped the subject. We finished our dinner. That was Friday night. I have not heard from him all weekend.

[D]

Oh, I wonder why.

[B]

So you don't have an update? You don't know if his friend. The friend call back?

[C]

I have not heard from him. I left him one message on Sunday. I just thought I'd put out a little olive branch, and I haven't heard.

[E]

And I think he knows what you did.

[B]

Do you think his friend called him back?

[F]

Of course.

[E]

Or he saw the text. I mean, he looked in his sent box and there it was. And he knows he didn't send it. He knows she sent it.

[B]

Well, I'm sad that we don't have closure on.

[D]

No, I think we get closure asking.

[B]

But I am happy at the end in the undercover texting. That is brilliant.

[E]

By trying to save your friend's friendship with his best friend, you ruined your friendship with him.

[D]

She probably ruined everything.

[E]

It's over. Like he doesn't want to be your friend anymore. I feel like that's what you're wanted in the first place, is you wanted to be all up in everybody's business.

[A]

Well, she.

[D]

Well, it goes back to what Jen said is the fact that friends, if Jeff and I, we're big buddies, we're friends, boy, girl. And then he's gonna do something that I think is crazy. I'm like, dude, are you serious? That is so stupid. But he says, you. I want to do it. Okay, fine, whatever. I'll be there for you. But I think you're making a mistake. That's the extent of the conversation. And then we follow through together.

[E]

Right?

[D]

You have not approached this that way at all. So I totally agree with Jen that you have been hanging around because you. You're still got strong feelings for him.

[B]

Hey, Joseph. Welcome to the bird show. How are you?

[F]

Joseph, what's going on?

[D]

Hey.

[B]

Hey. Ellie can hear you. You got any thoughts for her?

[F]

Yeah, I mean, that's. How old are y'?

[C]

All?

[E]

Sorry, just out of college.

[B]

Ellie, how old are you guys?

[C]

I'm like 21.

[F]

Yeah, I mean, that's like. That's like middle school, high school stuff, isn't it? I mean, you just need to let your friend do whatever he's doing.

[B]

I love the. Isn't that very something? If they had text messaging when Heather's was a big movie.

[E]

Oh yeah.

[B]

Something would totally happen in Heather's. Hey, tc, thank you as always for being part of the bird show.

[F]

Hey, tc, Look, I mean, she's trying to beat around the bush. First of all, she is dead wrong. Second of all, she knows she still has feelings for the dude. I mean, to take such drastic actions as to actually send the other person to text. He is totally cock blocking.

[E]

Yep, I agree.

[B]

Love it.

[E]

I agree.

[B]

Thank you so much, tc.

[E]

I think you're sticking your nose where it doesn't need to be.

[B]

Tc. Cutting right to the chase. And then he's gone.

[E]

He's in and out. I like it.

[B]

Hey, Ellie, good luck with this. If you happen to get anything new or hear anything new, will you please email Tracy and let her know?

[C]

I will.

[B]

All right. Good luck with everything and thank you on your friendship. Yeah, and thank you so much for being a great radio guest.

[C]

All right, bye.

[B]

Take care. Bye. Bye. It's 9:30. This is the Bircho. You don't like. What?

[E]

I don't like her. That's a jerk move.

[D]

She loves him. And she was trying to sabotage all that and it worked.

[B]

And think about it. They're at dinner. She's probably got a couple glasses of wine in her system. She thinks it's a brilliant idea.

[E]

Who does that? And then she just ruined her friendship with Dude.

[B]

She should have changed his Facebook status while she was in there. If she had his phone gone, made it complicated or something right now.

[E]

Ellie's like, oh, you're right, Jeff.

[B]

This is the bird show.