Vault: She's ready to say sorry after 27 years

Summary

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The Bert Show – Vault: She's Ready to Say Sorry after 27 Years

Original Airdate: June 15, 2026
Hosts: The Bert Show Cast (Bert, Kristin, Abby, Cassie, Tommy, and more)
Episode Theme:
A candid segment exploring “coward’s apologies” — moments when people try to say sorry for past wrongs but can’t do it directly, and instead turn to the show to help bridge the gap.

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Overview

This episode of The Bert Show centers on listeners who have been carrying guilt over things they've done — sometimes decades ago — but have struggled to apologize directly to those they wronged. The show acts as a medium for these confessions, hoping to connect (or at least relay the message) to the affected parties, sparking reflection and closure. Lively, empathetic, and sometimes sharply funny, the cast creates a safe, judgment-light environment for these "coward’s apologies."

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

What’s a “Coward’s Apology?” (01:30–02:13)

• Definition:
  The cast introduces the concept: apologizing not directly to the wronged person, but via the show as a sort of halfway measure.
  • “Am I explaining this right? Because it really is the way to apologize without apologizing. Well, I think it’s still got credit for it.” — Host (01:30)
• Hope for Closure:
  The hosts encourage listeners who can’t bring themselves to apologize face-to-face to share their story, with the hope it might reach or reconnect them with the other person.

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Listener #1: Valerie’s 27-Year-Old Regret (02:14–05:30)

• Story:
  Valerie calls in to apologize to “Manuel Baca” in Los Alamos, NM. In high school, she and two friends kicked him out of a Journey cover act minutes before a talent show and took his part. Only later, reconnecting via Facebook, did she realize how much singing Journey meant to him.
• Regret & Growth:
  Valerie shares, with clear emotion, how badly she feels and how the act has haunted her through adulthood.
  • “It was horribly selfish. I mean, much older now, looking back... I have been thinking about this every single day since we connected on Facebook like, a year and a half ago.” — Valerie (03:24)
  • She admits embarrassment has kept her from apologizing directly.
  • “I just haven’t done it. I think about it, but it’s like, I get on, and it’s so embarrassing.” — Valerie (03:44)
• Host Reactions:
  The hosts express compassion, brainstorm about reaching out to Manuel, and suggest sending an MP3 of the segment to him.
• Memorable Moment:
  When Valerie reveals they sang “Don’t Stop Believin’,” a host jokes about the irony:
  • “He just ripped his heart out, made him stop.” — Co-Host (05:10)
• Resolution:
  The show promises to try connecting with Manuel or at least pass on the apology.

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Listener #2: Michelle’s Anonymous Heartbreak (05:42–08:25)

• Story:
  Michelle, voice disguised, recounts breaking off contact with a man she’d dated during a brief breakup from her long-term boyfriend. She ended things abruptly after a party, ignoring his repeated messages. Now, with her boyfriend again, she feels guilty.
• Complications:
  Michelle fears her boyfriend discovering this chapter, so she asks not to use full names and only apologizes publicly in this roundabout way.
• Hosts' Involvement:
  The cast debates the best way to reach “Michael” while respecting Michelle’s need for discretion, suggesting a behind-the-scenes approach:
  • “We got to put you on hold. You got to come clean with Joanna and tell her your boyfriend’s first and last [name of the guy you were dating]. Then we need to call him.” — Producer/Assistant (07:49)
• Memorable Quote:
  • “I am very upset. It is not in my character to do this to someone. And his name is Michael, and I would just like to apologize for that. For breaking his heart and not being able to apologize in person like I should have.” — Michelle (07:01)
• Outcome:
  They agree to try to deliver the apology privately and report back on the reaction.

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Listener #3: Carrie’s Family Secret (08:26–13:01)

• Story:
  Carrie calls to confess — and apologize for — sabotaging her mother’s relationship. After a painful divorce, Carrie’s mom began seeing someone of another race. Carrie, upset, took him aside and told him the relationship wasn’t going to work. The man subsequently ended things with her mother, who has been unhappy and single since.
• Guilt & Self-Reflection:
  Carrie admits her motivations were rooted in ignorance and emotional turmoil:
  • “At the time, I guess I was just really ignorant and sort of just upset and really, really hurt about the divorce. And so... looking for some reason to really, like, kind of focus in on and dislike him. Now I really see that I was so wrong and that I should... be supportive.” — Carrie (10:23)
• Desire for Change:
  She wants her mom to find happiness, with anyone.
  • “I want her to know that her being happy with anybody would make me happy.” — Carrie (11:12)
• Hosts’ Suggestions:
  The team offers to try to communicate apologies both to her mom and her mom’s ex, first off-air and then possibly sharing reactions later.
  • “Do we go with first names here? Because, I mean, eventually this has got to get back. What we’re hoping here is it gets back to your mom and her ex.” — Host (12:07)
• Memorable Exchange:
  • “Cuz that’s ah, sabotaging mom.” — Co-Host (13:23)
• Takeaway:
  Carrie is recognized as coming clean and taking responsibility, even if indirectly.

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Reflections: The Value of Apologizing, Even Indirectly (13:10–13:33)

• Host Perspective:
  The team closes the content with a reflection on the merit of even an indirect apology:
  • “I think coming clean is better than not... It’s better than holding that secret.” — Host & Co-Host (13:18–13:23)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “Am I explaining this right? Because it really is the way to apologize without apologizing.” — Host (01:30)
• “It was horribly selfish. I mean, much older now, looking back... I have been thinking about this every single day since we connected on Facebook like, a year and a half ago.” — Valerie (03:24)
• “He just ripped his heart out, made him stop.” — Co-Host (05:10)
• “I am very upset. It is not in my character to do this to someone... For breaking his heart and not being able to apologize in person like I should have.” — Michelle (07:01)
• "I want her to know that her being happy with anybody would make me happy.” — Carrie (11:12)
• “That’s why we call it the coward’s apology. It’s not actually to the person, it’s to us.” — Host (12:55)

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Segment Timestamps

• [01:30] Introduction to the “coward’s apology” theme
• [02:14] Valerie’s 27-year-old apology story (Journey talent show sabotage)
• [05:42] Michelle’s anonymous heartbreak apology
• [08:26] Carrie apologizes for sabotaging her mother’s relationship
• [13:10] Host discussion: the value of indirect apologies

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Summary Takeaways

This episode is a compassionate, often humorous, sometimes raw look at how regret can linger for years—and how sharing it, even in a “coward’s” way, can lift a burden. The hosts create a judgment-light safe space for confession and support, sometimes nudging toward accountability, but always recognizing the difficulty and vulnerability of public apology. If you missed it, you’ll walk away reflecting on your own unfinished business—and maybe even be inspired to reach out to someone yourself.

Transcript

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[Host]

The Bird Show Am I explaining this right? Because it really is the way to apologize without apologizing. Well, I think it's still got credit for it.

[Co-Host]

We talk about cowards apology. Yeah, I think it's people who have been cowardly about apologizing for something they should have done face to face. So you know, why not let us help you do it? So just call us and we'll help you make that apology to somebody.

[Host]

And our bet is if you tell us about it, there's going to be somebody listening that knows the person that you're talking about. And, and what we're hoping is you call them up and you go, hey, I don't know if you're listening to the birth show this morning, but Valerie was on. Did you guys have some weirdness back in the day? Cause she apologized on the radio this morning, and they'll say, yeah, that did happen. And then we get the two of you guys back together, everything's fine, right? You apologize without really ever apologizing.

[Co-Host]

I like it.

[Host]

Hey, Valerie.

[Valerie]

Hey, guys. Congratulations, Jeff.

[Host]

He just walked out of the studio.

[Co-Host]

Yeah, he's already being a diva about it.

[Host]

So what's up, Valerie? Who do you not need to apologize to that you're apologizing?

[Valerie]

Well, his name is Manuel Baca. He lives in Los Alamos, New Mexico. And when we were in high school, we were all in a talent show, and he was singing a Journey song with two girls, and at the last minute, we conspired and kicked him out of the song. The day of the talent show, like, 15 minutes before they were supposed to go on, and I took his place. And I didn't realize later that we connected on Facebook that he is just. Just this huge Journey fan, wants to sing lead singer with Journey, and how much it had an impact on him. So I just wanted to apologize to him 27 years later.

[Co-Host 2]

Do you know why?

[Co-Host]

I mean, I'm just curious. What was the reason to kick him out?

[Valerie]

There was no reason. Just we thought we would do better, the three of us.

[Co-Host]

You're just closer as three girls.

[Host]

I mean, it was a totally selfish move on your part.

[Valerie]

It was horribly selfish. I mean, much older now, looking back, it's ironic that you're doing this, because I have been thinking about this every single day since we connected on Facebook like, a year and a half ago.

[Host]

So why haven't you? I mean, because it's a pretty safe forum. Facebook. Why haven't you just Facebooked him and said, hey, I just want to say I'm sorry.

[Valerie]

I'm just so embarrassed. It was just such a stupid thing to do, and I guess I'm just really embarrassed, and I just haven't done it. I think about it, but it's like, I get on, and it's just, you know, it's so embarrassing.

[Host]

You know what we may have to do with this one, because it is New Mexico, and if we don't hear back from him, is we may just send, like, this segment and an MP3 anonymously to him.

[Valerie]

Oh, that would be great.

[Co-Host 2]

Are you upset?

[Valerie]

I am. I feel really bad about it. You know, when you grow up and you become mature and a much more sensitive person and understanding of people, people's emotional needs, I mean, in high School. It was just incredibly selfish and self centered. And I'm a totally different person now. So it just kind of has this huge impact on me, like, daily that I actually did that to somebody.

[Co-Host]

Well, now that you watch Glee, I

[Valerie]

didn't realize at the moment how important that moment was to him.

[Host]

I wonder if we ever did get in touch with this guy 26 years later, if he even thinks twice about it now. Like, this may be such a big issue because it went so against your character as an adult that he may not even be thinking about it.

[Valerie]

I wonder because he made comments on Facebook. I think he just may remember.

[Host]

Really?

[Valerie]

Yeah, I do.

[Host]

Okay.

[Valerie]

I do.

[Co-Host]

What was the song? Do you remember?

[Valerie]

I think it was don't stop believing.

[Co-Host]

Wow, that's great. He just ripped his heart out, made him stop.

[Co-Host 2]

She was badly enough to Valerie.

[Valerie]

I feel so much better now.

[Host]

Valerie, let me. If we hear from him, we'll somehow reunite you guys or we will get this into his hands so he knows how apologetic you are.

[Valerie]

Sounds good. I love you guys.

[Host]

Thank you. Hold on.

[Valerie]

Take care.

[Host]

All right, so that's really apologizing without apologizing right to him. She even said, look, I've been on Facebook and I'd like to do it, but I just haven't been able to. She just did it. So she gets credit if we send this to him.

[Co-Host]

Yes.

[Host]

Hey, Michelle, you're on the voice disguiser.

[Michelle]

Hi, guys. Just want to say I love the show.

[Co-Host]

Thank you.

[Host]

Thank you.

[Michelle]

You're welcome. I would like to first of all say that you guys are going to be the first people that I've ever told this to.

[Host]

Now you have our attention.

[Michelle]

I'm just getting it off my chest as well as apologizing.

[Carrie]

Okay.

[Michelle]

I was dating someone, and I had been dating them for about five years, and I started going to school and I met this guy at my school and we started out studying together and just hanging out a little bit. And my boyfriend and I separated for a minute for about three months, I would say, and me and this guy hung out. But I never let him know very much about me. Like, I never let him know where I lived or pretty much nothing. Just like my phone number and we would talk on Facebook. And eventually we all went to this party one night and I took him to this party and he was super jealous of everyone that I was around. Girls and guys. And when we got back home, I just completely stopped talking to him. And he wrote me several, several messages. And it just broke his heart in half. And I am back Together with my boyfriend now, and everything is good, but I am very upset. It is not in my character to do this to someone. And his name is Michael, and I would just like to apologize for that. For breaking his heart and not being able to apologize in person like I should have.

[Host]

And he lives here in Atlanta.

[Michelle]

He does.

[Host]

Well, I think we need a first and a last name just so we for sure can, you know, so somebody will look him up.

[Co-Host 2]

She's on the voice disguiser, but the

[Host]

only way to get the apology to him is if people know who he is.

[Producer/Assistant]

Yeah, but she's using a fake name, and.

[Michelle]

Right. I'm just afraid if I use the entire name. Like, if this was to come about. I'm back with my boyfriend now, and if he was to ever find out about this, then it would probably ruin everything for me.

[Valerie]

So.

[Producer/Assistant]

So, you know what?

[Co-Host 2]

Let me just clarify real quick. Your boyfriend doesn't know that you dated somebody else while you guys were on a break?

[Michelle]

He does not.

[Producer/Assistant]

Okay.

[Michelle]

And that I would like to apologize for, too.

[Producer/Assistant]

So here's.

[Michelle]

No, he does not.

[Producer/Assistant]

All right, here's what we need to do then.

[Carrie]

Okay?

[Producer/Assistant]

We got to put you on hold.

[Carrie]

Okay?

[Producer/Assistant]

You got to come clean with Joanna and tell her your boyfriend's first and last or the guy that you were dating's first and last name. Then we need to call him.

[Carrie]

Okay?

[Producer/Assistant]

We'll never put it. We'll put him on the voice disguiser, we'll give him a fake name going forward, and then we will pass along the apology.

[Michelle]

Okay?

[Host]

And we'll see how he reacts to it.

[Michelle]

Okay, thank you, guys.

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[Michelle]

Right?

[Host]

Does he know your boyfriend?

[Michelle]

No.

[Host]

Okay.

[Michelle]

Okay, that'll work.

[Co-Host]

All right.

[Host]

All right, Michelle, don't go anywhere. I'll put you on hold, okay?

[Carrie]

Okay.

[Host]

Okay. We can make that one work. And, Carrie, Good morning. You are on Q100. Hi.

[Carrie]

Hi. How you guys doing?

[Host]

Good. How are you?

[Carrie]

I'm okay.

[Host]

Okay.

[Co-Host]

What'd you do?

[Carrie]

Well, I'm calling to apologize to my mother, and I really hope she's listening. I feel bad she doesn't know, but I guess I'll just go right into it. About six years ago, she and my dad divorced, and I was really upset about it. And, you know, I didn't blame. I kind of blamed both of them, you know? But two years ago, my mom started dating somebody, and, like, that kind of really drove me crazy. I'll admit that he was of a different race, and that didn't you know, real me. But at one point, it kind of got like. I kind of escalated and I pulled him aside one night and I said, you know, this is not going to work out between you guys. I don't feel comfortable about this. I kind of just went off and he broke up with my mother. And my mother hasn't dated anybody since. Not happy. She is not happy.

[Co-Host]

And she didn't know that you pulled him aside?

[Carrie]

No, she doesn't know. And I feel awful.

[Host]

So he made up some excuse to her on why it wasn't going to work out. But the truth was he just didn't want to have to deal with you.

[Carrie]

I mean, I don't know what he said to her, but I know that she was. She was devastated. Wow.

[Host]

And how long ago was this?

[Carrie]

This was about two years ago. Ooh, that's a lot of evil.

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[Producer/Assistant]

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[Co-Host 2]

Who else?

[Valerie]

Melissa.

[Co-Host]

Hi, babe.

[Host]

Oh, that sucks. So. And you've never come clean to your mom about it?

[Carrie]

No, I just feel so awful, and I couldn't say it to her face. You know, I had to call because it's just. I mean, I hadn't said it to anybody and it just made me feel awful. I mean, the whole, you know, like, he's a different race. And at the time, I guess I was just really ignorant and sort of just upset and really, really hurt about the divorce. And so, like, I was looking for some reason to really, like, kind of focus in on not and dislike him. And now I really see that I was so wrong and that I should. My mother's happiness is number one. And I should be supportive of anybody she dates, you know?

[Host]

So is your hope that somehow she hears the apology and then would reconnect with him?

[Valerie]

I hope she hears my apology.

[Carrie]

I mean, if they were to reconnect and it were to work out again, I mean, that's great. I just want her to meet somebody. I want her to be happy. And I want her to know that her being happy with anybody would make me happy.

[Co-Host 2]

Shouldn't you call him and apologize?

[Producer/Assistant]

He just years ago, he could have moved on.

[Co-Host]

Do we say I don't.

[Valerie]

I'm sorry.

[Carrie]

I could call him and I mean, obviously I'm terrified.

[Host]

So who are you really apologizing to here? Are you apologizing to him? Are you apologizing to your mom?

[Carrie]

I guess I'm apologizing to both of them. I mean, I feel terrible that I did it and I feel terrible that my mom is unhappy, but I Also feel bad that I kind of, you know, told this guy that he couldn't do something. That obviously it was making both of them happy. It was none of my business.

[Host]

So what do we do in a situation like this? Do we go with first names here? Because, I mean, eventually this has got to get back. What we're hoping here is it gets back to your mom and her ex.

[Co-Host]

Yeah, it's a little generic right now.

[Producer/Assistant]

We could do the same thing we're doing with the other one.

[Carrie]

Yeah, I mean, I guess call the mom first names, I don't know.

[Host]

And try to figure out how to get in touch with the exact. And apologize to both of them off the air and then play back their reaction for you or at least tell you how it went.

[Co-Host 2]

Mm, yes, that's gonna be uncomfortable. Don't you think though? As soon as we talk to the mom or the ex, their next phone call is gonna be directly to her. Yes, and not through the radio station,

[Host]

but at least it'll give her some kind of buffer.

[Co-Host 2]

Yeah, still gonna be awkward and uncomfortable regardless.

[Co-Host]

But she's coming clean, you know, she's taking responsibility.

[Host]

That's why we call it the coward's apology. It's not actually to the person, it's to us. All right, Carrie, let me put you on hold.

[Carrie]

Okay, thank you.

[Host]

All right, hold on. Okay, so if those people don't hear directly, then we'll take matters into our own hands and we'll apologize for them.

[Bluff (Advertiser)]

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[Host]

And see what the reaction is.

[Co-Host 2]

Okay.

[Host]

Do you get any kind of credit though? I mean, at least it opens the doors.

[Co-Host]

I think coming clean is better than not. Yeah.

[Host]

Even if it's not to the person directly.

[Co-Host]

Yeah, I think it's. I mean, it's something. It's something. It's better than holding that secret. Cuz that's ah, sabotaging mom.

[Host]

And she still hasn't found a guy since two years.

[Co-Host 2]

That one.

[Host]

Will the bird show?

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