Vault: Is He Too Old to Be Shopping With His Mom?

Summary

The Bert Show: Vault - "Is He Too Old to Be Shopping With His Mom?" (May 28, 2026)

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Episode Overview

In this lively and humorous episode, the Bert Show team dives into the awkward dynamics of adult men shopping for clothes with their mothers. Triggered by a recent observation at a department store, the cast debates: Is it weird for a grown man—specifically in his late 30s or early 40s—to shop and try on clothes with (and for) his mom? Listeners call in with their own stories, sparking a colorful discussion about independence, family roles, and the elusive line between supportive parenting and overbearing coddling.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

The Department Store Observation (00:30–01:48)

• Bert describes witnessing a man who appeared to be in his late 30s or early 40s shopping with his mother:
  • The mother picked out clothes, held items on her arm, and had her son come out of the dressing room to model outfits.
  • "It was playing out like he was a 13-year-old on his first day of school." (B, 01:12)
  • Cast members react with a mix of bewilderment and laughter.

Is There Ever a "Pass"? (00:59–02:21)

• Some try to justify it, suggesting possible scenarios (e.g., recently divorced, holiday visit), but most agree that openly modeling outfits for mom at that age is crossing into "creepy" territory.
  • "No, as a grown man, you cannot clothe shop with your mom while she's there." (B, 02:22)

Age Cut-offs & Alternatives (03:10–04:05)

• The cast debates what age it's no longer appropriate:
  • Consensus: After high school or, at the latest, college (and even then, only if there's a specific need and no other options).
  • "You can't model your clothes in high school. You'll get so much crap from everybody at school." (F, 03:51)
• Suggestions for men who lack style or confidence:
  • "If you have no style, find a gay man friend and he'll help you out." (E, 03:32)

Listeners’ Stories: When Mom's Involvement Goes Too Far (04:27–05:14)

• Ben’s Call (04:27):
  • Shares a story of a 32-year-old roommate whose mother took him Tupperware and grocery shopping, wrote him detailed laundry instructions, and accompanied him every Sunday.
  • "She made him a literal laundry list of how to do laundry… [he] consulted every single time he did laundry." (G, 04:34)
  • Cast attributes some blame to the mother for over-parenting: "That is her fault. If her grown son doesn't know how to do laundry. That's her fault." (C, 04:59)
  • "There is no place for another woman in his life if the mom is hovering that much." (B, 05:06)
  • "Cut the cord." (C, 05:14; E, 05:16)

More Listener Calls & Exceptions (05:23–07:28)

• Brent’s Call (05:23):

  • Asks if perhaps the man was just accompanied by a woman, not his mom. Bert clarifies: "No, this was obviously mom. I mean… it was an intimate, you know, other son relationship. They even looked alike. It was strange." (B, 05:39)

• Charles’ Call (05:56):

  • Describes his real-life situation: age 33, shopping for jeans with his mom due to financial family dynamics and unemployment.
  • Bert acknowledges exceptions, especially when hardship is involved: "Your story is gonna be so different… we could always find a family or two that doesn’t fit the mold…" (B, 07:09)

Drawing the Line: The Emotional Debate (07:28–End)

• The cast distinguishes between spending quality time (like treating mom to lunch) and infantilizing behavior:
  • Taking mom out, paying for lunch: good.
  • Mom still picking out and holding clothes for a grown man: "still babying."
• Argument between cast members about motivations ("It's a treat for mom" vs. "Cut the cord"):
  • "Let your babies go, honey." (C, 09:44)
  • “There’s a Matlock marathon! Find another joy!” (B, 09:41)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “If a grown man cannot buy his own clothes, you don't want to be with him.” (C, 03:03)
• “As a grown man, you cannot clothe shop with your mom while she's there.” (B, 02:22)
• “If you have no style, find a gay man friend and he'll help you out.” (E, 03:32)
• “There is no place for another woman in his life if the mom is hovering that much.” (B, 05:06)
• “Cut the cord.” (C, 05:14; E, 05:16)

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Important Timestamps

• 00:30 – Bert introduces the department store scenario.
• 01:19 – Discussion of the “modeling for mom” detail.
• 02:22 – The cast draws a hard line on age appropriateness.
• 03:17–03:45 – Debate on when it stops being okay.
• 04:27 – Ben’s call about his roommate and over-involved mom.
• 05:23 – Brent’s call: Confirming it was definitely “mom.”
• 05:56 – Charles’ call: An exception from a large family, financial stress.
• 07:28 – Drawing distinctions between quality time and infantilizing.
• 09:10 – Cast agrees acceptable scenario (mom pays, son shops alone).
• 09:41 – “Find another joy” Matlock marathon punchline.

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Tone & Style

• The conversation is playful, real, and packed with banter.
• Cast members don’t shy away from blunt opinions but maintain warmth and humor.
• The exchange is meant to be entertaining, a little provocative, and inviting for listener participation.

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Summary

This episode delivers an entertaining exploration of modern adulthood, independence, and boundaries within family relationships. While everyone acknowledges exceptions, the consensus is clear: at a certain age, a man must be able to shop for his own clothes—and model them, if needed—for anyone but his mother. Anything else? “Cut the cord.”

Transcript

[A]

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[B]

the Burt Show Quick observation that I thought was a little weird the other day in a department store. And I may be totally overthinking it.

[C]

Okay.

[B]

And maybe it's just strange to me. Is it odd when an adult man is shopping like, so you're Talking about a 35, 40 year old dude is shopping with his mother who is there buying him clothes. It's kind of funny. Okay, it is weird.

[C]

Well, okay, yes.

[B]

All right.

[D]

It's only.

[C]

But this time of year is any past to this time of year when the mom comes into town and forces him to go with her.

[D]

It's not even force. It's. I think you have to.

[E]

Are you sure it was for him? Absolutely. Like shopping for the dad?

[B]

No, no, no. This was playing out like he was a 13 year old on like his first day of school. So he would come out of the dressing room with a sweater on.

[E]

Oh, stop.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. I didn't know if I was just being. If I just thought it was weird and creepy or not.

[F]

Did she find funny pajamas too? I mean, let's just like give him

[B]

some shirts, try them on.

[C]

What a mom.

[B]

Oh, it was a whole ensemble. Like first he came out and he was trying jeans on so he would turn around for and see if it fit all the way around.

[F]

I swear, you can't do that. No, not as a grown man you can't.

[B]

Then he put a sweater on. And then when he found items that he liked, she kept them on one arm and carried them around the store as he continued to shop for a daughter.

[D]

Hold on a minute.

[C]

What if that's not his mama?

[D]

Just being devil's advocate. What if this guy is a bachelor for whatever reason? Maybe he's newly divorced. Maybe he's a bachelor, whatever.

[B]

Hand him out.

[D]

And he's been rocking the same clothes for, you know, for a year or two. Mom comes in town for the holidays and is like, bert, come on, you can't wear. Last time I saw you last Christmas, you're wearing the same outfit. I know you're a single guy now. Whatever. Blow Come on, this is your Christmas present. Let's go to the. And he hates it, but she forces him to do it.

[C]

Nope, nope.

[B]

No. As a grown man, you cannot clothe shop with your mom while she's there.

[C]

Because that was my point when I said the past with her being in town. But that's only if she's standing at the rack going, huh? Why don't you buy Mom? Come on, let's go. Let's go. But to try them on and to model for her is a whole different.

[E]

Mom can shop for you, and you can shop for mom, but you can't

[B]

shop together when you're that age. So let me ask you this. Like, let's say he's 37 and the younger brother is 35 years old, and the mother is taking both of them Mama's boys. Still not mama's boys.

[C]

Those are men you don't want to marry. Mom doesn't like anybody you date.

[F]

You're screwed.

[D]

I don't think.

[B]

I'm so glad my strange radar was up, because it did seem a little odd to me.

[C]

If a grown man cannot buy his own clothes, you don't want to be with him. Yeah.

[E]

You got to go home and tell Stacy.

[G]

Never.

[E]

Is this going to be okay for

[B]

you to do so at what year is it okay for? I mean, what's that? That year? I mean, in college, I'm assuming you're allowed to go, right?

[F]

Not even 16 before high school.

[B]

Like, if you're in college and you come home, you don't have any cash

[C]

or anything, you're mama can give you

[F]

cash and you can go on your own.

[E]

Mama's just got to send you out

[D]

to go for it.

[E]

Yes, I understand her still paying for

[C]

it in college, but you got to get your own clothes.

[E]

Yeah. And if you have no style, find a gay man friend and he'll help you out.

[C]

Yeah. Or when you're pal.

[B]

After high school, it's over.

[C]

Not even before high school. I think 15, I think is fine without.

[E]

If you're going school shopping for going to college, like moving to college and you're doing all that, that's fine, too.

[C]

We're talking about clothes and modeling the clothes.

[F]

You can't model your clothes in high school. You'll get so much crap from everybody at school.

[B]

I didn't realize it was. I knew it was bizarre, but I didn't realize it was that bizarre.

[D]

15 without knowing the circumstances. I don't. I don't find it that odd, really.

[B]

Without knowing it is odd to watch I'm telling you, I have never seen it before, but watching it, I'm like, something's not right about this.

[C]

So your mom has taken you shopping?

[D]

No, but I don't think I would have a problem with that. If I was back in Syracuse and we were out, you know, went to the mall or whatever, and she said, you got to get whatever, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, I would have no problem.

[B]

I'd say, let me have the cash. Hey, Ben. Good morning. You're on Q100.

[G]

Good morning. You guys ready to raise this to a whole new.

[B]

Let's go.

[C]

I am ready.

[B]

Come on.

[C]

Here we go.

[G]

Okay. My roommate was 32 when he moved in. His mom took shopping for Tupperware and for groceries and everything. She made him a literal laundry list of how to do laundry. Step one, separate your color. Step two, and everything that he consulted every single time he did laundry. And she took him every Sunday afternoon to go grocery shopping.

[C]

I would tell the both of them to go pick their switch because I think that it's. That is her fault. If her grown son doesn't know how to do laundry. That's her fault.

[B]

There is no place for another woman in his life if the mom is hovering that much.

[C]

Hell no.

[B]

At that age, mom gotta back off.

[C]

Cut the cord.

[E]

And you gotta make mom do it right.

[C]

Yes. Cut the cord.

[B]

She'll want to see you like that little boy forever.

[C]

Hey, Brett.

[B]

Good morning. You're on Q100.

[G]

Hey there, bur show. How y' all doing?

[B]

Good. Brent.

[G]

How are you doing? Well, was the guy calling him Mommy the whole time? I was just curious because I know that at Bloomingdale and at other places, they have a lot of their employees just follow the customers around.

[B]

No, this was. This was obviously Mom. I mean, they were. Yeah, it was an intimate, you know, other son relationship. They even looked alike. It was strange.

[D]

He was also nursing.

[B]

Hey, Charles.

[D]

Good morning.

[B]

You're on Q100.

[H]

Good morning. Good morning.

[B]

Good morning, sir.

[H]

Hey. Yup. You said you saw him in the stores. You don't really know the story behind what was going on, right?

[B]

All I know is that there was a grown man that was shopping with his mom that was coming out of the dressing room, and he was putting his clothes on for her, and she was holding them and. Yeah, I mean, as far as I know, I think she paid with her credit card. I mean, I didn't watch it that closely, but it seemed like she was pretty in charge of the whole thing.

[F]

He was modeling his clothes for her.

[B]

Yeah, he'd come out of the dressing room and ask her if everything fit right.

[C]

Does my butt look good in these jeans, mom, that. That should never be said.

[B]

I'd say he's right. Late 30s, early 40s.

[H]

Well, the reason why. The reason why I ask is, you know, I'm 33 myself. I turned 34 the end of February. And this past weekend, I just went through basically about the same situation. My mom took me, I stepped me to Walmart to get me some jeans because I'm the primary financial provider in the household. My mom, she was working until she got put out of work. Medical leave. So she collected unemployment for that.

[B]

Mm.

[H]

And I've got a total of 11 people in my house.

[B]

Look, Charles, your story is gonna be so different than what I saw go down at this department store. I mean, we could always find a family or two that doesn't fit the mold. But I mean, we're just talking about two pretty well to do people. With mom shopping with the son, making sure he's wearing the right stuff.

[C]

See, the fact that he's. I mean, that she's still doing all that for him. Like my brother and my elderly mom, she's a widow. So once she became a widow, my brother on Saturdays will take her to lunch when he can. So that's sweet, because he's taking her to lunch, he's paying for lunch, and he's being sweet to his mama. This mama is still babying this 30 something year old guy, late 30s.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

And making him try and close us.

[D]

Okay, now hold on. Let's say hypothetically, with your brother.

[C]

Why are you standing this, dude?

[D]

Because I don't think. Because you and your mom, you have

[B]

gone shopping with your mom.

[D]

I haven't, but I wouldn't have a problem doing it because your brother and your mom are sitting at lunch.

[C]

Yeah.

[D]

And your mom says to your brother, hey, you know what? Like, whatever. Every time we've gone to lunch for the past three weeks, you've been wearing the same sweatshirt. I have to be honest with you, it's driving me nuts. Can we get you a new sweater? And he's like.

[C]

And he would say no.

[D]

And he's like, yeah.

[B]

And then she goes.

[D]

And then she says, please, I don't get out of the house too much. And I would love to take you to the mall, I guarantee you, and buy you a sweater.

[C]

I guarantee you my brother would never be in the situation in which he is trying on clothes for Millie Pete, ever, ever, if he was desperate to go get something new. And he was trying, and he needed a girl.

[D]

It's not his idea.

[C]

And he needed a girl. I don't care. He would say, no, see, I would

[D]

do that for my mom. I'm sorry your brother doesn't like your mom.

[C]

I'm sorry that you. I mean, it's like, cut the cord. You're not. You're a grown man.

[D]

It's a treat for your mom.

[B]

I'm looking at all these guys call up, trying to make excuses, like maybe this could have been his sugar mom. No, man, they looked alike. That was his mom.

[G]

Yeah.

[E]

No, and I think if, like, in your scenario, at lunch, they go to lunch, and she's like, I want to buy you some new clothes. Well, great. Okay. So they both go into the department store. He goes and tries on his cloth himself, comes back out and says, this is the one. I really like, mom. And she's like, oh, let me buy it for you.

[C]

Great.

[E]

Like, that I don't have a problem with. But it's the trying on and the modeling and the texture pile. No pile.

[B]

Yeah, the texture was. It was a planned, like, shopping trip. Trip together.

[C]

And it's like you said, the responsibility to answer Jeff's question. My brother would then say, well, look. Look, if it's bad enough, I'm gonna take my sister with me to go to the store. If I have to try on for anybody, if somebody needs to sit, see me in the clothes, he would take his sister. He would not take his mama. But it's a treat totally different.

[D]

It's a treat for mama. It's the only joy she has.

[E]

No.

[B]

Find another joy. There's a Matlock marathon.

[C]

Let your babies go, honey.

[E]

Some grandkids to shop for.

[B]

The Birch Show.