Loading summary
Narrator/Advertiser
January is when we recommit to the habits that support our health and well being. And naturally, we start looking at what can support those goals, including supplements. The supplement industry is a low trust category. It's lightly regulated. Products are easy to make, and companies don't even have to list everything on their label. That's exactly why I choose Momentus. They've become the high trust brand in a low trust category. They weren't satisfied with the industry standard, so they built the Momentus standard. Their commitment to doing things the right way, not the easy way. What truly sets Momentous apart is their testing and transparency. Every product is independently certified by NSF for sport, meaning it's tested for contaminants, heavy metals, banned substances, and verified for label accuracy. So you always know exactly what you're putting in your body. And if a product doesn't meet their standard, it never hits the shelves. In a space where trust is rare, man, Momentous is redefining what trust looks like. And I've genuinely felt the difference. Using their protein and creatine every day right now, Momentous is offering our listeners up to 35% off your first order with promo code PODCAST. Head to livemomentous.com and use promo code PODCAST for up to 35 percent off your first order. That's livemomentous.com promo code PODCAST.
Jennifer Wilbanks
Hey, I.
Host
Had the time of my life. Hey, I never felt this way before.
Co-host 1
From building timelines to assigning the right people and even spotting risks across dozens of projects, Monday Sidekick knows your business, thinks ahead and takes action. One click on the star and consider it done.
Host
And I owe it all to you.
Co-host 2
Try Monday Sidekick AI you'll love to.
Co-host 1
Use on Monday.com.
Host
The Birch Show Voice disguiser on.
Co-host 3
Yes.
Host
Okay. We are gonna call you Jennifer, as in Jennifer Wilbanks. Good morning. How about just willbanks Will Banks.
Co-host 3
How about Crazy Eyes?
Jennifer Wilbanks
I'm not willbanks.
Host
You're this close. Though.
Jennifer Wilbanks
What surprisingly is. My fiance's in bed and I told him I was going for a run.
Co-host 1
Oh, wow.
Jennifer Wilbanks
I guess I should have rethought that, huh?
Advertiser/Guest
Yeah.
Host
So he's actually in the other room right now.
Jennifer Wilbanks
No, no, no. I'm out of the apartment. I went for a run. He's asleep.
Host
Okay. You didn't bring any scissors with you, did you?
Narrator/Advertiser
No.
Co-host 1
Not trying to catch a cab or anything. Going. Running to the library.
Co-host 2
Are you wearing your engagement?
Jennifer Wilbanks
I am wearing the ring. I've been spotted wearing the ring.
Co-host 1
No bus tickets, nothing like that. Okay.
Jennifer Wilbanks
No, no, no.
Host
All right. Give us a little history here, Wilbanks. How long have you guys been married? Or how long have you been going out? I mean, when did you get engaged? And lead us right up to the cold feet thing.
Jennifer Wilbanks
Okay. We started dating about three years ago. We've known each other seriously since I was like three years old. We have a child together. We got engaged on Christmas Eve originally. We're going to do a wedding later on in the year, but decided to move it up. Really? Fine. Up until this point, he has a best friend that he actually dated in high school. Kind of like the first girlfriend and everything. And they remained really good friends afterwards. So he respects her opinion a lot. But when he told her that we were gonna. That he asked. He was gonna ask me to marry him, she said, I guess, do whatever makes you happy. But why her? Even though we've been together for so long and everything. Okay, so basically she's the type that. She doesn't want him. She don't want anyone else to want him kind of thing.
Co-host 1
Are you sure she doesn't want him?
Jennifer Wilbanks
Well, I've always had my doubts, but I just put it out of my mind. But up until now and because just. Just because the other day he was talking to her, he was like, are you coming to the wedding? Just making sure and everything. She was like, yep, I'll be there. Just like a really snooty type of I've got something going on type attitude. And he told me, like, as a joke, like, thinking it would be funny if that happened. And it's not funny. So just kind of nervous about what's gonna happen during this ceremony, I guess, or if she does have ulterior motives or so. And it's tomorrow, so I don't really know what to do.
Co-host 2
Well, what would he say if you told him that she was uninvited?
Host
Oh, no, that'd be pretty interesting.
Jennifer Wilbanks
It's not just her. He's friends, like, her entire family too, and so they're coming to the wedding as well.
Host
I can understand how this would cause you, like, some stress and all, but I mean, to call off the entire wedding over it.
Jennifer Wilbanks
Oh, no, no, I'm not gonna call off the wedding. I'm worried that there's gonna be a fight in the middle of it if she does happen to say something. I know for a fact I've got a couple of my friends that I told that I thought something of that, you know, got the eagle eye on her during the ceremony. I said, if she stands up, you run after him.
Host
The last line of your email says, I need to know if this is just. If this is cold feet or if this might really be a problem.
Jennifer Wilbanks
Yeah.
Host
So when you say, is this cold feet? You're not. You're not even. Not for a second thinking about calling off the wedding over this? The wedding. You're fine with that?
Co-host 1
You're fine with him?
Host
You're fine with him? You're fine with the wedding?
Jennifer Wilbanks
Fine with him, then I like that. I know, but I know how some. Well, a lot of brides, you know, like. Right. Like there's not before, you know, get very, very nervous, very, very antsy and think big things of small things. So I'm just trying to see if I'm making a huge deal out of this small little thing, you know, little problem or if it could potentially, because there are girls out there that are that bold to try to do that.
Co-host 1
All right, Ms. Wilbanks, let me ask you a question. So in order to determine that, I think we need to know, has there been any issues with this woman you said you've dated your boyfriend for? And I'm curious if there's been issues with her in those three years, not just now.
Jennifer Wilbanks
You mean issues of her telling him the same thing like this?
Co-host 1
Well, I mean, issues that. I mean with. With you and their friendship. You know, you say that they're best friends, but they were also each other's first, you know. So I'm curious.
Advertiser/Guest
What.
Co-host 1
How has she affected your relationship with your fiance in the three years you've been together?
Jennifer Wilbanks
Well, basically, like, she. It's like she would try to befriend me for him, but it's always like she had some kind of attitude every time we were around or something. And once actually, well, it was a long time ago when we were first together. Tried to talk me out of being with him because she thought that he wasn't ready for a relationship. So she's tried to talk me out of it before. And just her attitude and the way that she has such strong opinions toward, you know, that he most of the time doesn't ever act on. But, you know, you never know what that one thing you can say that could, you know, who knows? If she says something to him tomorrow.
Host
Melissa's shaking her head. What's up?
Co-host 1
Well, my concern number one is I don't think she doesn't want him. You said she doesn't want him for herself, but she doesn't want him for anybody else either. I don't agree that she doesn't want him. And Two, I'm concerned because, you know, okay, the ceremony, let's say it goes without a hitch tomorrow. There's still issues with this woman, I think, in your relationship. And I think that, you know, you hope that friends of each person in the relationship is going to respect that relationship and be supportive. And I don't know, I just really, I'm confused as to why you and him have never had a conversation about her before, because I have, I have the feeling that I would have brought it up because she does not sound like a best friend, good friend to everybody. She sounds like somebody who is trying to sabotage her relationship.
Jennifer Wilbanks
Right. I have talked to him about it before and he had just had reassured me, you know, this is our relationship and she doesn't run our relationship. It's on us and not her. And you know, she's just got strong opinions and, you know, she can be a brat and, you know, I would just ignore her is what he's told me.
Co-host 2
From a guy's perspective, I'm curious for Burton Jeff's opinion on this. Like, is it possible that he's unaware of his, you know, you know, buddy being this much of a pain in the butt to his soon to be wife? Like, is it, is it possible that he is like, oh, no big deal, she's just my friend.
Host
Yeah, we understate everything. Guys understate everything. Where women are more complicated, you know, maybe you guys either see into things more than we do or see them for what they are more than we do. I think we're pretty basic creatures.
Co-host 3
I definitely think that women have a different perspective than guys in situations like that. And I think we are not intentionally. Or her fiance is not intentionally playing it down, but he, like, we like girl. I think on stuff like that girls are smarter than guys in terms of figuring out because guys are just so surface. So girls can figure out like the couple layers down. And guys we have. You can explain it until you're blue in the face. And the only way, well, the way you've got us is we, we go, all right, fine. I don't, I don't understand what you're saying, but if that's the way it is and that's the way you want it to be.
Co-host 2
So, so he genuinely does not, does not see anything, see anything. Like he genuinely doesn't feel like this woman's a concern. He genuinely is. Like his heart's in the right place going into this wedding.
Co-host 3
Like, if she's doing, like, it's like, it's like a girl who's flirting with a guy, you know, and the guy is talking to her and whatever, and then explains to his girlfriend, oh, she's just being nice.
Co-host 2
She's not.
Co-host 3
She's not flirting.
Advertiser/Guest
She's not.
Co-host 3
She holds everybody's hand when she talks to him and kisses him with tongue when they leave.
Co-host 1
Right, Right.
Co-host 3
I mean, that's just. That's just the way she is. Like, seriously. Seriously. I mean, I don't know if I've ever even seen her with a shirt on. I mean, come on.
Host
To me, it's almost. There's an issue with the wedding also, but it may be too. Well, maybe it's never too late to talk about it. Like, if I had to redo my wedding. Like, we had a guy at my wedding that was a real close friend of Stacy's. They had slept together years and years and years ago. They'd been best friends, and they slept with each other a couple of times. And she wanted him at the wedding. And I said, you know what? Fine. Let's have him at the wedding. And I was. I was uncomfortable about it. And if I could do it all over again, I would have said to her, I don't want him there. I just don't want him there.
Co-host 2
It would have been more of your day.
Host
Would have been more my day. And they, they. They kept. I was never threatened by the relationship. Just having him there was irking me. And I should have had the sack to say, you know what? I would rather not have him here. That's my day. This is just about you and I.
Co-host 1
And I think that. Yeah, I think that, Ms. Wilbanks, that you are. It is your day, and you are allowed. Your wedding is one of the few times that you're allowed to be complet. Selfish. And everyone should understand. And so if there is anything. I mean, this wedding should be about you and your fiance. And when you're up there with the preacher, minister, whoever, then you should only be thinking about the fiance instead of you and your girlfriends having to give the evil eye. Like you said to this other woman.
Host
You don't have to be playing those games. All right? So, Jennifer, let's go ahead, and I'm gonna put you on hold, and then we'll take a whole bunch of calls for you here because a lot of people have opinions on it. Okay? All right, hold on.
Narrator/Advertiser
All right.
Host
Voice disguise are off. And Heather, you're on all the hits. Q100. Hello.
Jennifer Wilbanks
Hi.
Host
Hi.
Jennifer Wilbanks
I had a question for Ms. Wilbanks. Who told you that the best friend had said, you know.
Caller 1
Well, why her? Who told you this?
Host
Hold on one second. Voice disguiser back on.
Co-host 3
Affirmative.
Host
Hey, Jennifer.
Jennifer Wilbanks
Yes.
Host
How'd you find out what this woman was saying about you?
Jennifer Wilbanks
Through a friend.
Host
Not through.
Jennifer Wilbanks
One of. One of his friends.
Host
One of his.
Jennifer Wilbanks
Maybe he had told her that.
Co-host 2
So your soon to be husband told a friend and that friend told you?
Jennifer Wilbanks
Yeah, I think maybe he didn't want to say it to me to hurt my feelings.
Host
Okay, hold on one sec. Hey, Amanda. Good morning.
Jennifer Wilbanks
Hey. I just.
Caller 2
First, I want to say I love your show. And my advice to Ms. Wilbanks is to uninvite this ex. I believe she needs to talk to her fiance tonight and be like, listen, I'm not. I'm not comfortable with her coming. We need to not invite her anymore. And I think that he should understand that it's her day and she's gonna have this thought in the back of her mind the whole day. If the girl shows up.
Host
I totally agree. And I'll take it one step further than that. If they get married and this woman is still an Al and Jennifer is still upset, then I think that she has every right to say, look, this is not a person we can have in our life. I'm not comfortable.
Caller 2
Definitely. Definitely. I had a similar situation. And you can't. You can't have exes in the relationship, and you definitely can't have them at the wedding.
Host
Agreed.
Co-host 1
And I think with the wedding. Also think if 10 years from now you're looking at the wedding photos and the first thing in your mind is not the drama or the frustration you had that day over this some random woman.
Host
Hey, Ray.
Narrator/Advertiser
Hey.
Host
Hey.
Caller 1
Question for the caller. Was her general concern about the friend causing a disturbance? Was she concerned about the friend causing a disturbance during the objection part of the ceremony?
Co-host 2
Yes.
Caller 1
I've had. I've heard of similar concerns with other people's marriages where they've been concerned about a party in the congregation maybe playing a joke or seriously objecting to the two people being married. It's actually a pretty common practice now with the way marriages are customized with the vows and whatnot, you can actually get together with the pastor and they can actually leave that line out of the ceremony altogether.
Host
You see, I think if you have somebody at your wedding where that is a possibility that they're going to stand up and say, I object, that person should not be at the wedding. You shouldn't have to go to the pastor. You shouldn't have to alter your traditions, your ceremony. If you've got somebody at the wedding that there's a possibility and cut it off before it even happens.
Co-host 1
And is this a case of a woman trying to be nice and trying to let everything, you know, include everybody and not want to. Want to come across as mean or bitchy or whatever, you know, and. Because that's the thing is, I think too many women, like, she's not wanting. She's not doing what she wants because she doesn't want to come across as mean.
Host
Omar disagrees with us. Hey, Omar. Hey.
Caller 1
How you doing, guys?
Host
All right, man.
Caller 1
Hey, you know, I've been listening to this, and really, I think, you know, he's marrying her. She needs to just realize it and be happy with that. I mean, women, I think, have this uncanny knack of turning molehills into mountains and reading into things.
Co-host 1
I don't agree with this. I don't agree with this situation, because I do think this woman is trying to sabotage their relationship. And this is a huge ceremony for women. And the fact that this woman's gonna come in and make her purposely try to make her feel uncomfortable at her own wedding is a concern.
Co-host 2
Well, to me, it doesn't matter if she's making a mountain out of a molehill or not. It's her wedding.
Host
Right.
Co-host 2
She's the bride.
Host
Right.
Co-host 2
So whether she is or not, I think is insignificant.
Host
Unless this is a deal breaker. Unless there's a bigger issue. I mean, we don't have him on the line here, so we don't know the whole story, but this may be a line in the sand for him, too. I mean, if it's that big an issue, then, yeah, they probably shouldn't get married tomorrow.
Co-host 3
Isn't it like a Geneva Convention rule or something, though, that whatever the woman wants for the wedding gets, like, the guy shouldn't even argue it.
Advertiser/Guest
Right.
Co-host 3
Argue with it.
Narrator/Advertiser
Yeah.
Co-host 3
Yeah.
Host
Once you propose and she says yes, get out of the way.
Advertiser/Guest
Yeah.
Co-host 2
Right.
Host
Talitha, you're gonna be the last call on all the hits. Q100. Hi. Hello. That makes things easy. And we are back to. Jennifer, can we get the voice disguiser on? Yes, sir. Yellow.
Jennifer Wilbanks
Yeah.
Host
Did you hear all of that?
Jennifer Wilbanks
Yeah, I did.
Host
What do you think?
Jennifer Wilbanks
I think maybe I am just making something out of nothing. I mean, I really could be.
Co-host 2
Well, you also have to remember, Wilbanks, this is your day, okay? This is seriously your day. I understand how with everything that goes on, getting ready for your wedding, planning your wedding, all of the stress of everything, that this could be an exaggerated thing that's stressing you out. That this could be something that's causing you cold feet. But you know what? Listen to that voice in your head and don't let her ruin your wedding day. This is your day.
Jennifer Wilbanks
Okay, Bert.
Co-host 1
Oh, I'm sorry.
Host
Are you going directly on your honeymoon?
Jennifer Wilbanks
Yes, sir.
Host
You are. Okay. I wanted to check in with you on Monday, but if you're going to be gone.
Co-host 3
Is she going with you guys?
Jennifer Wilbanks
No, no, no.
Co-host 1
Bert had mentioned earlier about lying in the sand. Has he made a big. I mean, when you've brought her up, or do you think that if you said, I don't want her to come tomorrow, I mean, do you think he will make an issue out of it, or do you think that he doesn't care?
Jennifer Wilbanks
No, I think he would make an issue of it. In fact, I know he would make an issue of it.
Host
So he would say, look, if you don't want her there, then I'm sorry that we can't get married.
Jennifer Wilbanks
No, he wouldn't say that, but he would be definitely we need to talk afterwards type thing.
Co-host 3
Why?
Jennifer Wilbanks
Well, just because they have been such great friends. I mean, it is probably what you were saying about how he probably just doesn't notice it. And I mean, it was, you think a lot of the time, and a lot of the callers you get, their best friends don't even want to believe that, you know, their, you know, significant other or their other best friend or anything like that. Like, even though they know they might be telling the truth. You know what I'm saying?
Co-host 1
Well, I think the difference here, though, from what you're comparing it to is the fact that you're his fiance. Like, I. It may be conservative, but I do think in order, ranking order, you come first, especially on your wedding day.
Host
Of course. Yeah.
Co-host 1
You know, so, I mean, if you're.
Host
Going to be uncomfortable even a little bit on your own wedding day, then you got to eliminate what's going to make you uncomfortable.
Co-host 1
Yeah.
Jennifer Wilbanks
All righty.
Co-host 1
And they're in. And again, they're not just best friends. They were together at one point, right?
Jennifer Wilbanks
For a little bit, yes.
Host
Man, I wish I. I was there. I wish I would have handled it differently. I wish I would have bucked up and said, stace, I don't want him at the wedding.
Co-host 2
And this is from somebody that's already been through it.
Host
Been there.
Co-host 2
You know, be selfish. You're the bride.
Host
Can we get your numbers and call you when you get back from your.
Co-host 3
Honeymoon or on your honeymoon?
Jennifer Wilbanks
Yeah, no, not on the honeymoon.
Host
Yeah. When you get back, we'll talk to you about it.
Jennifer Wilbanks
Okay.
Host
Okay.
Narrator/Advertiser
Bye.
Advertiser/Guest
Bye.
Co-host 1
Thanks.
Host
Good luck.
Narrator/Advertiser
Thanks.
Co-host 1
It's your day and I know guys. You know, you talk about women and their complex minds. This best friend is conniving.
Co-host 2
Yeah.
Co-host 1
This best friend wants this man.
Co-host 2
She's living the Julia Roberts side of that movie, you know? This other woman is the Bird Show.
Advertiser/Guest
This is Paige desorbo from Giggly Squad. Boost Mobile gives you the same network coverage, speed and service you're used to, just at a more affordable price. Why pay more if you don't have to? Offering reliable nationwide coverage backed by a 30 day money back guarantee. Love your service or get your money back, no questions asked. Visit your nearest Boost Mobile store or head to boostmobile.com to learn more. After 30GB, customers may experience slower speeds. Customers who cancel within 30 days of activation will have Boost service fees refunded, activation fees if applicable, and phone payments will not be refunded.
Advertiser
The playoffs start this weekend and now you can trade on football legally nationwide on Kalshi. Right now, Pittsburgh is trading at 38 to beat Houston. That means a hundred dollar trade pays out 264 with a win. On Cowshi, you're trading against peers in a live market, meaning there's no house. And as the odds change, you can buy in or out of your position all game long. And for a limited time, download the Kalshi app and use code iheart to get 20 when you trade 100k a l s h I Kalshi Trade on any.
Date: January 12, 2026
Host: Pionaire Podcasting
Main Cast: Bert, Kristin, Abby, Cassie, Tommy, and rotating co-hosts
Main Guest: "Jennifer Wilbanks" (caller, using a voice disguiser)
This episode dives into a classic relationship dilemma: A bride-to-be, using the pseudonym "Jennifer Wilbanks," seeks advice about her fiancé's best friend—a woman he once dated—attending their imminent wedding. The discussion focuses on jealousy, boundaries in relationships, wedding day anxieties, and whether Jennifer’s worries amount to pre-wedding nerves or signal deeper issues. The Bert Show team and several listeners weigh in, exploring gender perspectives, the “right to be selfish” at your own wedding, and where to draw boundaries with exes.
Quote:
“He has a best friend that he actually dated in high school...But when he told her...she said, I guess, do whatever makes you happy. But why her? Even though we've been together for so long…she just doesn't want anyone else to want him.”
— Jennifer Wilbanks (03:10)
Quote:
“Once…when we were first together, [she] tried to talk me out of being with him because she thought that he wasn't ready for a relationship.” — Jennifer Wilbanks (06:29)
Quotes:
“You should only be thinking about the fiancé instead of you and your girlfriends having to give the evil eye...You don’t have to be playing those games.”
— Host (10:34)
“It's your day, and you are allowed. Your wedding is one of the few times you're allowed to be completely selfish.”
— Co-host 1 (10:41)
Quotes:
“If you've got somebody at your wedding that there's a possibility [they’ll object], cut it off before it even happens.”
— Host (13:39)
“Whether she is or not, I think is insignificant...She's the bride.”
— Co-host 2 (14:54)
Quote:
“Once you propose and she says yes, get out of the way...whatever the woman wants for the wedding gets.”
— Host, joking but earnestly (15:17)
Quote:
“Be selfish. You're the bride.”
— Co-host 2 (18:03)
On Male Blind Spots:
“Guys understate everything. Where women...see into things more than we do or see them for what they are more than we do. I think we’re pretty basic creatures.”
— Host (08:31)
Analogy with Own Experience:
“If I could do it all over again, I would have said to her, I don't want him there. I just don't want him there.”
— Host referencing his own wedding (09:49)
On Boundaries:
“If you're going to be uncomfortable—even a little bit—on your own wedding day, then you got to eliminate what's going to make you uncomfortable.”
— Host (17:39)
Pop Culture Reference:
“She's living the Julia Roberts side of that movie, you know? This other woman is the Bird Show.”
— Co-host 2, alluding to My Best Friend’s Wedding, (18:29)
The conversation is light, funny, and real, with plenty of ribbing, supportive advice, and relatable confessions. Hosts maintain a grounded, empathetic perspective while encouraging Jennifer to trust her gut, set boundaries, and not let social pressures overshadow her happiness on her wedding day.
This episode offers a candid, often humorous exploration of wedding-day jitters and boundary-setting with exes. The Bert Show crew, supported by listener input, lands firmly on the side of the bride: It’s her day, her comfort, her call. Their advice—both practical and emotional—highlights the challenge of managing old friendships in new relationships and underscores the importance of prioritizing self in moments that matter.