Vault: Second Date Update

Summary

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The Bert Show – "Vault: Second Date Update" (Dec 8, 2025)

Main Theme / Purpose

This episode of The Bert Show centers around the classic “Second Date Update” segment. Listener Monica seeks closure after a promising first date fizzled into radio silence. The show’s hosts help Monica connect with her date, Mark, live on air to find out the real reason behind his lack of follow-up—leading to revelations, awkward honesty, and plenty of laughs as the team unpacks the sometimes-unspoken etiquette of early dating.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

Monica’s Story: Setting the Scene

• Monica calls in feeling “a little miffed” (01:38) after what she thought was a successful first date that ended without a follow-up.
• She describes the date in detail:
  • Setup by mutual friends; anticipation had built up (01:50)
  • Mark picked her up at her place (Roswell) – “really, really nice because…things are so informal nowadays” (01:53)
  • Nice dinner at Ippolita’s followed by meeting friends at the Slow Comedy Club, turning the night into a double date with good chemistry, hand-holding, and flirting (02:12)
  • Everyone went back to Monica’s nearby place to “watch a movie and have a few drinks”—Mark stayed the night, but “was a perfect gentleman about it” and slept on the couch (03:05)
  • Morning after: Monica made breakfast, they watched TV, “it was really nice. We kissed again in the morning,” but there was “a little difference” likely due to morning breath (05:03)

The Panel’s Theories: Why Did Mark Fade Out?

• Hosts and panel toss out predictions ranging from:
  • Mark having another girlfriend ("I think he's got another girlfriend." — Mark, 06:43)
  • Mark being married or closeted, or simply put off by Monica’s breakfast (“I was thinking you…can’t cook” – Jeff, 06:55)
• Monica says their mutual friend Kyle would have known if Mark was already attached, and reiterates confusion (“I can’t even fathom…” — Monica, 07:04)

The Confrontation: Mark Joins Live On Air

• The hosts call Mark with Monica on the line.
• Monica tells Mark directly: “I’d rather just know what it was and move on than, like, wonder why we had such an awesome date ... and I just didn’t hear from you.” (09:50)
• Mark is uncomfortable but agrees to be honest: (10:14)
  • Reveals the reason he didn’t pursue a second date:
    “She picked up her copy of Glamour ... walked into the bathroom and didn’t emerge for about 15 minutes... Call me old fashioned, but I’m right there. That’s just nasty.” (12:14)

The Team Reacts: Bathroom Etiquette Debate

• General shock and laughter at Mark’s “dealbreaker.”
• Jen: “She took a magazine into the pooper.” (12:31)
• Mark (caller): “Girls should be discreet about that...girls reading for 15 minutes on the crapper?” (13:16)
• Monica, quietly: “No, it’s okay. I asked for honesty, and I got it.” (15:02)
• The hosts debate whether Mark’s reaction is fair or sexist; some agree there's a “double standard,” others say “just don’t make it obvious on a first date.” (13:38–16:09)

Call-Ins & More Laughter

• Lynn calls in, sharing her routine:
  “Yes. I sit on the toilet and take a dunk and my boyfriend sits right in front of me and plays his guitar.” (18:26)—to widespread horror and disbelief from the show; Jen jokes, “Does he incorporate the sounds of the dump taking into the song?” (18:38)
• Show devolves into more banter about relationships and bathroom etiquette, keeping things lighthearted.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Monica’s open vulnerability:

  • “We kissed a lot…it was nice, right?” (04:17, Monica)
  • “I just want to know what the deal is and move on.” (11:22, Monica)

• Mark’s uncomfortable honesty:

  • “She walked into the bathroom and didn’t emerge for about 15 minutes.” (12:23, Mark - caller)
  • “Girls…should be discreet about that…girls reading for 15 minutes on the crapper? …I’m sorry. That just…killed it.” (13:16, Mark - caller)

• Jen’s comic summation:

  • “A woman in the restroom needs to be like Chili’s. Get in, get out, get on with your life.” (13:21)
  • “Coffee does that.” (15:06)
  • “If you date a girl named Monica in Roswell, I would stay away from Indian food.” (15:36)

• The hosts acknowledging social double standards:

  • “I don’t think it has to be a guy girl thing.” (14:01, Jeff)
  • “Hold those things off until … it’s further along.” (13:38, Jen)

• The humor keeps rolling:

  • “Poop.” (16:13, Bert)
  • “Everyone does it.” (16:16, Monica)
  • “Not with a book.” (16:19, Mark)
  • “If she had to go … or risk getting a hug and then sharting—oh, come on.” (17:02, Jen)
  • “You’re not one of the guys? No. And, you know, I don’t even think guys should do that on the first date. I don’t want to think about you pooping.” (16:08, Mark and Jeff)
  • “Doesn’t everybody?” (18:22, Jen)

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Important Segment Timestamps

• [01:38] Monica Introduces Her Story
• [02:12] Recap of the Date
• [05:03] The Morning After
• [06:43] Theories on Mark’s Radio Silence
• [08:43] Mark Is Called Live
• [09:50] Monica Asks for Honesty & Closure
• [12:14] Mark Reveals the Glamour/Restroom Incident
• [13:21] Panel Discusses “Dealbreakers” and Double Standards
• [15:02] Monica Accepts the Answer
• [18:26] Listener Call: Music in the Restroom

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Tone & Language

• The episode is playful, unfiltered, and occasionally irreverent, in keeping with the Bert Show’s signature style. The hosts, and even Monica, meet an awkward conversation with good humor.
• While the revelation is embarrassing for Monica, she takes it in stride (“No, it’s okay. I asked for honesty and I got it.”).
• The group bounces back and forth between sympathy, teasing, and philosophical reflection on social norms and “bathroom boundaries” in dating.

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Takeaways

• Even after a seemingly perfect date, small human quirks (or perceived social missteps) can be deal-breakers.
• The Bert Show’s approach turns uncomfortable real-life moments into opportunities for candor, laughter, and camaraderie.
• Ultimately, the show suggests everyone has their quirks, everyone has to “go,” and, as Monica’s story reminds us, sometimes the answer to ghosting is far stranger—and more human—than we’d guess.

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Transcript

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[Mark]

Purch hey, the Bird Show. Hey Monica, how are you doing?

[Monica]

I'm alright, A little miffed. Yeah, you know, I just wondering how we can fix this whole situation I got going on.

[Mark]

So Monica, when did this happen and what happened on the date?

[Monica]

Well, it happened. We went out probably a few weeks ago. Even my friend had set us up. It had been kind of like this wrong thing trying to get the two of us together for a while and we finally like, you know, threw the details in and got together, got on the phone and he actually came and picked me up in my place, which is really, really, really nice because I feel like, you know, nowadays at least things are so informal. So he came and picked me up I live in Roswell. So he came, picked me up in Roswell, and we went out to dinner at this little Italian place called Ippolita's. And it was nice, you know, everything was cool. Like, we got along great. We had, like, great conversations like that. Dinner was awesome. And then we went and met up our friends, actually, at the slow comedy club. And that was even more fun because it was almost like we were on this little double date, you know, and they. They were, like, hanging out. And Kyle was even the whole time, he was, like, winking at me and stuff because, you know, Mark was being so cute. He had his arm around me and, like, you know, he'd been holding my hand at one point, so it just kind of seemed like this instantaneous, like, click. Like, we just clicked and got along really great.

[Jen]

What did your friends think of him?

[Monica]

Oh, Kyle thought he was awesome. He was like, you know, obviously he thought that we had a lot of chemistry going on, because it seemed that way. Like I said, he had his arm around. It was cute. It was so cute. And we had a lot of fun. And so afterwards we had a few drinks there and stuff, but afterwards we all went back to my place because it's a pretty close bar and stuff. So we hung out there and watched. Watched a movie and, like, had a few drinks and stuff like that. And it was really cute. Like I said, it was like double date. It seemed very natural. It was awesome. And then, you know, challenge anyone home eventually. So I didn't think it was appropriate that he would drive home. He lives about midtown. So it kind of seemed like, you know, it wouldn't be right if he drank and stuff. So he cashed at my place, which was totally fine. He was a perfect gentleman about it. He actually slept on the couch.

[Jen]

Okay.

[Monica]

Yeah. You know, it wasn't even like that. It was perfect. He was a gentleman and slept on the couch, and I gave him some blankets and stuff. And, you know, we kissed and stuff. It was really nice.

[Jen]

Defying and stuff.

[Mark]

We kissed.

[Monica]

We kissed a lot. It was nice, right?

[Jen]

Did that involve a milkshake? Yeah.

[Monica]

I guess everything was nice. It was perfect.

[Jen]

But I think the point.

[Jeff]

He wants to know if all the kisses were on the lips, if all.

[Monica]

Excuse me.

[Mark]

I think what Jeff is trying to establish here is if it was really just very kind of innocent.

[Jen]

Did you touch the parts that got Michael Jackson in trouble?

But did you touch the parts that got Michael Jackson in trouble? You know what I mean?

[Monica]

No.

[Jen]

Okay.

[Mark]

All right. So it's very innocent stuff. Just Kissing on the mouth. And then you go to sleep, he crashes on the couch.

[Monica]

Yeah.

[Mark]

Okay. In the morning, when the both of you wake up, is it that awkwardness or did you guys go to breakfast and take off or.

[Monica]

No, actually, I made breakfast for the two of us.

[Mark]

Cool.

[Monica]

And we hung out at my place, and you kind of watched some TV on the couch and had breakfast together, and it was really nice. We kissed again in the morning.

But I kind of thought that would have been. It seemed a little off, but I think it was because we both woken up and kind of had morning breath and stuff. So I don't know if I was holding back or if he was kind of holding back, but it was definitely a little different in the morning.

[Mark]

Okay. Was his attitude any different?

[Monica]

Oh, no, not at all. Like, it was cute. We were on the couch, like, watching TV and having breakfast, and it was. It was awesome. I mean, when we. We parted, you know, he. He was completely receptive to hanging out again and talking more and, you know.

[Jeff]

All right, you say, first of all, how late did he stay? When you say he's completely receptive, was it something you brought up or was it something he brought up?

[Monica]

Something he brought up. He said, you know, like, oh, we'll talk soon. I'll talk to you soon. We'll get together. I mean, he didn't stay that late. It was probably like 11:30 or 12. Something around noonish.

[Jeff]

Okay.

[Mark]

All right. And when he finally takes off, how does the whole thing end? Is there a kiss? Is there a hug? Is there a. I'll call you.

[Monica]

There was a kiss and I'll call you.

[Mark]

Okay. It all sounds.

[Jeff]

I can't figure out why he wouldn't want to go. In a second.

[Jen]

I think it's.

[Mark]

You know what I say, Jenner guys are kind of like an iceberg. What you get to see is about 10% from the water up, and underneath, there's a lot more stuff going on.

Well, it all sounds pretty. Pretty. I mean, legit.

[Jeff]

You're so profound, bro. I love that about you.

[Jen]

Can nobody else see it?

[Mark]

What?

[Jen]

You want to make your predictions first, then I'll tell you what's really happening.

[Mark]

I think he's got another girlfriend.

[Jen]

Anybody else?

[Monica]

Oh, really?

[Jen]

I think he's married and gay.

[Jeff]

What?

[Mark]

Yeah, Married.

[Monica]

Where did you go set me up with him? Like, why would.

[Jeff]

I was thinking that you might have been a really bad cook. And after breakfast, he was like, oh, can't date her. She can't cook.

[Jen]

Guys don't care about that if they're sleeping in the house the first night.

[Monica]

I don't think that it would have been. I can't even fathom what it would be.

[Mark]

But one of your friends set you up though, so we know he's not married, right?

[Monica]

Well, that's the thing is because like he's a friend that somebody. He's somebody my friend hooked me up with.

[Mark]

Yeah. So that.

[Monica]

So I don't think he could be married or have a girlfriend because Kyle would kill me already. Like I've known Kyle for years.

[Jeff]

Those are things just throws that out. I think my argument was the fact that. That things didn't happen between the two of you that evening. And I think he's just taken off.

[Mark]

Well, I could tell you that if on a first date, if a guy gets on the couch and spends the night there, then he's thinking, I could probably do this, you know, and the next time or the time after. So he would give it another shot. Yeah. So. Yeah.

[Jeff]

Okay.

[Mark]

Yeah.

[Jeff]

So that.

[Mark]

Well, we could speculate all we want or we can call this guy, try to get him on and find out exactly what happened.

[Monica]

Well, that's. That's what I'm trying to figure out here.

[Mark]

All right, Monica, what you have to do for us though, if we get this guy on the phone here and Jeff and producer Tracy will try to strong arm to come on, you have to assure him that you'd rather this thing be over than have it open ended the way it is right now. Like, you want closure and you want total honesty, right?

[Bert]

Yes.

[Mark]

Because most guys, it's gonna be. They don't want to say why they haven't called, but you have to assure them that it'll be all right.

[Monica]

Okay, well, I want to know. So I'd rather have the closure so it won't be a problem.

[Mark]

And we're calling him now.

Now he knows he's coming on.

[Jen]

I kind of.

[Mark]

What do you mean kind of?

[Jeff]

Jeff was just trying to beat you to the dialing so that you wouldn't screw it up.

[Bert]

Screw it up?

[Mark]

Yeah.

[Jen]

Please, no dialing.

[Mark]

Do I need to tell this guy he's on the radio? Does he know he's coming on the radio or.

[Jen]

It'll work itself out.

[Mark (caller)]

Hello?

[Mark]

Hi, this is Mark. Yeah, hi, Mark. This is Bert and Jeff and Jen and Melissa. And we're on the radio right now on a radio station called all the hits Q100.

[Mark (caller)]

Okay.

[Mark]

Hi, Mark, how are you?

[Mark (caller)]

I'm well. What's this about?

[Mark]

We have Monica on with us also.

[Mark (caller)]

Okay.

[Mark]

Hi, Monica. You want to say hi to Mark.

[Monica]

Hey, Mark.

[Mark (caller)]

Hi, Monica. What's going on?

[Monica]

Stuff. I haven't actually talked to you in a while.

[Mark (caller)]

Yeah, Mark.

[Mark]

Here's the reason why we're calling Mark is Monica said that she had a really, really great time with you guys on your date a couple of weeks ago.

[Mark (caller)]

Right, Right.

[Mark]

And she really thought that there was going to be a second date. I mean, you crashed over at her place. You know, everything was pretty innocent. You woke up the next day, she made breakfast for you. When you took off, you said, you know what? I can't wait to do this again, or whatever. And there hasn't been an again. So she's wondering what happened. And, Monica, maybe this is the good. This is the part here where you tell him that you're looking for total honesty.

[Monica]

Oh, yeah. Closure is really why I'm on the phone with this whole deal. Because I'd rather just know what it was and move on than, like, wonder why we had such an awesome date and everything seemingly went great and I just didn't hear from you.

[Mark (caller)]

Yeah, well.

[Jen]

Neat, huh?

[Mark (caller)]

To be honest.

Yeah, it was a great first date. Monica, you know, you're a really great girl. To be honest, I don't know why you chose to do this over the radio. I just woke up. I don't feel real comfortable talking about this over the air.

[Mark]

Well, she said that she's been trying to kind of call you and figure out why there hasn't been a second date. But conveniently, like, she'll tell you she's gonna be in a meeting till 9:30 and you're leaving voicemail messages for at 9:15 or you leave her a message at home when, you know she's at work. So she kind of felt like there was no other way to do it.

[Jen]

Is that. Is that just. I mean, are you doing that intentionally or is that just a little.

[Mark (caller)]

No, no, it's just like, you know, I just. I call her back when I can, you know.

[Mark]

But you haven't called, really, I mean, and spoken to her in two weeks. And if the date went as great as Monica said that. I know when I was single, if it went great, I'd have figured out a way to talk to the girl that I was really interested in.

[Jeff]

And, Mark, again, we're asking for total honesty. I know that we've kind of caught you off guard. You might be a little uncomfortable. But like Monica said, she just wants closure. So you feel, you know, no pressure on you. There's no reason to feel uncomfortable giving us total honesty.

[Mark]

Right, Monica?

[Monica]

Yeah, I just want to know what the deal is and move on. I mean, I just would rather know than.

[Mark (caller)]

All right.

[Mark]

I mean, total honesty is what she's looking for.

[Jen]

Is it accurate to assume that there was one particular thing that caused.

[Mark]

Yeah, okay.

[Mark (caller)]

All right. I mean, if you want honesty, I'll give it to you. I mean, Monica, all due respect, you are a great girl. It was a good first date. There was one thing.

You know, the next morning, you know, we woke up, we were hanging out, watching tv, whatnot. And you know, when. When I was kind of getting ready to leave, we were cleaning up, you know, folding up the sheets from the couch and whatnot. And. And.

I can't believe. All right, total honesty. Total honesty.

[Jeff]

Okay.

[Mark (caller)]

She. She picked up her copy of Glamour that was on the coffee table and she.

She walked into the bathroom and didn't emerge for about 15 minutes.

[Jen]

I'd say, okay, she took a magazine into the pooper.

[Mark (caller)]

Yeah, no, call me old fashioned, but I'm right there. That's just nasty.

[Mark]

Are you serious? You haven't called this girl back because she reads when she's in the bathroom?

[Jen]

Yeah, I say good for you.

[Mark (caller)]

If. Yeah, thank you.

[Jeff]

Pooping from your first date.

[Mark (caller)]

Listen, yeah, supposed to do okay.

[Jeff]

Supposed to hang tight. He was just about to leave.

[Jen]

Maybe that's a problem.

[Mark (caller)]

Maybe she was hanging great and, like, the chemistry seemed to be there. And I'm. But I'm sorry, that just. Monica, that just killed it. Because girls, you know, should be discreet about that. You know, that guys, that's one thing. But girls reading for 15 minutes on the crapper?

[Mark]

Come on.

[Mark (caller)]

I'm sorry. That's totally.

[Mark]

It wasn't 15 minutes.

[Mark (caller)]

I swear to God, it was 15 minutes.

[Jen]

I tell you what, a woman in the restroom needs to be like, Chili's. Get in, get out, get on with your life.

[Mark (caller)]

That's what I feel. I'm sorry. Call me old fashioned, call me shallow, but that's just nasty. It turned me off and I didn't know how to say it to her. I'm sorry, Monica. What can I say?

[Jeff]

See, I mean, I'm more on Jen's camp than the guys because, I mean, you can't be double standard even when it comes to those things. But I do agree with Jen. I mean, you hold those things off until, you know, somebody said it were. I mean, if it were, if I were going on a date with Mark and he went into my bathroom and did that, I'd be like, ew, no, you're out of here. We're done. I mean, I think it's either way, in front of somebody you're first starting to date.

[Mark]

I'm wondering.

[Jeff]

I don't think it has to be a guy girl thing.

[Mark]

I'm wondering.

[Jen]

Hey, but if you gotta go, you gotta go.

[Mark]

Mark. Was it more that she. She did that or she took the magazine and she took the magazine in?

[Mark (caller)]

I mean, it's a little both, but it's definitely the magazine. Put it over the top. Because, like, that's just.

[Jen]

Well, if she's. Like, if she didn't take the magazine, she could have been plucking or peeling or whatever.

[Mark (caller)]

Yeah, exactly. She could have just been primping and printing.

[Jeff]

But, yeah, or pretend like you're taking a shower, turn on the shower, whatever. Like, just don't make it obviously that you're going number two.

[Mark (caller)]

I mean, yeah, it was real. And it was, like, right before I left. I mean, I'm sitting there basically with my coat on, and she's in the grabber. I'm sorry, Monica. You want honesty.

[Mark]

I'm sorry, Monica. You've been awfully quiet.

[Jeff]

Are you still there?

[Monica]

Yeah, still here.

[Jen]

I think we've learned not to get the sausage at Ippolitos, haven't we?

[Jeff]

Stop.

[Mark (caller)]

No.

[Mark]

Come on now.

[Monica]

Yeah. Thanks for helping out, guys.

[Mark (caller)]

Sorry.

[Mark]

I'm sorry, Monica.

[Monica]

No, it's okay. I asked for honesty and I got it.

[Jen]

Coffee does that.

[Jeff]

I mean, it works for Jessica Simpson and Nick Lachey. Cause they're married. She can drop the kids off at the pool and nobody will really say anything about it.

[Mark]

Yeah.

[Monica]

Yeah, I. I definitely. I don't know what to say.

[Jen]

I think the last. Yeah, we can all take from this is if, I mean, Monica's gonna meet another guy and there's gonna be another date.

[Mark]

And come on, now, she's already embarrassed.

[Jen]

I'm not gonna embarrass you.

[Mark]

I'm not. Mark will let you go. Monica will let you go. I'm sorry.

[Monica]

All right, guys. Thank you for helping out.

[Jen]

All right. I just think it's. If you date a girl named Monica in Roswell, I would stay away from Indian food.

[Mark]

Yeah, stop now. But I don't even like the fact that my wife does that. I don't like the fact that God made that a part of a woman's life.

It's not the magazine part.

[Jeff]

That's just guys having to deal with the fact that it happens. But on a first date, you don't make a dramatic scene where you grab a magazine off the coffee table and walk to the bathroom? You're not one of the guys? No. And, you know, I don't even think guys should do that on the first date. I don't want to think about you pooping.

[Mark]

Ew.

[Jeff]

I don't want to think about anybody pooping.

[Mark]

Morning. All the hits. Q100.

[Bert]

Poop.

[Monica]

Good morning.

[Mark]

Hi.

[Monica]

Well, everyone does it.

[Mark]

Oh, come on.

[Jen]

Not with a book.

[Mark]

On a first date.

[Monica]

If you're out drinking the night before, sometimes you get the craps in the morning.

[Jeff]

Hold on, hold on.

[Jen]

Now.

[Jeff]

Wait a second. If your first date is sitting on the couch with his coat on, you can wait five minutes to say goodbye and then unleash the demons anytime you want to.

[Mark]

That's what I called for. You do a deuce.

[Jen]

But I mean, if there's. In her defense, if she's. If she's. If it was all like, you know, like. Like, if she had to go and the debate was, either go now and get it out of your system or risk getting a hug and then sharding. Oh, come on.

[Jeff]

Say, Jeff, you're just. You know what? Just jump off the plane. You know, jump off the plane.

[Mark]

If Stacy and I are on vacation and we're, like, staying in a bungalow or something, and these are really small. You said bung bungalow.

I will make her go outside onto the patio and read a book while I'm in there. It's that.

[Jen]

I thought you were sending her out there to do the deuce.

[Mark]

Yeah, go dig yourself a hole like a cat. I get the bathroom, you get the beach.

[Jen]

And make sure you kick sand over it so you don't step in it again.

[Mark]

And be sure to lick yourself good before you come in the house.

[Jen]

You gotta admit, people poop is funny.

[Jeff]

If he's on his way out the door, I'd be rushing, like, okay, but, you know, okay, hard to get. Get out the door, lock it, and then do your business.

[Jen]

Right?

[Jeff]

I'm not gonna make somebody sit there and know what I'm doing.

[Jen]

Because, you know, then when you're halfway through it, you're gonna get a. I forgot my gloves.

[Mark]

And you're in there, and you know, he knows it into a glamour. And that's another thing.

[Jen]

Don't take.

[Mark]

Women shouldn't be reading in the bathroom.

[Jeff]

Shut up, shut up, shut up.

[Mark]

That is a dad thing to do. No, no. Women should not be reading in the bathroom.

[Jen]

That's just.

[Jeff]

That's just being stupid.

[Jen]

Boy, might as well smoke a cigar and eat beans right out of the can while you're in there.

[Bert]

Ew.

[Jeff]

Is that what you do?

[Bert]

Yeah.

[Jen]

Doesn't everybody?

[Mark]

Hi, Lynn. You're on all the hits. Q100.

[Monica]

Yes. I sit on the toilet and take a dunk and my boyfriend sits right in front of me and plays his guitar. And it's nothing.

[Mark]

That is about the grossest thing I've ever heard in my friggin life.

[Jen]

It's a great visual. Does he incorporate the sounds of the dump taking into the song he's playing on the guitar?

[Jeff]

No.

[Monica]

We gotta stop. I don't know which is.

[Jeff]

I don't know which is worse. The fact that she goes to the bathroom in front of her boyfriend or he's playing the guitar in the bathroom.

[Mark]

Right. This next song I'd like to entitle. Do a Deuce.

[Jeff]

And he doesn't get disturbed by the smell of it. No.

[Monica]

I'm gonna tell you guys something.

[Mark]

Yeah? Ryan has to. Ryan, Jen's husband has to go to Gainesville to write songs. And your boyfriend is writing right there while you're doing a deuce.

[Jeff]

I'm so creeped out right now. Yeah, so does anybody have a magazine? I gotta go.

[Mark]

Get out of here. You're not one of them. Aren't I? I bet. Reading like comic books or stuff like that.

[Jen]

Star Trek 2004.

[Mark]

Hey, the bird show.

[Bert]

Guys. Thanks for helping me carry my Christmas tree, Zoe.

[Mark]

This thing weighs a ton.

[Mark (caller)]

Drewski, lift with your legs, man.

[Monica]

Santa. Santa, did you get my letter?

[Jen]

He's talking to you, Bridges.

[Mark]

I'm not.

[Bert]

Of course he did. Right, Santa?

[Mark]

You know my elf, Drew Ski here. He handles the nice list. An elf?

[Jen]

I'm six' three. What everyone wants is iPhone 17 and at T Mobile, you can get it on them. That center stage front camera is amazing for group selfies.

[Mark]

Right, Mrs. Claus?

[Bert]

I'm Mrs. Claus much younger sister. And AT T Mobile, there's no trade in needed when you switch. So you can keep your old phone.

[Mark]

Or give it as a gift.

[Bert]

And the best part, you can make the switch to T Mobile from your.

[Mark]

Phone in just 15 minutes.

[Jen]

Nice.

[Mark]

My side of the tree is slipping, Kimber. The holidays are better. AT T Mobile, switch in just 15.

[Jen]

Minutes and get iPhone 17 on us.

[Mark]

With no trade in needed.

[Jen]

And now T Mobile is available in US cellular stores with 24 monthly bill.

[Mark]

Credits for well qualified customers plus tax and $35 device connection charge credits and imbalance due if you pay off earlier. Cancel Finance agreement. 256 gigs, $830 eligible Ford in a new line, $100 plus a month plan with auto pay, plus taxes and fees required. Check out 15 minutes or less per line.

[Monica]

Visit t mobile.com Dashing through the store, Dave's looking for a gift, one you can't ignore.

[Jeff]

But not the socks he picked.

[Mark]

I know. I'm putting them back.

[Monica]

Hey Dave, here's a tip. Put scratchers on your list.

[Mark]

Oh, scratchers.

[Jen]

Good idea.

[Monica]

It's an easy shopping trip. We're glad we could assist.

[Mark]

Thanks, random singing people.

[Monica]

So be like Dave, it's holiday and give the gift of play Scratchers from the California Lottery. A little play can make your day.

[Mark]

Please play responsibly. Must be 18 years or older to purchase player claim.

[Bert]

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