Vault: She thinks her boyfriend is cheating

Summary

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Podcast Summary: The Bert Show

Episode: Vault: She Thinks Her Boyfriend is Cheating
Date: July 29, 2026

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Overview

In this episode, the Bert Show team takes a listener call from Brittany, who is concerned that her boyfriend of two years may be cheating on her. The conversation explores Brittany's suspicions, shares advice from the hosts and listeners, and navigates the broader question of when to trust your gut in relationships. The show maintains its signature blend of humor, honesty, and real talk, encouraging listeners to consider the evidence, communicate openly, and advocate for themselves.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Brittany Shares Her Concerns (00:29–05:50)

• Brittany's Relationship Context:
  • Together for over two years.
  • No definitive history of cheating, but some past suspicions.
• Red Flags Cited:
  • Inconsistencies in his reported locations and travel times for work.
  • Periods of unreachability (2–3 hours) during workdays.
  • Photos of himself on his phone that seem like profile pictures.
  • Tendency to abruptly log off the computer or hide activity when Brittany enters the room.
  • An instance of his wallet being out of its usual place and potentially hidden.

Quote:
"I've noticed that he has on his phone recently taken some photos of… himself and it just… I mean, I don't know why. It just seems like it would be a photo for maybe a profile picture or something that you emailed or sent in a text." – Brittany (01:29)

2. Host & Listener Responses (05:51–09:42)

• Hosts’ Take:
  • Acknowledge Brittany's concerns but caution against jumping to conclusions.
  • Note it's not always suspicious to be unreachable for a few hours at work.
  • Urge Brittany to communicate directly and avoid fueling paranoia.

Quote:
"It doesn't sound… I mean, the relationship… you're paranoid, isn't it? Right now, I mean, it obviously sounds like it's everything you think about, every move he makes you think is to cover something else up." – Host 3 (05:51)

• Red Flag: Gaslighting?
  • Brittany notes that when she asks, her boyfriend accuses her of being nosy or even blames her for the situation.

Quote:
"Typically, if I ever do ask or question things, it's always either I'm just being nosy or I'm snooping or it'll be turned around that somehow, you know, like, whatever happened is my fault." – Brittany (08:12)

• Caller Sheila Confirms Suspicion:

  • Shares personal experience: Profile pictures of her ex were a cheating giveaway.
  • Recommends trusting intuition.

• Caller Nessa’s Bold Take:

  • Admits she only dates married/unavailable men for "safety."
  • Reads Brittany’s boyfriend’s behavior as “classic” cheater actions.

Quote:
"What he is doing as far as logging off every time he gets up to go to another room, taking pictures of himself. He's. Yeah, he's not being faithful. Because that's classic normal. That's what they do." – Nessa (08:32)

3. Solutions & Next Steps (09:43–11:34)

• Investigation Options:
  • Suggest using phone GPS tracking.
  • Offer hiring a private investigator ("Jason") to discreetly trail or research him.

Quote:
"If you really want to find out, we can find out for you." – Host 2 (10:31)

• Brittany’s Resolve:

  • States that if cheating is confirmed, she would end the relationship.

• Hosts Offer Caution:

  • Warn that if the boyfriend discovers he’s being investigated and is innocent, the relationship could be damaged irreparably.

Quote:
"If he ever finds out that you did this and he's not doing anything, that relationship's over." – Host 4 (11:08)

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Memorable Moments & Notable Quotes

• On paranoia and trust:
  “If you think the relationship is worth fighting for, then I would say fight for it and find out the answers that you need before just bailing on it.” – Host 1 (07:40)

• A listener’s unorthodox dating logic:
  "I only date married men… Because I know what I'm getting into. And I know that I cannot get hurt because I know the situation." – Nessa (09:16)

• On the danger of snooping:
  "If he ever found out, like, that's… that's big." – Host 4 (11:30)

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• 00:29–01:29: Brittany lays out her initial suspicions.
• 01:29–02:20: Details about suspicious photos and work routine.
• 03:31–04:15: Hosts question the significance of communication gaps and weekend behaviors.
• 05:51–06:27: Spotlight on potential paranoia and relationship strain.
• 08:12–08:27: Brittany describes being blamed when confronting her boyfriend.
• 08:32–09:42: Callers share personal experiences and perspectives on cheater behaviors.
• 09:43–11:34: Options for investigation and final cautions.

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Tone and Style

• Candid, supportive, and occasionally humorous – true to The Bert Show’s brand.
• Hosts balance empathy with realism, helping Brittany weigh her doubts against evidence and trust.
• Audience participation adds real-world validation and diverse perspectives.

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Summary

This episode explores the challenging territory of relationship trust and the anxieties that arise when subtle or ambiguous “red flags” appear. With input from both hosts and listeners, Brittany is encouraged to communicate directly, consider her own well-being, and take investigative steps if necessary—but also to be mindful of the possible consequences. The episode underscores the importance of gut feelings, balanced with open dialogue and self-respect.

Transcript

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[Host 1]

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[Host 2]

See Terms, the bird show. All right, here is a question, like, do you follow your gut or are you always questioning like, no, no, no, no, this can't be. I'm just being crazy right here. I'm just being crazy because Brittany thinks that there's some signs here that maybe her boyfriend is screwing around on her, but she's not sure if she's being nutty about it or not.

[Host 1]

Okay.

[Host 2]

Hey, Brittany.

[Host 1]

There's some telltale signs, right?

[Host 2]

I think there are some red flags all the time.

[Host 3]

Yeah.

[Host 2]

Hey, Brittany.

[Caller 1]

What's up?

[Caller 2]

Hey.

[Brittany]

How's it going?

[Host 2]

Good, how are you?

[Brittany]

Oh, I'm pretty good.

[Host 1]

How is it working in one of those hurricane simulators?

[Caller 1]

I know.

[Brittany]

I think it's where I'm at on the highway, but hopefully it'll clear up.

[Host 2]

All right, Brittany, so you've been going out with this dude for how long now?

[Brittany]

I think a little over two years.

[Host 2]

Two years. All right, so. And up to this point you think he's been faithful?

[Brittany]

I guess. I thought so, but now I'm not sure.

[Host 1]

What's making you question his faithfulness?

[Brittany]

Well, I've noticed just a lot of. I don't know, for example, like if he's traveling not. Not out of state or anything, but if he's traveling for work and he'll say he's in one place and then, you know, and then, you know, it's just long until he's in another place and it's just like it doesn't add up. Like it wouldn't be enough time to go from one place to the next. And then, you know, a lot of times he'll be. And then it's for, you know, a couple of hours. You can't reach him at all. He seems. I've noticed that he has on his phone recently taking. Taken some photos of. It's like himself and it just. I mean, I don't know why. It just seems like it would be a photo for maybe a profile picture or something that you emailed or sent in a text. Just a lot of random things like that.

[Host 2]

Did he. Does he have any history of screwing around on you before that would make you insecure now?

[Brittany]

Well, I don't really know for sure, but I think so.

[Host 1]

So, but you don't know. What does he do for a living?

[Brittany]

Well, he. He works for a company where he goes out, and he goes out to, you know, people's homes every day.

[Host 3]

Okay, so don't have an office job?

[Brittany]

No, just. He only goes to the office once in a while.

[Host 3]

Okay.

[Host 2]

And when you say, you call or you text him, how many hours are we talking about before he hits you back?

[Brittany]

Sometimes it's like, you know, I'll be in regular contact with him, and then all of a sudden, it'll be like two hours or maybe three hours before then I'm able to get in touch with him again.

[Host 2]

Is that super unusual at the time?

[Host 1]

Have you asked him about why he's out of touch? What does he say when you ask him about it? Like, hey, I was trying to call you to find out what you want for dinner, but you weren't answering your phone. What does he say?

[Brittany]

Oh, I was busy. I was working. You know, that kind of thing.

[Host 3]

I mean, I think it's almost like you're applying. I mean, you already had. Your gut is telling you something's wrong, and you're applying everything to that. Because I don't think it's abnormal for somebody to be out of touch with their partners for hours on a workday, you know, But. But you have suspicion.

[Host 4]

Did you say, at the beginning, when he travels, like he's in different places than he says he is?

[Brittany]

Well, I think so. I mean, it's just kind of like if you said, you know, that. I don't know, say you're in Atlanta, and you'll know, you know, that you'll be coming home, which is, I don't know, say, you know, Marietta or something like that. You kind of know the time. You know, I mean, including traffic, you kind of know the time that it would take to get there. But then all of a sudden, if you show up in, like, 15 minutes, there's no way you're in Atlanta. You know what I'm saying?

[Host 1]

So, okay, so he shows up faster or longer than where he says he is. Do you guys spend a lot of time together on the weekends when he's not working?

[Brittany]

Yeah, we do.

[Host 1]

Like, is there any time on the weekends where he disappears?

[Brittany]

Not usually, no.

[Host 1]

So it's just during the week while he's working, and you can't reach him a lot of.

[Brittany]

Yeah, pretty much. I know. I've noticed that. This little habit, like, for example, if he's, you know, at home using his computer, if he goes away from the computer, it's like he logs off every time. Like, if he's just, you know, stepping away, it just seems like really weird behavior.

[Host 2]

As soon as you come in the room, he closes out what he's doing

[Brittany]

and he logs off sometimes. Or if he's, like, in a, you know, just step away and go, you know, to another room or whatever. Like, he logs off my computer at home.

[Host 1]

Have you ever questioned him about it? Have you ever said, why do you do that?

[Brittany]

Yeah, he just says that I'm being nosy or something like that. So.

[Host 2]

404741. Q100. What was with the wallet? Also, you emailed us something that had to do with that.

[Brittany]

Oh, yeah, It'll be. It was one night, and I just noticed this. It wasn't, you know, in its usual, you know, place, you know, once you come home and kind of, you know, relax or whatever. And then it was. I don't know where it was. I never. I could never, you know, I was looking around the house and things like that. Maybe it was in the pants pocket or coat pocket, but I have no idea where it was. I never saw it.

[Host 2]

What does that say to you, though? It must be bugging you in some way because you emailed us about the wallet as well.

[Brittany]

So maybe it was either hidden or it was.

[Host 1]

Why would he hide his wallet? Like, what reason would he have?

[Brittany]

I mean, I don't know, unless he had something in there he wouldn't want me to see.

[Host 1]

Is this making you not want to be in a relationship with him?

[Brittany]

Yeah, kind of. Yeah.

[Host 3]

Well, it doesn't sound. I mean, the relationship. You're paranoid. Isn't it? You know, I mean, right now, I mean, it obviously sounds like it's everything you think about, every move he makes you think is to cover something else up.

[Host 2]

Have you been burned in the past by former boyfriends that cheated on you?

[Brittany]

No, not really.

[Host 4]

Okay, just this one.

[Host 2]

Sheila, good Morning. You're on Q100.

[Caller 1]

Hey, Bert. That's exactly. I just want to tell a caller that's exactly how I caught my boyfriend cheating at one point in time was the individual profile pictures of himself on his phone and then found Them on the. On website, on profiles.

[Host 2]

That's the strangest one that you mentioned to me because I can't think of any reason why I would just take a picture of just my face unless I was gonna post it on a computer somewhere.

[Host 1]

Yeah, like Twitter or something. Or if he's online dating, which is

[Host 2]

what your gut was telling you to.

[Host 4]

Which would be a profile picture. I did that with when I had her email. I looked through my phone to see. And I take a bizarre number of pictures of my dog and cat to see how many pictures I've ever.

[Host 1]

Are they online dating?

[Host 4]

My cat's got a profile. MeowMatch.com Good morning.

[Host 2]

Q100.

[Brittany]

Hello.

[Caller 1]

Good morning.

[Host 3]

Good morning.

[Host 2]

Hi.

[Caller 2]

Hi.

[Caller 1]

I think she should trust her gut.

[Host 2]

Have we talked about this before?

[Caller 1]

Ask him. And if he doesn't come clean, just trust your God.

[Host 4]

Ask him what?

[Caller 1]

Well, just whatever she feels uncomfortable about. And if he doesn't come out clean, then trust your gut. There's 50 million people in this world and she doesn't need to waste her time on one person that's gonna be unfaithful. If she feels that it's going on, then something's not right.

[Host 1]

I agree with you, but I think you gotta talk to him about it. Because part of me feels like this could be a little bit of paranoia on your part. I mean, if you guys are together every weekend when he's not working and you're spending all weekend together, there's no time during the weekend that he disappears, there's that you're spending all this time together. I mean, if he's giving you enough, like, attention and affection, all that stuff when he's not working, if it's only during these work times or when he's on his computer, I don't know. I would. I would ask. I would. If you think of the relationship is worth fighting for, then I would say fight for it and find out the answers that you need before just bailing on it.

[Brittany]

Because typically, typically, if I ever do ask or question things, it's always either I'm just being nosy or I'm snooping or it'll be turned around that somehow, you know, like, whatever happened is my fault.

[Host 3]

And that's a red flag in it.

[Brittany]

I caused it or whatever.

[Host 2]

Here is Nessa. She thinks she's got it figured out. Hey, Nessa.

[Caller 2]

Hello. I can say, yes, he is cheating. I only myself. I only date men who are either married or in relationships. And what he is doing as far as logging off every time he gets up to go to another room, taking pictures of himself. He's. Yeah, he's. He's not being faithful. Because that's classic normal. That's what they do.

[Host 2]

That. That one example to you says it all right there.

[Caller 2]

Well, I mean, they're hanging out together on the weekends, but that's, you know, that's normal, too. I mean, he has his weekdays where he's, you know, working. But, you know, she's not there. And he's home and 15. Yeah. He's cheating.

[Host 2]

And you say you only date married guys?

[Caller 2]

I only date married men. Why? It's safety for myself. Because I know what I'm getting into. And I know that I cannot get hurt because I know the situation.

[Host 2]

So it's purely, like, sexual for you?

[Caller 2]

Yeah, basically. I mean, yeah, on one hand. No, on the other, it's safety for me. It's more safety on one hand.

[Host 4]

And on the other hand, that's twisted.

[Host 2]

That's gonna take us in a different direction at another time. But I will save that call. Thank you, Nessa.

[Caller 2]

Thank you.

[Host 2]

Bye. Bye. You know. Well, here's Stephanie. She's got an idea. Hey, Stephanie. Good Morning. You're on Q100?

[Caller 1]

Yeah, I was gonna say, I don't know exactly what phone carrier she has. But cell phone people, they offer GPS tracking. So that'll be a quick way for her to find out. If he was actually telling the truth or not.

[Host 2]

Well, if you wanted to do this kind of thing. You know, we used that private investigator that Jason. When we were trying to do the. I'm just curious. The townhouse thing.

[Host 4]

Jason Derulo.

[Host 2]

And he's offered his services to us. If you wanted to track him. And you wanted these guys to sort of tail him. Find out where he's really coming from. When he says he's half an hour away, but he's really only 10 minutes away. They could do that for you.

[Host 1]

Or it would probably only take somebody to sit down and do a couple searches on your computer, right?

[Brittany]

Yes.

[Host 2]

If you really want to find out, we can find out for you.

[Brittany]

Yeah, that would be good.

[Host 1]

If you found out for sure, would you definitely leave?

[Brittany]

Oh, definitely.

[Host 2]

Oh, yeah. You want me to call him later on today?

[Host 3]

You're afraid to find out, aren't you?

[Host 2]

Yeah, because he'll find out. He's really, really good. He'll find out.

[Host 3]

Well, two years is a long time.

[Brittany]

Yeah. I mean, I guess it would be better to know, you know, if that's what's really happening.

[Host 2]

At least you can give the information. You can make a decision from there.

[Brittany]

Sure.

[Host 2]

Okay. Let me put you on hold, and I'll get in touch with those guys. Cause he's really good.

[Host 4]

Now, do we have to offer the disclaimer, you know the other side of it? That if he ever finds out that you did this and he's not doing anything, that relationship's over?

[Host 1]

Could be.

[Host 2]

Yeah. That is true. Did you hear that?

[Brittany]

Yeah. Yeah, that's true.

[Host 2]

But he doesn't have. I mean, if she hires Jason. Jason says nothing's going on. All good, then. But it's your own decision to keep that to yourself or tell him. But I think I'd see. I'd keep it to myself.

[Host 4]

I'm just saying, if he ever found out, like, that's a. That's big.

[Host 2]

He's going to be pretty upset. Hey, the bird show.