Vault: Katie Jos Trivia Game

Summary

The Bert Show: Vault — Katie Jo’s NASCAR Trivia Game

Original Air Date: November 4, 2025
Host: Katie (possibly Katie Birch)
Guests/Participants: Melissa, Jen, Jeff, others
Episode Focus: NASCAR Trivia Challenge

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Episode Overview

This episode features a spirited and humorous NASCAR trivia challenge dubbed the "Katie Jo Trivia Game." The segment blends competitive fun, friendly ribbing, and classic Bert Show banter as Melissa tests her knowledge against ten NASCAR questions crafted by the host, Katie. Stakes are set: if Melissa gets three or more answers wrong, she's spared from "boot camp" but must do an extended on-air monologue the next day, making for an entertaining high-wire act of sports trivia, personality, and camaraderie.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Stakes and Setup of the Game ([01:53] – [03:06])

• Melissa’s Preparation:
  • Melissa admits to moderate study, but not all night, for this NASCAR quiz.
  • The host sets the playful tone, predicting Melissa won’t get all answers correct but some should be within reach, given her fandom.
    • "You've been studying your whole life. I mean, you're a big NASCAR fan. So these questions ... I think some of them are going to be easy. I think some of them are going to be more challenging." — Host [02:11]
• Game Mechanics:
  • If Melissa misses 3 or more, she avoids "boot camp" but earns a minute and a half of required monologue time per miss.
  • Light-hearted pressure from co-hosts, especially Jeff and Jen.

2. The Trivia Contest: Questions and Answers ([03:06] – [05:36])

• Katie Jo is asked a series of 10 NASCAR-related questions, covering terminology, history, figures, and pop culture intersections.
• Notable exchange:
  • "I would predict that you're not going to get all 10 right." — Host [02:17]
  • "Okay, well, we’ll see." — Melissa [02:26]

Selected Questions and Melissa's Responses:

• Q1: What is the definition of “marbles” in NASCAR?
  Melissa: "A reference to the driver's bravery or cojones in making a pass."

• Q2: What’s the longest race of the NASCAR season?
  Melissa: "The Pepsi 600."

• Q3: How many points does the last car earn?
  Melissa: "30."

• Q4: Sterling Marlin’s post-wreck superstition?
  Melissa: "He runs around the track."

• Q5: Average sponsor pays in the Cup Series?
  Melissa: "$10 million."

• Q6: Driver appearance fee per hour?
  Melissa: "$100,000."

• Q7: First woman to qualify for Daytona 500?
  Melissa: "Janet Green."

• Q8: What North Carolina city does Dale Jr. reside in?
  Melissa: "Charlotte."

• Q9: Worst traffic jam in NASCAR?
  Melissa: "Talladega."

• Q10: Driver who endorses Halston 714 Cologne?
  Melissa: "Dale Jr."

• The playful anxiety builds up as the answers are quickly delivered.

3. The Reveal: Correcting the Record ([05:36] – [12:27])

• The host runs through the answers, often with group commentary, teasing, and good-natured sarcasm.
  • "Katie Jo, the first question was, in NASCAR, what is the definition of marbles? And you were referring to a man's testicles, which a lesbian should never do." — Host [06:15]
  • "Marbles refers to ... excess rubber tire found at the edge of the racetrack." — Host [06:27]
• Tallying up the monologue penalty time with Jen and Jeff keeping score.
• Multiple wrong answers spark jabs and support:
  • "Wrong soft drink." — Jeff, as Melissa says "Pepsi 600" instead of "Coca Cola 600" [07:18]
  • "Stay lazy, pony girl." — Jeff [07:38]

Score Breakdown:

• Correct Answers:

  • Sponsor payout ($10 million)

• Partial/Overturned:

  • Dale Jr.'s city: Melissa says "Charlotte," judges eventually concede Mooresville's proximity.

• Mistakes/Incorrects:

  • Most other answers were incorrect, punctuated by humorous disbelief or sympathy.

• On her answer about "marbles," the group jokes:

  • "Let the record show, Katie, Jo got the question about testicles wrong." — Jeff [06:44]

• Jokes, commiseration, and trivia facts pepper the segment as the minutes accrue for Melissa’s upcoming monologue.

4. Final Tally and “Monologue Time” ([12:27] – [13:25])

• Result: Melissa gets 2 answers correct (1 outright, 1 on a technicality); she's assigned four minutes of monologue.
• The group discusses how long on-air minutes feel, referencing a prior karaoke segment.
  • "Do you remember how long 60 seconds felt when we had to karaoke?" — Jen [12:48]
  • They attempt an awkward, silent 30 seconds on air to demonstrate time.
    • "Let's just all be silent for just 30 seconds ... here's 30 seconds right now." — Host [12:53]

5. Notable Quotes & Moments

Confidence, Humor, and Sarcasm:

• "You were referring to a man's testicles, which a lesbian should never do." — Host, on the 'marbles' confusion [06:15]
• "Stay lazy, pony girl." — Jeff, urging Melissa to focus on the silver lining of not facing boot camp [07:38]
• "Melissa has gone from a natural smile to the kind of like fake smile to the 'Good God, this is gonna be the longest four minutes of my life.'" — Host, describing Melissa's mood as penalty time racks up [11:46]
• "At least I don't have to do boot camp ever. At least you got that going for you." — Host [12:39]

Pop Culture/Trivia Observations:

• Confusion about NASCAR facts demonstrates the challenge even for self-professed fans.
• Jokes about soft drink sponsors, geography ("Is Mooresville like the Marietta of Charlotte?" — Jeff [10:31]), and celebrity driver perks.

---

Timestamps for Key Segments

• 01:53 – Introduction of trivia challenge, stakes explained
• 03:06 – Trivia questioning begins
• 05:36 – Start of answer reveal and scoring
• 08:37 – Melissa’s first correct answer (sponsorship payout)
• 09:33 – Janet Guthrie question and correction
• 10:24 – Dale Jr.’s city debated
• 12:09 – Cologne endorsement correction
• 12:27 – Final tally, penalty confirmed
• 12:53 – "30 seconds of silence" comedic moment
• 13:25 – End of segment, lighthearted wrap-up

---

Tone & Style

The entire episode exudes classic Bert Show warmth: genuinely funny, a little snarky, always inclusive, and great at creating a sense of community among listeners. The hosts maintain a breezy, teasing rapport—never mean-spirited, always supportive—even as they rib each other about trivia mishaps and impending on-air dares.

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Takeaway

Katie Jo’s NASCAR Trivia Game is a testament to the lively, unvarnished camaraderie that defines The Bert Show. While the trivia accuracy may be spotty, the quick wit, supportive teasing, and shared embarrassment make for a highly entertaining listen—reminding fans that it’s not always about what you know, but how much fun you have trying.

Transcript

[Adam Grant]

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[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

The Birch Show Hey Katie.

[Melissa]

Joe, good morning.

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

How are you today?

[Melissa]

I'm great. How are you?

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

Good. You know, I know you were up studying all night last night.

[Melissa]

Not all night.

[Jen]

Not all night. But that means she definitely studied.

[Melissa]

I studied a little bit. I studied a little bit.

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

Well, you've been studying your whole life. I mean, you're a big NASCAR fan. So these questions. I think that if you have been following NASCAR most of your life. Some of them are going to be easy. I think some of them are going to be more challenging. I would predict that you're not going to get all 10. Right.

[Melissa]

Okay, well, we'll see.

[Jeff]

And, well, what Melissa is hoping is that you get three or more wrong because that saves her from boot camp. However, it would still cost her at least a minute and a half of monologue time.

[Melissa]

Right, right. So, yeah, I did a little bit of research and figured out there's a lot I, I don't know, but we'll see. We'll see.

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

Confidence.

[Paige Desorbo]

Come on.

[Jen]

Confidence.

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

Yeah, it's all about attitude. You got to have a little more confidence in this.

[Melissa]

Well, I'm sure it'll be fine regardless because it's just a win win for everybody here. More in the morning than that.

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

All right, I have put together a list of 10 trivia questions based on NASCAR.

[Hers Weight Loss Advertiser]

All right.

[Melissa]

Oh, God.

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

You ready for question number one? All right, Katie Jo, in NASCAR, what is the definition of marbles?

[Melissa]

That would be a reference to the driver's bravery or cojones in making a pass.

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

The longest race of the NASCAR season is which race?

[Melissa]

That would be the Pepsi 600.

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

The car that comes in first in any NASCAR event receives 180 points towards the Nextel cup championship. The last car in finishing order receives how many points?

[Melissa]

30.

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

After a race day wreck. Driver Sterling Marlin is notorious for executing this superstition. What is it.

[Melissa]

He runs around the track?

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

The average amount a primary sponsor pays in the NASCAR Cup Series is how much money 10 million a company can expect to spend. How much money per hour for a primary driver like Dale Jr. Or Jeff Gordon to do a personal appearance? How much money per hour?

[Melissa]

$100,000.

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

In 1977, she was the first woman driver to qualify for the Daytona 500. What is her name?

[Melissa]

Janet. Janet Green.

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

What North Carolina city does Dale Jr. Currently reside in?

[Melissa]

Charlotte.

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

The drive into this speedway is regarded as the worst traffic jam in the NASCAR world. What track is it?

[Melissa]

Talladega.

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

What current driver? This is question number 10. This is it. What current driver endorses Halston 714 Cologne? Dale Jr. All right, give us a couple of minutes here, Katie Jo. We come back, I will tell you how many you got right or how many you got wrong. Okay, we will do the math and we will find out if Melissa has to do any monologue at all tomorrow and if she does, how much. All right, let's find out how long this monologue is gonna be. I told you that you're gonna have to do some tomorrow. All right, Katie Jo?

[Melissa]

Yes.

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

You ready?

[Melissa]

I'm ready.

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

Now, you said you felt pretty confident. At least four of the answers.

[Melissa]

Yeah, maybe four.

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

And keep in mind, when I was putting these together, I have no reference at all of nascar. So I had kind of a sense of, you know, that I knew I didn't want you to get them all right? But I had no idea which ones are going to be hard and which ones weren't because I don't watch nascar. So I took these out of one book, and the book is in the back somewhere. It's like the Women's Guide to NASCAR or something like that. All right, here we go. Katie Jo, the first question was, in nascar, what is the definition of marbles? And you were referring to a man's testicles, which a lesbian should never do.

[Jeff]

As you often do.

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

And you said it probably has something to do with a man. A driver's bravery. I think that makes great common sense when he. When passing or whatever.

[Jen]

Yeah.

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

That marbles refers to some bravery. Great common sense. Not the accurate answer. That is excess rubber tire found at the edge of the racetrack.

[Melissa]

All right.

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

Okay, so that's one wrong, of course. That's 30 seconds. Jen, will you keep track of these for me?

[Jen]

Yes.

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

And the time.

[Jeff]

Let the record show, Katie, Joe got the question about testicles wrong.

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

I'm feeling pretty bad for you on this one. The longest race of the NASCAR season is which race. You were confident. You answered quickly. You said the Pepsi 600 at Lowe's Motor Speedway.

[Jen]

Yeah.

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

In thinking about it now, do you know what you said wrong?

[Paige Desorbo]

Uh.

[Melissa]

Oh, I think that I. I don't think it's at the right. Did I say the speedway? Did I say the wrong speedway?

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

It's The Coca Cola 600.

[Melissa]

Coca Cola 600.

[Jeff]

Oh, wrong soft drink.

[Jen]

Oh.

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

You had the right race, wrong sponsor.

[Melissa]

There you go.

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

I still support her and all the aunts. That was close.

[Jen]

That's one minute for Melissa.

[Jeff]

Melissa. If she gets one more wrong, you're out of boot camp. Think of it that way.

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

Yeah. See, Jeff, Always looking at the positive.

[Jen]

That's our Jeff.

[Jeff]

If you get one more wrong, Melissa, you can stay lazy. Stay lazy, pony girl.

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

Question number three was the car that comes in first in any NASCAR event receives 180 points. You said yes. That wasn't even the question yet. The last car in finishing order receives how many points? You said 30. The answer is 34.

[Jeff]

Oh, no.

[Jen]

Uh.

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

Oh, damn.

[Jen]

There's a minute.

[Jeff]

Minute and a half, 90 seconds after.

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

A race day wreck. This driver, Sterling Marlin, is notorious for executing this superstition. What is it you said? He gets out of the car and he just runs around the track.

[Jeff]

Did you make that up?

[Melissa]

Yes.

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

It's pretty quick. No, he always throws away his shoes. He thinks they're bad luck, so he throws away his shoes.

[Melissa]

I'm just asking, has she got any right yet?

[Jeff]

None.

[Jen]

Not yet.

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

Just check.

[Melissa]

It's gonna be a long weekend.

[Jeff]

Two minutes.

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

Now, you're gonna have. You're gonna have a lot of TV time this weekend. The average amount of a primary sponsor paying in the NASCAR Cup Series is how much money you write off the. You said $10 million. You nailed it. $10 million. You got it.

[Hers Weight Loss Advertiser]

That's right.

[Jen]

That's right.

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

Oh, sweet.

[Jeff]

You're still holding solid at two minutes. What's the deal with post offices?

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

Oh, God, this is gonna suck. Question number six was a company can expect to spend how much money per hour from a primary driver, like a guy like Dale Jr. Or Jeff Gordon to do a personal appearance? You said it's gotta be about $100,000. The right answer is about half of that $50,000 to get those guys out there for an hour.

[Melissa]

I'm learning so much.

[Jeff]

Two and a half minutes. You're learning what his celibate life is gonna be like, tell you that much. You need to live in Father Bailey's existence for a while.

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

In 1977, she was the first woman driver to qualify for the Daytona 500. You said. I know this. You read it last night. You said Janet Green. It was Janet Guthrie.

[Jeff]

Janet Green was the girl who always stole your crayons. Back in fifth grade.

[Melissa]

They used to beat me up.

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

How many minutes are we up to now?

[Jeff]

Three.

[Jen]

Yep, we're up to three.

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

Three. No.

[Melissa]

Is he sweating yet?

[Jen]

Yeah, we're up to three minutes.

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

Three minutes. How you doing, Melissa? It's three minutes. Oh, I'm just listening.

[Adam Grant]

Uh.

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

Oh, she's got that fake smile.

[Jen]

She's doing that tapping her pen on the desk thing.

[Melissa]

I've seen that before.

[Jeff]

A priest, a rabbi and a lesbian walk into a bar.

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

What North Carolina city does Dale Jr. Currently reside in? That's your dude, right?

[Melissa]

That's my guy.

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

That's your guy. You said Charlotte. It's Mooresville, North Carolina. Oh, come on. I don't even know if that's outside of Charlotte.

[Jeff]

Is that like the Marietta of Charlotte?

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

I have no idea. That's what it's listed as, Mooresville. Look, it's not. It's not.

[Jeff]

Come on, give her that one.

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

We don't even know where Mooresville is.

[Jen]

Look up Mooresville.

[Jeff]

I'll map quest it. What's the. What's. What is. What is a suburb perimeter? Trying to help you, Melissa?

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

No idea. It's got a lot.

[Jeff]

Melissa. You should say like 400 miles.

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

Yeah, look it up.

[Jeff]

What's the deal with Mooresville? Why can't you just say you're from Charlotte?

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

The drive into this speedway is regarded as the worst traffic jam in the NASCAR world. What track is it? You said Talladega. The correct answer was Pocono.

[Melissa]

I thought you meant in the South.

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

Okay, there are other parts of the country.

[Jeff]

Why would he. Why would he.

[Melissa]

Other parts of the country.

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

Yeah, there are other parts of the country where NASCAR is run.

[Melissa]

I got it.

[Jeff]

Okay, Is Mooresville with one O or.

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

It is with one R. Two R's.

[Jeff]

What?

[Adam Grant]

Huh?

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

One O, Two R's.

[Adam Grant]

I mean.

[Jen]

Okay, we're up to four minutes. If Mooresville's wrong.

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

Well, I know Mooresville's right. He's just saying how far out of Charlotte it is.

[Jeff]

I mean, I'm gonna give it.

[Jen]

I think we give it to her Charlotte morsel thing. That's what I meant.

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

And the final question. Melissa. Melissa has gone from a natural smile to the kind of like fake smile to the Good God, this is gonna be the longest four minutes of my life.

[Melissa]

She's not proud right now.

[Jen]

Uh oh, she can't even speak to you.

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

The last question. The last question was, what current driver endorses Halston 714 Cologne?

[Melissa]

I got this wrong, too.

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

I think you said, my boy. This is my boy. Dale Jr. Can add another 30 seconds.

[Adam Grant]

Oh, no.

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

The correct answer was Jeff Gordon. So we're.

[Jen]

Isn't he your enemy?

[Melissa]

I don't like Jeff Gordon, but I don't know, they're colognes. Yeah, I. I shanked out pretty good. But Mooresville is. Mooresville is 30 minutes from Charlotte.

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

30 minutes from Charlotte. You want to give her that one?

[Jen]

Yeah, let's give her that one. All right.

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

Four minutes, dude. What? Four minutes. You're the one that's always stickler for the rules. Four minutes. I'll bend them for you because you're a lesbian. Four minutes of. Four minutes of stand up comedy tomorrow. Well, at least I don't have to do boot camp ever. At least you got that going for you.

[Jeff]

Eight.

[Jen]

Wrong. Two. Correct. Katie Jo.

[Melissa]

Well, gonna have to work on that.

[Jen]

Oh, do you remember how long 60 seconds felt when we had to karaoke.

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

Let's do. Okay. Let's just all be silent for just 30 seconds. Okay, here's 30 seconds right now.

[Melissa]

I can't do it.

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

That's 10.

[Jeff]

Oh, God.

[Adam Grant]

Oh, no.

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

That's 20. Oh, you don't feel bad?

[Jen]

Yeah.

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

Four minutes. Tomorrow I'll do it.

[Jeff]

How many NASCAR drivers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

I am never watching NASCAR again, I.

[Hers Weight Loss Advertiser]

Can tell you that.

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

The Birch Show.

[Jeff]

Dude, did you order the new iPhone 17 Pro? Got it from Verizon, the best 5G network in America. I never look so good.

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

You look the same.

[Jeff]

But with this camera, everything looks better. Especially me.

[Host (possibly Katie Birch)]

You haven't changed your hair in 15 years.

[Verizon Advertiser]

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[Adam Grant]

Hey, it's Adam Grant from Ted's podcast Work Life, and this episode is brought to you by ServiceNow. AI is only as powerful as the platform it's built into. That's why it's no surprise that more than 85% of the Fortune 500 companies use the ServiceNow AI platform. While other platforms duct tape tools together, ServiceNow seamlessly unifies people, data, workflows, and AI connecting every corner of your business. And with AI agents working together autonomously, anyone in any department can focus on the work that matters Most. Learn how ServiceNow puts AI to work for [e-mail].

[Paige Desorbo]

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[Hannah Berner]

I'm Hannah Berner, and I'm also thinking about underwear, but I prefer full coverage. I like to call my granny panties.

[Paige Desorbo]

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[Jen]

Same.

[Hannah Berner]

They're so light and so comfy. And if it's not comfortable, I'm not wearing it.

[Paige Desorbo]

And the bras? Soft, supportive, and actually breathable.

[Hannah Berner]

Yes. Lord knows the girls need to breathe. Also, I need my PJs to breathe and be buttery, soft and stretchy enough for my dramatic tossing and turning at night. That's why I live in my Tommy John pajamas.

[Paige Desorbo]

Plus, they're so cute because they fit perfectly.

[Hannah Berner]

Put yourself on to Tommy John.

[Paige Desorbo]

Upgrade your drawer with Tommy John. Save 25% for a limited time at tommyjohn.comfort. see site for details.