Vault: She can be in the Rose Bowl if she play's an instrument

Summary

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Episode Overview

Main Theme:
In this spirited episode of The Bert Show, Melissa shares an exciting and unexpected journey sparked by a bucket list wish: attending—and possibly joining—the famed Rose Bowl Parade. The discussion unfolds about parade traditions, the artistry behind it, and Melissa’s humorous attempts to fulfill the marching band’s requirement that she must play an instrument to march in the parade. Listeners and co-hosts join in with anecdotes, advice, and laughter, as Melissa commits to embracing this unique challenge.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

Melissa’s Bucket List and the Rose Bowl Parade

• Melissa recounts a recent, thrilling invitation tied to a long-held aspiration: attending the Rose Bowl Parade, which she’d mentioned on the show as a bucket list item (01:02).
• She describes the parade's unique requirement: every float must be decorated with only organic materials (01:47), highlighting the creativity and artistry involved—using things like mustard seed, coconut, herbs, and spices for color and texture (01:51, 01:59).

“If you've never seen the Rose Bowl Parade ... every float is made of organic material. So you are not allowed in the Rose Bowl parade to have anything on your float that's not organic.”
—Melissa (01:47)

• Personal connection: Melissa notes that watching the parade was an annual tradition with her mother, deepening her fondness for the event (02:00).
• She appreciates the level of creativity, comparing it to her interests in other artistic competitions such as Project Runway (02:48).

The Big Invitation

• Melissa reveals that after mentioning her wish, Central Carroll High School from Carroll County invited her to join their marching band for the 2011 Rose Bowl Parade (03:22).
• But there’s a catch: she must actually play an instrument as an honorary band member (03:26).

"To become an honorary member of the band, you must play an instrument in the band. That is incredible."
—Melissa (04:11)

Musical Ability… or Lack Thereof

• The hosts affectionately tease Melissa about her musical prowess, searching for evidence like old singing samples (04:12).
• Melissa candidly recalls her limited band experience—once playing the saxophone but only barely passing over the last chair because "Christy Davis ... couldn't get a noise to come out of her saxophone" (05:25).

"I was next to last saxophone chair only because Christy Davis, who was last chair, couldn't get a noise to come out of her saxophone ... So I cannot play an instru—"
—Melissa (05:25)

Possible Parade Roles & Instrument Selection

• The idea of Melissa joining as a color guard member (flag/baton twirler) instead of playing an instrument is floated, recalling her junior high days as a flag girl (06:01).
• Central Carroll, however, is adamant she must play an instrument, and they will choose which one (06:37).

"They have to choose the instrument for me to play… sometime soon we'll have some of the members of the Central Carroll High School Marching Band to come on to tell me what instrument I'm playing."
—Melissa (06:38)

• Jokes abound about the possible instrument choices—with concerns about heavy instruments (tuba), easy ones (flute, clarinet), and the minimum musical jokes she’ll receive depending on the instrument (07:04–07:14).

Commitment & Community Involvement

• Melissa openly accepts the challenge, even if it means public practice and possible embarrassment (08:40).
• She’s excited to help with fundraising and band activities, grateful for the opportunity and community spirit (06:20).

“...they're making what they're checking off one of my items on my bucket list for me.”
—Melissa (08:40)

Listeners and Co-Hosts Chime In

• Listeners call in to share their band experiences—like carrying a banner just to go to Disney or being in the color guard with supportive staff (08:13, 08:55).
• The co-hosts playfully worry about Melissa’s pets enduring her at-home practice sessions (09:30).

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Memorable Quotes & Moments

• On Parade Rules:
  “Every float is made of organic material. ... you are not allowed in the Rose Bowl parade to have anything on your float that's not organic.”
  —Melissa (01:47)

• On Musical Talent:
  “I was next to last saxophone chair only because Christy Davis ... couldn't get a noise to come out of her saxophone ... So I cannot play an instru—”
  —Melissa (05:25)

• On Instrument Choice Jokes:
  “Flute is going to earn you a year's worth of jokes from me.”
  —Co-host (07:09)

• On Commitment:
  “I'll do this. I will be part of it. ... they're checking off one of my items on my bucket list for me.”
  —Melissa (08:40)

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Important Segments & Timestamps

• Melissa shares her Rose Bowl Parade dream: 01:02–02:34
• Parade artistry and materials explained: 01:47–02:00
• Central Carroll invitation revealed: 03:22–04:12
• Band membership requirement (must play an instrument): 04:12–04:38
• Melissa’s musical backstory and saxophone story: 05:01–05:57
• Discussion of color guard alternative: 06:00–06:09
• Commitment and instrument selection process: 06:20–06:56
• Band instrument speculation and jokes: 07:04–07:35
• Listener stories and band memories: 08:11–09:10
• Concerns for Melissa’s pets enduring practice: 09:30

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Tone & Style

The conversation is upbeat, playful, and slightly self-deprecating, filled with light teasing, candid admissions, and affectionate camaraderie. Melissa’s willingness to laugh at herself enhances the connection with both the live audience and listeners at home.

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Summary Notes

• Melissa’s candidness and humor set the tone, inviting listeners into her vulnerability and excitement over this bucket-list adventure.
• The discussion is as much about the journey as the destination—highlighting courage, community, and the spirit of trying something new, even if it means fumbling through.
• The segment ends with the promise of follow-up: Melissa will soon learn which instrument she must conquer, making for anticipated future segments and more laughs.

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Transcript

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Listen, it's the vert show.

[Melissa]

Recently I got an invitation that's very exciting. And it was based on a random conversation I had on air about a bucket list item. Like, you know, the bucket list is things you want to do before you die. And so like some things on my bucket list, which is probably on a lot of people's, is like, attend the Academy Awards. I'd love to do that once before I die. Somehow get in that building or write a book or, you know, one of the other things I had said on the air randomly was that I wanted to attend the Rose bowl parade because I'm one of those geeks that loves that parade in particular because. Because if you've never seen the Rose bowl parade, you've heard of it, you've heard of the Rose Bowl. And the parade beforehand is every float is made of organic material. So you are not allowed in the Rose bowl parade to have anything on your float that's not organic. Meaning. Cause it's the Tournament of Roses parade.

[Co-host (possibly male)]

So that's why it's all like wooden floats with flowers.

[Melissa]

And it's not just flowers. Like if when they're coloring some of the big items on the float, they're using mustard seed or they're using coconut or they're, you know, like.

[Co-host (possibly male)]

I don't think I knew that.

[Melissa]

Yeah, I mean it's, it is intensive and it's the timing too. So it's not only that they have to do that and find all the materials to do it, but they can't do it too soon because it's organic and it'll rot. Yeah. So anyway, it's just fascinating to me, and it's something that my mother and I used to watch, and it's something I watch now. HGTV has this great coverage because they have the experts on that can tell you all the. Like I said, I'm trying to think of some other items, just random like herbs and spices that sometimes they can get glue and brush on these things. So I love the artistry of it. And so. And it being.

[Co-host (possibly male)]

And I think it's important to know, too. You may not know this about Melissa, but she is artistic. Like, she custom. Like, all of every time you get a Christmas card from Melissa, it's a custom. It's a Melissa Carter design. So it's not just like a weird, geeky obsession.

[Melissa]

Yeah. So, yeah, anything creative. Like, one of the things I like about Project Runway, for instance, I'm not a big clothes person, but the fact they have to make it like anything like that, where it takes a lot of creativity and effort and passion, I really appreciate. So, anyway, so I said on the air, just off the cuff one day that I think it was right after New Year's, and I said, you know, I'd love someday to go to the Rose bowl parade. Okay. Well, soon after that, I actually got an email from a representative at Central Carroll High School. Okay. In Carroll County. And they have been invited. Their band is going to be in the 2011 Rose bowl parade.

[Co-host (possibly female)]

Oh, that's awesome.

[Melissa]

Now, you have to think about there's.

[Co-host (possibly male)]

That's a year almost, that's 11 months from now.

[Melissa]

That is the next Rose bowl parade. Central Carroll High School is going to be in that parade. And it is, you know, much like when we helped South Cobb, going to the inauguration parade, you can get an invitation, but it's up to you to do your own fundraising for the event. So they had invited me to become an honorary member of the band because they said, we would love to fill your dream in being a part of the Rose bowl parade. So this is. But one of the things is that I'm going to share with you on air is that Central Carol High School, some of the band members came to talk to me about this. And so the agreement is, you know, we would love to do this for you, and we would love to make sure that you get to the Rose bowl parade. But to become an honorary member of the band, you must play an instrument in the band. That is incredible. Now Let me just.

[Co-host (possibly male)]

Hey, Wendy, why don't you look for some samples of Melissa singing if you could, just so we could get a full. So we have a good.

[Melissa]

This is not a chorus that's going.

[Co-host (possibly male)]

I'm just saying it could be representative of your music ability, which I don't have any.

[Melissa]

I may have artistic.

[Co-host (possibly female)]

Did you ever play an instrument growing up or anything?

[Melissa]

And I explained to the nice juniors of the band that I. My history of any kind of musical talent or not any. Do you ever think when you're right where this thing can go? Am I crazy or falling in love? Is it real or just another. They may change their mind at this point. Yeah, no, that's. Baby, I know it. You've lost that love and feeling. Katie just broke up with me.

[Co-host (possibly male)]

You're singing a romantic song to her.

[Melissa]

You've lost that love. Oh, God. Wow. Well, and the other. You know, just to add to that, in junior high school in my hometown, you know, everybody tried the band at first, and so I was. I chose saxophone and I was.

[Co-host (possibly male)]

I played saxophone.

[Melissa]

Did you?

[Co-host (possibly male)]

Yeah, for one year I tried the band.

[Melissa]

Well, they. They rank you based on. If you've never played in the band before, they rank you based on your chair. So if anytime you see a band, especially if they're not marching, if it's, you know, some kind of, you know, you go to another event and they have their chairs. They're. They are ranked based on those chairs. And so one end is the best to one end is the. Is the worst. I was next to last saxophone chair only because Christy Davis, who was last chair, couldn't get a noise to come out of her saxophone because she could never quite make it. So that's the only reason I was beating anybody in the saxophone. So I cannot play an instru.

[Co-host (possibly female)]

Why don't you try that for the flag girls? Because I was in the marching band

[Melissa]

and I did the flags.

[Co-host (possibly female)]

So why don't you be. What's that called again? Color guard. Color guard.

[Melissa]

Well, you know, I. I appreciated what they were trying to tell me.

[Band Member / Color Guard]

Okay.

[Melissa]

The guys over at Central Carol. Because, you know, we couldn't. You couldn't hear my progression over the year. If I was twirling a rifle, you can hear it in an instrument.

[Co-host (possibly female)]

That's true.

[Melissa]

But the agreement for them. So it's a very generous. They're like, you know what? We want you to be part of our fundraisers. We want you to, you know, you got to be part member of the ban. Do some fundraising, and you'll Be out in Pasadena with us for the 2011 Rose Bowl. That's awesome. But they have to choose the instrument for me to play.

[Co-host (possibly male)]

Oh, they're choosing the instrument.

[Melissa]

They're choosing the instrument. So sometime soon we'll have some of the members of the Central Carol High School Marching Band to come on to tell me what instrument I'm playing. And I have to learn it this year and play it.

[Co-host (possibly male)]

Do you have a preference right now going into it?

[Co-host (possibly female)]

That was great.

[Melissa]

No, because I can't. I mean, I. No, because.

[Co-host (possibly male)]

Well, you don't want it to be something giant because you want. Yeah, tuba. That's heavy. You don't want to have to maybe

[Co-host (possibly female)]

a flute because that's like a long parade route.

[Melissa]

You know, I, I said I flute

[Co-host (possibly male)]

is going to earn you a year's worth of jokes from me.

[Co-host (possibly female)]

Just so you know, because American Pie,

[Melissa]

anything's going to do that instrument one time at band camp.

[Co-host (possibly male)]

Yeah. What about, what about clarinet? Isn't it like clarinet, the go to first instrument?

[Melissa]

Well, I mean, it's up to them. It's up to now and it might be.

[Co-host (possibly male)]

What if they heard you singing, you

[Co-host (possibly female)]

were in the drums, like in the right.

[Melissa]

Or they could put me on where I just hit the big bass drum.

[Co-host (possibly male)]

That would weird me out though, because the marching with. I'm bad at rhythm. Like, I can't dance and like I'd be like marching and I'd screw up the whole. Cause I'd start marching in the rhythm that I'm banging the drum to.

[Co-host (possibly female)]

You're gonna have to go to rehearsals and everything. Yeah.

[Melissa]

And one of the things they said is that they said, you know, well, even as you get, you know, better that there'll be a performance they could do with, you know, a part of the band in which I get a solo.

[Co-host (possibly male)]

Really? I will definitely be going. Hey, Kerry, welcome to the bird show.

[Listener / Guest]

Hey, Melissa.

[Melissa]

Yes.

[Listener / Guest]

You and I are about the same age and I always appreciate what you say about a lot of things, especially about high school. But back in 1987, so I could go to the band and they were going to Disney, I begged the, the leader if I could hold the banner so I could walk down the. Just so I can go to Disney. And it was not pretty trying to keep in step.

[Co-host (possibly male)]

You do know last time Melissa had to walk at Disney, she broke her ankle.

[Melissa]

That's right.

[Co-host (possibly male)]

So perhaps banner would not be her instrument.

[Melissa]

Now, I appreciate you trying to save me. I do. But I, you know, I committed to them. I said, I'll do this. I Will be part of it. Because like I said, they're making what they're checking off one of my items on my bucket list for me.

[Co-host (possibly male)]

Hey, Jessica. Welcome to the bird show.

[Band Member / Color Guard]

Hi. I was just gonna tell her that it's really fun. I was in the color guard. And you just. I mean, Mr. Ruby is like an awesome person. If you'll just listen him, he'll help you follow instruction. Huh?

[Melissa]

Just following instruction.

[Band Member / Color Guard]

Yeah, he's a really nice guy. And the band I was in there, I was in the color guard. I wasn't actually playing an instrument, but I mean, the band members are really nice. Like, they'll really help you. Yeah.

[Melissa]

You know, the three band members I met at central, Carol came in, you know, and they were very sweet, But I know in their minds they were thinking, we've got her now.

[Co-host (possibly female)]

You know who I feel bad for is the band. Sully and Gigi, your animals, because they're gonna have to be your audience while you're really, really bad.

[Melissa]

No, no. They're gonna love and support me as dogs do.

[Co-host (possibly male)]

Hey, Tracy. Welcome to the bird show.

[Band Member / Color Guard]

Hey, I've got one word for Melissa. I don't know if they would have it in the marching band, but

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[Melissa]

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