The Bert Show — "Vault: She Has Beef With Her Fiancé's Ex-Girlfriend"
Date: January 12, 2026
Host: Pionaire Podcasting
Main Cast: Bert, Kristin, Abby, Cassie, Tommy, and rotating co-hosts
Main Guest: "Jennifer Wilbanks" (caller, using a voice disguiser)
Episode Overview
This episode dives into a classic relationship dilemma: A bride-to-be, using the pseudonym "Jennifer Wilbanks," seeks advice about her fiancé's best friend—a woman he once dated—attending their imminent wedding. The discussion focuses on jealousy, boundaries in relationships, wedding day anxieties, and whether Jennifer’s worries amount to pre-wedding nerves or signal deeper issues. The Bert Show team and several listeners weigh in, exploring gender perspectives, the “right to be selfish” at your own wedding, and where to draw boundaries with exes.
Key Discussion Points and Insights
1. Jennifer’s Dilemma: The Setup
- Jennifer has known her fiancé since she was three years old; they've been together for three years and have a child.
- The fiancé’s long-time best friend is also his ex-girlfriend from high school. She remains close with him and his family.
- When he told his ex about the engagement, she replied, “Do whatever makes you happy, but why her?” (03:28)
- The ex is coming to the wedding, sparking Jennifer’s anxiety about possible drama or even a disruption during the ceremony.
Quote:
“He has a best friend that he actually dated in high school...But when he told her...she said, I guess, do whatever makes you happy. But why her? Even though we've been together for so long…she just doesn't want anyone else to want him.”
— Jennifer Wilbanks (03:10)
2. Concerns About the Ex’s Intentions
- Jennifer admits the ex has a pattern of undermining her relationship—trying to talk her out of dating her fiancé early on and having a “snooty” attitude.
- She’s worried her friends will have to watch the ex at the wedding in case of drama (04:49).
- Jennifer wonders if she’s overreacting or if this is a genuine red flag.
Quote:
“Once…when we were first together, [she] tried to talk me out of being with him because she thought that he wasn't ready for a relationship.” — Jennifer Wilbanks (06:29)
3. Host and Co-host Perspectives
- Hosts suggest Jennifer is justified in her feelings, noting that having an ex at the wedding is a common friction point.
- Discussion of gender differences: The men argue that guys may be oblivious to subtext or drama while women pick up on more (08:08–09:17).
- The team questions why Jennifer didn’t set firmer boundaries earlier or communicate this discomfort clearly.
Quotes:
“You should only be thinking about the fiancé instead of you and your girlfriends having to give the evil eye...You don’t have to be playing those games.”
— Host (10:34)
“It's your day, and you are allowed. Your wedding is one of the few times you're allowed to be completely selfish.”
— Co-host 1 (10:41)
4. Listener Calls and Advice
- Amanda: Suggests Jennifer uninvite the ex, emphasizing that “you can't have exes in the relationship, and you definitely can't have them at the wedding.” (12:27)
- Ray: Raises the idea of skipping the “any objections” part of the wedding ceremony to avoid potential disruption (13:00).
- Host disagrees, saying if there’s even a possibility of an outburst, that person shouldn’t be attending at all (13:39).
- Another caller, Omar, claims Jennifer is making a mountain out of a molehill (14:19), while co-hosts argue that, regardless, her comfort is what matters: it’s her day.
Quotes:
“If you've got somebody at your wedding that there's a possibility [they’ll object], cut it off before it even happens.”
— Host (13:39)
“Whether she is or not, I think is insignificant...She's the bride.”
— Co-host 2 (14:54)
5. The “Right to Be Selfish” Debate
- The consensus among hosts and most callers is that the bride has the right to prioritize her own peace of mind. If she feels uncomfortable—even if it’s “just” pre-wedding nerves—it matters.
- The conversation shifts to whether Jennifer’s fiancé would make this a big issue if asked to uninvite the friend. Jennifer is sure he would (16:40).
Quote:
“Once you propose and she says yes, get out of the way...whatever the woman wants for the wedding gets.”
— Host, joking but earnestly (15:17)
6. Final Thoughts and Support
- Jennifer wonders if she’s blowing things out of proportion but is reassured by the hosts that her feelings are valid, and she should listen to them (15:37–16:13).
- Host Bert shares his regret about ignoring similar discomfort at his own wedding, advising Jennifer not to make the same mistake (17:44, 17:52).
- Cast closes with encouraging Jennifer to be “selfish” on her wedding day and to eliminate anything that makes her uncomfortable.
Quote:
“Be selfish. You're the bride.”
— Co-host 2 (18:03)
Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments
-
On Male Blind Spots:
“Guys understate everything. Where women...see into things more than we do or see them for what they are more than we do. I think we’re pretty basic creatures.”
— Host (08:31) -
Analogy with Own Experience:
“If I could do it all over again, I would have said to her, I don't want him there. I just don't want him there.”
— Host referencing his own wedding (09:49) -
On Boundaries:
“If you're going to be uncomfortable—even a little bit—on your own wedding day, then you got to eliminate what's going to make you uncomfortable.”
— Host (17:39) -
Pop Culture Reference:
“She's living the Julia Roberts side of that movie, you know? This other woman is the Bird Show.”
— Co-host 2, alluding to My Best Friend’s Wedding, (18:29)
Important Timestamps
- 02:48–05:08: Jennifer explains the backstory and why the ex's presence is unsettling.
- 06:09–07:55: Co-hosts dig into the ex’s history and motives.
- 08:31–09:49: Hosts discuss gender perspectives and personal wedding anecdotes.
- 12:03–14:16: Listener calls with advice and their own experiences.
- 15:09–17:44: Final advice, reflection, and Jennifer’s response.
- 17:52–End: Cast reflects and wraps up the segment with a call for Jennifer to put herself first.
Tone & Style
The conversation is light, funny, and real, with plenty of ribbing, supportive advice, and relatable confessions. Hosts maintain a grounded, empathetic perspective while encouraging Jennifer to trust her gut, set boundaries, and not let social pressures overshadow her happiness on her wedding day.
Summary
This episode offers a candid, often humorous exploration of wedding-day jitters and boundary-setting with exes. The Bert Show crew, supported by listener input, lands firmly on the side of the bride: It’s her day, her comfort, her call. Their advice—both practical and emotional—highlights the challenge of managing old friendships in new relationships and underscores the importance of prioritizing self in moments that matter.
