Vault: Someone Got Into A Fight Over Calling Shotgun?!

Summary

The Bert Show: Vault – Someone Got Into A Fight Over Calling Shotgun?!
Episode Date: December 19, 2025
Podcast Host: Pionaire Podcasting
Cast: Bert, Kristin, Abby, Cassie, Tommy & the Bert Show Cast
Summary by Expert Podcast Summarizer

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Overview

This episode of The Bert Show dives humorously into a universal and surprisingly ageless phenomenon: why people—kids, siblings, friends—will do almost anything to avoid the backseat and claim the coveted front passenger seat, aka “shotgun.” The hosts and callers share personal stories of “shotgun” protocol, heated (often physical) battles for the front seat, and the underlying social dynamics driving this age-old contest. The discussion is lighthearted, nostalgic, and packed with relatable anecdotes from childhood through adulthood.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Parking-Lot Brawl (01:23 – 02:43)

• Ryan’s Story:
  Ryan recounts watching two teenage brothers break into a physical altercation in the parking lot of a Kroger, fighting over who would get the front seat of their mom’s car:
  • “Both kids go on their side of the car and immediately start fighting about who is going to get the front seat.” (02:01, Ryan)
  • He observes that even as a bystander, the intensity of the desire for the front seat is relatable.

2. Why Is Shotgun So Valued? (02:50 – 03:58)

• Social Hierarchy & Status:
  Hosts compare riding shotgun to a status symbol:
  • “You’re the favorite friend… The sucky friends get in the backseat. It is.” (03:05, Host 1)
  • “It’s like a royalty position… the backseat, you have to lean forward to get in on the conversation… You have no control over the radio.” (03:15, Guest 1)
  • Small perks are cited: better control of radio, more legroom, easier participation in conversation, sometimes even air conditioning bias.

3. Backseat Woes & Polite Offerings (03:58 – 04:23)

• Faux Generosity:
  • Host 1 admits offering the seat out of politeness but feeling miffed if someone accepts:
    • “If I offer somebody the front seat and they take it, then I’m standing there dumbfounded, like, well, you’re not supposed to take it.” (03:58, Host 1)

4. The Fight Never Ends—For Kids or Adults (04:10 – 06:59)

• Producer Tracy’s Anecdote (04:10):
  • Even 21-year-old sisters still get into shoving matches over the front seat.
• Birthday Privileges:
  • “Every time your birthday came around… you always rode in the passenger seat as the kid. I was… walking all the way into the front seat, like, look at you. Y’all got to scrunch back in the back seat… I’m the birthday girl.” (05:49, Host 1)
• Adulthood Petty Battles:
  • Callers in their 20s and beyond admit still vying for shotgun using childhood methods like “rock, paper, scissors”:
    • “My friends call shotgun, we’ll call challenge, and then they’ll do the rock, paper, scissors and you can challenge again. It goes on and on.” (06:40, Caller Jen)
  • Ryan jokes about seniors at a retirement home still calling shotgun.

5. Creative Strategies for Getting Shotgun (04:45 – 05:24)

• Medical Exemptions:
  • Guest 1 exploits his tall stature; others make up excuses for the seat, feigning car sickness or the need to “stretch out” due to surgery scars.

6. Shotgun in Unusual Situations (07:00 – 07:06)

• Unsuccessful Attempt at Humor:
  • Guest 1 quips about trying to call shotgun when getting arrested, “but it didn’t work—cops still put me in the back.” (07:00, Guest 1)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• "You’re the favorite friend… The sucky friends get in the backseat." — Host 1 (03:05)
• "It’s like a royalty position... the backseat, you have to lean forward to get in on the conversation. You have no control over the radio." — Guest 1 (03:15)
• "If I offer somebody the front seat and they take it, then I’m standing there dumbfounded, like, well, you’re not supposed to take it." — Host 1 (03:58)
• "Even 21-year-old sisters still get into shoving matches to ride in the front seat. It never goes away." — Producer Tracy via Ryan (04:10)
• "Every time your birthday came around… you always rode in the passenger seat as the kid… look at me, I’m the birthday girl. I’m in the passenger seat." — Host 1 (05:49)
• "My friends call shotgun, we'll call challenge, and then they'll do the rock, paper, scissors… It goes on and on." — Caller Jen (06:40)
• "I tried that one time when I was getting arrested. I said shotgun, and it just… it didn’t work. Cops still put me in the back." — Guest 1 (07:00)

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Key Timestamps

• 01:23: Ryan introduces “shotgun fight” topic – recounts seeing a parking lot brawl.
• 02:30: Guests identify with the fight and discuss the allure of the front seat.
• 03:05: Social status of the front seat explained.
• 04:10: Producer Tracy shares adult sibling “shotgun” story.
• 05:09: Ryan’s recent front seat relief among friends.
• 05:24: Height, medical, or faux excuses for claiming shotgun.
• 05:49: Birthday privilege story with siblings.
• 06:23: Caller Jen, age 22, describes continued “shotgun” rituals among friends.
• 06:40: Rock-paper-scissors “shotgun” escalation.
• 07:00: Humorous “shotgun” fail during an arrest.

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Tone & Style

The episode is lively, nostalgic, and self-deprecatingly funny. The hosts and callers keep the mood light and relatable, riffing on childhood competitiveness and the quirks of social protocol that never seem to fade, no matter how old we get.

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Bottom Line:
Whether you’re 12, 22, or 62, there’s something timeless (and a little bit ridiculous) about calling “shotgun.” This episode of The Bert Show mines all the humor, awkwardness, and nostalgia from a tradition that’s equal parts social pecking order and childish glee.

Transcript

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[Host 1]

Today.

[Ryan]

The Bird show. I want us to spend a second dissecting one social phenomenon that has been passed down from generation to generation that I saw come to a head in a fight the other day.

[Host 1]

You saw a fight?

[Ryan]

I saw a fight the other day.

[Host 1]

A fist fight.

[Ryan]

It was a fist fight. A wrestling fight. Awesome. Okay. I haven't seen a fight in years. I don't think this appeared to me between, to be between brothers. I am, I'm at the gym working out and I'm on the treadmill. And the way my gym is set up, it's like on the second story. So I can. And it's set up in a big like strip mall. There's a Kroger right there and, and there's a big parking lot. So as I'm working out on the treadmill, I'm looking out and kind of gazing off and seeing what's going on in the parking lot. And I notice one mom who appears to be in her, I don't know, mid-40s, you know, and it appears that she's got like two teenage boys with her and they're all getting ready to get into their big Tahoe or suburban or whatever it is. Right. So mom goes into the car and closes the door, and both kids go on their side of the car and. And immediately start fighting about who is going to get the front seat.

[Guest 1]

Shotguns.

[Ryan]

Shotguns. You can almost see them both say shotgun. All right. And they couldn't come to a conclusion on it to the point where they started pushing each other and wrestling with each other in the parking lot of the Kroger.

[Host 1]

And how old are these people?

[Ryan]

It could have been anywhere from 12 to 15 years old. I mean, they were really starting to go at it over that front seat.

[Host 1]

Oh, yeah.

[Ryan]

And I remember having the same feel, like, all the way. I still have it. Like, if there are three guys going out and I don't want. I never want to be the guy in the back seat. I want to be the guy in the coveted passenger spot. And I want to know what's so great about that seat that we would fight over it.

[Host 1]

It's almost like it's. You're the favorite. You're the favorite friend. Like, if you're next to the driver, so you're important. The sucky friends get in the backseat. It is.

[Guest 1]

It's almost like. It's like a royalty position. It's like there's the president, the vice president, and then there's the secretary of arms or whatever. Yeah, the backseat. You have to lean forward to get in on the conversation. You have no control over the radio.

[Host 1]

The radio is always so much louder in the backseat, so you can't even, like, hear yourself talk. You don't get the air conditioning sometimes.

[Guest 1]

Yeah, you're like the navigator. That's what I always was. My buddy, Scott Griever, he had the car. I was the navigator. So I controlled the radio, the equalizer, the ac. It was all about the front seat, backseat. The only thing in the backseat was like, eh, throw me a bag of potato chips, you God.

[Ryan]

But you act like you're back there all by. Like, it's four miles that you're away from your friends. I mean, they're within earshot. You could get in on the conversation. The view is pretty much the same from the back seat as it is the front passenger side seat.

[Host 1]

But then you try to be the good friend. Like, oh, no, you get in the front seat. No, no, no. You get in the front seat and then. But if I offer somebody the front seat and they take it, then I'm standing there dumbfounded, like, well, you're not supposed to take it.

[Ryan]

Producer Tracy just sent me an instant message and said, that two weeks ago she was out with her mom and her sister and her and her 21 year old sister got in a shoving match to ride in the front seat. It never goes away.

[Host 1]

It never goes away. I had a friend in college who would lie and say that she would get car to everybody so that she never had to go in the backseat. That was always her excuse. Well, you know, I gotta ride up front cause I get really car sick in the back. She didn't get car sick, she just wanted the passenger seat.

[Guest 1]

See, now I almost have like a handicap sticker because being so tall, everybody just assumes that I need to get in the front seat. So they give it up to me anyway, which is pretty cool.

[Host 1]

Anyway, maybe I need to use the whole kidney thing. Like my scar, I gotta stretch out because I got a scar.

[Ryan]

There you go. I went out with a couple of guys to the Braves game on what, two nights ago. And it was a guy that I know fairly well and a new guy. So we were doing the whole polite thing. Hey, do you want to sit in the front seat? No, you sit in the front seat. No, you sit in the front seat. And he took the back seat. And I gotta tell you, I was so relieved.

[Host 1]

You liked him even better. Like, you're like, okay, he can be in our group now. I felt like a loser.

[Ryan]

I was like, yay, I get the front seat.

[Host 1]

Now as the driver, have you ever been disappointed by the person that ends up getting the front seat? Like. Cause as a driver you don't want to appoint things necessarily in the back of your mind.

[Ryan]

You have no, because there's some comfort in knowing that you're in the front seat no matter what you're driving.

[Host 1]

That's true, that's true.

[Ryan]

Hey, Sarah.

[Caller]

Hey.

[Ryan]

Hi.

[Caller]

Me and my sister, I'm 13 and my sister's 16 and we both do it all the time. What we do though is when we get out there, my dad will look at both of us and we'll both just be like running towards the front seat. And there's been times where we've fought each other in the garage. Like fist fights in the garage over the front seat.

[Host 1]

Oh, totally. That is a very, like, bird said it's a very coveted seat. Because I know I am one of three children in my family and it birthdays like it was known. Every time your birthday came around, whatever you did that day, you always rode in the passenger seat as the kid. So I'm the youngest by far. So when I was in elementary school, my brother and sister were in high school and bullies. And so when it was my birthday, I was. I mean, I was like walking all the way into the front seat, like, look at you. Y' all got a scrunch back in the back seat. 16, 18 years old, and look at me, I'm the birthday girl. I'm in the passenger seat.

[Ryan]

Hey, Jen, you're on all the hits. Q100.

[Caller]

Hey, yeah, me and my friends, I'm 22 and we still do it.

[Ryan]

Still at 20. Yeah. It never goes away. I think if you're 60 years old and you're driving away from the retirement home with your buddies in the car, Shotgun.

[Guest 1]

That's a shotgun.

[Ryan]

You're still doing rock, paper, scissors.

[Caller]

This year, my friends call shotgun. We'll call challenge, and then they'll do the rock, paper, scissors and you can challenge again. It goes on and on. I'm just like, come on, get in the car.

[Host 1]

Oh, you know, every time, every time you're going out on the weekend, it's a group of you and you're walking to the car. Everybody's got that mental thing. Keep going. Okay, who's going? Who's gonna get it? Exactly.

[Ryan]

Never goes away, man.

[Guest 1]

I tried that one time when I was getting arrested. I said shotgun, and it just. It didn't work. Cops still put me in the back.

[Ryan]

Still in the back no matter what.

[Guest 1]

Yeah, it just didn't work.

[Ryan]

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