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Host
Visit your nearby Lowes
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the Birch Show.
Adult Commentator
All right, the student vent line here you just. Sometimes you just got to get it out.
Yeah, especially students are, you know, just tired of being in school. It's rainy today and I don't know,
Christmas break is right around the corner
and you're just like sick of your teachers and your classmates. Everybody's driving you nuts.
Everything's so dramatic. It is emotional and it hurts and it's wonderful and it's awful and, you know, so they need a way to get that out because sometimes, you know,
Host
people just don't understand.
Adult Commentator
Most of the times, especially adults, you
don't understand because we haven't been there.
Because you're old and you don't. I mean, you're just not in the
Know, it's fun to listen to these because they will bring you right back to seventh grade or the ninth grade. But if you are a student and you want to use our vent line. 404-25-53535.
Teen Caller
Guys suck. I just want to say to the guy out there at my school, thank you for just using me, flirting with me, acting like I'm your girlfriend at school. But no, no, when. As soon as your real girlfriend comes around, I'm nothing to you. Like, oh, and then your best friend who wants to go around and flirt with me, but then when we all get back at school, he acts like a complete jerk. Oh my gosh. Like, I can't stand guys sometimes. So for the guy who's used to me for the past couple months, like, I'm done with you. Completely done.
Adult Commentator
You're also going to notice that some of these will translate into the adult world also.
I was going to say she could have been any age.
Really. I have always maintained that none of us really evolved from like the 8th grade problems are still the same.
That's true.
Teen Caller
Hi, my vet. Is that Spanish? I cannot speak than Spanish. I absolutely hate it. And I'm in the IB program, so it's very complicated for me. Thank you very show.
Bye.
The stuff they made you do in
Adult Commentator
that class in Spanish.
Teen Caller
Yeah.
Adult Commentator
You had to talk Spanish and the teacher never talked Spanish in the class.
Imagine that.
Well, you never had to talk until the final exam. So I could get her drift somewhere.
The Spanish lost me. Like I always got Spanish 1 and 2 was no problem, right? Because we're keeping it pretty simple. You're talking about just new words, but then you get all past tense and present past tense. And I could not get past Spanish too.
Really?
That was it for me.
I took Spanish 1, 2, 3 and 4. Then I went to college and I took Spanish 1 and 2.
You don't remember Nothing, but you could
probably read words if you go to another country. You could read the menu or read the street signs.
I do okay. But I'm telling you, I went to four full years of Spanish in high school and two full semesters in college. Like I should be.
You'd be able to hold the conversation Barely.
I should be. I should be better than I am.
I can hear Spanish being spoken and I know what's happening in the conversation because I'll pick up a word here and a word there.
But that's how I am with French.
But that's it for the most part. Not at all.
Teen Caller
I like her a Lot. And she. And she broke up with me, and I still like her a lot. Like, a lot lot. And then she goes and just, like, blows me off, and she goes and talks to other guys, even while she's bringing up. But yeah. So I don't know what to do right now. So she gets him out. Call me back.
Aw, punk. And did he say call me back?
Host
Yes.
Adult Commentator
He's my friend. I want a guy to say, I like her a lot, lot, because that means more than a lot.
You're going out with a girl for, like, three weeks, and you tell her that you like her a lot, lot. You're gonna get far.
Awesome. That's awesome. Totally gonna get up her shirt the
first time that you're heartbroken, man.
Oh, poor thing, buddy.
Oh, that hurts. And you have to see her at
school and flirting with her.
Have the same classes.
Hurts.
Teen Caller
Okay, I'm bi, and I'm a freshman in high school. Having problems with the fact that everybody treats me differently because I have a girlfriend. So I don't know whether or not to just say to you, I don't need you. Let me know what you think.
I don't know.
Adult Commentator
What do you think? Well, that's tough. Gosh. I mean, brave man.
Yeah.
I mean, I can't relate because I stayed in the closet till I was out of college. I mean, I am so admirable of kids who are willing to stand up for. I mean, it doesn't even have to be, you know, she said she's bisexual. It doesn't have to be that. Anything that a young kid stands up for, I am. I admire because I. I was. I was a coward when I was.
You just want to fit in. You just. Just want to fit in. Don't be noticed.
Right.
Teen Caller
You know, being gay and having your head shoved in toilets and swirlies.
That is the worst thing possible.
Okay, so my parents keep getting onto me about my grades, and I'm trying to pull them up, but it's really hard because I'm one of those girls where I care about my social life, so I have no idea what to do. Not to mention my stepdad wants me to get a job if I don't do anything after school.
He's dumb, but.
Yeah. Thanks.
Adult Commentator
Sometimes you're just gonna have to live with your unreasonable parents asking you to get good grades and a job and stuff like that.
I care about my social life.
If my child told me I care
about my social, I laugh.
I think I would laugh out loud.
I would.
I would laugh the same way. I laugh at a five year old using the F word.
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For real.
Teen Caller
Okay, well, I'm a junior, I go to Rockdale. And my mom, she's seriously crazy. She won't let me go to any parties without there being chaperones. She won't let me go hang out with my friends without meeting their parents. She don't even let me drive my own car.
Car.
And then like I have friends like in different counties. She wanted me going see them. She really, really crazy. And then she, she feels like she can control me. But I only have one more year left. Why not let me do what I want? You know, crazy right now. And I'm really trying to move away from her. So. Yeah. Bye.
Adult Commentator
So what she's suggesting here is I think she said she's a rising senior right between her junior and senior year. So she's just saying, mom, leave me. I got it all worked out. Just leave me alone for one year.
I'm an adult now. Don't you remember that though? You're just so ready, so ready to go to college. I was so ready to go to college for like a year before I was able to go. Yes, you're just ready for your independence at that stage.
See, I don't think I was because I was such a nerd in high school and was so like, gotta get into a good college, gotta get into a good college that I only think I started enjoying high school once I got my acceptance letters to college. And so then I had like one year that was all chill and senior year and everything was fun. And then I'm like, it's over. Like this is what everybody's been doing. You know, the ones who are still in Syracuse as auto mechanics are great work spent all. It's so much fun in high school.
I couldn't wait to get out of there and get to college. I couldn't wait. Now I know I wasn't ready for it. Cause I mean I was done in six months because I drank so much and partied so much. But I couldn't wait. Suffocating in that house.
In high school I had the earliest curfew of anybody I knew in high school. Everybody curfew. I think the latest that it ever was was 11 o'.
Clock.
And that was like 11. Yeah, that was it. Like that was end of my senior year. Like, and all my friends could say it till 12. 1 spend the night out, drive like all that kind of stuff. 11 in the house, lockdown.
My parents are like, so long as you come back by December dude, we're cool. Just, you know, I know it's July, but just.
But you still went nuts in college.
I did, Yeah. I went nuts because usually the people
that had more freedom in high school didn't go as crazy in college.
It's such a long yes and no to that question. But it would be such a long explanation of how my dad was really controlling, but really would allow me to just stay out.
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He.
Adult Commentator
He doesn't care.
Right.
Care at one point, but with other things, was so controlling that when I got to college, man, I had zero discipline. I can't believe I lasted six months
after I came home.
Teen Caller
I hate color.
Adult Commentator
Oh, sorry. I was just gonna say, after I came home from my first semester at Florida State, my dad was like, now you got the social life thing down, but if the grades don't come up, you're not going back. And I was like, okay. It just took me one semester to just party and go a little crazy. And then it was like, okay, get it together.
Teen Caller
Applications. Oh, my God, I'm about to punch a baby. That's how much I hate. Seriously. You know how college is all encouraging about, you know, you going to college, getting a higher education? Well, guess what? When you have to require about 10 bajillion essays for them, it doesn't exactly help their case. So, yeah, I hate college application goodbye.
Adult Commentator
It does.
It's always stressful and filling it out and the essay questions and if you had to get references for it and yeah, it's a lot.
It should just be easy. You should just be able to call up and go, hey, I want to go to your school. And based on a 30 second conversation, they should say yes or no.
You're here.
I'm here.
Let me in. Let's just get it done. We know you need my money.
Hello.
Just let me in.
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The Birch show
during Memorial Day at Lowe's Shop household must haves for less. Save $80 on the Char Broil Performance Series 4 Burner Grill to Chef up something special. Plus get up to 45% off select major appliances to keep things fresh. Our best lineup is here at Lowe's. Lowe's we help you save valid through 527 while supplies last selection varies by location. See Lowes.com for details.
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Visit your nearby Lowes.
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Date: May 21, 2026
Theme: Unfiltered Student Real Talk: The Vent Line
This episode invites students to call in and air their grievances, big or small, through the special "Student Vent Line." Listeners get an authentic, sometimes hilarious, sometimes heartfelt, peek into the daily dramas, struggles, and triumphs of school life, all set against the backdrop of relatable commentary from The Bert Show hosts.
The "Vault: Students Call The Vent Line" episode is a rollercoaster through the minds and lives of today’s teens. It’s raw, honest, awkward, and endlessly relatable, with The Bert Show crew adding equal parts empathy and laughter. This is a perfect listen for anyone nostalgic for youth—or curious what’s on students’ minds today.