← The Bert Show
Loading summary
Transcript1 lines
- [00:01]
A
Support is available 24. 7 with VRBoCare. We're here day or night, ready whenever you need help. Because a great trip starts with the right support. Whether it's a birthday trip, a family reunion or just a fun getaway. Booking a VRBO vacation rental means no worrying about surprises. VRBoCare and 24.7Life Support have your back if something's off. The loved by guest filter helps you find top rated homes. And verified reviews mean real feedback from real VRBO guests so you know exactly what you're booking. Honestly, I just booked my VRBO because there was a sweet wine fridge. Hey, we all have our reasons. Don't walk into a surprise if you know you. VRBO terms apply. See vrbo.com trust for details. The Birch show so Jen brought it to our attention yesterday that David Hasselhoff a on one side. It's kind of sad because it seems like every time we're talking about dude, now he's hammered in one shape, way shape or form, you know. And it happened again a couple of nights ago. Yeah, this is at the MTV Europe Music Awards and they were talking about the celebration. Melissa told us about it yesterday. The celebration of the anniversary of the Berlin Wall coming down. It was what, 20. 20 years. 20 year anniversary. So that's what he's talking about here. But he's definitely slurring through it all. Oh, and remember. Oh, I'm sorry, honey. And remember, he's a huge sensation in Germany too. So I think that's another reason why. And he's speaking German a little bit in here. And then. Are you sure? When he's supposed to say. When he's supposed to say that he is presenting the. Listen to what he says. I've been looking for freedom, yo. Wow. 20 years, huh? All this club. I am not responsible for the wall coming down. These Germans are responsible for the wall coming down. They are responsible for the wall coming down because they believed in freedom, Braveheart. And they never gave up. Hi. We get good. We get good. Olive Claw. Tonight I'm here to. To represent the best Rock award. Now the nominees are. No, you're here to present not represent. Slow. Yeah, and I've been there before too, where you think you're just so convinced in your own head. If you just slow down the words said, it's going to make perfect sense for everybody. Right? When everybody stumbles and everybody screws up. But it did seem, you know, he appears to be intoxicated. So I listened to that yesterday and I realized that if you slow down the audio you can make anybody sound drunk. So here is Lady Gaga pimping her new album. Slowed down. She was fine at the time. But if you slow it down, you can make her sound drunk. There's two deluxe editions, and actually, the packaging is going to be running and changing over the next year. So for the super Gaga fans, you can collect all different kinds of covers. For those of you who have my record and you don't want to buy the old one again, you can go on itunes and you can just complete. You can make anybody sound drunk. Jon Gosselin and Hailey Glassman bicker on camera, both drunk. When we slow it down. Even when I'm sitting in this interview and I hear you talk saying that you're gonna be more honest and loyal, I roll my eyes like the rest of the world. Oh, my God. What do. I don't know. I don't want to do this. Oh, my God. This whole thing's uncomfortable. I don't like it. I mean, you're telling me out there that you love me and you want to be with me and then. But it's not healthy. Oh, my God. It's true. Are you able to do that? How did Josh. Josh loaded. I have no idea how the equipment around here works. Oh, hilarious. It's like a big party on Friday nights. Oh, my God, that's wonderful. Here's Laura Bush telling Jay Leno what's on her ipod. When she slowed down, she sounds hammered. I think they might be surprised to know that I'm a Rastafarian and I have Bob Marley on my ipod. That's hilarious. This is Larry King asking Mariah Carey about having kids drunk. Do you want to have children? No. Yes. But this particular moment. And by this particular moment, I mean this month or the next month. I'm out of control. And finally, Barack Obama on the health care bill passing through the House. He's hammered years. We've been told that this couldn't be done. After all, neither chamber of Congress has been able to pass a comprehensive health insurance reform bill for generations. He's been pushed to this point. But last night, the House proved differently. Oh, my God. That's great. You can do it. Anybody? Well, half the time we come in here, I think we are drunk. Well, you have to do. I think that'd be funny. Take any break. Specifically. Yes. Any break that we talked about. Okay. That would be all down and randomly. We'll come in here from time to time and go, jen must have been drunk yesterday. And just play something from yesterday's show. Only if you're included. Oh no, the bird Show. Hi, my name is Lisa and I'm a licensed psychotherapist, which means my work doesn't magically end when the session does. There are notes to write, appointments to manage, billing, insurance, follow ups, and somehow all that admin used to creep into my nights and weekends. That's why I switched to SimplePractice. SimplePractice is an all in one electronic health record built specifically for therapists with HIPAA compliant tools and high trust certification so I don't have to worry about juggling systems or cutting corners just to keep things running. Scheduling, documentation, billing, insurance, client communications, even automated appointment reminders. It all lives in one place. And if you're starting or growing a practice, Simple Practice also offers a credentialing service that helps simplify insurance enrollment can be a huge lift when you're starting to scale. Right now, Simple Practice is celebrating Mental Health Provider Day with an exclusive offer. Up to 70% off for one year. Yes, up to 70% off for one Year. But hurry. Offer ends May 15th at SimplePractice. Com SimplePractice. Com.