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Show Host
The Burt Show Sherry Burback here is the author of at the Coffee Shop and Internet dating is not like ordering a Pizza. And if you guys are doing some Internet dating here and you're not having any luck, hopefully Sherry can give you a little hand here. Hey Sherry.
Sherry Burback
Hey, how are you?
Show Host
Good, how are you today?
Sherry Burback
I'm doing great, thanks.
Show Host
What are the biggest mistakes? Biggest mistakes people make in their profiles?
Sherry Burback
Oh, the profiles. Using a bad picture is a big one. You know, not taking a brand new picture of yourself, what you look like right now at this moment, instead of holding onto a picture that's a little bit too old or cropping out, you know, an ex girlfriend and putting that up as your profile picture. That's a big no. No.
Caller/Friend
One of my girlfriends is online dating right now, and she said a lot of guys have pictures of themselves up with girls in them.
Sherry Burback
Yes. With girls around there, you know, hanging onto them, you know, holding hands. Or maybe the guy has his hand around her shoulder and it's a. You know, it might be a friend, it might not be, but it gives the wr impression.
Co-host/Caller
Now, Sheri, a new study came out today that Talked about how 90% of people lie in their online dating profiles. I mean, is that true? Do you find that, and I mean, do you encourage people to kind of tweak themselves, too?
Sherry Burback
Oh, I don't encourage people to lie. I'm not sure where you know what exactly they're talking about with lying. That makes it sound like everybody is just completely dishonest online. And I personally didn't find that, you know, maybe people tweak certain things that aren't a big deal. I don't know. You want to present your best self. So I think maybe some people are maybe saying they make a little bit more money than they do or they are taller or weigh a little bit less. But overall, I think people are pretty honest. That was just my personal experience.
Caller/Friend
I think what people should do is they should say that they weigh more, that they're older than they are. Put up a really bad picture. Because then when you meet someone in person, you're like, wow, what a surprise.
Show Host
Rather than the other way around.
Sherry Burback
So much better than I thought it was going to look. Exactly.
Caller/Friend
Mix it up, people.
Show Host
If somebody sends you a message that they're interested in you, what should you send back? Should it be a short message? Should it be like this whole profile? Should it be a generic profile? Should each and every one of them be specific?
Sherry Burback
Well, if somebody's sending you a message, they've probably already seen your profile. So you don't want to copy and paste your. Whatever you have in your profile and send it. So you do want to just do a short message to, you know, if you're interested in talking further with them, send them something short that they can respond back to. Don't give them your whole life history. Leave a little bit of mystery there, but let them know that you're interested in talking further. I mean, you want to get a date. That's the ultimate goal of this. You don't want a pen pal, so you do want to just keep things short and email back and forth until you feel comfortable enough where you want to meet.
Lady Luck
And what are the best dating online sites and what are the worst online profile sites that you can go to?
Sherry Burback
Well, I've heard of people that have met other people on just about every site. So I think any site can probably be good for you depending on if you have the right attitude and the right profile. Having said that, I think the larger services like Match.com or Yahoo personals usually give you a wider variety of people and that way you have a kind of a better chance to meet somebody.
Caller/Friend
I'm sorry, are the ones you pay for often better than the free ones?
Sherry Burback
Yeah, I think so. I think people, if they're going to pay to set up a profile, they're going to be a little bit more serious about it. Those people tend to want more of a relationship, you know, rather than just they're testing it out. They're not. Maybe they're not even out of a relationship. They're not sure if they want to meet someone, somebody online. If you pay to have a profile set up, you're probably more serious about it and it's probably you're going to meet more quality people that way.
Show Host
Are there some websites, dating websites that sort of have their own niche, their own brand, like eharmony would be for older people. There would be another one that Generally if you're 24 or younger, you go to.
Sherry Burback
There are some sites really match.com kind of encompasses everybody. But there are some sites like eharmony. I've heard that people who are more interested in marriage will go to eharmony. I don't know if that's really true. That's what I've heard from people. That's not kind of the brand they push, but I think that's kind of the perception that people have about them. Sites like Perfect Match will give you a combination of like match.com and eHarmony, where you're set up with people through their site, but you're also able to search for profiles. So I'm not sure that there's any site that really caters to one person. There are some niche dating sites that you can check out too, if you have a specific interest. Like you really love horseback riding or you're echo conscious and you want to look at a green dating site. There are sites like that, and then the advantage in those is you have an immediate point of common interest with somebody. Then if you go on a site like that. But generally a larger site will get you pretty much no matter what age you are, will get you a wider variety of people that you can meet
Caller/Friend
who Dates more online. Men or women?
Sherry Burback
I think men date more online than women, actually, just from the people that have come to me for help with profiles, and I seem to come across more men that date online.
Show Host
Is there still a stigma attached to online dating? Like, I think Melissa's a little old school about online dating, where she still feels it's a little bit desperate.
Sherry Burback
You know, I think there is and there shouldn't be because it's just. It's such a great way to meet people. I think it's kind of that unknown, and so people are. Have. Are afraid of it, and they. All they hear is horror stories as opposed to the really positive stories. You know, I hear a lot of people that have met really somebody totally perfect for them online dating. And it's somebody that maybe that lived in the same area and they just had never met in all the years that they lived in that area. But it took the Internet to introduce them. But I think there is kind of a stigma and there shouldn't be. So don't be afraid of it.
Show Host
Yeah, I think it comes from personal ads back in the day. They just seem so cheesy and so desperate.
Co-host/Caller
Back in the newspaper, when online dating first started, it was for people who didn't feel socially confident. So I think that it was just for a certain. A certain age group. I think 35 and older. Online dating was something new. And it's for people who couldn't hang on their own in the clubs.
Sherry Burback
Yeah, I think you get busy when you get to be a certain age, even if you're not married, you start taking care of family, you start working more. You kind of have the same friend group. You don't meet as many friends as you do when you're in your 20s, so you tend to meet less people when you get a little bit older. And I think that's how online dating really got started.
Show Host
So some final advice. Let's say there's somebody checking us out this morning that has had a profile, or they're on a bunch of different sites and they just don't seem to be getting any responses at all with their profile. What's three tweaks they can make today to change their profile enough to where they might start to get some responses?
Sherry Burback
Okay. First of all, let your personality come through in your profile. Don't just list things about yourself. Don't say, I like wine and football and American Idol. Say, why you like those things. I developed a passion for wine tasting when I went to the French vineyards, something like that. Even those little bit of changes will help add a little bit more personality to your profile. Also, don't be negative. Don't use your profile as a chance to just complain about dating. And really a great picture will really set you up and go far. So have somebody take a digital camera, go out, take a bunch of pictures of yourself and add pictures that also add to your story. So have pictures where you're doing something you like, where you have something in the background that tells a little bit about yourself. Have the pictures add to your personality just as well as your essay.
Show Host
Okay, we're going to put all your information up online. Also, she's got two books. The books are at the coffee shop and Internet dating is not like ordering a pizza and we'll link up to them up on our site@q100atlanta.com thanks so much. Thanks Sherry.
Sherry Burback
Thanks. Bye Bye bye.
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Co-host/Caller
Com Batavia down with more.
Sherry Burback
Lots more.
The Bert Show
Episode: Vault: How to be Safe Dating Online
Date: June 15, 2026
This special "Vault" edition focuses on the do’s and don’ts of online dating with advice from author Sherry Burback, known for her books At the Coffee Shop and Internet Dating is Not Like Ordering a Pizza. The episode covers common mistakes people make in online dating profiles, the prevalence of dishonesty (or honesty!) online, site recommendations, perceptions of online dating, and practical tips for improving your dating profile. The Bert Show cast and Sherry keep the discussion real, light, and pepper it with both humor and practical wisdom, aiming to help listeners approach online dating with confidence and authenticity.
Using outdated or misleading photos: Sherry highlights that one of the most common profile mistakes is using old photos or cropping out an ex-partner.
Confusing impressions: Including other women in your profile photos can send the wrong message.
Tweaking vs. Lying: Sherry does not support outright dishonesty but acknowledges that people might “tweak” minor details (like height or income), while most are generally honest.
Humorous take on expectations: A caller jokes about setting expectations low in profiles to surprise dates positively.
General advice: Most major sites can work if you have the right attitude.
Recommendation for larger sites: Match.com and Yahoo Personals offer a wider pool.
Paid vs. Free sites: Paying typically signals greater seriousness.
Who dates more online?: According to Sherry’s observations, men tend to date online more than women.
Stigma around online dating: Though it persists, it’s decreasing as success stories become more common.
Why online dating developed: For people with less time or social connections as they age.
Inject personality: Don’t just list interests—explain why you like them.
Stay positive: Avoid using your profile to complain or vent about dating.
Upgrade your photos: Use high-quality pictures that show your interests and personality.
This episode offers a practical and empowering take on navigating online dating. Sherry Burback’s expert input demystifies common misconceptions, encourages listeners to present their authentic selves, and gives actionable advice for anyone looking to succeed in the online dating world—reminding us that confidence, honesty, and a little bit of personality go a long way.