Vault: Listeners call in about the dog thief

Summary

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The Bert Show: Vault – Listeners Call In About the Dog Thief (July 15, 2026)

Episode Overview

This episode of The Bert Show dives into a tangled web of listener drama centered on a man involved in emotional manipulation, deceit, and a memorable incident involving a dog thief. The hosts open up the phone lines to passionate listener calls and dissect harsh emails from the man at the center of it all. Throughout, the tone is animated, authentic, and peppered with humor as the cast relates their own takes on the unfolding situation, all while previewing more revelations to come.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

The Ongoing Drama: Unmasking the Manipulator

• The hosts revisit a story about a man who juggled multiple women and was involved in a dramatic breakup that escalated into community outrage.
• Debate centers on whether to post the man's photo online. Jeff expresses frustration that, despite his bad behavior, he may still get attention:
  • “We put his picture up online—even if there's a whole resume of psycho stuff going on, there's going to be a certain amount of women that are going to go, ‘I can fix him.’” — Jeff [01:25]
• Listeners and hosts lament that sharing his identity could inadvertently help him with new conquests, rather than warn others.

Listener Calls: Empathy and Outrage

• Alyssa calls in to share her perspective:
  • “This guy is insane… if he's a med student and he becomes a doctor, I do not want him anywhere near me.” — Alyssa [02:42]
• Jeff notes that many women have written in, empathizing because they've survived similar toxic dynamics—referring to such manipulators as “the dating Antichrist.” [03:05]
• The hosts address the cycle of emotional abuse and why people have a hard time breaking away from manipulative partners.
  • “You know they're not good for you… They're manipulating you. They border on abuse, if not abusing you.” — Jeff [03:20]
  • “Emotional abuse. Absolutely.” — Co-host 1 [03:29]

The "Dog Thief" and the Redneck Solution

• Melissa calls in asserting regional pride:
  • “US women up here, we don't waste time with our men. We get them in. Just like that.” — Melissa [03:47]
• The show jokes about how the “redneck way” would have resolved the dog theft quickly, adding levity to the tense conversation:
  • “That's great with the dog and everything, but if you did it the redneck way, that dog would have been back that night.” — Co-host 1 [03:57]

The Infamous Email: The Villain Responds

• Jeff reads an all-caps, angry email from the man at the center of the drama, highlighting his combative, arrogant attitude:
  • “I do not want anything to do with either of them anymore. Okay? So there's good news. There's good news. I can do better anyways and have done better since Friday night. They are both pathetic and want to make me look like the bad guy. If you do choose to read this message… be sure to tell them I can do better. And they really aren't that great anyways.” — Jeff reading the email [04:24]
• The cast responds with incredulity, mockery, and a bit of playground banter:
  • “Take that—your mama wears combat boots.” — Co-host 2 [04:57]
  • “Yeah, I could do better.” — Co-host 1 [04:59]
  • “Guess what? You're stupid.” — Co-host 2 [05:01]
• The crew expresses disbelief that someone in medical school would behave like this, “Grow up, Dr. Feel I. Psycho.” — Jeff [05:10]

What's Next: Teasing More Drama

• Jeff previews upcoming episodes with “Not so Psycho Sue” coming in-studio Monday and “Fiji” on Wednesday, promising more twists:
  • “That’s when the other shoe drops right there.” — Jeff [05:10]
• The hosts agree this is some of the most sensational material they've ever covered:
  • “No, no. This is the greatest story of all time on our show.” — Co-host 2 [05:30]

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Memorable Quotes & Moments

| Timestamp | Quote | Speaker | |-----------|-------|---------| | 01:25 | “We put his picture up online—even if there's a whole resume of psycho stuff going on, there's going to be a certain amount of women that are going to go, ‘I can fix him.’” | Jeff | | 02:42 | “This guy is insane… if he's a med student and he becomes a doctor, I do not want him anywhere near me.” | Listener Alyssa | | 03:20 | “You know they're not good for you… They're manipulating you. They border on abuse, if not abusing you.” | Jeff | | 04:24 | (reading email) “I do not want anything to do with either of them anymore. Okay? So there's good news. I can do better anyways and have done better since Friday night...” | Jeff | | 04:57 | “Take that—your mama wears combat boots.” | Co-host 2 | | 05:10 | “Grow up, Dr. Feel I. Psycho.” | Jeff | | 05:30 | “No, no. This is the greatest story of all time on our show.” | Co-host 2 |

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Noteworthy Segments & Timestamps

• [01:02] – First listener call: Melissa demands photo of the man be posted.
• [02:42] – Alyssa calls in, slamming the man's character, especially as a med student.
• [03:20] – Hosts dig into emotional abuse and manipulation.
• [03:47] – Listener Melissa evokes the “redneck” solution to the dog thief.
• [04:12-04:51] – Jeff reads the inflammatory email from the story’s antagonist.
• [05:23-05:30] – Hosts tease upcoming guests and future revelations.

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Tone & Language

• The language remains casual, direct, and often humorous.
• Hosts and callers alike display frustration, disbelief, and empathy.
• The banter between the cast injects playful mockery, reinforcing their real and relatable approach.

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For listeners new and old, this episode is a whirlwind of drama, humor, and reality-checks about toxic relationships—and it’s just the beginning. Not so Psycho Sue and Fiji are coming up, promising more to the saga.

Transcript

[Radio Host]

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[Jeff]

Refreshers contain caffeine. The bird show. I can tell you this. I will read some of the email that tool sent to us over the last 24 hours and I'll just read a couple of lines and I'll save the rest for Monday when not so Psycho sue is in studio and then Fiji is coming in on Wednesday.

[Co-host 1]

Okay.

[Co-host 2]

I cannot wait to meet her.

[Jeff]

She has got a story to tell. Both of them do. They're like, dudes, we just scratched the surface on this whole thing. So I'll read this. Just parts of this email coming up in just a couple of seconds. Good morning, Julie, you were on Q100.

[Melissa]

Hi, good morning.

[Jeff]

Good morning. How are you?

[Melissa]

You guys, I heard the other day the reason why you weren't going to put his picture online, you have to put his picture up.

[Jeff]

I am dying to. I am begging. I am begging the producers to let me put his picture up online.

[Melissa]

Crazy women want a following. That's fine like you said, but at least you're giving the nice girls a chance to stay away from him because he'll entangle somebody else.

[Jeff]

Well, Melissa and Jen, somehow Melissa and Jen made the point that, you know, there are women that are attracted to any kind of guy. So the fact that this dude is a good looking guy, both women have said that at one point, he's a good looking guy. We put his picture up online. Even if there's a whole resume of psycho stuff going on, there's going to be a certain amount of women that are going to go, I can fix him and they're going to find out who he is.

[Co-host 1]

We end up helping him out.

[Melissa]

Each to their own kind. You know that. At least we know there's some kind of filter there.

[Co-host 1]

But we end up helping him.

[Co-host 2]

Yeah, we don't want to help him find him.

[Melissa]

Getting involved with another crazy with a crazy woman is it, it's just shows him what he gets, what he gives.

[Co-host 2]

That's true.

[Jeff]

And I sure would, I don't know, there's there. I was talking about this with Stacy because I really do have a lot of dislike for this guy in my heart. I normally don't get this invested in the segments that we do. But this guy's so mean. He's so mean that I feel like we've got this big old radio station and we should be able to do something to where he's, like, walking down the street and people know who he is.

[Co-host 2]

He's so callous. I mean, the fact that he flipped a coin to figure out who to marry, and then after this whole thing has blown up in his face, he still, at that point, can't say, you know what? You're right. I was wrong. I admit my mistake. I move on. Whatever, apologize. No, he's still lying and still trying to get both of them back.

[Jeff]

Here's Alyssa. Good morning. You're part of the Burt Show.

[Caller Alyssa]

Good morning. Yeah, I totally agree. This guy is insane. Go through this whole thing for so many years with these. Both of these girls and then blow up in his face, and he's still trying. I get that college guys, or really a lot of guys, like, try to shoot time, but this is just crazy. Like, if he's a med student and he becomes a doctor, I do not want him anywhere near me.

[Jeff]

Right. And we've got a ton of emails the last couple of days from women that totally empathize with this situation because they've gone through it themselves. Same type thing, you know, the dating Antichrist.

[Co-host 1]

We talked about this over and over again, and we're just seeing it play out right now.

[Jeff]

You know, it's the one guy you just can't. Or one woman you just can't get away from. You know, they're not good for you. They're manipulating you. They border on abuse, if not abusing you.

[Co-host 1]

Emotional abuse. Absolutely.

[Jeff]

They keep trying, and you keep going back. Hey, Melissa, good morning. You're on Q100.

[Melissa]

Good morning. This is Melissa. And you know, I love you, Jeff, just to let you know.

[Co-host 1]

You haven't said anything in 15 minutes.

[Melissa]

US women up here, we don't waste time with our men. We get them in. Just like that.

[Jeff]

You say, get him in that North Georgia area and you'll take care, right?

[Co-host 2]

Yes.

[Co-host 1]

Well, that's what I said. That's what I said the other day about, you know, the legal system. That's great with the dog and everything, but if you did it the redneck way, that dog would have been back that night.

[Jeff]

That's right, man. All right, so the email. I'm just gonna read a couple of lines, and I'll save the rest for when not so Psycho sue is in studio.

[Co-host 2]

All right.

[Jeff]

All right. The email reads in all capital letters, he's yelling at us people. Tool is yelling at us. Berg show.

[Co-host 2]

Grow up. Wait, wait.

[Melissa]

This is coming from him, right?

[Jeff]

I do not want anything to do with either of them anymore. Okay? So there's good news. There's good news. I can do better anyways and have done better since Friday night. They are both pathetic and want to make me look like the bad guy. If you do choose to read this message to either of. Of either of the girls, be sure to tell them I can do better. And they really aren't that great anyways.

[Caller Alyssa]

Oh, come on.

[Jeff]

Right? And then it goes on and on and on to rip on and I'm 12.

[Melissa]

Yeah.

[Co-host 2]

You know what?

[Co-host 1]

Yeah.

[Co-host 2]

Take that. Your mama wears combat boots.

[Co-host 1]

Yeah, I could do better.

[Co-host 2]

Guess what? You're stupid.

[Jeff]

Take that. Wow.

[Co-host 1]

And he's a. He's a med student. Is that what we said?

[Jeff]

He's a med student.

[Co-host 2]

Wow. Bird show.

[Jeff]

Grow up. Dr. Feel I. Psycho. Not so Psycho sue in studio with us on Monday morning. And then when Fiji gets back on Wednesday, that's when the other shoe drops right there.

[Co-host 2]

Man, I thought when we were investigating that Decatur townhouse that we had the greatest story of all time.

[Jeff]

This is it right now.

[Co-host 2]

No, no. This is the greatest story of all

[Jeff]

time on our show.

[Co-host 2]

Get it?

[Jeff]

The Bird show.