Vault: She Needs To Have An Intervention With Her Mom

Summary

---

The Bert Show – Vault: She Needs To Have An Intervention With Her Mom

Date: December 31, 2025
Host: Burt (and The Bert Show Cast)
Guest/Caller: Sarah
Main Theme: Familial boundaries, interventions, and the consequences of confronting loved ones with hard truths.

---

Episode Overview

This episode centers on Sarah, a listener who reached out to The Bert Show to share her experience attempting an "intervention" with her mother’s fiancé. Sarah's motivation: her mother's history of infidelity and multiple failed marriages, and a desire to prevent the fiancé from future harm. The conversation explores motivations, emotional fallout, the ethics of intervening in another adult’s relationship, and listener reactions, delving into complex family dynamics and the fallout from trying to "save" others from themselves.

---

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Sarah's Motivation and Background

• Sarah, 28, describes her mother as someone who "uses men" and has a consistent pattern of infidelity in all her marriages. The family is now facing the mother’s fourth marriage, which Sarah believes is doomed to repeat past mistakes.
• Quote [01:51, Sarah]:
  “He's a great guy. He's a sweetheart. But my mom will cheat on him.”
• Sarah feels compelled to intervene for the fiancé’s protection, based on “her mother’s pattern.”

2. Planning and Executing the Intervention

• Sarah organizes the intervention with her brother and his wife, deciding to confront the fiancé directly about their mother’s history without the mother present at first.

• The fiancé becomes uncomfortable and asks for the mother to be present for the discussion. This escalates the situation.

• Quote [03:24, Sarah]:
  “We were really positive at first...we loved both of them together, but we didn’t think that them getting married was the right decision.”

3. The Intervention Goes Sideways

• The mother arrives, feels attacked, and starts drinking wine, escalating tensions.
• Arguments devolve: the brother’s wife storms out, the brother leaves, and Sarah is left alone with her intoxicated and angry mother.
• Quote [07:55, Sarah]:
  “...she’s drank like a whole bottle of wine. It’s not pretty. We’re kind of going at it and then past situations start coming up.”
• Old wounds reopen, including Sarah’s feelings around her mother's betrayals.

4. Family Fallout

• The intervention ends with Sarah being kicked out by the fiancé. Communication between all parties (except the mother and her fiancé) breaks down.

• Quote [08:41, Sarah]:
  “...my mom’s fiancé kicks me out. What a mess.”

• Many listeners and cast members challenge Sarah, suggesting her actions might have been driven more by unresolved issues with her mother than by concern for the fiancé.

• Quote [10:27, Listener]:
  "You're an adult now, and you have your own relationships going on...Who are you to decide whether or not she should be married, ever?"

5. Listener and Host Response – Perspectives on Boundaries

• Hosts and callers debate whether Sarah did the right thing:

  • Many argue she should have spoken to her mother privately instead of confronting the fiancé.
  • Others empathize, referencing family history and the urge to prevent more pain.
  • Quote [13:26, Caller Carla]: "She just completely went about this the wrong way... But to go to him behind her back? Of course she feels betrayed. Who wouldn’t?"

• Sarah explains she’s tried talking to her mother before; nothing changed.

• Discussion centers on whether adults have the right (or obligation) to interfere in other adults’ relationships. The hosts repeatedly emphasize the complexity and emotional risk of family interventions.

6. Reflections and Takeaways

• Burt and the cast reflect on how confronting loved ones can backfire, leading to greater rifts or unintended consequences.

• Quote [15:21, Burt]: "As a parent, the only thing you hope for as your children get older is that they still honor you and...understand you. And...to hear the disappointment and...betrayal actually come out of my own child's mouth...would cut to the core for me."

• The hosts and listeners highlight that Sarah’s choice may have strengthened the alliance between her mother and the fiancé, the opposite of her intention.

• Quote [12:59, Host]: “Do you feel like this whole thing last night caused more of an alliance between her and her fiancé? The opposite of what you were trying to do?”
  Sarah: “Yes.”

• Quote [13:04, Host]: "Nothing good came of this."

7. Sarah’s State and Next Steps

• Sarah is numb, not sure what to do next, and uncertain whether she can repair the relationship with her mother.

• Quote [17:32, Sarah]:
  “I really don’t have a goal anymore.”

• The show encourages her to let time pass and hopes to keep in touch for updates.

---

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• [01:51, Sarah]: "He's a great guy. He's a sweetheart. But my mom will cheat on him."
• [07:55, Sarah]: "So my brother...leaves. Okay, so I'm left there."
• [08:41, Sarah]: "What a mess."
• [10:27, Listener]: "Who are you to decide whether or not she should be married, ever?"
• [13:26, Carla]: "She completely went behind her mother's back...Of course she feels betrayed."
• [15:21, Burt]: "To hear the disappointment and...betrayal actually come out of my own child's mouth...would cut to the core for me."
• [17:32, Sarah]: “I really don’t have a goal anymore.”
• [12:26, Listener Andy]: “You got off topic. You exposed years and years of historical feeling, and it turned into a lashing between your mom and kids versus what you were there to do.”

---

Timestamps for Key Segments

• [01:02]: Host recaps setup from previous show and introduces Sarah’s dilemma.
• [03:24]: Sarah recaps the intervention as it unfolds.
• [05:59]: The escalation after the mother arrives.
• [08:41]: Sarah is kicked out, reflecting on the chaos.
• [10:27]: Listener call-in challenging Sarah’s authority.
• [12:26]: Listener suggests the family’s emotional baggage overtook the main issue.
• [13:26]: Carla criticizes Sarah's approach and motive.
• [15:21]: Burt reflects on the pain of betrayal between parents and grown children.
• [17:32]: Sarah admits she no longer knows what she wants.
• [18:11]: Listeners call in to support Sarah's actions.
• [19:58]: Burt closes the discussion, thanking Sarah.

---

Themes and Emotional Tone

• The episode balances serious, raw emotional conversations with humor and honesty, characteristic of The Bert Show.
• There is significant self-reflection—from hosts and Sarah alike—on the messy realities of family, personal boundaries, and intergenerational traumas.
• The listener call-ins provide a wide range of perspectives, from tough love to outright empathy.

---

Takeaways

• Family interventions are rarely clean or neat; motives are often mixed, and outcomes unpredictable.
• Sometimes, attempts to protect can cause more harm, strengthening the very bonds one hopes to break.
• The episode highlights the importance of boundaries and the need to confront issues directly rather than through third parties.
• In family conflict, old wounds resurface easily, and actions can have far-reaching consequences beyond the initial intention.

---

For listeners who haven’t heard the episode:
This Bert Show episode unpacks the fallout when adult children intervene in a parent’s relationship. It’s an emotional, relatable conversation that exposes the tangled web of family loyalty, pain, and the complications of "doing the right thing" for someone you love—even when it’s not your place.

Transcript

[Blue Apron Announcer]

Here at Blue Apron, we know exactly how hectic school nights can be. That's why we created Assemble and Bake delicious one pan meals that make family dinner simple. Just assemble the pre chopped ingredients and put the pan in the oven to bake. Then you're free to help out with that last minute diorama. Shop. Assemble and [e-mail], get 50% off your first two orders with code APRON50. Terms and conditions apply. Visit blueapron.com terms for more.

[Pets Best Announcer]

Protect your pet with insurance from Pets Best plans start from less than a dollar a day.

[Caller/Listener 1]

Visit petsbest.com Pet insurance products offered and.

[Pets Best Announcer]

Administered by Pets Best Insurance Services, LLC are underwritten by American Pet Insurance Company or Independence American Insurance Company. For terms and conditions, visit www.petsbest.com. policy products are underwritten by American Pet Insurance Company, Independence American Insurance Company or Ms. Transverse Insurance Company and administered by Pets Best Insurance Services LLC. $1.00 a day premium based on 2024.

[Caller/Listener 1]

Average new policy, accident and illness plans.

[Pets Best Announcer]

Pets age 0 to 10.

[Burt (Host)]

The bird show all right, let's recap quickly. Yesterday we got into talking about family interventions when a woman named Sarah gave us a call and told us she was on the brink of doing one of these herself. Hey, Sarah, you're on all the hits. Q100. Hi.

[Sarah (Caller with intervention story)]

I'm actually working up the courage for my own intervention. And this is actually with my mom's fiance. This will be if it goes through my mother's fourth marriage. And I love my mother, honestly, but it's a pattern with my mom. My mom uses men.

[Caller/Listener 2]

You're doing the intervention, you're intervening with your mom or you're intervening with the man your mom wants to marry?

[Sarah (Caller with intervention story)]

The man my mom wants to marry.

[Caller/Listener 1]

Are you gonna tell him to leave or not marry her?

[Sarah (Caller with intervention story)]

He's a great guy. He's a sweetheart. But my mom will cheat on him.

[Caller/Listener 1]

Oh.

[Sarah (Caller with intervention story)]

Oh, she has done. She did it to my dad. She did it to my stepdad. She has a view of men that it's like, you know, if she. She feels that marriage is something that's not natural and that if she starts to get unhappy, she just goes out of the marriage.

[Burt (Host)]

Well, if she thinks that marriage isn't natural, why is she getting married?

[Sarah (Caller with intervention story)]

Because she likes to have somebody around.

[Burt (Host)]

Go ahead, Nikki. You're on the Burt Show.

[Sarah (Caller with intervention story)]

I'd like to commend her for deciding to take a stance on what is right and what is wrong. I think that she's doing the right thing. I think it takes A lot of guts.

[Burt (Host)]

Hey, Sarah. Here's what I want to do with you, Sarah. I want to get your phone number, and I want you to give us a call back right before you're about to do this intervention thing, and then we'll talk to you after it also.

[Sarah (Caller with intervention story)]

Okay, that sounds good.

[Burt (Host)]

Now, when we left the show yesterday, it was gonna be months before she had that intervention. Then I got an instant message from Tracy saying that, you know what? She can get in touch with her brother. She was gonna do it last night, and we felt.

[Caller/Listener 1]

I mean, I mentioned how it's probably better for her to do it last night because her, the mother, and the fiance were gonna get married in about two months. So the longer she waited, the closer to the wedding date she was gonna get.

[Burt (Host)]

Hey, Sarah.

[Sarah (Caller with intervention story)]

Hi.

[Burt (Host)]

Good morning. Thanks for joining us again.

[Sarah (Caller with intervention story)]

Sure.

[Burt (Host)]

So I'm guessing that you got in touch with your brother sometime yesterday, and you decided to pull the trigger on this thing.

[Sarah (Caller with intervention story)]

Yes.

[Burt (Host)]

Okay. You want to take it from there?

[Sarah (Caller with intervention story)]

Sure. Called my brother. He agreed to do it, and he agreed to bring his wife. So the three of us went to my mom's fiance's, and we started telling him this, and he felt very uncomfortable, you know, because my mom wasn't there. So he said, I really want your mother to be here for this. So he called my mother.

[Burt (Host)]

Okay, let's stop there for just a second. That's a good place to stop. All right. Just give us some details on some of the things that you were telling the fiance, like, where did you come from? What were some of the points that you. You brought up that, look, this is not a woman you want to marry.

[Sarah (Caller with intervention story)]

Well, you know what? We were really positive at first, you know, because we thought that would be a good method, you know, to start, like, you know, we told him how much we loved him. We said how much we loved my mom and how we loved both of them together, but we didn't think that them getting married was the right decision. And this is why, you know, that my mother, she. She deals with marriage in a very strange way. She probably should have never gotten married, but she did, and this is what she did in each of her marriages. That's how we approached it. So it wasn't like we really just railed on my mother.

[Burt (Host)]

You were just kind of establishing a pattern that she had in other relationships, and one of, like. I mean, the tone of this is more of protection than anything else.

[Sarah (Caller with intervention story)]

Protection, exactly. And, you know, we. We. The angle we went into, it was like, you know, we love you. And we love her, but it wasn't like, oh, my God, my mom is such a slut. And, you know, even though that's what you really think? Well, yeah.

[Pets Best Announcer]

Okay, I want to know. Even before that, like, before you even started talking to him about all this stuff, when you guys show up, the three of you, and knock on his door, what's his reaction to that in the first place?

[Sarah (Caller with intervention story)]

No, I called him.

[Pets Best Announcer]

You said you guys were coming over.

[Sarah (Caller with intervention story)]

Yeah.

[Pets Best Announcer]

And what'd you tell him you were coming over for? Wouldn't that be weird?

[Sarah (Caller with intervention story)]

I just said we, you know, we wouldn't. You know, we wanted to say hi. We wanted to talk. He didn't think anything of it.

[Caller/Listener 1]

Well, I would think he's about to marry their mother, so I don't know if that's weird. I mean, you said you already have a relationship with him, right?

[Sarah (Caller with intervention story)]

Oh, yeah. And I mean, like, I'll go to his place for dinner and vice versa. I mean, we're very close. That's the whole point of this. I mean, if I didn't really care for him that much, I'd be like, oh, fine. You know, your loss. You know, your mistake.

[Burt (Host)]

Okay, so you. The three of you, go over there. He's getting uncomfortable because you're starting to lay all this on him. And he says, look, this doesn't seem fair to me. Let's call your mother. And that's what you do, right? Okay, let's go ahead into chapter two, Round two.

[Caller/Listener 2]

Ding, ding.

[Sarah (Caller with intervention story)]

So my mom comes, and, you know, immediately my mom felt threatened. She couldn't believe that we were there. She couldn't believe what we were talking about. I. My mom likes wine, okay? So she started popping the wine. She started downing a few glasses. So she started getting a little drunk and a little angry. And I just said, look. And my brother said it, too. Look, this is your history. We're just trying to help you. We were trying to help him. And my brother got a little mad at my mom for getting kind of drunk. She gets mean when she drinks. And she kind of berated him a bit, so he lashed out at her. And my brother's wife got mad at him because of the way he was speaking to her. So she storms out, okay, so his wife leaves, right? And then my brother and I are trying to deal with that, and my mom is still really upset. So then I ended up getting mad at my brother because of the way he was talking to his wife. So then he leaves. He's like, I'm done with this. And then he Leaves. Okay, so I'm left there.

[Caller/Listener 1]

Well, can I, can I make a few comments real quick? I. My only concern and is my, this is my same concern yesterday is the fact that you just sound like you're such the victim. Well, mom then start. She for some reason seemed, you know, threatened and then she started drinking wine and she got drunk and she got mad, you know, and it just seems to me that, I mean, you have to understand she's walking in into her entire family who is against her at this point and only her fiance is the one standing up for her. So you know, you're getting, I mean to me the brother's wife is the one that seemed to have some sense in that because she didn't think what was going on was right.

[Sarah (Caller with intervention story)]

Well, it gets better.

[Caller/Listener 1]

Okay.

[Pets Best Announcer]

Or worse.

[Burt (Host)]

Right?

[Sarah (Caller with intervention story)]

Worse. Okay. So my brother, I talked to my brother last, right? So then my mom and I now at this point she's just like, you know, she's drank like a whole bottle of wine. It's like, it's not pretty. We're kind of going at it and then past situations start coming up and I just telling her now how she never supported me and blah. It started to get into many other issues.

[Caller/Listener 1]

Bringing the whole basket of stuff in.

[Sarah (Caller with intervention story)]

Oh yeah, our whole lives like. And I got, I told, I just said about how I've never forgiven her for cheating on my father and it was bad. And my mom's fiance kicks me out.

[Burt (Host)]

What a mess.

[Sarah (Caller with intervention story)]

What a mess for talking to her like that. So the only people speaking are my mom and her fiance.

[Burt (Host)]

You gotta kinda look at this just for a second from her angle here. I mean, imagine the betrayal she must have felt when she walked in there and her children are talking this way about her. I mean, the sense of betrayal in that case must have been overwhelming to her.

[Sarah (Caller with intervention story)]

I guess so. But you know, honestly. Well, first of all, I'm so numb right now. I mean I went through like being. I was furious and then I started crying and now I'm just really numb. It's just like this man's going to marry my slutty mother. And you know, there's not. You say, oh, but you didn't live a life that we lived. You have no idea.

[Caller/Listener 1]

And that's true. That's true. I just, you know, one thing is, I think though you, you might have gotten down to the, the, the point, the first point of your looking down on. Upon your mother when you said that you never forgave her. I mean, I know it took an ugly situation for you to finally get that out. But I'm just wondering, is this whole time just because the betrayal on your father. You know what I mean? I mean.

[Sarah (Caller with intervention story)]

Oh, it's more. It's more than. It's, it's, you know, I mean, I don't want to get into all the details of my. The specifics of my mother not really being a mother, but that's the crux of it, you know? I mean, you know, not everybody's meant to be a parent. And my mom certainly wasn't meant to be a parent and wasn't meant to be married. And I, you know, I just feel bad she's going to ruin another man's life. But I guess so be it, right? We tried.

[Burt (Host)]

All right, Sarah, hold on here. A lot of calls are coming in, and I know you're kind of in a vulnerable state, but I hope you didn't hear, you didn't come here for a lot of comfort, because I don't think you're going to get it this morning. Good morning, Elizabeth. You're on the Bird show. All the hits. Q100.

[Sarah (Caller with intervention story)]

Hi. I'm sorry. How old are you? How old am I? Yeah. 28. 28. Okay, so you're an adult now, and you have your own relationships going on, and she's an adult. You need to let her have her own life. Who are you to decide whether or not she should be married ever?

[Burt (Host)]

I. I think that Melissa. I'm no psychologist, but I wonder if Melissa doesn't bring up a fantastic point that while there are a whole bunch. Yeah. The history here is the hurt of you from your childhood. I wonder if this wasn't you just kind of lashing back because your mom had the affairs on your dad.

[Sarah (Caller with intervention story)]

Well, you know, my brother was right there with me. It's the way she. It's a pattern she has of cheating on men, and she's already cheated on him. You know, for me to sit back and not do anything to a man I care about and why it would be like if you. Can you imagine if you had a daughter or a son and you knew they were making a huge mistake, wouldn't you confront them?

[Burt (Host)]

Well, I would go directly to my son or my daughter. I wouldn't go to the fiance.

[Pets Best Announcer]

Well, did the affair. Did the affair that she has already had on him, did that come out last night? Did you throw.

[Sarah (Caller with intervention story)]

What?

[Pets Best Announcer]

You said your mom already has had affair on her fiance?

[Sarah (Caller with intervention story)]

Yes, it came out last night. Oh, no, that didn't.

[Burt (Host)]

That did not come out.

[Sarah (Caller with intervention story)]

No.

[Burt (Host)]

Okay.

[Caller/Listener 2]

That's Good at least.

[Burt (Host)]

Yeah, at least you got that going for you. Good morning, Andy. You're on the Burt show. All the hits. Q100.

[Sarah (Caller with intervention story)]

Yeah, I totally feel like what she did was to try to protect him, but the problem was that you and the brother and the sister in law got off topic. You exposed years and years of historical feeling, and it turned into a lashing between your mom and kids versus what you were there to do, which was to protect the fiance. So I think that maybe you should have the conversation with your mom offhand and, you know, resolve what you guys have, because it sounds like it's just a lot of betrayal. And then maybe you can try to approach repair this. I don't know if you can even bring it up with the fiance again, but she just diverted from the topic.

[Burt (Host)]

That make any sense to you, Sarah?

[Sarah (Caller with intervention story)]

Well, it makes sense, but unfortunately, nobody's talking but my mom and her fiance.

[Burt (Host)]

What do you mean?

[Pets Best Announcer]

You feel like we're not.

[Sarah (Caller with intervention story)]

Nobody's speaking to anyone.

[Pets Best Announcer]

Do you feel like.

[Sarah (Caller with intervention story)]

Not like I can call up and be like, I'm sorry, Mom.

[Caller/Listener 1]

Why not?

[Burt (Host)]

Yeah, why not?

[Sarah (Caller with intervention story)]

She won't take my phone call.

[Burt (Host)]

Well, it's gonna take some time.

[Caller/Listener 1]

No, but. Doesn't mean you have to. Your actions can't be because of somebody else's reactions, you know?

[Pets Best Announcer]

Do you feel like this whole thing last night caused more of an alliance between her and her fiance? The opposite of what you were trying to do?

[Sarah (Caller with intervention story)]

Yes.

[Burt (Host)]

Yeah, I mean, essentially. I mean, if you look back at it, Sarah here, nothing good came of this.

[Sarah (Caller with intervention story)]

No, nothing. Except that we got our feelings out.

[Burt (Host)]

Yeah. I mean, there's something to be said for that. I think if they're genuine, I think.

[Caller/Listener 1]

Something good could have been. I don't think it's a wasted action. I think something good could eventually come out of it because she. I mean, your mom now sees how hurt you and you know, her two children are.

[Sarah (Caller with intervention story)]

And maybe they won't get married. Who knows?

[Burt (Host)]

Well, Carla, good morning. You're on the Burt show. All the hits. Q100.

[Blue Apron Announcer]

Hi.

[Sarah (Caller with intervention story)]

I just wanted to say. She just completely went about this the wrong way. She should have approached her mother first and pulled her mother aside and said, look, mom, you know, this is your history. Are you sure you're doing the right thing? You know, maybe you guys need to sit down and talk about this. But to go to him behind her back? Of course she feels betrayed. Who wouldn't? I wouldn't take her phone calls either. I mean, she completely went behind her mother's back. And tried to undermine, you know, the relationship that she has with this man. And she is a grown up and he's a grown up. And does he not have any idea, you know, certainly he knows that this is going to be her fourth marriage. Certainly he knows. Obviously she's not too great at it, but it's not your place to step. She's not your child. She's not your child. You know, maybe this will be different if she was your child, but she's an adult and for you to step in, of course she feels betrayed. Who wouldn't feel betrayed by that? First of all. And now you've ruined your relationship with these people that you claim to care so much about. I'm not even going to try to speak.

[Caller/Listener 2]

Have a good time.

[Sarah (Caller with intervention story)]

Can I talk?

[Burt (Host)]

Yeah, go ahead.

[Sarah (Caller with intervention story)]

Okay. First of all, just because you're an adult doesn't mean you act like an adult. And second of all, my mother and I have had conversations in the past about her behavior and she's completely oblivious to hurting other people.

[Caller/Listener 1]

But I think you just have to let it go.

[Caller/Listener 2]

Like if that your job to police that.

[Caller/Listener 1]

Yeah. You just go and live your life normally.

[Sarah (Caller with intervention story)]

In the last two marriages, I didn't do a thing. I became very close to this man. He became like my father. And I did not want to see him hurt.

[Caller/Listener 1]

See, I think that's where this all stems from. I really think that you associate every man that she marries with your father in that relationship.

[Caller/Listener 2]

You got to look out for you and stop looking out for your mom. Like, let her do what she's going to do. Just make your. Make sure yourself, you yourself are protected.

[Caller/Listener 1]

And the thing is, you feel like your mother betrayed your father. Well, you betrayed your mother last night.

[Burt (Host)]

Yeah, I mean, I can't imagine that kind of hurt. Like, as a parent, the only thing you hope for as your children get older is that they still honor you and they still understand you. And I mean, essentially, we want to be our children's heroes. And to hear the disappointment and to hear the betrayal actually come out of my own child's mouth that how much of a disappointment and how much I disapprove of their life and how that would just. It would cut to the core for me.

[Sarah (Caller with intervention story)]

Yeah, but you've never done anything bad to your children.

[Burt (Host)]

I'm just. What I'm saying here is.

[Sarah (Caller with intervention story)]

You know what I'm saying, though? But what I'm saying to you, idealistically.

[Burt (Host)]

What I'm saying to you is just to hear that kind of betrayal. I mean, if you approach your mom, that's one thing. That's not betrayal, that's confronting. But when you step out of the family and you talk to a third party about it, it takes it to a completely different element, even if they deserve it.

[Pets Best Announcer]

Like, I don't agree with. With her actions. Exactly. But in theory, what you're saying is that, like, if you apply it to your life, I mean, you've said some pretty bad things about your parents, but they weren't the best parents. So you're almost giving her the opposite of advice of your actions in the past.

[Burt (Host)]

I'm not exactly sure how that by me relaying what happened with my family is the same as going, like, right to my dad's girlfriend.

[Pets Best Announcer]

Okay, I don't think that it's the same thing, but just the advice that you were giving her, if you gave that to yourself, it would be different. You know what I mean?

[Burt (Host)]

No, because I confronted my dad. I wouldn't go ahead and confront him.

[Sarah (Caller with intervention story)]

Yeah, but how did your dad respond?

[Burt (Host)]

Terribly. Terribly.

[Sarah (Caller with intervention story)]

Okay. I confronted my mom. Do you. I mean, it depends on your relationship with his wife.

[Caller/Listener 1]

I just think. I don't know what you. What your agenda is. Like, what final goal are you trying to achieve? You did. You did your part by going to your mom. Okay, so your mom didn't respond to it. Okay, fine. Then you move on with your life. You did what you did. You did. You did what you could. I respect Burt because he directly went to his father and tried it on several occasions. He didn't get the happy ending he may have wanted, but at least he did it. And he's walked. You know, he walks away knowing he did the right thing for you. You know, I don't know. You keep going and you keep going. You think your mother's stubborn, you're being stubborn, too. And I don't know what you're end goal is.

[Sarah (Caller with intervention story)]

I really don't have a goal anymore.

[Caller/Listener 2]

I can't say. Because, you know, making it more personal, like Jen was doing with your family. Bert, like, I can't. Like, I can almost see where Jen's coming from, because I think if your dad found himself a great girl, but you knew that he didn't change his ways, and you love that girl. I could see you going to her. I could see you struggling with it, but I could see in the end you going like, look, I don't think you see this side of my dad, but this is what happened when I was growing up. And I know it's still going on now.

[Burt (Host)]

I Don't know. I can't deny that. Let me take a support call for you because you're taking a lot of.

[Caller/Listener 2]

Because you're getting your ass kicked.

[Burt (Host)]

Yeah, you're getting your ass kicked by our listeners. So let's at least get some representation from the other side before we move on. Good morning, Lisa.

[Sarah (Caller with intervention story)]

Hi. Good morning.

[Burt (Host)]

Hi.

[Sarah (Caller with intervention story)]

I wanted to call and say. Okay, look, maybe she didn't go about it the best way, but the fact is at least she's grown up with some morals, no thanks to her mother. And she feels a responsibility to tell this guy, look, this is how my mother is. You need to be aware whether she went to her mother or not, because she's probably tried to go to her mother before. She's gotten nowhere. So she felt responsible. She has a conscience and she has some roles.

[Burt (Host)]

All right, now the calls are starting to come in supporting you. Hey, Amanda.

[Sarah (Caller with intervention story)]

Hey. I totally agree with her. If my mother or my father had done that, I would absolutely do the same exact thing that she did. I absolutely agree with her.

[Caller/Listener 2]

I think she sold me.

[Burt (Host)]

She sold you on it. I keep seeing it that way.

[Caller/Listener 2]

How many chances does she give her mom to screw up someone else's life that affects her. Like your argument is, well, she's an adult.

[Burt (Host)]

I think this had very little to do with the fiance and had, like Melissa said, had everything to do with her relationship with her mom.

[Caller/Listener 2]

Well, we can only go by what she's saying, and she's saying it's not about the relationship with her mom.

[Caller/Listener 1]

So why, why? She said, I mean, like, I mean. Well, Jeff, you had the opinion, you know, similar to mine earlier, about she, you know, move on. Like, you're, you are an adult. You're a 28 year old woman that needs, instead of being so obsessed with your mother's relationship, move on. I mean, let it, let it evolve the way it's supposed to.

[Caller/Listener 2]

Because your mom is bringing people into your life. Like, that's your mom and she's bringing in a stepdad. Even if you are 28 years old. I mean, that's.

[Caller/Listener 1]

But she doesn't dictate the family. She's not the matriarch or the family. And she can't tell everybody what to.

[Caller/Listener 2]

Do if the mom is immature. Somebody has to be mature and sometimes that's the kid.

[Caller/Listener 1]

She's not. She's not her mom's mom.

[Pets Best Announcer]

Sorry.

[Burt (Host)]

Once again, these family things are so complicated. That's why endorse cut everybody off. Everybody, mothers, fathers, mothers, brothers, everybody. You don't have to worry about this. Hey Sarah.

[Sarah (Caller with intervention story)]

Yeah.

[Burt (Host)]

All right. Thank you for sharing with us. You certainly gave us something to chew on for a while. I'm sorry it didn't work out the way you, you liked it to, you.

[Caller/Listener 1]

Know, and it, it, it won't always be this way. I mean, let, let things simmer. But I mean it, things always change within a family and it can always get better. They can.

[Sarah (Caller with intervention story)]

No, I hear you. I'm gonna call, I'm gonna try to call him. So we'll see what happens.

[Burt (Host)]

We're gonna keep in touch with you. Cause I know we're gonna get a ton of emails from people that want to hear from you over the next couple of weeks. So we'll keep in touch with you. Is that cool?

[Sarah (Caller with intervention story)]

Cool.

[Caller/Listener 1]

Good luck. Thanks Sarah.

[Caller/Listener 2]

Good luck.

[Burt (Host)]

By the Birch show.

[Blue Apron Announcer]

So here's the thing with homemade meals. Eating them is great, but all the chopping and measuring and cleanup? Not so much. With new One Pan Assemble and Bake meals from Blue Apron, you get all the flavor of homemade meals with a fraction of the work. Just assemble the pre chopped ingredients, bake in the oven, and enjoy shop. Assemble and [e-mail] get 50% off your first two orders with code apron50. Terms and conditions apply. Visit blueapron.com terms for more.

[Sarah (Caller with intervention story)]

Acast Powers.

[Caller/Listener 2]

The World's Best Podcasts Here's a show that we recommend. We all have bad days and sometimes bad weeks and maybe even bad years. But the good news is we don't have to figure out life all alone. Chris I'm comedian Chris Duffy, host of Ted's how to Be a Better Human podcast, and our show is about the little ways that you can improve your life. Actual practical tips that you can put into place that will make your day to day better. Whether it is setting boundaries at work or rethinking how you clean your house, each episode has conversations with experts who share tips on how to navigate life's ups and downs. Find how to be a better human wherever you're listening to this. ACAST helps creators launch, grow and monetize their podcasts everywhere.

[Burt (Host)]

Acast.

[Sarah (Caller with intervention story)]

Com.