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Burt (Host)
The Burt Show Some friend of Burt's I think or something was telling him and Stacey a story and blah blah, blah. And then it turned out in the relationship there was a gray area like the guy or the girl was like, should I stay with him? Because I mean, they didn't do anything that bad, but this is what they did and it seems kind of weird. So I don't know if I should break up with him. And you know, when the area's gray like that, there's a lot of different levels like how long have you been together? You know, do you really, do you think this is the one? And blah blah, blah. So they were trying to evaluate all that and Burt decided that would be a great segment for the show. We'll act as judge and jury. You bring us your gray area, you bring us your confusion, and we will evaluate do you stop dating that person?
Co-host 1 (Possibly Female)
Okay.
Burt (Host)
And so that's what we're doing right now. You're more than welcome to join in. 404-741-Q100. Hey, Whitney.
Caller Whitney
Hi.
Burt (Host)
Welcome to the bird show.
Co-host 2 (Possibly Female)
Thank you.
Burt (Host)
We are ready to tell you if you should stop dating the guy.
Caller Whitney
Okay. Well, this happened a few weeks ago.
Burt (Host)
Okay.
Caller Whitney
I actually, it was a Friday night, I decided to stay in and my boyfriend, I called him and we just hadn't spoken that evening. Well, at about 5:30 in the morning, I get a phone call and I didn't answer because I shut my phone off while it was him leaving a voicemail saying that he's really sorry he didn't call me back, that, you know, he had fallen asleep and he was really sorry. So I thought nothing of it and got up the next day. And about six hours later he called me back and said, you know, hey babe, you know, I need to tell you something. I did. I went out last night and I didn't think that you would want to know about or I didn't want to tell you because I thought you'd get upset because of the people I was going out with. And I was a little bit caught off guard because I didn't know that he had gone out in the first place. And I was a little thrown off
Co-host 2 (Possibly Female)
by the fact that he would lie to me.
Burt (Host)
But he lied to you, then he corrected the lie within a few hours, yes. And who was he going out with that would have bothered you?
Caller Whitney
It was just one of his guy friends who was single and he was somewhat of a ladies man, I guess.
Co-host 3 (Possibly Female)
Were any of his like old girlfriends or girls involved in it at all?
Caller Whitney
No. Nobody? No. Well, not that I know.
Burt (Host)
I'll give you my perspective. The girls might have a different perspective, but from my perspective, I think the fact that he came back 12 hours later and told you the truth is actually a good sign because it means he wasn't comfortable telling you a little white lie. So I would actually look at that. And if you really like this guy, this is going to be the only piece of advice you listen to because I'm saying something good. But I think the fact that he, he fixed it in a fairly short amount of time is a good thing. Unless he realized that he ran into someone that you guys mutually know.
Co-host 3 (Possibly Female)
Right. Exactly what I was thinking.
Burt (Host)
Then he's covering his bases.
Caller Whitney
Yeah.
Co-host 4 (Possibly Male)
Because he did call you at 5:30 in the morning. Which means he didn't get home until 5:30 in the morning. So he was out until 5:30 with somebody and something.
Burt (Host)
Ah, details. Why are you women always so observant?
Co-host 3 (Possibly Female)
Well, and that was the thing. I was thinking. He was piecing back together the night and thinking, oh my gosh, I ran into her friends.
Burt (Host)
I ran into Melissa and Katie. Joan. Oh my God, when they get to the office, they're going to tell blah, blah, blah.
Co-host 3 (Possibly Female)
Right. I think, I think he was sort of covering his butt and I think, why would he have a problem telling you he was out with one of his guy friends if there weren't other women involved?
Co-host 2 (Possibly Female)
Hmm.
Caller Whitney
I don't know.
Co-host 2 (Possibly Female)
I guess I'm just.
Caller Whitney
I'm. I'm just more worried about, like. Okay, well, if you can lie to me about that now, like, and you can, and you can call and leave a voicemail on my phone, you know, lying to me, like, is that gonna be an issue later?
Burt (Host)
How long have you guys been together? Only a few months, in my opinion. Yes. You should stop dating them. It's only. You only have a couple months invested. Yeah, the fact that like a couple months into it, he shouldn't be uncomfortable telling you about any guy that he's.
Co-host 1 (Possibly Female)
But I would get it, but I don't know, I would get in. I would dig deep into it, you know, like have a conversation with him about, you know, kind of nip it in the bud if you want to continue the relationship. Talk about how uncomfortable you were with him lying and, and demand the truth.
Burt (Host)
Jen.
Co-host 3 (Possibly Female)
I say move on.
Burt (Host)
Melissa.
Co-host 1 (Possibly Female)
I still say have a conversation with him and give him one more chance.
Burt (Host)
Wendell.
Co-host 4 (Possibly Male)
I say let it go.
Burt (Host)
3. Dump them. 1. Hang on. Okay, good luck with that.
Caller Whitney
Thanks.
Co-host 3 (Possibly Female)
What's the official title of this segment is Should I Still Date Him?
Burt (Host)
Okay, we need a catchy alliteration radio name so we can make a jingle for it.
Co-host 3 (Possibly Female)
Okay.
Burt (Host)
Hey, Wendy, Angela here needs to be on the voice disguiser. Hey, Angela, you are voice disguised.
Co-host 2 (Possibly Female)
Great.
Caller with bad breath issue
Okay.
Burt (Host)
All right, your question. Should I dump this guy? What has he done?
Caller with bad breath issue
He has bad breath. I mean, you know, really bad breath.
Co-host 1 (Possibly Female)
Like medical bed breath.
Caller with bad breath issue
Well, you know, at first I thought it was medical bad breath, but the more, you know, I got into him, I don't think. I mean, I think it's his hygiene altogether, you know, I mean, like, he told me he didn't smoke cigarettes. And, you know, one day we were just like laying around and I was trying to figure out where this smell was coming from, and it was coming from his mouth, you know, and so I kind of got an attitude. And he goes, well, what's wrong? And I'm like, well, your breast smells horrible.
Caller Mike
And.
Caller with bad breath issue
And he goes, oh, I'm sorry. I'm offending you. And I said, well, I have some extra toothbrushes in there. He goes, oh, well, I don't use that type of toothbrush. I mean, so, like, what type of toothbrush do you use? Do you use a toothbrush? You know, and then he jumps up and he gets the toothbrush, and, you know, it still didn't make a bit of difference. And the next time, you know, we
Co-host 2 (Possibly Female)
were together, he had, like.
Caller with bad breath issue
It was like, a musty body odor, you know, just, like. It wasn't really, like, extreme stench, but, you know, he smelled kind of sweaty or whatever.
Burt (Host)
Now, I know people are gonna. Yeah, people are gonna call up with all these medical issues.
Co-host 1 (Possibly Female)
Well, how long have y' all been dating for?
Caller with bad breath issue
About three months.
Co-host 1 (Possibly Female)
See, this is. He's putting his best foot forward. This is what Bert would say is, like, he's giving you his best.
Burt (Host)
Best effort in the first year.
Co-host 1 (Possibly Female)
Yeah.
Burt (Host)
Unless. Well, people. 100 people are gonna call up and go, it's medical. It's meta. Could be medical.
Caller with bad breath issue
Let me tell you more. Okay. I mean, I've just come up with that. He's just not a clean person. Oh, you know. Oh, yeah, yeah. You know, like, he came. He came over to spend the night or whatever, and he only a shirt to change it. And I'm like, well, wear your, you know, your underwear, your pants. Well, I'm just gonna change shirts. I think you go to work the
Co-host 4 (Possibly Male)
next day, you kind of already convinced yourself.
Burt (Host)
Yep. You know the answer.
Co-host 3 (Possibly Female)
And I think if you.
Co-host 2 (Possibly Female)
If you.
Co-host 3 (Possibly Female)
You've already brought it to his attention with the breath thing and with the not bringing a clean pair of draws thing and whatever it is, like, you've already brought it to his attention, and nothing's changed.
Caller with bad breath issue
So what do you guys.
Co-host 2 (Possibly Female)
What.
Caller with bad breath issue
Nothing has really changed?
Burt (Host)
Well, dump him. You only got.
Caller with bad breath issue
What do you guys think?
Burt (Host)
Dump him. You got 90 days in it. It's not. I think.
Co-host 3 (Possibly Female)
Well, the one thing I will say is I think it's worth a conversation, an honest conversation where you're not accusing him, like, kind of like Will said for the last one. Because I think this is something he can change. You know, like, if the guy before is, like, lying and running around and whatever and just trying to cover his butt, I'm not sure he can change that. But, like, I mean, this guy could brush his teeth and Listerine more. He could go to the dentist and fix the bad tooth. He could, you know, shower it up more and buy in some body scrub.
Co-host 1 (Possibly Female)
But he would be doing that.
Co-host 3 (Possibly Female)
He would be doing that already. But it's changeable, you know, it's easily
Caller with bad breath issue
changed in this apartment for two years. And he's only vacuumed his floors, like, twice.
Co-host 3 (Possibly Female)
Hell, no.
Burt (Host)
Bye.
Co-host 1 (Possibly Female)
Bye. See, because the thing is.
Co-host 3 (Possibly Female)
Never mind.
Co-host 1 (Possibly Female)
I think that if he's not trying to impress her now, he never will. And he'll expect her to do all the cleaning if they got together.
Co-host 3 (Possibly Female)
True.
Burt (Host)
Paul just named our segment. Hey, Paul.
Caller Mike
Hey. How's it going? A little surprised, man, that you didn't catch the obvious here.
Burt (Host)
What do you got?
Caller Mike
You just gotta call it, Should I stay or Should I go? You know, should I stay or should I go?
Burt (Host)
Brilliant. And next time we do, we'll have the song handy. Awesome. Paul gets naming rights for that. That'll earn you.
Co-host 3 (Possibly Female)
Good job, Paul.
Burt (Host)
You can listen to the show for the rest of the day absolutely free.
Co-host 3 (Possibly Female)
You just got the golden gobble and you don't know what that is, but you have.
Burt (Host)
Hey, Mary. Welcome to the show. Oh, voice disguiser from Mary. Hi, Mary. Hey, what's going on?
Co-host 2 (Possibly Female)
My fiance and I, we've been engaged now for a while. It's a long engagement. And one night we were sleeping and I awoke to him groping me in a very intimate way. And he assumed that I was sleeping. And let's see.
Burt (Host)
Was he awake?
Co-host 2 (Possibly Female)
He was fully awake.
Co-host 1 (Possibly Female)
And he knew you were asleep?
Co-host 2 (Possibly Female)
He knew that I was asleep and I pretended to go along with it just to see what he was going to do. And let's just say it wasn't above the waist. Groping below the waist.
Burt (Host)
And do you think maybe he was just hoping that you guys could wake
Co-host 3 (Possibly Female)
up and have a little in the middle of the night thing?
Burt (Host)
Could have a little midnight delight?
Co-host 2 (Possibly Female)
What bothered me about it was that he didn't seem to be interested in waking me up. That didn't sit well with me.
Co-host 3 (Possibly Female)
Is this activities you guys had participated in before, in waking hours?
Co-host 2 (Possibly Female)
No, seldom, but not that often. I guess the thing that stood out in my mind was that he didn't seem like he was interested in waking me up. He was okay with me being asleep. And.
Co-host 3 (Possibly Female)
And this was stuff you hadn't done before?
Co-host 2 (Possibly Female)
No.
Co-host 3 (Possibly Female)
So he was trying to get somewhere while you were asleep that you wouldn't have let him go when you're awake? That's what I'm trying to establish.
Co-host 2 (Possibly Female)
Um, no, it's, you know, it, it was just regular. It would have been regular run of the meal stuff if I was awake.
Co-host 1 (Possibly Female)
Oh, I just, I still think there's a part of me that. He was trying to wake you up.
Burt (Host)
Yeah, that's not. I don't think that's an unusual male activity. Positive. You know what? I'm positive.
Co-host 3 (Possibly Female)
Yeah. We're after 8:30, so this is the more adult portion of the show. Middle of the night, nookie is normal.
Co-host 1 (Possibly Female)
Surprise, wake up.
Co-host 3 (Possibly Female)
Surprise, wake up. But if you're concerned he was trying to cross a line you wouldn't let him cross when you're awake, then I understand the disturbing part of it.
Co-host 1 (Possibly Female)
Have you talked to him about it?
Co-host 2 (Possibly Female)
I don't know if had. Had he woke me up and asked me and he might have felt, and I don't know if I can say that I would have said it, but he might have felt like I would
Co-host 1 (Possibly Female)
have said, no, you're engaged and he should have woken you up and asked you permission to start something.
Co-host 4 (Possibly Male)
Yeah, I think she was awake.
Co-host 2 (Possibly Female)
It would have been okay if he had woke me up, but it seemed like he was just.
Co-host 4 (Possibly Male)
You were awake.
Co-host 2 (Possibly Female)
He was. I was, but he didn't know.
Co-host 3 (Possibly Female)
He thought she was.
Co-host 2 (Possibly Female)
So when I played along just to see what he was going to do. So, yes, I was awake to see what he was going to do, and he kept on. And then when I woke up and I said, what were you doing? Why? If it was okay, if it was something you didn't think was out of the ordinary, he apologized about it, and I didn't even ask for an apology. He just kept saying, oh, I'm so sorry. And I feel so embarrassed.
Co-host 1 (Possibly Female)
Well, it's probably based on your reaction.
Co-host 3 (Possibly Female)
What are you doing?
Co-host 1 (Possibly Female)
He's like, oh, I'm sorry.
Burt (Host)
I don't think you need to break up with him, but I think you need to have a discussion about your intimate life. Because I am fairly certain that for some guys, they might find it acceptable to attempt to wake up the woman in their bed that way in hopes of engaging in further activities. And the guy would not find it offensive at all unless the girl woke up really offended. So I do think you owe it to yourself and to him to have
Co-host 3 (Possibly Female)
a conversation, especially if you're engaged.
Burt (Host)
If you're engaged.
Co-host 1 (Possibly Female)
I don't know.
Burt (Host)
I just like, let's combine the segment we did earlier. Like, if he called up for am I normal? I would say yes, you are.
Co-host 3 (Possibly Female)
I would say yes.
Co-host 1 (Possibly Female)
Because it's not just guys that try that yeah. No. Yeah. If you're engaged and he has to.
Caller with bad breath issue
Yeah.
Co-host 1 (Possibly Female)
If he has to wake you up to ask your permission to try to start something, then I question the relationship.
Co-host 3 (Possibly Female)
Sometimes that's a nice surprise, to be woken up in that way. Well, how are you?
Co-host 1 (Possibly Female)
Yeah, I think that question's a relationship.
Burt (Host)
Let me call you a wrecker. No.
Caller with bad breath issue
No need to.
Caller Mike
Hi.
Burt (Host)
I don't have a phone.
Co-host 3 (Possibly Female)
Okay.
Burt (Host)
I'm the voice disguiser from Mike. Hey, Mike.
Caller Mike
Hey.
Burt (Host)
Hey.
Caller Mike
So we've been together a little over two years, and for the last year and a half, there's been no action.
Co-host 1 (Possibly Female)
Okay.
Co-host 4 (Possibly Male)
Like anything.
Burt (Host)
Are you only trying to get at her in the middle of the night?
Co-host 3 (Possibly Female)
Because she doesn't like that she just called a few minutes ago. She's wondering the same thing.
Caller Mike
It's not like. But everything else is perfectly fine. Perfectly fine. Everything else.
Co-host 3 (Possibly Female)
Wait a second. How long have y' all been together? Total?
Caller Mike
Two and a half years.
Co-host 3 (Possibly Female)
Two and a half years? You've been living together for two of them, but you only were doing it for the first year and for the last year and a half you stopped doing it?
Caller Mike
Yes.
Co-host 3 (Possibly Female)
And are you doing anything else other than it?
Caller Mike
Just normal stuff. I mean, and nothing other than that. Everything else is fine.
Co-host 3 (Possibly Female)
Okay. Everything's not fine.
Burt (Host)
Your relationship is fine, but you're just not being intimate.
Caller Mike
Correct.
Co-host 1 (Possibly Female)
Have y' all talked about this?
Caller Mike
Yes. She thinks it's perfectly normal.
Co-host 3 (Possibly Female)
She's your roommate, not your girlfriend.
Burt (Host)
She's wrong.
Caller Mike
Well, that's what I said, but, yeah, that's how it is.
Co-host 3 (Possibly Female)
Does she have any sort of, like, medical problem or anything like that in the area?
Caller Mike
I mean, I don't know.
Co-host 3 (Possibly Female)
Why accent down there in the certain vicinity.
Co-host 1 (Possibly Female)
If this was a guy, if this is a girl calling about a guy, we'd automatically say he's cheating. So what are your feelings on her cheating on you?
Caller Mike
I hadn't thought about it.
Burt (Host)
It might be.
Co-host 1 (Possibly Female)
You have not thought about your girlfriend and you have not had sex in a year and a half and you haven't thought about her being with somebody else?
Caller Mike
I had. I hadn't really.
Burt (Host)
It might be a double standard, but my first thought is she's just not into you like you guys.
Co-host 3 (Possibly Female)
My first thought is she's just not into sex, period.
Burt (Host)
Or. Or sex with him.
Caller Mike
That's not the case.
Co-host 4 (Possibly Male)
Well, they did it for her entire.
Co-host 1 (Possibly Female)
Wait a second. It's not the case that she's not into sex?
Caller Mike
Yeah. That's not the case.
Co-host 2 (Possibly Female)
Why?
Caller Mike
Because she was into the first year?
Burt (Host)
Yeah. Here's my Thing is, I.
Co-host 3 (Possibly Female)
Then she is doing it with somebody else.
Burt (Host)
I didn't. Not necessarily. She could just be over him. She could be a year. He could be a friend. Yeah. Girls can. People can go a year without having sex if she's thinking no.
Co-host 1 (Possibly Female)
Well, I know. I agree with Jeff that people can, but not while they're in a relationship.
Co-host 3 (Possibly Female)
Not while they're living with somebody.
Burt (Host)
I don't think she's living with. I think she has a roommate. I think she's got a best friend who hangs out with her and buys her dinner and they hang out together.
Co-host 3 (Possibly Female)
It's a problem that she's not attracted to Mike.
Burt (Host)
She's not into it. She may or may not be having a relationship outside of it, but I think you should dump her because she's. I just don't think she's into it. Regardless of whether or not there's somebody
Co-host 3 (Possibly Female)
on the side, it's obviously bothering you. I mean, do you want to go the rest of your life without doing it? Doing it?
Caller Mike
I don't know. I love her, but I mean, yeah.
Co-host 1 (Possibly Female)
I mean, a woman can go, you know, longer, I think, than a guy, but not in a relationship. Living together for a year and a half. Like, it just. Yeah, I think there's an issue. There's a problem. It's not.
Burt (Host)
Okay.
Caller Mike
All right, well, thanks.
Co-host 3 (Possibly Female)
I mean, we say if you should say or should you go, go.
Co-host 1 (Possibly Female)
I say go.
Co-host 3 (Possibly Female)
Wendy, go.
Co-host 4 (Possibly Male)
Have a conversation first.
Burt (Host)
Jeff, go. Bye. Bye.
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Episode: Vault: Listeners Ask If It’s Time to Break Up
Air Date: June 11, 2026
Hosts: Bert, Kristin, Abby, Cassie, Tommy, and the Bert Show Cast
This episode centers around relationship “gray areas” where listeners call in to ask the panel whether their current situations are dealbreakers—or if there’s still hope for their relationships. The hosts, in their trademark candid, humorous, and supportive style, act as judge and jury, offering perspectives and advice on various listener dilemmas, with each scenario sparking lively debate.
“I think the fact that he came back 12 hours later and told you the truth is actually a good sign because it means he wasn’t comfortable telling you a little white lie.” (Bert, [03:53])
“He's giving you his best… Best effort in the first year.” (Bert & Co-host, [07:44])
“Hell, no.” (Co-host, [09:17]) “Bye.” (Bert, [09:18])
“You just gotta call it ‘Should I Stay or Should I Go?’ You know, should I stay or should I go?” ([09:35])
“I don't think that's an unusual male activity. … for some guys, they might find it acceptable to attempt to wake up the woman in their bed that way in hopes of engaging in further activities.” (Bert, [12:47])
“If you're engaged and he has to wake you up to ask your permission to try to start something, then I question the relationship.” (Co-host, [13:30])
“She’s your roommate, not your girlfriend.” (Co-host, [15:00])
“It’s a problem that she’s not attracted to Mike.” (Co-host, [16:31])
On lying early in a relationship:
“The fact that like a couple months into it, he shouldn’t be uncomfortable telling you about any guy that he’s [out with].” (Bert, [05:22])
On hygiene as a dealbreaker:
“If he’s not trying to impress her now, he never will.” (Co-host, [09:21])
Naming the segment:
“Should I Stay or Should I Go? Brilliant.” (Bert, [09:39])
Consent and trust in intimacy:
“If you're engaged and he has to wake you up to ask your permission to try to start something, then I question the relationship.” (Co-host, [13:30])
Roommate vs. romantic partner:
“She’s your roommate, not your girlfriend.” (Co-host, [15:00])
The episode blends humor, honesty, and empathy. The hosts make light of “gray areas,” but always circle back to the importance of communication, trust, and respecting boundaries. They encourage straightforward conversations in new relationships—and quick exits when red flags appear early on.
This episode delivers a rapid-fire series of real-life relationship situations, dissected by The Bert Show’s no-nonsense, witty panel. If you’re wondering what’s “normal,” or whether a seemingly small red flag should end a romance, their perspectives offer plenty to chew on—often with a laugh or two along the way.