Host (Birch) (2:35)

Of course not. Yeah, you've never done that yourself. I mean, you're of course, just something really knowledgeable. Really knowledgeable.

Female Guest 1 (2:44)

I'm a girl. And every girl has it in her.

Female Guest 2 (2:47)

Now, I'm guessing in that's true. I'm guessing there's a pretty good chance because this is definitely more of a girl thing than it is a guy thing, even though guys do it. But it's more of a girl thing, I think, than a guy. I think the drive by, the whole stalking out thing. There's got to be times, I would guess in lesbian breakups.

Female Guest 1 (3:05)

Oh, God.

Female Guest 2 (3:06)

Where they run into each other stalking each other.

Female Guest 1 (3:08)

Your binoculars click when you.

Female Guest 2 (3:12)

Like. You guys, what are you doing here?

Female Guest 1 (3:14)

What are you doing here?

Female Guest 2 (3:16)

A couple of girls break up, right?

Knox (3:17)

I hate you.

Female Guest 1 (3:18)

Don't leave me.

Female Guest 2 (3:18)

So, like, you're watching her front door through your binoculars as she walks. Like, and then she goes to hide in the bushes and she's like right next to you. She's getting closer.

Host (Birch) (3:29)

As you're looking through the binoculars. The face gets larger and larger and larger in the eyesight.

Female Guest 1 (3:34)

And you both have like the, you know, the military camouflage paint on your.

Jessica (3:38)

Face with the bush out of the, you know, you realize you've seen each other.

Female Guest 1 (3:41)

So you run to leave and you get to your car and each of you have slashed tires already.

Host (Birch) (3:45)

Yeah, this was Jessica's story, or at least 60 seconds of it. A couple of weeks ago, I looked.

Female Guest 3 (3:53)

At my ex boyfriend on Monday. Now I almost wish I didn't because I thought that he'd be like, desperate, like not have a job, have 100 kids by now. But he's actually doing better than I thought he would be. But he has a blog on there and it's like you have to be his friend to read it. And it's about one of his ex girlfriends. So I made up a page and.

Jessica (4:14)

Requested him to Be my friend.

Host (Birch) (4:17)

You made it up.

Female Guest 3 (4:19)

Yeah, I made up, like, a whole fake page.

Host (Birch) (4:21)

And there's no way you can dabble in his MySpace page. I mean, if you think you're just gonna go in there and read one blog, you're out of your mind.

Female Guest 3 (4:27)

Well, it's the only blog that's private. Is the one about an ex girlfriend. And all the rest of them are open. I'm like, I don't care about any of that. I just want to read that one.

Host (Birch) (4:36)

Jessica, I want to do something. I want to put you on hold, too, because I think it would be fun to talk to you every day after you read another page. So that was a couple of weeks ago, and now that we're going to be talking to her a little bit more consistently, I think we got to get a little bit of history of the dating, who broke up with who. Why there's this slight obsession going on, or at least curiosity as to what's going on. Hey, Jessica.

Jessica (4:58)

Hey, good morning.

Host (Birch) (4:59)

How are you?

Jessica (4:59)

Good morning. I'm great, except for I've been listening in the past few days. You're like, there's this girl that's gonna come on, and she's totally obsessed with her ex. I'm not obsessed at all. Okay, okay, this is what.

Female Guest 2 (5:12)

Hold on.

Jessica (5:14)

I called a couple weeks ago because someone was talking about spying on their boyfriend or something like that, and this. I'm the girl whose boyfriend cheated on her. And he was like, my everything. Like, he was my first every. Every, everything. So. What?

Female Guest 1 (5:29)

No, I just said. Right.

Host (Birch) (5:30)

We're just confirming.

Female Guest 1 (5:33)

I didn't do the cheating.

Jessica (5:34)

I didn't do the cheating.

Host (Birch) (5:34)

She came on. She came on here looking for a fight today.

Female Guest 1 (5:37)

I know I didn't do it.

Jessica (5:38)

No. Okay. No. So. And it's. I mean, it's been a couple years, and so, of course, I was on MySpace and I looked him up, and I was. I was expecting him to be like, you know, still doing the same job he was doing, like, hating his life, like, everything, you know? So I look him up, and he seemed like he was doing okay. And I was like, oh, whatever. I'm looking on his page, and I wanted to read one of his blogs, but I couldn't because you had to be one of his friends to read it. And so I was like, damn. Like. And it was about his exes, and I'm one of his exes, and I assumed it really was about me, but I still obviously had to see it. So I was talking to one of my friends, and she was like, hello? She's like, fake MySpace AIDS. Hello? And I was like, no, I can't do that. You know? And she was like, well, if you don't do it, I'm gonna do it. I want to read it. I was like, okay, I'll do it. So we find some girl on MySpace who clearly doesn't care what people think about her. You know, her butts hanging out and her boobs are out, and she just is like a slut, you know? So anyway, so we make up this page, and my friend goes in and she spruces it up, and she sends all these random friend requests to these random guys and slutty girls. And once we got enough friend requests, she called me and she's like, okay, send it. So I sent him a friend request and he accepted it. So as soon as he accepted it, I raced in, I read it really quick, and I copied it and I emailed it to the friend who was helping with the page. And it wasn't about me at all. It was just stupid. It was rude. But the thing that pissed me off about it was that when we were together, he was one person. And when I caught him cheating on me, he was a totally different person. Like, I walked into his house and caught him. Like, it was like that. I showed up at the house, we were going to talk, and obviously he didn't know I was coming over. When he walked out of his room, his demeanor and his voice and everything was different. And in talking to the girl that I caught him cheating on me with and his other ex girlfriend and stuff like that, I realized that I didn't know who he was at all.

Host (Birch) (7:47)

You mean, like, he had a different life or he was just a serial cheater type guy?

Jessica (7:51)

I think that. Oh, definitely different life. I mean, he never cursed around me. He never even as a joke, he was never like, shut up. Like, he was always very kind and gentle and sweet. And I just found out the complete opposite from the girl that he was cheating on me with. So when I read it, like I said, it just pissed me off because I was like, he's so rude, you know? So anyway, he starts writing this girl, and, you know, he's just writing her and just flirting with her and being a total idiot. And so I write back to him because I'm like, he's such. He's so stupid. He's such an idiot. So I'm running back to him and I'm being like a dumb girl. Like, oh, this is so funny. Oh, you're so Cute. And, oh, I don't like guys because they're losers, you know, just like that. And he totally, like, ran into the whole thing. So this is not even a day of emailing. Not even a day goes by he's. He asks this girl out to dinner, and I'm like, okay. So he asked me where I like to eat, and I was like, wherever you like to eat. And so I just thought it'd be funny, you know, like, that he goes there and he gets stood up. And so I'm just laughing about it, and I tell my friends, and they're like, somebody has to see this, you know? And they were like, someone has to see this. I was like, no, it's just funny, you know, don't feel stupid. You know, whatever. And so my friend was like, no, we're going down there. So my friend and her husband ended up going down to the restaurant that he was supposed to meet this girl at.

Host (Birch) (9:37)

Where did you guys send him to?

Jessica (9:39)

I don't really want to say just because, you know, I don't want to give too many details, but it was a restaurant, and the time that he said he would be there, my friends were sitting there in the corner. And I described them to him because they had never met him before. And they send me a text message, and they're like, the eagle has landed.

Female Guest 2 (10:00)

And I'm like.

Jessica (10:06)

And anyway, so I'm just sitting there laughing the whole time. They keep calling me and are like, oh, this is so pathetic. So, like, he's sitting in the corner playing on his BlackBerry, and they're like, check the email. Check the email. Because he keeps playing on his BlackBerry. So I go and I check the girl's email, and he's like, here's my number. Feel free to call. Doesn't even say, hey, are you running late? Hey, you want to reschedule? You know, we'll try to play it cool. So anyway, we just keep laughing. They were there for at least 45 minutes, and they had to leave before he left. And they said that every time someone walked in the door, like, he would perk up. You know, he'd look around like, hey, hey. You know, and the girl never showed up.

Host (Birch) (10:46)

So you're just jacking with him at this point. What, so now you're just.

Female Guest 1 (10:51)

I'm surprised he stayed that long.

Jessica (10:53)

Oh, no, no, no. They left at 40. They left, like I said, after 45 minutes, and he was still there. And they said it took him a while to pull out of the parking lot. So anyway, we were just like, laughing. And everybody just thought it was the funniest thing ever. So then I checked the girl's email later, and he sends her another email.

Host (Birch) (11:11)

Saying what?

Jessica (11:11)

Like he wants to reschedule.

Host (Birch) (11:14)

Oh, really?

Jessica (11:15)

What a better. Yeah, he was like. He just kept saying, you know, hey. He said he waited until a certain time. And so I called my friend and I was like, how long are you guys there? What time did you leave? They left like 30 minutes after the time that he said he was there. So obviously he wanted to play it off, like, you know, oh, I didn't wait too long, you know, and he was just like, you know, feel free to call me, you know, maybe we can reschedule. And I wrote back and I was like, oh, I forgot.

Host (Birch) (11:42)

So are you still toying with him now? Like, is he still sending you?

Jessica (11:44)

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Because, I mean, because it is crack. It's. It's total crack. Like, I don't really care about what he says to anybody else. I. I'm sure he has 500 girlfriends. He had two when he was with me, you know, So I. I don't really care who he's dating. And it's not that I want to get back to him at all. It was like the dating Antichrist, you know, like, update. I just did it on my own.

Host (Birch) (12:05)

But there is some. I can understand the satisfaction out of it, though, especially if the guy screwed around on you. Even though it's years later just being able to get back with him or to him in just a little itty bitty way.

Jessica (12:16)

Oh, hell yeah. I felt so victorious. I was like, oh, this is glorious. This is the greatest thing ever. We wanted to, like, I was telling my sister and she was like, you should replace all of the girls pictures with your face. And I was like, yeah. But then I.

Host (Birch) (12:33)

No, because then he gets the upper hand.

Female Guest 1 (12:35)

Yeah. When's the last time you checked the page?

Jessica (12:37)

Oh, I erased it the day that I did it.

Host (Birch) (12:40)

Oh, come on. I don't believe that.

Jessica (12:43)

No, I swear to God. Well, there is something, but I can't really say.

Female Guest 1 (12:47)

Oh, you can't start that. What do you mean?

Host (Birch) (12:49)

Yeah, you can't do that. You can't do that.

Jessica (12:52)

His page is private now.

Host (Birch) (12:54)

His page is private now.

Jessica (12:56)

Yeah, well, because he kept writing the girl like, hey, let's hang out. What do you want to do? Let's reschedule. What's up? What's going on? Let's, you know, like, hey, whatever. And I mean, I bet I could have rescheduled with him at least two or three more times because he sounded desperate, you know, but I just realized it was, it was crack. I don't really care what he has going on in his life now that I know that he's such a loser.

Host (Birch) (13:22)

Well, you know, he was a loser back then too. I don't, I don't think that you can stop this. Like, this is the, the lore of MySpace is that you can't dabble in it. Like now you're behind enemy lines and with that power, I don't think that you could just absolutely stop it. It would be intoxicating, totally intoxicating again, even if you have no intention of ever going out with this guy ever again.

Female Guest 1 (13:40)

But you. To knowledge.

Host (Birch) (13:41)

Right? You know, and knowledge is, is power for sure.

K18 Hair Representative (13:44)

So.

Jessica (13:44)

Well, my knowledge that there was never a girl showing up was definite power. And it was all the satisfaction in the world because like I said, he cheated on me. Bastard. And oh, sorry. He cheated on me and it broke my heart and I haven't seen him in years or anything like that. And I mean he was totally apologetic and blah blah, blah, blah, blah, you know, but still, all I could do then with cry.

Host (Birch) (14:08)

I would almost make a bet with you guys right now for $100 that I would never pay off that if we ended up calling her back in two weeks that she has done something else to spy on him. I just want to check back quickly with you in two weeks because I guarantee you that you cannot, you cannot resist going back in there and finding out what he's up to.

Jessica (14:27)

Okay?

Female Guest 1 (14:29)

I'm telling you, I wouldn't blame you.

Jessica (14:30)

I think you played it brilliantly.

Host (Birch) (14:32)

It is the. It's the modern day drive by is what MySpace is now. You really.

Female Guest 1 (14:36)

It's more convenient.

K18 Hair Representative (14:37)

Totally.

Host (Birch) (14:38)

This is the Birchow.

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Host (Birch) (15:51)

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Female Guest 1 (16:15)

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