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Radio Host
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Joanna
The Burch Show Joanna she's got some beef here.
Melissa
Thanks to a little segment that we call Just curious. Everybody knows now that I've had a breast augmentation, right?
Joanna
Yeah, we should back this up because we were all speculating in studio if producer Joanna had the surgery or not.
Melissa
Right?
Joanna
And I think the guy said no. All the women said yes. And the women were right.
Will
Don't clump me into that. I had never even noticed Joanna's breasts until Melissa brought that subject up in a meeting. Like she's not.
Katie
Anyway, they were trying to guess and everybody thought and I said yes. And so then I was right. Go ahead.
Melissa
So now whenever I go out, I'm not afraid to tell. You know, if someone asks, I'll Tell you yes or no. Well, I've noticed that whenever I go out now, if someone asks me if they're real or not and I say yes, they don't ask if they can grab them, they just go ahead and start grabbing.
Katie
And I'm not random strangers.
Melissa
Yes. Random women are just grabbing my boobs and it's really. They don't say, can I feel them? They just go for it. They just go in for it.
Radio Host
Really?
Katie
Do you think that women who've had breast augmentation who do the. I don't care if you look at them. Let me show them to you. Do you think they have ruined it for you?
Melissa
Yes. Yeah, let's. You know, I don't know who does that. Like, hey, just look at my boobs. I'm not okay with that. I'm very uncomfortable with people just coming up and grabbing them. Mind you, we're usually in a bar so they've had a few drinks and they get a little liquid courage so they think they can just come and grab. But I just wanna put it out there that it's very uncomfortable and I don't appreciate it.
Will
But there are some.
Katie
That's rude.
Will
There are some women. Cause if I remember correctly, when you got yours, it was like a low key thing because there are some women who announce that they're saving up for it, then they go get em, then they're flashing people.
Joanna
As soon as they get them, they're willing to show anybody. I worked with a saleswoman in Dallas. Soon as she walked in, she was gone for a couple of weeks. Comes in, she was showing everybody in the office. So it just takes one woman to really sort of set the mold for everybody else.
Katie
She's ruined it for you.
Melissa
Yeah. I mean whoever it is. And all those women out there would really appreciate it if you keep your tops on because it's really starting to get on my nose.
Joanna
I've seen it happen to Stacy, my wife, at a charity event one night. Yes. Random woman, buzz listener. Hey, you're Bert from the bird show, right? You're. Stacy doesn't even ask. Went right for him.
Will
What did she do?
Joanna
Went right for him. Grabbed Stacey's chest. Charity event.
Will
What did Stacy do?
Joanna
I think Stacey was just buzzed enough to like laugh it off. But then the next day she' did that really happen?
Melissa
That is so bizarre. And then the worst part is that the most. I cannot imagine doing that. The most recent time it happened, I didn't have a bra on. So that's an even more violation because at least With a bra, you have, like, a little, you know, barrier.
Katie
Barrier.
Melissa
This one I didn't. And it was really just. And they were, like, full on, like, handfuls and squeezing them. Do you back away and touched them like that?
Will
Do you back away?
Melissa
Yes. And I was just. You just look at them. You don't want to embarrass them. You don't want to knock them out.
Katie
It's like pregnant belly syndrome.
Will
Slap their hands.
Katie
And people who will touch a pregnant woman's belly without asking is like, they want to touch your silicone or your saline without asking. This rude.
Melissa
Ask me questions. I'll tell you all about it. I'll walk you through the surgery. But I just don't. God, I've never tried this. I'm surprised.
Joanna
I'm surprised that people even, like, random people even ask you about it. Like, it took us months to ask you about it. And we work with you.
Melissa
I mean, I think they're just. I think women feel more comfortable. Like yesterday, some girls at work were going around asking me if I had my boobs done or not. And mind you, I'm a little more covered up at work. I think, like, yesterday I had a turtleneck on and they were asking me. So I don't mind it. I just don't want you grabbing them. Has a guy ever done it? No. Oh, good. So a guy's never come up and
Katie
said, are they real or not?
Melissa
And they asked me. I've had guys ask but never touch. So they ask, they get the answer, and then they don't respond the way women do.
Katie
So this is all girls?
Melissa
This is all women.
Katie
I've never tried it.
Melissa
Well, now you're in a relationship now. But I was going to say you should do that.
Joanna
Go ahead and give her a feel. Good morning. Q100.
Caller
Good morning. Hi. I want to let her know because I don't have the boob problem. I have the hair problem. Kind of like the pregnancy problem. I have really, really big hair. So whenever people see me, especially in a drunk environment, they always feel the need to touch my hair. I mean, like, I can kind of give them the look like, please don't do that. Like, I mean, it's my hair, not yours. You could have just wiped your butt. Who knows? But they always feel the need to grab my hair. Oh, my. You have really, really nice hair. So just let her know. It just comes with the territory, I guess. Really nice boobs and really nice hair and really nice bellies like to get rubbed on.
Joanna
You just need to keep your hands to yourself. Women. Because it's a woman thing, it's not a do thing.
Katie
Yes, because I've seen people do that to Katie because Katie has nice hair. And there are people to go up and we'll rub their fingers. They'll comb it with their fingers like, oh, you have such pretty hair. We're like, what are you doing the
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Radio Host
Visit your nearby Lowes
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Will
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Theme:
This episode of The Bert Show dives into the awkward, funny, and often uncomfortable reality of personal boundaries—specifically, how women who’ve had breast augmentations often find themselves on the receiving end of unsolicited groping from other women. The conversation, led with candidness and humor, explores the social dynamics, the impact of alcohol and environment, and parallels to other types of boundary-crossing behavior (like touching someone’s hair or pregnant belly). Listener calls add relatable stories, making it a lively discussion about consent, body autonomy, and the strange phenomenon of women being most guilty of these boundary blurs.
Quote:
Will [01:53]: “Don’t clump me into that. I had never even noticed Joanna's breasts until Melissa brought that subject up in a meeting.”
Quote:
Melissa [02:23]: “Random women are just grabbing my boobs… They don’t say, ‘can I feel them?’ They just go for it.”
Quote:
Joanna [03:16]: “As soon as she walked in... she was showing everybody in the office. So it just takes one woman to really sort of set the mold for everybody else.”
Quote:
Melissa [04:09]: “They were, like, full on, like, handfuls and squeezing them… You just look at them, you don’t want to embarrass them, you don’t want to knock them out.”
Quote:
Katie [04:24]: “It’s like pregnant belly syndrome... they want to touch your silicone or your saline without asking. It’s rude.”
Quote:
Caller [05:38]: “You could have just wiped your butt, who knows? But they always feel the need to grab my hair.”Joanna [06:06]: “You just need to keep your hands to yourself. Women. Because it’s a woman thing, it’s not a dude thing.”
The episode uses the cast’s trademark comedic, irreverent, and honest panel talk to wrestle with real issues of body autonomy and consent among women—often in surprising and funny ways. While the tone remains lighthearted, the underlying message is clear: no matter how curious or well-intentioned, touching someone’s body or hair without permission is never appropriate, and it’s time for everyone—especially women—to respect each other’s boundaries.
Perfect for listeners who enjoy frank, relatable talk radio about modern social dynamics and “girl code” gone awry, with plenty of laughs along the way.