Vault: She Knows He's Cheating and Following Him to Virgina

Summary

The Bert Show Podcast Summary

Episode: Vault: She Knows He's Cheating and Following Him to Virginia
Date: May 22, 2026

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Overview

This episode of The Bert Show dives into the theme of "stepping into psycho"—listeners confessing their extraordinary, sometimes borderline-obsessive actions to catch or test faithfulness in their relationships. The main stories focus on two women employing high-stakes tactics to confirm suspicions of infidelity: one is literally trailing her boyfriend across state lines, and another contemplates digital espionage via spyware. The tone is lively, humorous, and somewhat incredulous, with the cast oscillating between supportive banter and gentle ribbing.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. What Constitutes "Stepping Into Psycho"?

• Hosts introduce the segment as a playful exploration of the lengths people go to when trust breaks down; the focus is not judgment, but curiosity ("this isn't a segment to judge the psycho. This is just... our ride with her." — Radio Host, 04:11).

• Commonly accepted ‘mild’ actions: drive-bys, casual snooping.

• ‘Psycho’ line: damaging property, serious cyberstalking, full-scale monitoring, or cross-state tailing.

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2. Mary’s Story: “Tailing My Boyfriend to Virginia”

[Starts ~02:06]

Motivations and Methods

• Mary suspects her boyfriend is cheating with a high school acquaintance through Facebook and email.
• She confesses to hacking his email ("I kinda hacked into his email a little bit." — Mary, 02:24) by guessing multiple passwords.
• Discovery: “They've been having a little bit of cyber sex” and the other woman sent him an explicit photo. ("The boob shot is with her boobs out and her fingers in her mouth. Like she wants him to come and get it." — Mary, 03:35)

The Confrontation Plan

• Mary plans to follow her boyfriend to Virginia to see if he visits the other woman, despite his claim that he's attending a concert with friends in a different city.
• She considers damaging the woman’s car and her boyfriend’s rental (“I plan on ruining her car a little bit and ruining the rental car that he has...” — Mary, 04:45).

Hosts’ Reaction

• Amused, worried, and barely able to believe her level of commitment.
• Caution: “Be careful and good luck, and don’t go to jail. May the force be with you. Godspeed, man.” — Co-host 1, 06:32

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3. Julie’s Story: “Installing Spyware on My Almost-Ex”

[Starts ~07:13]

Motivations and Approach

• Julie is in a “limbo” with her ex-boyfriend; not fully back together, but not apart.

• She suspects he’s seeing others because he’s less available.

• Her brother proposes a spyware solution—cloning his laptop to monitor all activity (email, Facebook, IMs).

  “He suggested, my brother suggested, why don’t I go and buy the same exact laptop ... my brother has the idea that he can install some kind of spy software ... so I could see for sure.” — Julie, 08:29

• The show discusses the technical side, referencing real services: “We’re gonna be working with a company called BigDaddySpy.com ... you can read text messages ... listen to voicemail” — Radio Host, 09:52

Moral and Emotional Conflict

• Julie admits discomfort with the idea:

  “I’m kind of getting nauseous even talking about it because this is not the type of thing that I do, and this feels a little desperate to me, but I’m doing it anyway.” — Julie, 12:52

Duration and Justification

• She plans to keep the spyware running until she finds evidence (“...if it doesn’t happen Sunday, I’d like it to happen Monday. Tuesday.” — Julie, 13:34).
• On whether she’ll uninstall once she has her answer: “Hell, no.” — Julie, 13:21

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• "I accidentally guessed 79 passwords, and the 80th was his. Accidentally." — Caller/Commentator sarcastically narrating Mary’s “hacking” (02:35)
• "The boob shot is with her boobs out and her fingers in her mouth. Like she wants him to come and get it." — Mary, 03:35
• “May the force be with you. Godspeed, man.” — Co-host 1, showing a mix of concern and amusement (06:32)
• "He suggested ... spy software where I can see exactly what my boyfriend is doing..." — Julie, 08:29
• "If you do this, you gotta get all, like, MTV Dramatical on him..." — Caller/Commentator, offering faux-advice to Mary (05:40)
• "Those couldn't be any better examples of what stepping into psycho is. Yeah than those two right there." — Radio Host, closing the segment (14:06)

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Important Timestamps

• 01:30 — Hosts introduce “Stepping Into Psycho” stories
• 02:06 — Mary’s call begins
• 03:35 — Explicit evidence described by Mary
• 04:45 — Mary’s “revenge” plans detailed
• 06:32 — Hosts react with caution and humor
• 07:13 — Julie’s call begins
• 08:29 — Spyware laptop plot explained
• 09:52 — Technical talk about cyber-spying
• 12:52 — Julie expresses discomfort/conflict
• 13:21 — Julie says she won’t uninstall the spyware
• 14:06 — Segment wrap-up and tease for Monday follow-up

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Tone and Style

• Tone is light, irreverent, and candid, with a strong undercurrent of “let’s just see what happens.”
• The show alternates between empathy for the callers’ pain and amused disbelief at the lengths they go.
• Listeners are encouraged to “ride along” rather than judge.

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Conclusion

This episode provides a humorous but thought-provoking look at relationship paranoia and boundary crossing, spotlighting two women taking extreme (and arguably unhealthy) measures to uncover the truth. The Bert Show treats the stories with both entertainment value and a hint of bewildered concern, promising follow-ups to see how far these real-life dramas go.

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For further updates on Mary and Julie’s investigations, tune in on Monday at 7:30am as promised by the hosts.

Transcript

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[Radio Host]

The Bird show all right, so you're planning on stepping into Psycho this weekend. It's pretty meditated. You're normally pretty cool about things, but you've just been pushed. So this is the weekend you're gonna do something about it. Kind of crazy.

[Co-host 1]

And we're talking about more than just the drive by because everybody's done the drive by, you know, see if their car's there, see if the lights are on at home. If you put anybody else's car is there.

[Co-host 2]

If you put a key to the car, that's stepping into psycho.

[Radio Host]

Right. 404-741-Q100 and we'll put you on the voice disguiser here is Mary. Good morning.

[Julie]

Hello.

[Radio Host]

Hello.

[Mary]

I'm not that crazy.

[Radio Host]

Well, we'll determine that.

[Mary]

Okay. I'm tailing my boyfriend to Virginia.

[Radio Host]

Oh, yes, you are.

[Co-host 1]

Yes, you're right. Why?

[Co-host 2]

Why?

[Mary]

Because, okay, I saw this thing on Facebook. It said, don't let Facebook ruin your relationship.

[Julie]

Okay.

[Mary]

He is cheating on me through Facebook with a girl that we went to high school with. And I kind of hacked into his email a little bit.

[Radio Host]

Kinda.

[Caller/Commentator]

I accidentally guessed 79 passwords, and the 80th was his. Accidentally.

[Radio Host]

Now, what exactly did you see on his Facebook page that makes you think that he's.

[Mary]

I found out that they've been having a little bit of cyber sex.

[Co-host 1]

Oh, that's gross.

[Radio Host]

Did you see the actual.

[Mary]

And the email she wrote? I had a really fun time talking with you. I've never been that intimate with anybody on the Internet ever before in my life.

[Co-host 2]

That'll ruin a keyboard.

[Radio Host]

Maybe she was sharing feelings.

[Mary]

No, because she said she sent him a picture of her boobs.

[Weight Loss Advertiser]

Well, that was pretty much a dead giveaway.

[Caller/Commentator]

Now, was that. Do you know if that was intentional? Because sometimes, you know, if you're just trying to launch a program or whatever, that'll accidentally happen.

[Co-host 1]

Right? Yeah, you.

[Radio Host]

Maybe she's having, like, throat problems, and she was taking a picture of her throat to show him to get, you know, like, a second opinion, and she accidentally slipped and went a little south on it.

[Mary]

Yeah.

[Julie]

Okay.

[Mary]

The boob shot is with her boobs out and her fingers in her mouth. Like she wants him to come and get it.

[Co-host 1]

Oh, dang. Why don't you just break up with this guy? Why are you following him to Virginia?

[Mary]

To figure this out.

[Co-host 1]

Right.

[Mary]

I am gonna break up with him. I just wanna see if he's really going there. He said he was going there to see her, but he also said that he was gonna go to, like, to a concert with his friends. Like, the guy friends.

[Co-host 2]

He told her he was gonna see

[Mary]

where she lives, so I just want to see where she lives.

[Co-host 2]

Did he tell you that he's going up there to see her?

[Mary]

No, he said that he was going to Virginia, and then he said that he was gonna go to see her in the email.

[Radio Host]

All right, this isn't a segment, and this isn't a segment to judge the psycho. This is just. This is our ride with her.

[Co-host 1]

Yeah, let's go.

[Radio Host]

Yeah, I mean, take the trip. You know, these things, they rarely. Rarely work out, though. Like, you have to be a private investigator, and, I mean, you gotta be trained to Tail somebody without getting caught.

[Mary]

Oh, my God. One of my ex boyfriends was a police officer. I know how to tail a few people. I've done it maybe once or twice.

[Co-host 1]

Mary, here's my question. If you tail him all the way to her house and he's at her house, then what's your plan? Because I know you're not just gonna sit in the driveway.

[Mary]

Well, no, actually, I plan on ruining her car a little bit and ruining the rental car that he has and then going to my family, because my family lives in Virginia, and I've been to Virginia like 20 times already, so.

[Radio Host]

And where has he told you he's going this weekend?

[Mary]

He said Hampton. Cause there's a Hampton Coliseum, and he's gonna go to a college car a concert there. But the chick doesn't live in Hampton. She lives in Norfolk.

[Co-host 2]

Norfolk.

[Caller/Commentator]

Why you gotta have such hatred for Hampton?

[Co-host 2]

I know Hampton.

[Caller/Commentator]

She said he was going to Hampton.

[Co-host 1]

Did he even tell you what concert he was allegedly going to?

[Julie]

No, he didn't.

[Mary]

Because I went to the kids concert when they were in Hampton, and I haven't heard of any other concerts being played since then. So that's why I'm suspicious. Like, there are no concerts. Cause the last one I was at was the kids concert, and there is nothing there.

[Radio Host]

You're part of the Kiss army. You're in the know.

[Caller/Commentator]

If you do this. If you do this, then you gotta get all, like, MTV Dramatical on him. And when you.

[Mary]

And I'm gonna bring a video camera, too.

[Co-host 2]

Perfect.

[Radio Host]

This is good stuff.

[Caller/Commentator]

And. And you need to bust in there, and you need to say, I got a concert for you. It's called I'm about to beat this Girl's ass.

[Mary]

Yeah.

[Caller/Commentator]

Concert Palooza.

[Mary]

If I. Cause if. If he. Cause he's. He says that there's, like, nothing going on or whatever, that they're just talking on the Internet. And then I said, well, I saw your emails. He's like, no, he didn't. And then he erased them before I got back up there through his phone. He erased them. And then when I got. When he got back up there to show me the emails, they weren't there.

[Radio Host]

Mary, let me do this. Let me put you on hold. You are a perfect, perfect candidate to follow in your stepping into psycho weekend. Okay? So we'll get your phone number, and then we'll talk to you on Monday, and we'll see how you executed the plan. Okay?

[Mary]

Okay.

[Co-host 1]

Be careful and good luck, and don't go to jail. May the force be with You Godspeed, man.

[Co-host 2]

I love how with stepping into Psycho that we get the whole lowdown, like we're the girlfriend. Okay. Oh, my God. And so then, okay, he erases through his phone and he erase a message as soon as I talk to him. And then, you know, there hadn't been a concert in Hampton in 15 years, but I wouldn't say kids. And there's no concert anymore.

[Radio Host]

Well, you know why that is? Because you're justifying your own craziness.

[Co-host 2]

Yes, of course.

[Radio Host]

Because you normally wouldn't do this. But here's the evidence that has pushed me into being psycho. The only thing there is that she said she's trailed two or three other guys before, so that's not stepping into Psycho. You're there.

[Co-host 2]

This is not out of character for her.

[Radio Host]

Good morning. Julie, you're on the voice disguiser.

[Julie]

Hey, guys. How are you?

[Radio Host]

Good, how are you?

[Julie]

I'm okay. I don't know what I'm doing, but

[Co-host 1]

you don't sound nearly as comfortable.

[Julie]

I'll tell you. Anyway, okay, so I'm kind of seeing my ex boyfriend. We're kind of on in a limbo area right now, so I think that alone is making me a little on edge.

[Co-host 1]

Anyway, you're in the midst of a relapse.

[Julie]

Yeah, we broke up. And then now we're kind of dating again or hanging out and I'm getting a little. I'm just wondering. He says he's not seeing anybody else, but I'm not completely sure. So anyway, that's where we are.

[Mary]

Okay.

[Julie]

But he. Black Friday, he had. He was so excited. He went and bought a new laptop. He had been planning on doing this for weeks and he was super excited. And he got the exact one he wanted. He didn't have to, like, get into a fist fight with anybody on Black Friday. And he got his laptop. So this is my brother's idea, by the way. I'm not completely the whole family stepping

[Caller/Commentator]

out of the justification number one.

[Radio Host]

Okay.

[Julie]

He's got, you know, my genetic makeup, so maybe we're both Disney. So he suggested, my brother suggested, why don't I go and buy the same exact laptop that my boyfriend or whatever ex boyfriend got? Because my brother has the idea that he can install some kind of spy software where I can see exactly what my boyfriend is doing, like on email and Facebook and any IM that he gets. Basically, the new laptop would be a mirror image. It would be like a clone of my boyfriend's laptop so I could see for sure. He says he's not seeing Anybody. But I don't 100% believe him, and we're not 100% back together.

[Caller/Commentator]

So what do you do? You buy the laptop and put the stuff on it, but then you have to swap the laptops.

[Julie]

Yeah. So he's. He hasn't set his laptop yet. It's still in the box. But this weekend he's spending that. Now that Thanksgiving's over, he has the time to sit down and really get into it. And he's super excited. And I've asked him, like, when are

[Mary]

you gonna do it?

[Julie]

And he said, definitely this weekend. So as soon as he sets up his laptop, then my brother can come in and do. I mean, I'm not a computer genius. My brother is.

[Radio Host]

So this apparently is pretty easy. We're gonna be working with a company called Big Daddy spy.com over the next couple of weeks, and this is apparently pretty easy to do.

[Co-host 1]

Really?

[Radio Host]

Like, install the. Yeah, I mean, you can. You can read text messages. You can listen to voicemail.

[Caller/Commentator]

Website kind of freaks me out.

[Radio Host]

Yeah, they've got everything there that you need. And this is apparently, if you know what you're doing with the computer, it's pretty easy stuff.

[Caller/Commentator]

Wow.

[Radio Host]

So are you assuming that the software will be installed this weekend and you will start to read the messages this weekend also?

[Julie]

I hope, like, if he does it tomorrow, you know, maybe Sunday, I'll get some information.

[Caller/Commentator]

So how. So your brother has to explain to me how this is gonna work. Like your brother. You bought you.

[Julie]

My brother's my. I'm not completely sure, but my brother assures me that once my boyfriend sets up his computer and we set up my new laptop, then we swap them out, and maybe he installed something on my boyfriend's computer, too, so that I can monitor it from my laptop.

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[Julie]

Wow. Yeah, I mean, it's not good.

[Radio Host]

I'm curious. Maybe I checked out for this part of the conversation. What has he done to make you feel like he's doing something wrong, that you have to. To install this on his computer?

[Julie]

Just stuff like he's not 100% available all the time. Like, he. You know, I'll be like, last minute, I'll be like, oh, let's hang out tonight. He's like, oh, I can't. I'm like, oh, are you hanging out with Chris? And he's like, no. So he's not really giving. He's not letting me in, you know, to his world like he was before. And he was never like that. So I'm like, okay, so are you hiding something? That's my.

[Co-host 1]

But is he really hiding anything if you guys aren't officially back together?

[Julie]

Well, I mean, are we gonna go forward or are we not? That's what this whole thing is about. Like, I wanna know, am I gonna trust you and know that we're gonna be together together, or am I just gonna be one of two or three people? And I don't wanna do that.

[Co-host 1]

So quick question. When did you. How long ago did you guys break up?

[Julie]

We broke up, like, in, I don't know, maybe three or four months ago. But we were always talking, like, during the breakup because we had been dating for two years and we were best friends and going out and so, you know, naturally hanging out and talking to each other. You know, we still love each other, so it kind of develop.

[Radio Host]

And remember, this is not an advice segment. No, we're just going along with the journey.

[Co-host 1]

Right.

[Co-host 2]

And I do want to ask you a question, having never spied on anybody like that before. So how. How long do you spy to get evidence on whether you should move forward with him or not? Like, I'm just curious if this weekend you think you're going to get enough information to move forward?

[Julie]

I think so, because obviously I can read all his email. I can go into his private messages on Facebook. I mean, I'm kind of getting nauseous even talking about it because this is not the type of thing that I do, and this feels a little desperate to me, but I'm doing it anyway.

[Radio Host]

You're good. So if you don't get the information this weekend, will you uninstall all the stuff that you're gonna put on it?

[Julie]

I don't know.

[Co-host 1]

That's gonna be a no.

[Julie]

Hell, no.

[Co-host 2]

That is like me having this huge brownie fudge dessert in front of me, and I was going to take a bite.

[Caller/Commentator]

Yeah.

[Co-host 2]

Crap.

[Mary]

Yeah.

[Co-host 2]

I don't know if I. I mean, the whole thing.

[Julie]

Honey, point of doing all this is so I can find something. So I'm not. If it doesn't happen Sunday, I'd like it to happen Monday. Tuesday.

[Mary]

I.

[Co-host 2]

That's kind of what I was asking.

[Radio Host]

Yeah. So you're looking for something to stay out of the relationship?

[Co-host 2]

Yes.

[Julie]

I'd like to be back with him, but if there's something out there, I'm not interested.

[Co-host 1]

Okay.

[Radio Host]

This is the pure definition of what we're looking for right here.

[Co-host 1]

Perfect.

[Co-host 2]

We'll see you on Monday.

[Radio Host]

Okay, Julie, thank you very much for sharing. Let me put you on hold, and we'll get your phone number and we'll find out how everything works out on Monday, okay?

[Julie]

Okay, thanks.

[Radio Host]

Those couldn't be any better examples of what stepping in a psycho is. Yeah than those two right there. So we will check back in with them Monday morning at 7:30 and find out how it all went.

[Bretzky]

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