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Right now, Momentous is offering our listeners up to 35% off your first subscription order with promo code Acast. Go to livemomentous.com and use promo code Acast for up to 35% off your first Subscription Order. That's livemomentous.com promo code Acast. You're on the Birch show. We just had absolutely, really no advice for this call that we took on Friday at all. Yeah, her name is Jessica and she called up to say, you know what, my best friend, her husband is cheating and my friend knows it. The wife knows the husband's cheating, but she really doesn't want to like know about it. She doesn't want to have the conversation with him about it. And apparently the husband had approached the wife to say, look, we need to talk and so that's why the wife called Jessica for advice, because she's like, you know what? If he's calling, if he's wanting to talk, to confess his affairs, I don't want to know about it. I don't want to have the conversation. So how do I avoid this conversation with my husband? And that's why Jessica came to us on how does a woman who knows her husband's cheating keep him from confessing it? Good morning, Jessica. Hi there. How you doing? I'm okay. How are you today? Okay. All right. I'm a little confused as to what the entire situation is. Are you the friend of the woman who has the cheating husband? Are you the wife of the guy that is cheating? Oh, no, no, no, no. I'm her friend. Your best friend. Okay, do tell. What's going on? Okay, I'm a little confused, too. But my best friend called me last night and she said she. She needs some advice. And, you know, I'm dumbfounded. And I told my husband about it, and he's dumbfounded, too. But basically, this is the situation. Now, she lives out of town, so she's not, you know, she can't possibly hear this conversation. What are we going to call her? I'm sorry, do you want to give her a different name? Oh, I, you know, I just. I'll skip her name. That's fine. Eventually it's going to. We're going to have to name her something. Yeah, we have to get. Have a fake name. We will call her Delilah. Delilah. Delilah. All right, Delilah. Okay. And her husband Samson is messing around. Yeah. The story of Samson having an affair, and it's been going on like two or three years. How do you know this? Well, she knows it. She just knows it, you know, and she's told me, but he doesn't know that she knows. Okay, let's back up just a mini step. Yeah. It's been going on for a while. She knows. Is this a feeling she has? Has she seen texts? Has she heard phone calls? No, she hasn't heard phone calls, but she. She'll smell perfume on him. He's gone out of town, kind of, and he says it's for work, and it's not. You know, it's a little bit mysterious. And I believe she did find some text messages. Okay, So, I mean, she's pretty sure, actually, she's very sure that he's been having this affair, but she's fine with it. And that's the thing that just. I can't understand, but she's fine with It. She's fine just to let him do what he does. And, you know, she feels like he makes good money and he takes care of kids and takes care of her really well, and she's happy with her life the way it is, and she doesn't want to, you know, cause any problems, and she doesn't want to address this issue. So anyway, however, he has been out of town last week, and he called her and said, honey, I love you, and I have something I want to talk about. And she's been really nervous. She called me and she's really nervous that he's. He's going to, you know, confess, because she feels like that if he confesses that she has to actually do something about this affair, she has to address this issue and some kind of action has to be taken, and she just wants to live in ignorance. If you believe that. Yeah, We've heard this kind of thing before, you know. Really? Yeah. Where women would say, I would just rather not know. Okay. I don't know that we've ever talked to anybody that knows for sure and just doesn't want to deal with it. Because now she's happy in this arrangement. She is. She's happy in her marriage. She likes the way, you know, the kind of relationship they have. Is he wealthy? He makes good money. Yeah, yeah. So everything else, if he's broke, she's like, hey, why you cheating on me? Right. He's a good dad. I mean, he seems to be there for the kids and all, so she's happy with that. Right. And the relationship itself, outside the infidelity, seems to be working okay for them. Exactly. So she's like, let's not rock the boat. I already know you're having sex with somebody else, so. But if he brings it up, then it's gonna change everything. Right? Right. Exactly. Do you think that he's gonna be. I mean, I don't know. I know that this is your best friend, but I don't know how well you know her husband, but do you think that he is going to tell her that he's having an affair and he's in love with someone else? I think that might be her fear. And I think, too, that he might, you know, he might even say that he wants to be with this other person. So I'm sure that's a huge part of her fear. She doesn't want to lose him. So either way, this weekend when he comes back, it's going to be a defining point. At least she thinks of the relationship. Either he's taken off, or he's going to confess to this thing that she doesn't even want to know about. And either way, the relationship is different. Exactly. And she asked me, you know, how do I avoid this conversation? You know, how do I let him have his cake and eat it, too? And I. Of course I don't. I have no idea what to say to that. And so I'm wondering what you guys think. What does your husband say? I'm curious, because you said you talked to him about it and he's pretty dumbfounded, too. Well, he doesn't know what kind of advice to give her, but he's amazed at this woman. I think secretly he's. I don't know. I think secretly he's like, wow, she's cool, you know? But, yeah, we don't know what to tell her. I bet once this whole thing passes over, it's totally unrelated, but once this whole thing is done and you've given her the advice and everything's happened, I bet your husband starts to discourage your friendship with her. You think so? Yeah, Like, I would. I don't know how cool I would be with Jessica hanging out with someone who. Well, no. Okay, I take that back. Because I was thinking that she was the one cheating, but she's not. So, yeah, never mind. I take that back. But, like, if she was the one doing the blatantly cheating is what I was thinking, that'd be a problem. But, yeah, yeah, he doesn't care. He'll hang out with her and hope for a threesome. Let's go ahead and assume that the conversation is not, I want to leave you for this other woman. And let's go ahead and assume that the conversation is supposed to be, I just want you to know that I've been seeing this other woman and I feel awful about it. So the advice that we're looking for. Let me ask you this. Is it how does she avoid the conversation? Or just how does she stop it before it starts? Well, that's what she asked me, but I think, you know, I don't know if she can avoid this conversation. I mean, I don't think she knows what to say to him if he does confess. 404-441-1005 I've got nothing. I don't think she can. I don't think she can. Especially if he wants to confess to say, I, I'm in love with this other person, I want to be with them, then she's not going to be able to avoid it if his. If he. Because I Mean, correct me if I'm wrong, usually when a. If a man's going to go to this level, if that's what he wants to talk to her about, number one. But if he goes to this level, he's wanting to take action of some kind, like, is it just a guilt thing or is it that he's been pushed to the point where he has to say something because he wants to get something different? Haven't we seen this play out in movies and television also where. And I know I've seen this in a movie before as old school movie called Cousins with Ted Danson, where the woman in this movie knows that her husband is messing around. She knows it and says to him, straight off the. Right off the bat, as he's going to confess, don't say anything here that's going to change our relationship. Don't say anything at all right now that's going to change our relationship. And doesn't ever really say, I know what's going on, but just says, keep your secrets to yourself and we're going to be fine. Wow. I don't know if that's a conversation that she can have. Well, like Melissa said, if he wants to change something about their relationship, if he wants to do something different with this other woman, then he will force that conversation to happen regardless. But if he's just trying to confess, then you may be right. Maybe she just says, don't tell me anything, but you know, I love you at face value of where we are right now, and I don't want anything to change. You have stumped the Birch show community. Very few calls coming in. Nobody really knows how to handle it. Well, I don't know. It's hard for us to encourage honesty and then try to discourage honesty. I. I just don't. I think that's the movies. I mean, I really think that's the movies. I really think that, you know, we've talked to, unfortunately, so many people who have been in situations of infidelity where if a guy's getting away with it, then why is he going to change what's going on? Unless, like I said, he wants to be with that other person. I. Yeah, I. Unless the guilt has just overcome him to the point where he feels the need to whatever. Or what if he has broken it off with the other person and now feel like, what if he's had one of these second, you know, coming like the. What is it called? Like he had to come to Jesus talk with himself. An epiphany. Yes. And he broke it off with the other person. Now he's going to confess to his wife. Wife. And then. Unless the mistress has threatened to tell her if he doesn't. This is a good one. This is a tough one. Morning, Q100. Good morning. He is still leaving her. You think so? He is leaving her. Yes. He's not going to feel guilty after two or three years, right? All of a sudden he's gonna feel guilty? No, he's leaving her. I tend to agree with that, too. I mean, yeah, it's. Yeah. It just. It seems like that's the whole reason behind him wanting to have this conversation. You're kind of on your own on this one. I don't even know what to tell him. But we do want to check back with you on Monday, find out what the conversation was all about. Okay? Okay. Okay. Sounds good. Thanks, guys. Sorry we couldn't be more helpful. At least maybe we gave you a couple of things to listen over. I don't know. You're on the Burch show. Oh, hey. Welcome to gift wrapping. Whoa. So we Saldana. Hey, can you wrap these, please? Wow. IPhone 17s. You splurged at T Mobile. You can get four iPhone 17s on them. The new center stage front camera is amazing for group selfies. It's the perfect gift for everyone. I'm the worst. I only got my mom a robe. Well, it's better than socks. So I have to trade in my old phone, right? No, AT T Mobile. There's no trade ins needed when you switch. Keep your old phone or give it as a gift. Incredible. In fact, wrap up my old phone too, for my aunt Rosa. Forget that. Aunt Liz will be jealous. Sounds like my family drama. Oh, I got it. I'll give it to my abuela. I'll take reindeer paper with. Hey, where are you going? 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