Vault: She wants to publicly apologize to the man she cheated on

Summary

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The Bert Show: Vault - She Wants to Publicly Apologize to the Man She Cheated On

Air Date: June 3, 2026
Host: Bert Show Cast (Bert, Jennifer & others)
Guest: Pauline (Listener/Caller)

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Episode Overview

In this emotionally charged episode, "Vault: She wants to publicly apologize to the man she cheated on," listener Pauline calls into The Bert Show to use the radio as a platform for a heartfelt public apology to her ex-boyfriend, Justin. After a painful breakup following a declined marriage proposal, Pauline made a mistake that led to the end of their relationship—and now hopes her public vulnerability will offer some path toward forgiveness, reconciliation, or at least closure.

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Key Discussion Points

1. Pauline’s Story and Her Motivation (01:05–04:30)

• Pauline’s Background: She and Justin dated for three years. Two months before the call, Justin proposed. Pauline, feeling unready and immature, declined, though she insisted she loved him.
• Initial Aftermath: Justin was devastated and went completely silent for two weeks (“...he just needed some time” – Pauline, 01:39).
• Her Mistake: During that separation, Pauline, in an effort to distract herself, went drinking with friends and ended up having a one-night stand with a stranger (not named).
  • “It didn’t mean anything. It was a one-night stand. I never talked to him again.” – Pauline (01:55)
• Attempted Reconciliation: Justin wanted to reconcile two weeks later. Pauline kept the hookup secret.
• Revelation and Fallout: A friend who was at the bar informed Justin. When confronted, Pauline got defensive, feeling the hookup happened during a break. After that confrontation, Justin broke things off for good.
• Pauline’s Reflection: With time, Pauline realized she was wrong both for the one-night stand and for hiding it.

Notable Quote:

“Justin, I just want you to know that I’m so sorry and that I love you so much, and that if you were to propose to me right now, I would completely accept.”
— Pauline (04:09)

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2. The Hosts and Callers React: Was It Cheating? Were They “On a Break”? (04:30–09:55)

• Debate Over the Break
  • Co-host Jennifer and Bert immediately pick up on the “break” argument, referencing the ambiguous nature of Pauline and Justin’s status.
  • “Was there an official break? Was there an official, like, ‘I don’t want to see you anymore’? Was that ever said?” – Bert (04:38)
  • Pauline details Justin’s cold behavior and silence after the proposal was declined, expressing her confusion and feelings of guilt.
• Listener Call-Ins
  • Multiple callers (Charles, Mike, Ray, Jennifer, Tom) strongly disagreed with Pauline’s view that their breakup excused her actions:
    • “If he didn’t say, okay, I never want to talk to you again, then I don’t think you’re broken up.” – Charles (06:54)
    • “Just cause you’re on a break don’t give you carte blanche to go out and do whatever you want.” – Mike (07:20)
    • “It takes you only two weeks to hook up with another dude? That makes no sense to me.” – Ray (08:35)
  • The hosts acknowledge that opinions might flip if gender roles were reversed, reflecting on societal expectations and double standards.
    • “If it was a guy calling up to apologize…and they were on a break, you would be so on his side.” – Jennifer (13:23)
• Pauline’s Response
  • Pauline admits she acted thoughtlessly and emotionally: “I just did dumb stuff. That’s what happens when you just don’t think…” (08:55)
  • She emphasizes her realization and regret, not shying from listener criticism.

Notable Quote:

“Once you’re a cheater, you’re always going to be a cheater. That trust will never be...built up again.”
— Tom, Caller (11:35)

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3. Pauline’s Final Plea & Reflections on Forgiveness (09:55–13:14)

• Learning from Mistakes
  • Pauline pushes back on the notion that “once a cheater, always a cheater,” emphasizing personal growth:
    • “I don’t agree at all with ‘once a cheater, always a cheater.’ …When you make a mistake, you learn from it. And I’m big on that, and Justin, you know that I’m big on that.” (12:21)
  • She reiterates her love for Justin and explains her avoidance of socializing since their split – showing she’s remorseful and focused on self-improvement.
• Hosts’ Support
  • The Bert Show team encourages Pauline, noting this public, and sometimes brutal, forum might actually help her if Justin is listening.
  • Bert comments: “If Justin is listening right now and he’s hearing you get beat up, I think you’ll get more of a sympathetic card…” (09:55)
• Invitation for Follow-up
  • Bert and Jennifer ask Pauline to update them if Justin reaches out: “Let us know if he does reach back out to you.” – Jennifer (13:10)

Notable Quote:

“Once I do [commit], I’m committed for life. And I just want you to know that. And if you get this, please give me a call. Please give me a call.”
— Pauline (12:53)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On her realization:
  “I just want him to hear me as I am now. I'm calm. I've thought this through so much over and over in my head... I can see clearly and I know that he's the one for me.”
  — Pauline (05:35)

• Listener perspective on breakups:
  “If you really love somebody, you would never even consider thinking, even cheating on somebody.”
  — Tom, Caller (11:35)

• Hosts reflect on double standards:
  “If it was a guy calling up to apologize…you would be so on his side.”
  — Jennifer (13:23)

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• Pauline shares her story and apology: 01:05–04:30
• Host and co-host challenge the “break” logic: 04:32–05:12
• First wave of critical caller reactions: 06:32–09:55
• Pauline reflects and responds: 08:55–09:28
• Final listener calls and Pauline’s earnest last plea: 09:33–13:14

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Episode Flow & Takeaways

• The episode dives deep into the nuances of relationship breaks and infidelity, with Pauline’s openness setting the tone for a raw discussion about trust, mistakes, and forgiveness.
• The show’s phone lines fill with mostly critical responses, spotlighting common attitudes toward cheating and emotional mistakes in relationships.
• The hosts deftly balance empathy for Pauline with honest assessment—using humor and authenticity to highlight gender double-standards and the complicated nature of forgiveness.
• The lasting message: While some listeners see betrayal as unforgivable, others—Pauline included—hold out hope for growth, second chances, and understanding.

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For anyone navigating heartbreak, mistakes, or second chances, this episode is a powerful, honest listen.

Transcript

[Caller/Listener]

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[Pauline]

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[Commercial Announcer]

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[Host (Burt)]

Here's Pauline. Hey, Pauline.

[Pauline]

Hi, guys.

[Host (Burt)]

How are you this morning?

[Pauline]

I'm okay. How are you?

[Host (Burt)]

Oh, you screwed up, didn't you?

[Pauline]

Yeah, I did.

[Host (Burt)]

We will do this from time to time, or at least we have made the offer. I think you're the first that has actually taken us up on it to go ahead and just use our show for whatever. I mean, we don't really like to put parameters on it because it could be anything that you want. If you're out of work, you want to tell Atlanta what you're qualified to do, you could use our show for that. If you wanted to use our show to get advice for a boyfriend's pres, it could be anything. Anything. Pauline's got something serious though, because she screwed up a relationship.

[Pauline]

Yeah, I just wanted to use your guys show to publicly apologize to my now ex boyfriend. We were dating for like three years and his name is Justin. So Justin, if you're out there listening, we were dating for three years and two months ago he proposed to me and you know, I knew I loved him and I told him that, but I just, I knew that I just wasn't ready. I was still at this kind of immature phase in my life and I just. I don't know, I. It's a scary thing, you know, to commit to someone for life and. And so I told him no, but that I did love him and I wasn't ready and he was devastated and for two weeks he just didn't talk to me. And he had told me before, you know, we left that night that, you know, he just needed some time. And so, so, you know, and I knew that I had damaged the relationship. I didn't know to what extent, but you know, he didn't talk to me for two weeks. So during that two weeks I would, you know, hang out with my girlfriend, try to get my mind off of it. And one night we went to a bar and we were drinking and I ended up hooking up with this random guy. And you know, it didn't mean anything. It was a one night stand. I never talked to him again. Two weeks later, my Justin, he wants to work it out now he comes back in the picture and of course that's what I've wanted all along. So I don't tell him about the guy because, you know, it was a one night stand. I just forgotten about it, meant nothing. And you know, we're trying to work it out. A few weeks later, one of my girlfriends that was at the bar with me that one night tells him about the guy, the random guy that I hooked up with. And

[Host (Burt)]

yeah, she should be on apologizing to you, but go ahead.

[Pauline]

I know I haven't talked to her since then either, I bet, anyway. But so when Justin approached me about it, I got defensive, you know, and at that time I believed, you know, well, for those two weeks we kind of weren't together, he wasn't talking to me at all. I thought I completely ruined everything. I'd been drinking, you know, all this stuff. And at that time I completely believed what I just said. But you know, now it's been a month and a half since we've talked because, you know, after that argument he just stopped talking to me, period. And it's been a month and a half and I just realized that I'm completely wrong. I should have told him, I. I honestly should have just accepted the proposal two months ago to start with. But you know, and so I know that he listened to the show. I've tried calling him, I've tried emailing him, nothing. Even his Facebook has like no updates, you know, in the past like month. So I don't know if he's getting any of my messages on there. But I do know that he listens to your guys show at this time. So I figured this is probably my best shot for him to hear me.

[Caller/Listener]

So.

[Pauline]

Justin, I just want you to know that I'm so sorry and that I love you so much and that if you were to pose me right now, I would completely accept. Like, I've just realized that you're the only person I want. After everything that's happened, you're the only one that I want. And I hope, I pray, that you're listening to the show right now. I mean, I guess that's it. I was wrong.

[Co-host (Jennifer)]

Well, you were on a break.

[Pauline]

It was two weeks.

[Host (Burt)]

Well, yeah, I mean, I'm with you guys, but that's not the way he sees it.

[Co-host (Jennifer)]

It's not the way he sees it.

[Host (Burt)]

Was there an official break? Was there an official, like, I don't want to see you anymore? Was that ever said? Or was it. He was so hurt that he couldn't even talk to you.

[Pauline]

He was so. Like, literally, the car we had. Obviously we were. He had done it downtown. And so we were on our way home in the car, and he just was silent the entire way home. Dropped me off at my house, said nothing. I tried to kiss him goodbye. Nothing, like, kind of. He let me kiss his cheek, and it was really. It was the coldest I've ever seen him. No words. So, I mean, how else could you read that, you know? I mean, I figured I totally screwed up.

[Host (Burt)]

At least in his mind you did. So, yeah, definitely. This time it's just for you to apologize to him. I think you've done that.

[Co-host (Jennifer)]

Do you think. I don't know. What do you think it would be in this message that he would hear differently than what you have already sent him or already left on his voicemail or that kind of thing? Because he's checked his voicemail. I mean, he's gotten your messages. He's just not responding.

[Pauline]

The one thing is, a lot of the. Especially the voicemails that he can hear. I have been very emotional about it because, you know, there's nothing worse than being lonely when you know, there's someone out there that you love so much. You know what I mean? And so I've. They've been a lot of emotional messages or things that, you know, honestly might not make sense anymore. But I just want him to hear me as I am now. I'm calm. I've thought this through so much over and over in my head, you know what I mean? A million times for the past month and a half. And I just want him to know that I'm grounded now and that I. I completely. I can see clearly and I know that he's the one for me. And I want him to know that.

[Host (Burt)]

All right, so his name is Justin. And, you know, he listens at this time. So, Justin, Pauline is apologizing. If you want to call in, great. If not, at least you can talk to her after the show. It may help your cause if people call up to beat you up, which is happening, so. Hey, Charles, good Morning. You're on Q100.

[Caller/Listener]

Hey, Bert, how's it going?

[Host (Burt)]

Okay, man.

[Caller/Listener]

Yeah, I think she's completely wrong. I mean, you know, even she stated much, you know how emotional it is for him to propose, so. You know, when she broke his heart and then to go behind him and cheat, that's just like a dagger in the back, man. That. That's just wrong.

[Co-host (Jennifer)]

They were broken up.

[Caller/Listener]

You can't say that because he was so devastated. I mean, he needed time, you know, that's. If he didn't say, okay, I never want to talk to you again, then I don't think you're broken up.

[Pauline]

Well, two. Two weeks without hearing from somebody is kind of a long time. Especially if you've been together for years.

[Host (Burt)]

All these guys are calling up and saying that she's totally in the wrong. Hey, Mike. Good morning. You're on Q100.

[Caller/Listener]

Hey guys. How y' all doing?

[Host (Burt)]

Okay. How are you?

[Caller/Listener]

Good. Listen, I don't have so much as a comment for her as I do Wendy and Jen. I am so disappointed in you guys to defend her. You're on a break, blah, blah, blah. I mean, just cause you're on a break, don't give you carte blanche to go out and do whatever you want to do. If you really care about the person that just freaking proposed to you, you don't go out and do that.

[Pauline]

I mean, not.

[Caller/Listener]

Not in two weeks. I mean, come on, Seriously.

[Host (Burt)]

It's a drunken one for you guys,

[Caller/Listener]

especially Jen, to be the hopeless romantic to say, oh, she was on a break. I mean, that's bs.

[Host (Burt)]

I'm disappointed in you too, Jim. Unbelievable. Unbelievable.

[Co-host (Jennifer)]

I feel like I'm in some alternate universe right now. Wouldn't guys be typically taking my side? And he was talking like a girl just then.

[Host (Burt)]

Yeah, but it happened to the guy. So this is. Oh, so it's the fraternity right here.

[Co-host (Jennifer)]

It's the role reversal because it's the girl. But if it were a guy that we were talking to who was apologizing to his girl, it would be flip flopped.

[Host (Burt)]

Then guys would say, what are you doing? You guys pray?

[Caller/Listener]

And then girls would.

[Co-host (Jennifer)]

Exactly. And then I would be mad at that point. That's what it is. We're just taking up for our own team here.

[Caller/Listener]

I think Is what it is.

[Host (Burt)]

Hey, Ray. Good Morning. You're on Q100.

[Caller/Listener]

Hey, how y' all doing?

[Host (Burt)]

All right. How are you?

[Caller/Listener]

I want to make a comment on this girl. I don't understand how you've been with somebody for three years. It takes you only two weeks. Took up with another dude. That makes no sense to me. I don't. I mean, you tell. You tell everybody you love them, but it only takes you two weeks just because you were drunk.

[Host (Burt)]

Well, at least you're getting a good snapshot here, Pauline. Of probably the same thoughts he's having.

[Pauline]

Yeah, I mean, this is kind of helping. It's all the things that eventually entered my mind, you know, after I had time to really sit down and think. But, you know, without thinking, I just did dumb stuff. That's what happens when you just don't think and you're emotional and everything's kind of raw and you, you know, I don't know.

[Host (Burt)]

And that last dude probably said the exact same thing. He's thinking, too. You're supposed to love me. And in two weeks, you can just rebo. And get as intimate as you can with somebody, another guy. So he's probably feeling like the relationship meant nothing.

[Co-host (Jennifer)]

Just don't have another rebound in the meantime.

[Host (Burt)]

You haven't had a second one, have you?

[Pauline]

No, I'd hold off on that.

[Co-host (Jennifer)]

I'd hold off on that till he really makes a decision.

[Host (Burt)]

Hey, Jennifer, good Morning. You're on Q100.

[Pauline]

Hey. Why does she feel she deserves a second chance when she's done this on a guy that proposed to her? I mean, if you love him, you should have said yes the first time.

[Host (Burt)]

Well, she slept with another guy. She realizes that other guys just aren't as good in bed.

[Pauline]

Yeah, well, you know, I mean, he deserves way better if she truly loved him. It shouldn't take sleeping with a guy for her to realize, oh, I want him now.

[Host (Burt)]

Pauline, I think these calls are actually going to help you in the long run, because if Justin is listening right now and he's hearing you get beat up, I think you'll. You'll get more of a sympathetic card than if we were putting people on that were supporting you. So I think it's a good thing.

[Co-host (Jennifer)]

And the other thing is, if you could start crying right now, that'd be good.

[Pauline]

Don't do that.

[Caller/Listener]

Good morning.

[Host (Burt)]

One more call.

[Co-host (Jennifer)]

She might need to.

[Caller/Listener]

Okay.

[Host (Burt)]

Hey, Tom. Go ahead. You're on Q100.

[Caller/Listener]

Hey, good morning, guys. How are you doing?

[Host (Burt)]

Okay. Doing.

[Caller/Listener]

I love, love, love the show, but back to the subject I totally agree with everyone else is saying it happened to me three years ago. I was gone away for three weeks. I tripped and found out by email that my Recent girlfriend of 4 years been cheating on me. So it doesn't matter how you apologize or what you do, if you really loved him, you can endure anything and everything throughout the relationship. So I don't see how he can forgive you or if he even considered thinking about forgiving you. Because it's been almost three years now and I haven't talked to her yet.

[Host (Burt)]

Oh, dude.

[Caller/Listener]

Yeah, it's. It's something that hurts. But I agree with him, what he's doing right now. You, you, you gotta move on. He's gonna find something, somebody better, and you're gonna take this lesson, hopefully, and in your next relationship, you're not gonna make the same mistake.

[Host (Burt)]

So we don't know that. You don't. And isn't there like an implied contradiction in what you said? Because you just said if there are two people that are really in love, then that love will overcome everything. Well, if that's the case, and then, and Justin really loves Pauline here, then won't this relationship overcome this?

[Caller/Listener]

That's true, but the minute you, the minute you cheat on somebody, there's never been a love involved. If you really love somebody, you would never even consider thinking, even cheating on somebody. So, you know, love will always be there. But at the same time, just thinking back, once you're a cheater, you're always going to be a cheater. That trust will never be, be able to be built up again.

[Host (Burt)]

Yeah. You still hurt? I can hear you still hurt, man.

[Caller/Listener]

Yeah, that's true. But at the same time, you got to realize that when you move on, you're gonna find somebody a lot better.

[Host (Burt)]

All right, thank you for calling.

[Caller/Listener]

All right.

[Host (Burt)]

All right, Pauline, it's out there. I don't know that he'll call us, but if you hear from him, will you give us a follow up?

[Pauline]

Oh, yeah, definitely.

[Host (Burt)]

Okay. Any last words you want to say to him if he is listening right now?

[Pauline]

Justin, I just want you to know again that I've completely realized my mistakes and I don't. First off, I don't agree at all with once a cheater, always a cheater. Because you also can say that when you make a mistake, you learn from it. And I'm big on that. And Justin, you know that I'm big on that. And I just want you to know that I realize I've made the mistake and I haven't like I haven't done anything for a month and a half other than work. I come straight home because I don't want to hang out with anyone else. I don't want to. And I hope that you realize that I do love you, truly, and that I just wasn't ready. And you know how I can be when it comes to making commitments with anything, even with jobs. You know how I am. But once I do it, I'm committed for life. And I just want you to know that. And if you get this, please give me a call. Please give me a call.

[Host (Burt)]

Okay. We will let you know if he contacts us, but again, I think he's gonna. He'll email you before he emails us, I hope.

[Co-host (Jennifer)]

Well, let us know if he does reach back out to you.

[Pauline]

I will. Thank you guys so much.

[Host (Burt)]

Good luck and bye bye. I'm with them. I'm so disappointed in y'.

[Caller/Listener]

All.

[Co-host (Jennifer)]

Oh, whatever. You would be on the other side if it was the other way around.

[Host (Burt)]

Sometimes I can't even look at y'.

[Pauline]

All.

[Co-host (Jennifer)]

If it was a guy calling up to apologize to a girl and they were on a break, you would be so on his side.

[Pauline]

He was just on board in the

[Commercial Announcer]

beginning of the call.

[Co-host (Jennifer)]

She can't hear that in her voice. She sincerely loves him.

[Host (Burt)]

Well, that she shouldn't have slept with another guy.

[Co-host (Jennifer)]

Yes, but she's apologizing for that.

[Host (Burt)]

Well, some mistakes are just too big

[Co-host (Jennifer)]

and they were on a break.

[Host (Burt)]

Listen, it's the vert show.

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