Vault: Listeners ask a divorce attorney anything

Summary

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The Bert Show: Vault – Listeners Ask a Divorce Attorney Anything

Original Air Date: June 4, 2026
Featured Guest: Evan Summerstein, Divorce Attorney

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Episode Overview

This FAQ-style episode of The Bert Show features divorce attorney Evan Summerstein answering pressing listener questions about divorce, alimony, child custody, property division, legal separation, and more — all with a Georgia law focus. Listeners call in (often with their voices disguised) seeking direct, no-nonsense legal guidance. Evan clarifies misconceptions, gives practical steps for those starting the divorce process, and discusses common divorce pitfalls and legal procedures in a conversational, approachable manner.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Divorce "Season" (00:36–01:00)

• Evan explains the post-holiday divorce spike:
  “Everybody makes it through the holidays and then the phone starts ringing.”
  The analogy: Divorce attorneys’ busiest period mirrors accountants’ tax season.

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2. Alimony & Infidelity in Georgia (01:12–02:49)

• Adultery as a Bar to Alimony:
  “Under Georgia law, adultery is a bar to alimony. So if the cause of the divorce is adultery, then that would stop you from being able to receive alimony.” – Evan (01:50)
• Condonation Explained:
  If the spouse forgave the infidelity and attempted reconciliation, adultery can’t later be cited as grounds for divorce.
• No Strict Timeline:
  Key point: What matters is whether the couple reconciled, not how much time passed.

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3. Types of Alimony & Duration (03:15–04:21)

• Short-Term (Rehabilitative) Alimony is Common:
  “What you most commonly see nowadays is what’s called rehabilitative alimony…to help you get back on your feet after the divorce.” – Evan (03:31)
• Long-Term Alimony is Rare:
  “That traditional idea of permanent…lifetime alimony, you don’t see it much anymore.” – Evan (03:59)
• Short marriages usually won’t result in long-term support.

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4. How to Start the Divorce Process & When One Spouse Refuses (04:31–06:38)

• You Don’t Need Consent for Divorce:
  “Nowadays it only takes one person to get divorced.” – Evan (05:11)
• Step-by-Step Guidance:
  • Consult an attorney
  • Research online (e.g., fultonfamilydivision.com for forms/guides)
• Divorce By Publication:
  If you can’t locate your spouse, a divorce may be granted without their participation.

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5. Legitimation of Children after Marriage (06:39–07:05)

• If you have children before marriage and then marry the other parent, you are “legally recognized as their father” in Georgia.

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6. Adultery, Property, and Custody Rights (07:27–10:02)

• Adultery & Property Division:
  “Adultery has to be the cause of the divorce itself [to block alimony], and if you had already separated before it occurred, it might not matter.” – Evan (08:00)
• Rights to Property and Children:
  “You don’t give up rights to, you know, ownership of the house or…property…That would definitely include the kids, too.” – Evan (09:00–09:04)
• Georgia is an Equitable Division State:
  Property is divided ‘fairly’, usually meaning 50/50, and adultery rarely shifts this.
  “Even things like adultery don’t necessarily affect that 50/50 division.” – Evan (09:22)

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7. Evidence, Privacy, and Recordings (10:08–11:46)

• Proving Adultery:
  “Ultimately, what you need to do is prove to the court that adultery is going on. And it sounds like you’ve gotten way more than enough evidence…” – Evan (10:43)
• Recording Laws:
  • You may only record conversations you’re part of, without notifying the other party.
  • Recording calls between your spouse and a third party is illegal if you’re not involved.

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8. Spouses Withholding Money or Property, and Pro Se Divorce (11:51–13:56)

• When Left With Nothing:
  Even if a spouse tries to withhold money, assets, or access, you still have rights.
  “You definitely do. I mean, you said you have an attorney…” – Evan (12:28)
• Dissatisfaction With Your Attorney:
  “If your attorney’s telling you he’s not gonna fight for you, you probably need to talk to a different attorney.” – Evan (12:50)
• What If You Can’t Afford an Attorney?
  Many counties provide step-by-step forms (often online and free); representing yourself (pro se) is increasingly accessible.
  “Most of the courts have really stepped up on trying to make sure…they’re making that stuff accessible without having to hire an attorney.” – Evan (13:06)

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9. Delays & Attorney Concerns (13:56–15:15)

• Are Attorneys Dragging Out Cases?
  Evan suggests delays are rarely attorney-driven for billing purposes; more often, the bottleneck is the court schedule.
  “Plenty of work out there for divorce attorneys…so the odds of stalling out a case purely so they can bill hours—probably pretty slim.” – Evan (14:11)
• Communication is Key:
  “Talk to the attorney about it. That’s the number one thing. I think a lot of clients are just scared to talk to their attorneys.” – Evan (14:34)
• Change Attorneys if Dissatisfied:
  If after talking it turns out the attorney’s the issue, Evan advises to “go [to] a different attorney.” – (15:14)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On post-holiday divorces:
  "Everybody makes it through the holidays and then the phone starts ringing." – Evan (00:42)
• On condonation:
  “If that behavior has been forgiven by your spouse…you can’t later raise that as an issue as the cause of the divorce.” – Evan (02:08)
• On representing yourself:
  “Most of the courts have really stepped up on trying to make sure…they’re making that stuff accessible without having to hire an attorney.” – Evan (13:06)
• On attorney delays:
  “There’s plenty of work out there for divorce attorneys…the odds of a divorce attorney stalling out a case purely so they can bill hours—probably pretty slim.” – Evan (14:11)

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Timestamps for Key Topics

• 00:36 – Post-holiday divorce surge
• 01:12 – Infidelity/alimony laws in Georgia
• 03:31 – Rehab (short-term) vs. lifetime alimony
• 04:31 – How to start divorce & need for both spouses’ consent
• 06:39 – Legitimation of children after marriage
• 07:27 – Adultery’s effect on property/custody rights
• 10:08 – Proving infidelity, privacy laws for recordings
• 11:51 – What if your spouse withholds assets post-separation?
• 13:06 – Pro se (do-it-yourself) divorce resources
• 13:56 – Attorney delays and client communication

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Conclusion

This episode delivers a fast-paced, information-rich Q&A with practical, Georgia-specific divorce advice — covering everything from adultery and alimony to representing yourself. Evan Summerstein’s legal insight offers clarity for those at any stage of the divorce process, while the hosts provide their signature levity throughout.

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Transcript

[A]

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[B]

Spin Quest is a free to play social casino void where prohibited. Visit spinquest.com for more details. The Burt Show Evan Summerstein joins us. How are you this morning?

[C]

I am doing great. Good morning.

[B]

Evan is our divorce attorney here. This is the time of year, right? I mean, everybody's been holding out.

[C]

Everybody makes it through the holidays and then the phone starts ringing.

[B]

Do you get it? Like right on January 2nd are the voicemails, Are you at full capacity when you go into the office, get back

[C]

in the office after the vacation? Yeah.

[D]

When you have accountants that have tax season.

[B]

Well, this is like Evans, like Super bowl.

[E]

Right?

[C]

This would be the divorce season, no doubt season.

[B]

And we can use the voice disguiser on you guys. Also, is there anything, was there anything to holding out till the new year to file any advantage of holding out to 2010 rather than being it in 2020?

[F]

You mean like a tax, like a tax break?

[B]

Yeah, or something like that.

[C]

Yeah, I guess the last minute Christmas presents.

[B]

But outside of that, legally, nothing.

[C]

No, nothing. Yeah. Technically you have to be married on January 1st or actually December 31st to file jointly for the previous year.

[B]

Okay. So if you're having a problem with your divorce right now or you've been thinking about it strongly and you haven't even started yet, then give Evan here a call and we'll hook you up. 404741, Q100. Hey, Amy, you're on the voice disguiser.

[G]

Hey there. I have a quick question about the rules of alimony and infidelity in Georgia. If you can prove infidelity, do you have to pay alimony?

[C]

Under Georgia law, adultery is a bar to alimony. So if the divorce, if the cause of the divorce is adultery, then that would stop you from being able to receive alimony.

[G]

Okay, so if you are in a relationship and the adultery was a few years back, does that nullify that cause?

[C]

Well, Georgia has something called condonation. So if that behavior has been forgiven by your spouse and you guys have tried to move on and reconciled after the fact, then you can't later raise that as an issue as the cause of the divorce. So it wouldn't be a bar at that point.

[B]

So what's the timeline on that, though? So let's say Stacey comes home, she screws around on me. We try to make it work. I try to make it work as hard as I. I've tried everything. It takes me a year to realize that it's not gonna work.

[C]

I don't think there's any real timeline. What it really comes down to is, did you guys reconcile or not? I mean, did you get back to, did you get past it? Did you forgive her for her behavior? And then, in essence, what the judge says is, look, you forgave her. Why should I not forgive her for the same behavior?

[B]

There's such a gray area, though. Like, if I stick around that long, then.

[C]

And you're still trying to forgive just

[B]

to say that I forget. Yeah, I'm still forgiving.

[C]

Yeah.

[D]

That's why you need a good attorney.

[B]

Right. That's why I'm calling Evan. All right, Amy, thank you. Bye. Bye. And I think sometimes people tune into the show and they only hear half a conversation. They just heard that Stacey screwed around on me. She did not. I was using that as an example.

[D]

That was a hypothetical.

[B]

Kelly, you were on the voice disguiser.

[G]

Hi, I was just calling because my husband and I have been together for about four years, and I've been in school for about five years, and I was just wondering, if I hadn't been employed, is there a way I can get alimony since he's been our sole source of income?

[C]

Georgia does have alimony. And what you most commonly see nowadays is what's called rehabilitative alimony, which is kind of a short term alimony for a specific purpose. So that would kind of be a situation where he may help you, the court may ask him to help you get back on your feet after the. After the divorce. So to help you get into an apartment or a house and help you pay the bills as you're getting started.

[D]

But you're not going to be taken care of for an extended period of time.

[C]

No, you know, I mean, that traditional.

[D]

No matter how rich he is, right?

[C]

Yeah. I mean, that traditional idea of kind of permanent alimony, lifetime alimonyou don't see it much anymore. I mean, you do in very traditional situations where people have been married for 35 years and one of the spouses hasn't worked that entire period. Well, then, yeah, you may be buying on for a lifetime, but especially in a short term marriage. You said you had been married for four years. Definitely not a long term alimony. Situation.

[B]

Here is Kim. She wants to be on the voice disguiser. Hey, Kim. You are on with Evan Summerstein from Hunter Weinstein and Summerstein.

[G]

Yes. Hi. Good morning.

[C]

Morning.

[G]

I have, I think, a pretty tough situation because my husband and I have four children, and they range from the ages of eight to a year and a half. And I have been wanting to divorce him for several reasons, one of which is alcoholism. And he just doesn't want to. He doesn't want to do it. He says that it's important for us to be together for the children, which I don't agree to just because of the situation that we're in. And I really don't know how to go about it. What? I'm just at a loss. I don't know what to do.

[C]

A lot of people call my office and they just have no idea how to get started. Or people call my office and say, I told my husband or wife I want a divorce and they won't give me a divorce. Nowadays it only takes one person to get divorced. The best way to start is contact an attorney. Talk to them about what the first steps would be. There's some great information that you can find online also Fulton county, for instance, even if you're not in Fulton county, great information. On their website, I think the address is www.fultonfamilydivision.com. they have forms and all kinds of information on how you'd actually get started on a divorce. The best way to go is just contact an attorney, talk to your friends, and see who. Who they've been represented by if they've been through a divorce. And an attorney can tell you how you get started with the entire process.

[B]

Theoretically, could you get a divorce without ever getting a signature from the other party?

[C]

Sure. There's a couple situations. One, if you don't know where they're located, if you can't find them, you tried to find them, you can actually get divorced without ever talking to them or seeing them when they do what's called a divorce by publication. But, yeah, you don't ever need their consent. I mean, you'd file the complaint with the court and the sheriff would deliver the papers to them. They don't need to sign to say that they've actually received the papers. And then ultimately, if you went to a trial in front of a judge, if they didn't show up, you win. Pretty easy, I guess.

[B]

Did you get what you need there, Kim?

[G]

I guess so, yeah. I'll look it up online. And thank you.

[C]

Sure.

[B]

Bye.

[E]

Bye.

[B]

Here is Ryan Good morning. You are on the voice disguiser.

[G]

I was calling to see I was married after I had children. Do I still need to get my children legitimized, or did that happen when we got married?

[C]

You later married the mother of your children, correct?

[E]

I have two children.

[C]

Under Georgia law, you would be legally recognized as their father if you do later marry their mother.

[G]

Okay, thank you so much.

[B]

Sure. Bye. Bye. These are simple today, man. We're rattling through these, dude. Not a lot of excuses. Normally we get the whole story and then the question, yeah, people are ready.

[F]

It's after the holidays. They've had two solid weeks with the person they hate. They're like, you don't need the backstory. I hate them. How do I get rid of them? I don't even want to see them. Can I fold it in a paper airplane and throw it through the window?

[B]

Hey, Stephanie. Good morning. You're on the voice disguiser.

[G]

Hi. I have a question. I was married for seven years, and I asked for a divorce two years ago, and I met someone about three months after that. We're still not divorced. We're separated. And what I understand, legally separated. He. I left our house and was staying with friends. And so I'm curious. If he says, I don't get anything, I don't get the house because I'm an adulterer. And I'm wondering if that is the case.

[C]

Well, I mean, technically, the definition of adultery is having sexual intercourse outside of your marriage. But as far as a divorce goes, that adultery has to be the cause of the divorce itself. And if you could go into court and prove that you were already out of the marriage, you had told him you wanted a divorce before for that, and that the adultery is not the cause of the divorce itself, then it's not really that much of an issue. If you were to prove that, then it wouldn't even be a bar to the alimony that we talked about before.

[G]

Okay. Okay. So right now, he illegally has everything, all of my furniture, all my belongings. And he says that because of what, being in a relationship now, I don't have any access to any of that or the house or anything. And that he can prove that even

[C]

if there's total uncondoned adultery, that that doesn't really affect your rights to a division of marital property. That only really affects the rights as far as. As far as the alimony goes, you don't give up rights to, you know, ownership of the house or ownership or any of the property that you guys may have together.

[G]

Okay? That includes kids, too.

[C]

That would definitely include the kids, too.

[E]

Yes.

[G]

Okay, great.

[B]

Okay. I'm getting. I'm getting a little bit of a mixed message here, or maybe I'm interpreting it the wrong way, because I always thought you said before when you were in here talking about divorce, that in the eyes of the Georgia courts, that adultery, they don't really take that into consideration. But I'm hearing a little something different today.

[C]

Well, no, really, there's two. When you look at divorce, there's two big areas that you'd look at as far as support and that kind of thing goes. One is support alimony, and the other is division of property. If the divorce is based on adultery and that's the grounds for the divorce, then that would be a bar to receiving alimony. When you're talking about the division of property itself, what you guys have accumulated during the course of the marriage, the adultery probably doesn't have that big of an effect on how that property is going to be divided. I see Georgia is what's called an equitable division state, which means the court's supposed to divide that marital property fairly. Typically, you're going to see more or less a 50, 50 division when you walk into court, and even things like adultery don't necessarily affect that 50, 50 division.

[B]

Okay, and here is Tom, who wants to be on the voice disguiser. Hey, Tom. Divorce advice from Evan Summerstein.

[E]

Hey. What it is, I've caught my wife having several affairs. I've already filed for divorce. I had hired a private investigator and got a lot of video of her and a couple of guys together, and, you know, couldn't afford to keep the private investigator going. But their. Their relationships are still ongoing. And I'm wondering if it would help my case to continue to video or audio through the phone or through a videotape them together?

[B]

Good question.

[C]

Really. I mean, ultimately, what you need to do is prove to the court that adultery is going on. And it sounds like you've gotten way more than enough evidence of the fact that the adultery is going on. Also, you need to be really careful. Taping the laws in Georgia on tape. Recording phone calls is very, very strict. You are allowed to tape record any conversation that you're a party to, and you don't have to let the other side know. But if you're not part of that conversation, for instance, if you're tape recording your w talking to a boyfriend, that is completely illegal.

[F]

So how much of the conversation do you have to be a part of? Like, if she's talking to the boyfriend. Can you just run into the room and go, hi, Ma, and run out? And then. Are you part of it?

[C]

No, you'd have to be part of the conversation between the phone. You'd have to be on that phone or tape record it.

[F]

That'd be awkward.

[B]

That's something that we got to store in the back of our heads, though. So we could do those. We can record those calls and not need their permission. So long as we're on.

[F]

No.

[B]

Broadcasting is a little bit different. Much different. Okay, yeah, nice try. Give me a reason.

[D]

Broadcasting them later comes with other restrictions.

[B]

All right, here is one last call. Hey, Willow. Good morning. You are on the Voice Disguiser with Evan Summerstein.

[G]

Hi. I have a husband that cheated on me, left me high and dry, took all the money, closed the credit card down, left me with no car. I was in the hospital and almost died on last Christmas. He didn't come there. He had sent up over 40 grand in debt and is accusing me of it. And it's not mine. My attorney's not fighting for me, and he's saying that I won't get alimony. He doesn't want to give me anything. Do I have any rights?

[C]

Yeah. First of all, it doesn't sound like a great husband.

[B]

That's why she's spitting.

[C]

Yeah, you definitely do. I mean, you said that you have an attorney.

[G]

I do. And he told me that he wasn't gonna fight for me. Well, his paralegal told me that he wasn't gonna fight for me in court against the money that he has racked up. I mean, he racked up over 40 grand, and none of that is my money. And he's trying to charge me back for my medical that the judge in the temporary hearing said that he had to pay.

[C]

Well, I would just start off with the idea that if your attorney's telling you he's not gonna fight for you, you probably need to talk to a different attorney.

[G]

I know, but I don't have any money. Cause I don't work for medical conditions.

[B]

As a sidebar, like, what do you do if you want to get divorced and you have no cash?

[C]

Most of the courts have really stepped up on trying to make sure. It's what's called pro se, is when you represent yourself. And there's been a lot of articles written lately on pro se, people going forward with divorces. Because of the economy, people aren't able to hire attorneys right now. So the courts have taken a lot of steps to make sure that people can do that on their Own. And most of that is on the web. I mean, if you do a search for the county itself, and I'm not talking about doing, like, legal zoom, where you're paying for stuff. I'm talking about free information that's out there that the courts themselves are putting out. When I talked about the Fulton County Family Division, there's forms on there for complaints, for divorce settlement agreements. There's an instruction form that tells you, fill in these blanks, and here's exactly the steps you have to take to do it on your own so that they're making that stuff accessible without having to hire an attorney.

[F]

And you give away a free divorce to every 10th caller to your office.

[C]

Right.

[D]

My question about somebody who. Because I've had a couple of friends that have dealt with this, they've hired attorneys who started off great, but are stalling the process and making it take a really long time to finish the divorce, because the more hours they log, then the more money they make.

[C]

Sure.

[D]

And they know that that's what's going on. Is there anything. Is there anything they can do to speed up the process with their own attorney?

[C]

There definitely is. I mean, first of all, whether it sounds good or bad, there's plenty of work out there for divorce attorneys. So the odds of a divorce attorney stalling out a case purely so they can bill hours, probably pretty slim.

[D]

Okay, so there's probably the client's perception

[C]

of what's going on. Yeah, it doesn't look that way. I mean, so talk to the attorney about it. I mean, that's the number one thing. I think a lot of clients are just scared to talk to their attorneys. If you feel like that's going on or your case isn't moving, call your attorney. Schedule time to go in. Not over the phone. Go in and sit down with them and say, look, explain to me why this is taking so long, what's going on here. I mean, part of the problem sometimes is you're waiting for a court date. It can take 45 days to 3, 4 months to actually get on a court calendar and get your case to be heard nowadays. So sometimes that may be the cause for the delay. It could be the attorney's fault. So it's really a matter of figuring out what the reason is for that delay. And if the fault is if the problem is the attorney, then go a different attorney.

[B]

If you don't know where to start, we're giving you a place right here. Evan Summerstein. Just go to our website. We have a link on over to Hunter Weinstein and Summerstein, and you can get in touch with them that way. Thanks, Evan.

[C]

Thanks guys.

[B]

I know you're busy. Very, very, very busy right now. So thanks for your time.

[C]

Good to see y'. All.

[B]

Appreciate it.

[H]

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