The Bert Show – Vault: Phone Scam – Craftmatic Adjustable Bed

Date: October 28, 2025
Podcast: The Bert Show
Host: Pionaire Podcasting

Episode Overview

This episode features one of The Bert Show’s all-time most requested and beloved phone scams: “The Craftmatic Adjustable Bed Scam.” The setup centers on a prank call to a customer service representative at an adjustable bed company, where the caller claims to be trapped inside his own folding bed. The episode showcases the cast’s comedic prowess, combining absurdity with improv wit. The scam, originally aired on Atlanta’s Q100, highlights both the authenticity and sharp humor for which the show is known.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Introduction to the Prank

• The host sets up the episode, noting that this prank (the man “trapped inside an adjustable bed”) is the show’s most requested phone scam of all time ([00:01]).
• The recurring popularity is underscored:

  “Wherever I go in Atlanta, people come up to me and say, I love your phone scams. Especially the one where the guy gets caught in the adjustable bed.” – Host ([00:01])

2. The Prank Call: Unfolds With Improv Comedy

• Call Initiation: The caller phones “Adjustable Beds” customer service, immediately creating confusion by saying he’s “trapped inside” his bed ([00:44]).

  • The representative, Lisa, tries to clarify the absurd situation.

• Comic Escalation:

  • The caller riffs on the situation, describing his predicament in vivid, ridiculous detail:

    “I’m calling from a state of disbelief.” – Caller ([01:02]) “I’m folded up inside here like I’m in a womb.” – Caller ([01:18])

• Customer Service Dilemma: Lisa attempts to troubleshoot, asks if he can “open it up,” to which the caller retorts:

  “No, if I could open it up, be on the phone with you.” – Caller ([01:24])

  • The rep struggles to grasp the situation, tries to connect a technician, and grows increasingly flustered.

3. Absurd Details and Building Tension

• The caller exaggerates his predicament to absurd lengths:

  “I’m completely numb from my navel up until my nipples. I’m numb because of the way I’m folded and I have my knees on either side of my ears.” – Caller ([03:06]) “My life is passing before my eyes.” – Caller ([03:23])

• Lisa becomes more concerned, wondering about involving emergency services:

  “I don’t know if we should call an ambulance at this point or not. Do you want me to call an ambulance for you?” – Lisa ([03:25])

4. Comic Conflict and Reveal

• The representative repeatedly begs the caller to “stop pushing the button” as the bed makes noises ([02:21], [02:48]).
• The caller gets defensive and playful:

  “Stop yelling at me.” – Caller ([03:45])

• A second representative (Tiffany) enters, expressing exasperation and urging cooperation.
• The reveal comes when the caller tells Lisa she’s been “phone scammed” ([04:13]), and the host jumps in to let her in on the joke.

5. Memorable Reactions

• Lisa’s exasperation turns to amused realization as the host explains that her colleagues, John and Tiffany, set her up for the prank.
• The prank ends with collective laughter and the show’s playful chant:

  “We will. We will scam you. The Bird Show.” – Caller ([04:42])

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On the Ridiculousness of the Situation:

  “I’m calling from a state of disbelief.” – Caller ([01:02]) “I’m folded up inside here like I’m in a womb.” – Caller ([01:18]) “I’m completely numb from my navel up until my nipples.” – Caller ([03:06])

• Real Concern from Lisa:

  “I don’t know if we should call an ambulance at this point or not…” – Lisa ([03:25])

• The Reveal:

  “I said you’ve been phone scammed.” – Caller ([04:20]) “This is the brand new bird show at Q100.” – Host ([04:29]) “Oh, God.” – Lisa ([04:31])

• Finale:

  “We will. We will scam you. The Bird Show.” – Caller ([04:42])

Timestamped Highlights

• 00:01 – Host introduces the classic phone scam, sets the scene and hype.
• 00:44 – Caller first claims he’s trapped in the adjustable bed.
• 01:18 – Caller describes being folded up “like in a womb.”
• 02:21 – Rep urgently instructs caller to stop “pushing the button.”
• 03:06 – Caller humorously explains numbness and awkward position.
• 03:25 – Lisa considers calling ambulance.
• 04:13-04:20 – The reveal: caller tells Lisa she’s been “phone scammed.”
• 04:29 – Host reveals the prank to the rep and credits conspirators (John and Tiffany).
• 04:42 – Episode ends with signature “We will. We will scam you” chant.

Tone and Style

• Light-hearted and Playful: Both the prank and the reactions are in good-natured fun.
• Improvised Absurdity: The caller’s improvisations make the situation escalate hilariously, keeping the tone silly but never mean-spirited.
• Supportive Camaraderie: Lisa’s concern is genuine, making the eventual reveal and laughter all the more heartwarming.

Summary Takeaway

This episode is a hallmark of The Bert Show’s signature blend of authenticity, comedy, and camaraderie. The “Craftmatic Adjustable Bed” phone scam stands out for its over-the-top scenario, genuine reactions, and perfectly-timed comedic twists—making it a must-listen (or must-read) for fans of clever prank calls and morning radio hijinks.