The Bert Show: Vault – Someone Got Into A Fight Over Calling Shotgun?!
Episode Date: December 19, 2025
Podcast Host: Pionaire Podcasting
Cast: Bert, Kristin, Abby, Cassie, Tommy & the Bert Show Cast
Summary by Expert Podcast Summarizer

Overview

This episode of The Bert Show dives humorously into a universal and surprisingly ageless phenomenon: why people—kids, siblings, friends—will do almost anything to avoid the backseat and claim the coveted front passenger seat, aka “shotgun.” The hosts and callers share personal stories of “shotgun” protocol, heated (often physical) battles for the front seat, and the underlying social dynamics driving this age-old contest. The discussion is lighthearted, nostalgic, and packed with relatable anecdotes from childhood through adulthood.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Parking-Lot Brawl (01:23 – 02:43)

• Ryan’s Story:
  Ryan recounts watching two teenage brothers break into a physical altercation in the parking lot of a Kroger, fighting over who would get the front seat of their mom’s car:
  • “Both kids go on their side of the car and immediately start fighting about who is going to get the front seat.” (02:01, Ryan)
  • He observes that even as a bystander, the intensity of the desire for the front seat is relatable.

2. Why Is Shotgun So Valued? (02:50 – 03:58)

• Social Hierarchy & Status:
  Hosts compare riding shotgun to a status symbol:
  • “You’re the favorite friend… The sucky friends get in the backseat. It is.” (03:05, Host 1)
  • “It’s like a royalty position… the backseat, you have to lean forward to get in on the conversation… You have no control over the radio.” (03:15, Guest 1)
  • Small perks are cited: better control of radio, more legroom, easier participation in conversation, sometimes even air conditioning bias.

3. Backseat Woes & Polite Offerings (03:58 – 04:23)

• Faux Generosity:
  • Host 1 admits offering the seat out of politeness but feeling miffed if someone accepts:
    • “If I offer somebody the front seat and they take it, then I’m standing there dumbfounded, like, well, you’re not supposed to take it.” (03:58, Host 1)

4. The Fight Never Ends—For Kids or Adults (04:10 – 06:59)

• Producer Tracy’s Anecdote (04:10):
  • Even 21-year-old sisters still get into shoving matches over the front seat.
• Birthday Privileges:
  • “Every time your birthday came around… you always rode in the passenger seat as the kid. I was… walking all the way into the front seat, like, look at you. Y’all got to scrunch back in the back seat… I’m the birthday girl.” (05:49, Host 1)
• Adulthood Petty Battles:
  • Callers in their 20s and beyond admit still vying for shotgun using childhood methods like “rock, paper, scissors”:
    • “My friends call shotgun, we’ll call challenge, and then they’ll do the rock, paper, scissors and you can challenge again. It goes on and on.” (06:40, Caller Jen)
  • Ryan jokes about seniors at a retirement home still calling shotgun.

5. Creative Strategies for Getting Shotgun (04:45 – 05:24)

• Medical Exemptions:
  • Guest 1 exploits his tall stature; others make up excuses for the seat, feigning car sickness or the need to “stretch out” due to surgery scars.

6. Shotgun in Unusual Situations (07:00 – 07:06)

• Unsuccessful Attempt at Humor:
  • Guest 1 quips about trying to call shotgun when getting arrested, “but it didn’t work—cops still put me in the back.” (07:00, Guest 1)

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• "You’re the favorite friend… The sucky friends get in the backseat." — Host 1 (03:05)
• "It’s like a royalty position... the backseat, you have to lean forward to get in on the conversation. You have no control over the radio." — Guest 1 (03:15)
• "If I offer somebody the front seat and they take it, then I’m standing there dumbfounded, like, well, you’re not supposed to take it." — Host 1 (03:58)
• "Even 21-year-old sisters still get into shoving matches to ride in the front seat. It never goes away." — Producer Tracy via Ryan (04:10)
• "Every time your birthday came around… you always rode in the passenger seat as the kid… look at me, I’m the birthday girl. I’m in the passenger seat." — Host 1 (05:49)
• "My friends call shotgun, we'll call challenge, and then they'll do the rock, paper, scissors… It goes on and on." — Caller Jen (06:40)
• "I tried that one time when I was getting arrested. I said shotgun, and it just… it didn’t work. Cops still put me in the back." — Guest 1 (07:00)

Key Timestamps

• 01:23: Ryan introduces “shotgun fight” topic – recounts seeing a parking lot brawl.
• 02:30: Guests identify with the fight and discuss the allure of the front seat.
• 03:05: Social status of the front seat explained.
• 04:10: Producer Tracy shares adult sibling “shotgun” story.
• 05:09: Ryan’s recent front seat relief among friends.
• 05:24: Height, medical, or faux excuses for claiming shotgun.
• 05:49: Birthday privilege story with siblings.
• 06:23: Caller Jen, age 22, describes continued “shotgun” rituals among friends.
• 06:40: Rock-paper-scissors “shotgun” escalation.
• 07:00: Humorous “shotgun” fail during an arrest.

Tone & Style

The episode is lively, nostalgic, and self-deprecatingly funny. The hosts and callers keep the mood light and relatable, riffing on childhood competitiveness and the quirks of social protocol that never seem to fade, no matter how old we get.

Bottom Line:
Whether you’re 12, 22, or 62, there’s something timeless (and a little bit ridiculous) about calling “shotgun.” This episode of The Bert Show mines all the humor, awkwardness, and nostalgia from a tradition that’s equal parts social pecking order and childish glee.