The Bert Show – Vault: She Wants To Go Out With A Married Man?!

Original Air Date: November 7, 2025
Main Host: Bert
Featured Cast: Bert, Kristin, Abby, Cassie, Tommy & the Bert Show Cast

Episode Overview

In this throwback "Vault" episode, The Bert Show crew dives into the personal and highly emotional story of "Mia," a woman torn between the past love of her life—now married—and the ethical minefield of rekindling a connection. The episode explores Mia’s heartbreak and longing, the unexpected call from her ex (now "Ryan"), and her upcoming breakfast with him, sparking debate among the hosts and introspection about love, closure, and personal boundaries.

Key Discussion Points and Insights

1. Introducing Mia’s Story

[01:39 – 02:01]

• Mia, emotionally conflicted, shares her story of past love with "Ryan," whom she dated in her early 20s.
• The relationship ended due to Ryan’s demanding career, which forced him to move frequently.

Quote:

"Oh, I'm torn. I'm so torn because this is not just some random married guy. This was the love of my life for several years and it's a very complicated situation... I'd like to give you the story so that you'll know how hard this is for me to deal with."
— Mia [01:42]

2. The Backstory: Long-Distance Love and Heartbreak

[02:01 – 06:44]

• Mia recounts dating Ryan from age 22 to 25, maintaining a deep connection through frequent moves (Nebraska, Canada, Miami, Oklahoma).
• Feeling sidelined by his career, Mia impulsively goes on a date with someone else (not meaning to move on), which shatters Ryan, leading to a dramatic breakup.
• Despite three years apart, Mia confesses she still thinks and dreams about him daily.

Notable Moment:

• Mia recalls the breakup with painful precision:

  "It was Thursday, January 16, 11:36pm 2003. He called me on the phone. He told me that he found out I had gone out with somebody else and that he never wanted to speak to me again."
  — Mia [03:26]

3. Ryan’s Return & The Married Man Dilemma

[06:44 – 07:55]

• Out of the blue, Ryan contacts Mia, revealing he’s married but wants to meet for breakfast during a business trip.
• He insists on a sober setting ("no alcohol"), stressing responsibility.

Quotes:

"He called me and left a message and said, you know, this is Ryan, I need to. I need to speak. Please call me back."
— Mia [04:59]
"He told me he thinks about me every day since we broke up and he thinks about me every night and he really needs to see me and speak to me."
— Mia [05:26]

4. Host and Cast Debate: Should Mia Go? Is This Ethical?

[07:26 – 11:22]

• The central question is not whether Mia will go—she’s made up her mind—but the morality and potential impact.
• Hosts weigh whether Ryan wants closure, to rekindle romance, or just to clarify unresolved emotions.
• Concerns are raised about the consequences for Ryan’s marriage and Mia’s emotional health.

Quotes:

"You're not asking us whether or not you should go, because you're going. I can hear it in your voice."
— Host [07:26]

"If he made a mistake in getting married because someone else is the love of his life, then he has an obligation to address that issue."
— Bert [10:46]

5. Emotional Reality Check: What is Mia Really Hoping For?

[11:22 – 13:09]

• Mia says she’s open to closure but admits she’ll always love Ryan, regardless of outcome.
• The hosts repeatedly point out that Mia, despite dating others, never emotionally moved on.

Quotes:

"I will love him forever. I mean, you know, just because our circumstances have kept us apart..."
— Mia [12:26]

"You haven't tried to date other people. You're going through the motions."
— Co-host [12:48]

6. Obsession or Just Following Up? Mia’s Ongoing Connection

[13:09 – 14:42]

• Playful but telling rapid-fire questions:
  • Mia knows Ryan’s home address, his wife’s workplace, her photo, his email, MySpace page, and checks on him daily online.
  • She admits to occasionally calling his office just to hear his voicemail.

Quotes:

"How often do you look at his MySpace page?"
— Bert [14:08]
"Every day."
— Mia [14:10]

"How often do you call his office when he's not at his desk in order to hear his…?"
— Bert [14:32]
"I haven't done that very much. Maybe once a month."
— Mia [14:37]

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Mia’s raw heartbreak:

  "Every morning when I wake up, I think about him. When I go to sleep, I dream about him."
  — Mia [04:08]

• Debate on marriage ethics:

  "Just meeting with her for breakfast is potentially going to ruin his marriage. We don't know if he has been upfront with his wife about it."
  — Co-host [08:24]

• Playful ribbing by hosts:

  "She's already there. She's already at the restaurant now. Mia, let me ask you a question."
  — Co-host [11:38]

Important Segment Timestamps

• [01:39] — Mia joins the show, shares her emotional turmoil.
• [03:26] — Mia describes the exact moment of breakup with Ryan.
• [05:26] — Mia explains Ryan’s recent call and his feelings.
• [07:39] — Mia reveals she’s getting ready for the meeting ("hair appointment Friday").
• [10:46] — Bert gives his (minority) position on why she should go.
• [12:26] — Mia confesses she’ll love Ryan forever.
• [14:08–14:37] — Mia’s admissions about tracking Ryan online and calling his office.

Overall Tone & Takeaways

The conversation is a mix of heartfelt empathy, teasing banter, and serious reflection on love, closure, and fidelity. The hosts don’t shy from challenging Mia’s motivations but also acknowledge the grip of unresolved first love. The episode is both entertaining and thought-provoking, with the promise of a Monday morning follow-up leaving listeners eager for resolution.

End of Summary