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Host Bert
N the Birch show if you are going. We're looking for somebody very, very specific here and I hope we get just a couple of calls. You are going to Jacksonville this weekend. You're going for the Georgia Florida game.
Co-host Melissa
No, the Florida Georgia game.
Host Bert
As I learned last week, visiting Florida in Florida, it is definitely the Florida Georgia game, but we are here in Georgia. It's a big game. Jacksonville. You know, there's still a whole bunch of people that are pumped up about the game. Seems like it's going to be a little bit one sided this year. So maybe there's not the excitement that there has been in the past.
Co-host Melissa
Bulldog fans are saying, bird, don't, don't say that.
Host Bert
I think if we keep the bar set low, we'll. Right.
Co-host Chris
And you never know in any college football game. That's why college football rocks.
Co-host Melissa
Right?
Host Bert
I mean, and I think we're probably looking for somebody that's really, really hardcore about going this weekend. Like the game could mean something to you, maybe it's not consequential to you, but you're going down there to party your arse off. And that's what this game is really
Co-host Melissa
all about because the game always falls around Halloween weekend. But the fact that the game is on Halloween, you know, that that happens however many years apart. And so people who have been a part of this in the past on Halloween, it's usually a bigger part because everybody's dressed up, everybody's having a good time.
Host Bert
Like you have a history of like severe tailgating so you know you're going to be getting your drink on because what we want to do is we want to do the same thing with you that we did with our intern Reshma a couple of weeks ago.
Co-host Chris
When intern Reshma turned 21, she agreed and had her best friend who was going to help her, agree to call Bert's voicemail once an hour and just leave a message on how the night was going, what was going on, and we got to follow her throughout her 21st birthday and really celebrate with her. And the voicemails were hilarious because it was like you could hear her ramping up on the party, peeking and then coming back down again and going to get food by the end of the night.
Host Bert
Right. We lived the whole night with her.
Co-host Chris
It was a blast.
Host Bert
Through voicemails.
Rakuten Announcer
Right.
Host Bert
So we want to do the same thing with you. If you're going down to Jacksonville. 404-741-Q100. This is what Reshma sounded like by the end of the night.
Caller Erin
Sent at 12:09am.
Caller Chris
She's totally gone right now. And.
Co-host Melissa
Wow.
Host Bert
So we need to find somebody that knows they're going down there. And it's tradition that you're like, by the end of the day, you're barely standing.
Caller Erin
Right.
Co-host Unknown (possibly another host or producer)
It's not tradition. Isn't it a requirement?
Co-host Chris
It is required. It's the world's largest cocktail party.
Caller Erin
Right.
Co-host Unknown (possibly another host or producer)
They don't call it that anymore.
Co-host Chris
Well, it's still that fewer bars, such
Host Bert
a drink of yours, sporting camaraderie.
Co-host Melissa
Sponge.
Co-host Chris
Are there EVPs in here?
Host Bert
So we have to talk to somebody that's serious about partying this weekend. And what we want you to do is call us every hour. Let's see, kickoffs at 3:33, 33:30 in Jacksonville. So generally it goes something like this. You wake up at eight in the morning and you have your first beer, your first drink by nine.
Co-host Melissa
Right.
Host Bert
And you start drinking all the way to kickoff. So what we want you to do is call us every hour on your way approaching kickoff.
Co-host Melissa
Right.
Host Bert
And then you got. I think the fun part is also calling us inside the stadium, too. That's three hours of sobering up right there. If you commit to the sobering up, because you can't have drinks inside the stadium.
Co-host Unknown (possibly another host or producer)
And then you legally.
Co-host Melissa
And then what about. And then after the game? And then after the game, because depending on the outcome, I mean, it doesn't matter what the outcome is, you're still going to party after the game.
Host Bert
Good morning.
Co-host Melissa
I'm a little more excited than the others.
Caller Erin
Hi. How are you?
Host Bert
Good. How are you?
Caller Erin
Good. I just wanted to call and let y' all know that everyone from Georgia right now is heading down to St. Simon's to celebrate Thursday and Friday. And then we all take charter buses down to Jacksonville for the game on Saturday.
Co-host Melissa
Perfect.
Host Bert
Now, is UGA off these next two days also?
Caller Erin
Because wasn't there off on Thursday. I mean, on Friday. I'm sorry, but we're usually off for Thursday and Friday, so we're used to that. So everyone is giving classes.
Rakuten Announcer
It's a break.
Co-host Melissa
It's not for the kids.
Host Bert
It became policy a couple of years ago. So there were so few students that were on campus on Friday before the Florida game that Georgia just gave into it. And they're like, just take Friday.
Co-host Melissa
We do not change what we do on campus. For a football bird. This is an academic decision for the fall.
Caller Erin
No one is going to class today. Everyone is already heading down to St. Simon's to party.
Host Bert
Aaron, I don't know that you would be. This would be great for you as an assignment. You sort of sound like. I mean, we're looking for somebody that is committing to drinking all morning and all afternoon.
Caller Erin
That will not be a problem.
Host Bert
Will not be a problem for you. So you'd have to leave us a voicemail every hour detailing everything that's gone on.
Caller Erin
That would be really fun. I'm sure my friends would love it. We're about to head down right now.
Co-host Unknown (possibly another host or producer)
Erin, I was just gonna say, for some reason, I'm not buying it with her.
Co-host Melissa
Why?
Co-host Unknown (possibly another host or producer)
But also, I wouldn't buy it with Reshma if I just met Reshma that way. And she really gave us some priceless content. Yeah.
Co-host Melissa
I don't think you should judge the book by its voice.
Co-host Unknown (possibly another host or producer)
Whatever.
Co-host Chris
Do you currently have a drunk dialing problem?
Caller Erin
Do I what?
Co-host Chris
Do you currently have a drunk dialing problem?
Caller Erin
That could be a problem, yes.
Co-host Chris
So your friends have at some point said, no, you're not allowed to call him right now.
Caller Erin
Uh huh. And they take away the phone.
Co-host Chris
Okay.
Co-host Melissa
All right, perfect.
Host Bert
And you have to. You have to promise us also that no matter how buzzed you are, you have to place that call once an hour. Cause that's the fun for us.
Caller Erin
Okay. And is this on Thursday and Friday or just Saturday?
Host Bert
Just Saturday, yeah. Just game day.
Co-host Unknown (possibly another host or producer)
Unless you have any, you know, unless you get inspired late tonight or tomorrow night, then you're certainly welcome to call us, of course.
Caller Erin
Okay. Sounds good.
Co-host Melissa
All right.
Co-host Unknown (possibly another host or producer)
Who are we to deny your expression? You're an artist now, right?
Host Bert
Have you had to have a friend hold your hair back while you throw up into a toilet? Anytime over the last three or four weeks.
Caller Erin
Oh, no. I just turned 22 a couple weeks ago.
Co-host Melissa
Perfect. All right.
Host Bert
So not quite 21. A little bit more seasoned, but I think still good.
Co-host Melissa
Just like I'm turned pukin in public.
Caller Chris
Huh?
Co-host Melissa
Nothing. I just say that she's too old to be Pukin at 22.
Host Bert
That is so not true. We can debate that later. All right, Aaron, let me put you on hold, okay?
Caller Erin
Okay, sounds good.
Host Bert
And we'll get the voicemail numbers in your hand and we'll hear your voicemails together on Monday, okay?
Caller Erin
Okay.
Caller Chris
Thanks.
Co-host Chris
Good luck this weekend.
Caller Erin
Thank you. We need it.
Host Bert
Yeah, you will. Now, you are a student at uga, right?
Caller Erin
Yes.
Host Bert
What are you, Junior? Senior.
Caller Erin
I'm a senior.
Host Bert
Okay, hold on one sec. Don't go anywhere.
Caller Erin
Okay.
Host Bert
Somehow I thought a guy would get more into this because guys are more willing to be asked usually.
Co-host Unknown (possibly another host or producer)
But I think the girl calls are better because girls talk. They want to describe. They want to paint a picture. A guy call will be like,
Co-host Chris
That's it.
Rakuten Announcer
Barking.
Co-host Unknown (possibly another host or producer)
Yeah. Just need the girls.
Co-host Chris
Just an English class.
Co-host Melissa
Yes. Obviously.
Host Bert
Chris needs a knee.
Co-host Unknown (possibly another host or producer)
It's got weird and mean here a minute ago.
Host Bert
I think it all started with you ripping on Melissa a couple of weeks ago.
Co-host Melissa
You suck.
Host Bert
Hey, Chris, you think you can do a better job than Erin?
Caller Chris
Yeah. She see the difference between her and I is I'm staying in Jacksonville, less than two miles from the landing. She's staying in St. Simon. Well, St. Simon's is great, but you have to take a bus to get to Jacksonville. I can basically just walk to the Landing and walk to the stadium. The second year last year, we went and we parked in the. We tailgated in the Boy Scout parking down there right next to the stadium. Started at nine in the morning. As soon as they opened the gates to get down there, we started drinking and partying. And really, I don't even remember half the game. I just remember walking back to the car thinking, what the hell just happened? Why did we lose?
Host Bert
You maybe forgot, you know, Then you
Caller Chris
go to the Landing afterwards and you party again.
Co-host Chris
So why not both?
Host Bert
Yeah, we can do both.
Co-host Melissa
I think both. Because I would like to see who's most consistent throughout the day.
Co-host Chris
Yeah.
Co-host Unknown (possibly another host or producer)
Now it's a. Now it's a competition. That's good thinking, Melissa.
Host Bert
Chris, how old. How old are you?
Caller Chris
I'm 27.
Host Bert
Okay, so a little more seasoned than Aaron there.
Caller Chris
A little more seasoned. I'm growing with a group of four. It's my girlfriend who's a senior education major. At Georgia, and I a pharmacist who's a senior at Georgia and another education senior at Georgia. So this is my. This is our second year, and this is their first. So it's kind of going to be like, we know what's going to happen, and they have no freaking clue.
Host Bert
That rookie year that you go to, that initial year experiencing this game, you start off fast, too.
Caller Chris
Oh, yeah. You start off fast because they have a. They have a liquor station every, like, five feet in the. In the landing at the party.
Host Bert
Indeed.
Caller Chris
Like, everywhere you turn, there's literally someone just either handing out or selling liquor.
Host Bert
Now they're trying. They're trying to change that a little bit this year. Trying to tone it down, but, I mean. Yeah, how much can you really tone it down?
Co-host Melissa
University of Florida is trying to get it to where not as many liquor stations are there. There's going to be three times as many police officers on the landing.
Host Bert
Don't be silly. Don't be silly. All right, Chris, let me put you on hold. We'd love to get your voicemails over the weekend.
Caller Chris
No problem.
Host Bert
Okay, hold on one sec. Nice balance right there.
Caller Chris
Yeah.
Host Bert
Got yourself a guy. Got yourself a girl.
Co-host Chris
Yeah. Both UGA fans,
Co-host Unknown (possibly another host or producer)
it's gonna be interesting as the game progresses, if they leave
Co-host Melissa
messages on who's winning and losing.
Host Bert
Well, if George is winning, they're all
Co-host Melissa
gonna be blowing up the phone.
Host Bert
If George is not winning, we may not hear from him for two and a half, three hours. But then I'll tell you what. I mean, we lost so badly last year when I was standing there. You really kick up your drinking hard after that game. So the better voicemails may come in after the game than they. Than they do before the Birch show.
Date: May 8, 2026
Episode Overview
In this lively and comedic episode, the Bert Show crew taps into college football culture by searching for devoted fans traveling to Jacksonville for the annual Georgia-Florida game (or, depending on whom you ask, the Florida-Georgia game). The hosts want wild tailgaters who are willing to chronicle their game-day drinking adventures through hourly voicemails, promising listeners a play-by-play of the ultimate party weekend. The crew reminisces about past on-air antics, recruits enthusiastic listeners, and pokes fun at the entire spectacle surrounding the game.
The episode is all about celebrating the outrageous traditions and party energy of tailgating at one of college football’s biggest rivalries. The Bert Show sets out to find the “wildest” fans, inviting them to document their day of tailgating and drinking via real-time, hourly check-ins. The aim is to embrace and share the rollercoaster of a wild college football weekend—from pre-game excitement to post-game shenanigans.
The Bert Show offers listeners both a hilarious and affectionate look at the unique subculture of college football tailgates, specifically through the lens of the Georgia-Florida game. By leveraging listener participation, the hosts create an authentic, interactive, and entertaining exploration of “party journalism,” promising follow-ups with the most dedicated (and possibly inebriated) fans. If you’re wondering what Saturday morning sounds like for the ultimate college football partier, this episode gives you the answer, voicemail by voicemail.