The Bert Show: “Vault: He's Searching For The Best Make-Out Spots In The City!”

Date: February 16, 2026

Episode Overview

In this lighthearted and humorous episode of The Bert Show, the team fields a listener’s request for the best make-out spots in Atlanta. Raul, a recent transplant from Honduras by way of New Mexico, calls in for advice on romantic destinations, sparking a lively on-air brainstorm session, a wave of listener suggestions, and some raunchy storytelling from the hosts themselves. The cast—Bert, Sean, Mark, and others—combine playful banter, personal anecdotes, and local expertise to turn what could be a simple list into a deeply entertaining slice of southern radio culture.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Listener’s Dilemma (01:33–02:43)

• Raul’s Quest: Raul describes his recent move to Atlanta and asks the crew for recommendations for secluded, romantic places to make out, explaining:
  “Like, I just moved to this stage and, like, I was wondering if you guys could, like, let me know, like, which ones are the good places?” (01:33)
• The cast teases Raul about his accent and background, confirming he’s from Honduras but lived in New Mexico.

2. Atlanta Make-Out Spots: Suggestions & Stories (02:47–11:20)

• Drive-In Theaters (02:46–03:12)
  • The Starlight Drive-In is recommended as a classic, convenient option.
  • “There is a drive in movie theater. It's called the Starlight Drive-In.” (03:06)
• Nature Destinations
  • Raul reminisces about the scenic mountain make-out spots of New Mexico, prompting the hosts to reflect on how every hometown has its secret spot (03:46–04:06).
  • Callers recommend:
    • High Falls (04:54): “High Falls has some good spots. They got like trails and things and places out there.” – Caller Jonathan (04:54)
    • The River Overlook Near Roswell Road (05:53–06:36): A local shares a detailed, secret spot: “…there's a little gravel road that pulls off and goes over a big rock face. And it overlooks the river. Real pretty. Take a bottle of wine, some cheese, whatever. Have a great time.” – Jonathan (06:33)
    • Jones Bridge Park & Medlock Bridge Park (06:15): Other riverside destinations are noted for privacy and romance.
• The Urban/Naughty Picks
  • Buford Highway Apartments: Sean jokes about parking “in the shadows and watch[ing] the cops.” (05:41)
  • Old CompUSA Lot across from Lenox Mall (06:56): “There's a little abandoned parking lot, right? Oh, fabulous. Even, especially during the day.”
  • Baseball Dugout at Chastain (07:26):
    • “The little baseball dugout at Chastain late at night.” – Caller Raul (07:29)
    • Mark reminisces about fulfilling classic sports field fantasies, adding a racy personal touch:
      • “So one weekend it was the dugout in high school and the next weekend it was the 50 yard line.” (08:02)
  • Murphy Candler Park (08:27):
    • Christine describes a park with lots of foliage for privacy, memorable for both her personal escapades and seeing an unashamed couple “under a blanket, going at it just out in the open.” (08:54)
  • SCAD Parking Deck (09:46):
    • An unnamed caller shares: “If you go to SCAD and go up on the parking deck ... it's a great view of the city and nobody's ever up there.” (10:02)
• Construction Sites (10:38–11:31)
  • A joking suggestion: homes under construction, although this evolves into a gross-out tangent about construction workers leaving bodily waste behind walls, recounted in a memorable anecdote:
    • “I told you guys about Shay's house ... contractor ... pooped in a bucket and left it behind the walls.” (11:03)

3. Why Secret Spots Stay Secret (04:06; 06:34)

• The hosts muse on the reluctance of locals to reveal hidden romantic locales:
  • “I'm wondering if people don't want to give up their secrets. Maybe that's their secret cool place to go make out. They don't want to tell everybody.” (04:06)
• There’s a nostalgia for the ‘make-out hill’ tradition that may be fading, but the show’s callers prove secluded nooks are still alive and well.

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On the Fabled Make-Out Spot:
  “Every hometown had one ... Dictionary Hill in San Diego, Spring Valley was the place that you wanted to go make out.” – Mark (03:52)
• Jonathan’s Roswell River Overlook:
  “There’s a place right there on the right hand side of the road overlooks the river. Real pretty. Take a bottle of wine, some cheese, whatever. Have a great time.” – Jonathan (06:33)
• Playful Host Banter:
  “Don't come a-knocking!” – Sean, after the river overlook is described (06:51)
  “I want to sneak into your foliage!” – Co-host (09:30)
• Romantic High School Memories:
  “In my high school. At your high school with Debbie Pierce. She brought a cooler of watermelon shots out with us also. That was a cool night.” – Mark (07:52)
• On Hiding Places Evolving:
  “Homes being built make great make out places.” (10:38)
  “Except all the construction cups.” – Co-host (10:43)
  “Contractor ... pooped in a bucket and left it behind the walls.” – Co-host (11:03)

Timestamps for Important Segments

• Listener Raul Calls In: 01:33–02:43
• Starlight Drive-In Mention: 03:00–03:12
• Mountain/Nature Spots Discussion: 03:46–04:06
• Listeners Suggest Secret Make-Out Locations: 04:34–09:59
  • High Falls: 04:54
  • Roswell River Overlook: 05:53–06:48
  • CompUSA/Lennox Lot: 06:56–07:23
  • Chastain Dugout: 07:26–07:50
  • Murphy Candler Park: 08:27–09:22
  • SCAD Parking Deck: 09:46–10:23
• Construction Site Antics: 10:38–11:20

Episode Tone

The Bert Show crew keeps things raucous, cheeky, and full of inside jokes, riffing off each other and playfully teasing their callers. The community-centric spirit is palpable—they genuinely enjoy crowd-sourcing answers and building rapport with their listeners.

A perfect listen for Atlanta locals, new arrivals, or anyone nostalgic for their hometown’s own make-out spot legend!