Vault: Should Parents Buy Their Kids Condoms? Experts and Parents Weigh In

Summary

The Bert Show – Vault Episode: Should Parents Buy Their Kids Condoms?

Airdate: April 8, 2026
Theme: A candid, spirited debate about whether parents should buy condoms for their children, featuring personal stories, cultural observations, and expert/parental input.

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Episode Overview

This episode centers on the controversial question: Should parents buy condoms for their sexually active (or soon-to-be active) teens? The Bert Show cast, led by Bert, recount a heated dinner-table discussion, examine personal philosophies, parental responsibilities, and societal expectations. The discussion spans gender perspectives, the implications of providing condoms or birth control, and calls from listeners sharing their own experiences.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

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1. The Dinner Table Debate

• [02:02–04:44] Bert shares a recent experience where he, alone among five women at a dinner party, advocated for parents providing condoms to their kids.
  • Bert’s Position: Parents should be proactive and honest—if teens are going to have sex, better they do so safely.
  • The women’s counterpoint: Buying condoms is seen as “endorsing sex,” whereas simply talking about it is acceptable.
  • Quote:

    “The line for them was you're endorsing it if you go out and you buy the condoms with them.”
    – Bert ([04:05])

  • Bert laments being outnumbered:

    “It was one guy fighting off five women. Finally, I just gave up.”
    – Bert ([04:45])

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2. Endorsement vs. Harm Reduction

• The cast discusses whether providing condoms actively encourages sexual activity, or simply acknowledges reality and minimizes risk.
• Stacy’s Logic:

  “Unless you want your kid to get married at 18 and save themselves, then you gotta get realistic about it... I just think it's ridiculous you're gonna turn a blind eye to it and let Hayden… get an STD over giving them a condom.”
  – Stacy ([07:09])

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3. Gender Lines: Sons, Daughters, & Double Standards

• [05:42–08:17] Are parents more willing to help daughters access birth control (i.e., pills) than sons get condoms?
  • Lisa suggests discomfort may be greater for parents buying condoms for sons, because condoms force parents to consider the actual act of sex.
  • Quote:

    “I guarantee those women would take their daughters to get the birth control pill... If you're actually buying condoms for your son, you can think of the physical act that would involve using that.”
    – Lisa ([07:40])

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4. Listener Calls: Real World Perspectives

• [08:18–10:51]
  • Caller #1: Placed both daughters on IUDs and also bought condoms for them (not with them, but for them).

    “Actually got an IUD for both of my daughters.”
    – Caller ([08:37]) “They do. One of them [knows to use condoms for STD protection].”
    – Caller ([08:49])

  • Cast points out the importance of dual protection (contraception + STD prevention).
  • Caller #2 (Crystal): Placed her 12-year-old daughter on birth control, citing ever-younger ages for sexual activity. Her doctor facilitated open discussions about sex for her child.

    “I think it's good parenting to provide contraceptives for your kids. And I also wanted to just say that I did get my daughter put on birth control when she was 12.”
    – Crystal ([09:52]) “The age now for kids having sex is really young.”
    – Crystal ([10:08])

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5. Parental Responsibility & Cultural Shifts

• Recognizes the cultural shift in attitudes toward adolescent sexuality and parental involvement.
• The cast, especially Stacy and Lisa, advocate for honest, realistic conversations and proactive safety—all while acknowledging discomfort and generational gaps.
• Lisa points out: Once a child returns for a second box of condoms, it’s tangible proof they are actually using them, a “real” aspect that differentiates condoms from daily pills ([09:03]).

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Endorsement:

  “The argument was that you're endorsing your child having sex if you buy them condoms. Well, I mean, the same argument can be made with the birth control.”
  – Lisa ([09:34])

• On Parenting Reality:

  “All those rules came when people were getting married when they were 18 years old. Guess what? No. People don’t get married until… what, 26, 44?”
  – Stacy ([07:06])

• On Double Standards:

  “If you're buying the pill for your daughter, you should also be buying her condoms. Cause that doesn't protect against STDs.”
  – Stacy ([08:01])

• Bert Feeling Alone in the Argument:

  “Where were you guys all Saturday night? Sure could have used some backup.”
  – Bert ([10:34])

• Lisa’s Humor:

  “They were probably making a condom run for their horny little sons.”
  – Lisa ([10:55])

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Key Segment Timestamps

• [02:02] – Bert introduces the central “condom debate” story
• [04:04] – Women at dinner object: buying is endorsement
• [05:42] – Conversation pivots to gender double standards
• [07:09] – Stacy passionately advocates for harm reduction
• [08:18] – Callers chime in with real-life approaches
• [10:34] – Bert laments lack of support at the dinner as many listeners agree with him

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Final Thoughts

The Bert Show unpacks the complexities and cultural taboos of sex education within families—humorous, blunt, and often divided. The conversation is candid and unfiltered, blending Bert’s entertaining storytelling with the cast’s realistic, sometime exasperated takes. Their open, sometimes irreverent exchanges provide both comic relief and valuable perspectives for parents navigating modern adolescence.

For listeners new and old, this episode is a strong reminder that while opinions differ, open dialogue and practical action—however awkward—may be a parent’s most loving choice.

Transcript

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[Bert]

You guys ever been in the very awkward situation to where you're sitting around with your significant other, right? And a whole bunch of other people and politics come up or some serious issues come up and you don't Realize until that very moment how different your opinion is of your significant other to a point to where it gets tense while there are other people around.

[Lisa]

I don't think it's ever happened with politics or something serious. But there's nothing more awkward than the brewing fight in mixed company. Is that what you're alluding to?

[Bert]

This really wasn't. No, no, no. That wasn't a brewing fight. It was just something that still shocked you.

[Stacy]

I think it's shocking to have something about your spouse still shock you.

[Bert]

Yeah. And it wasn't even about Stacey. Here's what happened. We were all sitting around at DIN Saturday night, and one of the women that we were sitting with brought up the fact that we had new kids on the block on the air and the fact that Danny Wood said this. Is that strange for you? Picking out body deodorant with your sons?

[Lisa]

Not stranger. Picking out condoms with them.

[Bert]

Are you doing that?

[Lisa]

They're 16 and 17.

[Bert]

Yeah, you gotta tell us about that. Wait a sec.

[Lisa]

Yeah, you gotta be straight up, you know, with your kids. I've been having talks with them about that since they were like 11.

[Bert]

So this particular woman said she listened to that and she, like, became an anti Danny Wood fan right after that.

[Lisa]

Oh, really?

[Bert]

Because of his stand on buying condoms for his kids.

[Caller/Commentator]

Okay.

[Bert]

So I started to say I think it was ridiculous. And it became more of a conversation on should you buy condoms for your children or not? And I was the only one in the group. There were six women at the five women at the table and me. And I was the only one saying, yeah, I kind of think that maybe you should. They were so against it. Why so against it?

[Stacy]

They would rather have their kids impregnate young girls.

[Caller/Commentator]

Or did they even talk about how they comfortable with talking about condoms in general?

[Bert]

Yes, talking was fine.

[Caller/Commentator]

Buying was not.

[Bert]

The line for them was you're endorsing it if you go out and you buy the condoms with them. And I felt. My point was I would want Hayden to come to me to talk about it. And my feeling is that it's. It's going to happen. It's going to happen. You could preach abstinence. Chances are pretty good they're going to give in to their feelings. And I thought, look, if he has those thoughts and he really wants to do that, we'll talk about it first. And if it comes down to that, I want to be there to help. I want to get condoms with them. So I would do that. So it's going to be uncomfortable, but I'D rather have me doing it than have the school supply condoms. There wasn't a woman at the table that agreed with me.

[Stacy]

Are you serious?

[Bert]

Even your wife. They were all. I mean, it was one guy fighting off five women. Finally, I just gave up. Even Stacy, she was the most passionate about it. She was. It almost broke out into an argument because we were both so passionate about both sides. What.

[Lisa]

So what is her argument against it? That it's an endorsement.

[Bert]

It's an endorsement to go ahead and have sex, whereas we should be preaching abstinence. But if you go and you say here, I'll.

[Lisa]

But what about the theory that they are available at a health clinic or a school clinic or generally can be purchased at a drugstore for a reasonable amount of money? Yeah, that's fine.

[Bert]

That was fine. That there's sort of a line between church and state and it shouldn't be crossed by parents. So it got so heated, I sort of put the squash on the discussion with Stacy for a later date because I didn't want to do it in front of all these other women. But I'm still curious about her position because I had no idea she felt that way.

[Caller/Commentator]

Well, I'm curious about the gender lines, too, because. All right, you are endorsing by, you know, with Hayden Hollis, when they're of age to buy condoms. The women in the room were against it, but were the women in the room provide their daughters with birth control pills?

[Bert]

Didn't ask. Don't know.

[Caller/Commentator]

What's the difference?

[Stacy]

Because under 18, you've got to have your mom's or a guardian's permission, and you got to go through the doctor.

[Caller/Commentator]

And I'm also wondering if you, if it was daughters would be as supportive of providing them with birth control. I'm just wondering if it's a gender thing or with condoms.

[Bert]

Let me ask you.

[Caller/Commentator]

The girls can have a condom supplying them with birth control?

[Bert]

Well, the first part of that is I just have to assume that they would feel the same way about the pill as they would a condom. So it's not a parent's responsibility. It would be. They would have to be educated by somebody else to go and buy those.

[Caller/Commentator]

See, I bet.

[Bert]

I bet they didn't say that.

[Caller/Commentator]

That's what I bet that I guarantee those women not all six of them would have felt the same way about birth control bills.

[Bert]

And if it was a daughter, how would you feel? It would even be more uncomfortable to do it. But I think you got to do it.

[Stacy]

I mean, I hate that. I totally agree with You, Come on, there's a difference. Have to be involved. Like you want to assume that your kids aren't going to have sex before marriage or whatever. Well, all of those rules and everything came when people were getting married when they were 18 years old. Guess what? No. You know, people don't get married until they're. I mean, what's your rule that you would prefer for your kids not to get married till after they're what, 26, 48, 44.

[Bert]

What?

[Hers Advertiser]

After?

[Lisa]

Well, by your math, Hayden turns 44 next year.

[Stacy]

You know, unless you want your kid to get married at 18 and save themselves, then you gotta get realistic about it. And if, you know, if you don't want them to have unwanted pregnancies or unwanted STDs, protect themselves from it and get real about it. I just think it's ridiculous you're gonna turn a blind eye to it and let Hayden or, you know, let any of your kids get an STD over giving them a condom.

[Bert]

I should have had you on the phone.

[Stacy]

To me. It's ridiculous. You know what I think it's naive and it's just. It's just turning a blind eye to what's really gonna happen.

[Lisa]

You know what I think the difference is? Cuz I guarantee those women would take their daughters to get the birth control, you know, the birth control pill. But the son's doing the. And you know, because I think the pill is something you ingest and it happens. Whatever. But if you're actually buying condoms for your son, you can think of the physical act that would involve using that.

[Stacy]

Well, if you're buying the pill for your daughter, you should also be buying her condoms. Cause that doesn't protect against STDs.

[Lisa]

I know, but I don't think. The thing is, you should do both. Right. But I'm thinking the reason anxiety with the condom is because it's. It's part of the physical act of doing it.

[Bert]

Hey, Lisa.

[Stacy]

I totally agree with you.

[Bert]

You're on the voice disguiser. Go ahead.

[Caller]

Is it me?

[Bert]

It's you.

[Caller]

Hi.

[Bert]

What's up? You're on the voice disguiser. You don't have to whisper. Can you speak up a little bit?

[Caller]

Is this better?

[Bert]

No.

[Lisa]

Nope.

[Caller/Commentator]

I know you're at work, but sure, go ahead.

[Caller]

Actually got an IUD for both of my daughters.

[Stacy]

And how long does that last?

[Caller]

Five years.

[Stacy]

Five years.

[Bert]

Does your husband know? Yes, he does.

[Caller]

And he's very happy now.

[Stacy]

Do they also know they need to use protection?

[Caller]

They do. One of them.

[Stacy]

Sorry. Getting very mad about this wow. Because they won't get knocked up, but they can still get some funk.

[Bert]

Did you buy, did you go and buy the condoms with them also?

[Caller]

Yeah.

[Bert]

You did.

[Caller]

Not with them, but for them.

[Lisa]

Because that's what the. I agree with you. If you just get someone the pill, your daughter the pill, then, hey, I'm getting her these pills just so she's safe. There's no guarantee that she's using them. But the second time that your son or daughter asks you for condoms, that means they used up the first box. And, you know, there's no doubt in your mind. There's absolutely no. Like, the pill gets taken every day, prescription gets refilled every month, whether they do it or don't do it. But once. Once they need that box of condoms.

[Stacy]

But it's.

[Caller/Commentator]

But the principle is the same. I mean, the idea, the argument that the women made the other night with Bert is that you're endorsing your child having sex if you buy them condoms. Well, I mean, the same argument can be made with the birth control.

[Bert]

Good morning, Crystal. You're on Q100.

[Caller]

Good morning.

[Bert]

Hello.

[Caller]

Hi. I love the show. I listen every morning.

[Bert]

Thank you.

[Caller/Commentator]

Thank you.

[Caller]

And my comment, I just wanted to say that I think it's good parenting to provide contraceptives for your kids. And I also wanted to just say that I did get my daughter put on birth control when she was 12.

[Bert]

12, wow.

[Caller]

Just because the age now for kids having sex is really young.

[Bert]

Did she indicate to you at all that she needed that at 12 or did you just assume it?

[Caller]

Yes.

[Bert]

You just assumed that she needed to be on birth control at 12?

[Caller]

Yes. And I just took her to the doctor. And they were the pediatricians that I go to. They actually have an on site person that helps you talk to your kids about sex. And we just decided that was the way to go. My husband and I did. It was my idea, though.

[Bert]

That's a different topic for another time. Do you go ahead and get like aggressive with it and suggest it or do you wait till them. They come to you at 12 years old? I wouldn't have thought of that. I would take more calls, but everybody's calling saying the same thing. You should have the talk and you should go get the condoms. Where were you guys all Saturday night? Sure could have used some backup.

[Lisa]

They were probably making a condom run for their horny little sons.

[Stacy]

I'm curious where they're coming from on that argument. I mean, I would have loved to hear how they were even arguing against you.

[Bert]

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