Vault: They had a stakeout the 9:45am mystery man

Summary

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The Bert Show — Vault: They Had a Stakeout: The 9:45am Mystery Man

Original Air Date: July 2, 2026

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Episode Overview

This episode is a classic "mystery neighbor" deep-dive, blending humor, curiosity, and a little amateur sleuthing. The Bert Show team—Burt, Frankie, and the gang—follow up on listener Whitney's enduring question: Who is the mysterious man arriving at her gated townhome community every morning at 9:45am, entering a specific house for a few minutes, and then leaving? The team recounts their stakeout, interviews with Whitney, and brainstorms theories while enlisting audience help. The tone is playful, collaborative, and delightfully nosy.

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Main Discussion & Key Moments

1. Mystery Introduction & Whitney’s Report

(01:30–02:19)

• Burt recaps how Whitney called in last week about a strange man she sees every day at 9:45am in her gated community.
• Whitney describes:
  • The man arrives daily, checks his surroundings, enters a unit for 4–5 minutes, and leaves.
  • Sometimes brings something from his trunk or back seat.
  • His behavior seems sneaky and makes her uneasy.

Quote (Whitney, 01:50):
"He's also looking around to see if anyone's looking at him and then he goes in the townhome. He goes in for about four or five minutes and comes back out, goes to his car, and then drives away."

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2. Stakeout Setup & Frankie’s Involvement

(02:26–03:39)

• The team discusses previous attempts to confront the man.
• Promotions team member Frankie volunteers for a stakeout, expressing both curiosity and excitement.
• Frankie brings his sister along. Playful banter ensues about camouflage and stakeout movies.

Quote (Frankie, 03:37):
"I'm just nosy."

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3. Stakeout Recap & Investigation

(04:31–06:44)

• Frankie and his sister conduct the stakeout Thursday night.
  • They hide near the house, check for the man’s car, see a TV on through the window, but otherwise no activity.
  • Frankie does background research and finds the house’s real estate agent (who is also the owner) via the FMLS.
• Suspicion arises as the man never mentions the house is for sale despite being asked, even though it’s an active listing.

Quote (Frankie, 05:39):
"I went and looked up on the FMLS website and found out who the real estate agent lady was."
Quote (Frankie, 06:30):
"What really bothers me the most is the guy never said anything to me about, oh yeah, well, this house is for sale and it is an active listing."

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4. Real Estate Theories & Listeners Weigh In

(07:48–12:21)

• Debate about why someone would keep a listing active but not seem to sell.
• Listeners call in to offer ideas:
  • Brandi (10:18): Her husband provides private security for real estate agents; such people will not tell strangers if a house is for sale for security reasons.
  • Kimberly (11:28): Real estate agent perspective: Owner/agent may keep property on the market to avoid foreclosure or facilitate a short sale, often at the bank's request.

Quote (Brandi, 10:22):
"He will not tell a stranger walking up that a house is for sale because he doesn't want it to be a target when he can't check it during the night."
Quote (Kimberly, 11:28):
"She might be on the brink of potentially losing the property. She might be in pre foreclosure or foreclosure… To make a deal on the house, [the bank] requires it be on the market."

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5. What’s Next? Calling the Real Estate Agent

(12:42–13:46)

• The hosts agree the only way forward is for Frankie to call the real estate agent/owner and ask about the man’s identity and reason for visiting.
• Frankie has the contact info ready, jokingly calling his resources the "bedcave" database.
• They suggest he be honest but discreet with the agent.

Quote (Burt, 13:24):
"He can just say, I have a friend of mine who lives in the neighborhood, and there's a guy who approaches that house every day for five minutes. We just want to make sure that you are aware of this person."

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6. Whitney’s Real-Time Update

(14:04–14:59)

• Whitney jumps in with live information: the man is currently doing his mysterious daily visit as she speaks.
• Whitney notes that she caught the man parking in a different driveway elsewhere in the complex, suggesting he might be connected to another unit. She spotted him using an alternate exit.

Quote (Whitney, 14:13):
"On Friday, I had to go to a doctor's appointment… and his car was parked in a driveway over there. All weekend, I kind of saw him in and out of that driveway. So I don't know if he really does live here and he's doing something over there otherwise."

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7. Comic Relief: Frankie’s Love Life

(15:27–15:46)

• Light-hearted close as they remember a listener was interested in Frankie after the last episode.
• Frankie is self-deprecating about being recognized for his stakeout efforts.

Quote (Frankie, 15:45):
"Hey, you wanna go on a stakeout? Yeah, I promise I love you, but I won't stalk you the way I stalk Whitney's neighbor."

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Frankie on motivation (03:37): "I'm just nosy."
• Burt on their obsession (07:48): "What worries me is how interested we all are in this story about people we don't know."
• Brandi on security (10:22): "He will not tell a stranger walking up that a house is for sale because he doesn't want it to be a target when he can't check it during the night."
• Kimberly on foreclosure (11:28): "She might be in pre foreclosure…to make a deal...the banks require the house be on the market for a relatively short period."
• Frankie’s playful take (15:45): "Yeah, I promise I love you, but I won't stalk you the way I stalk Whitney's neighbor."

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Key Segment Timestamps

• 01:30: Burt recaps the origin of the “9:45am man” mystery.
• 01:50: Whitney describes the man’s routine.
• 03:01: Frankie explains his initial encounter with the man.
• 04:31: Frankie recounts the stakeout.
• 05:39: Frankie investigates property details via FMLS.
• 10:18: Listener Brandi shares private security insights.
• 11:28: Real estate agent Kimberly provides foreclosure/short sale rationale.
• 13:06: Hosts plan for Frankie to call the agent.
• 14:13: Whitney gives a live update—man is on the move.
• 15:27: Closing comic relief about Frankie’s love life.

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Tone & Style

• Original language and tone: Conversational, witty, playful curiosity, and group troubleshooting.
• Atmosphere: Relatable mix of communal nosiness and friendly ribbing.

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Summary for New Listeners

This episode combines community sleuthing with the comedic chemistry of The Bert Show crew—nothing violent or sinister, just suburban mystery and a lot of laughs. The core intrigue: why does an unknown man visit the same unit for minutes each day? The cast and listeners explore sensible, suspicious, and silly theories, leaning heavily on real-world expertise live on air. The drama ends on a cliffhanger, with Frankie set to make the pivotal call to the real estate agent—the truth is just one phone call away.

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Transcript

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[Burt]

The Burt show the most probably asked about thing this started when Burt was here like middle of last week. Monday of last week. We started off talking to Whitney and this is Whitney's very first time she's on with us talking about a guy who comes to her townhome community every day.

[Whitney]

First of all, I live in a gated townhome community and he comes in about 9:45 every day and he pretty much gets out of his car. Sometimes he'll grab something out of the trunk or the back seat when he's walking down there. He's also looking around to see if anyone's looking at him and then he goes in the townhome he goes in for about four or five minutes and comes back out, goes to his car, and then drives away.

[Burt]

So that was Whitney's very first time with us. And Whitney joins us again. Hey, Whitney, how are you?

[Whitney]

Hi.

[Radio Host 2]

Good.

[Whitney]

How are you?

[Burt]

We're good.

[Caller/Listener]

The. Okay.

[Radio Host 3]

Adjusting the voice disguiser.

[Burt]

Adjusting the voice disguiser so you remain anonymous. So we talked to Whitney a few times, and we actually watched the guy, after we talked about her, pull up while she was on us. And then he made a U turn and left, which is something she had never noticed before. So we thought he was onto us. Then we realized we had to send somebody out there, of course.

[Radio Host 3]

And who else to send out?

[Radio Host 1]

Frankie.

[Burt]

Frankie from our promotions department. He said he'd be all over it. So Frankie went out and hung out with Whitney one morning and actually had interaction with the guy.

[Frankie]

So he pulled in at 9:45 on the dot. You know, I asked him, I was like, excuse me, do you live here? And he said, yes. He said he lives in the neighborhood. And I was like, I was wondering if, you know, if there are any townhomes here for sale? And he said, yeah, I think so. But he wasn't sure which ones were vacant or not. He was kind of span buffish and kind of shady about the whole thing. And after he left, I walked by the house that he walks into, and there is a real estate lockbox on the front door.

[Burt]

So the mystery deepens.

[Radio Host 3]

Yes.

[Burt]

And Frankie, being the generous guy that he is, offered to stage a stakeout.

[Frankie]

I'm just nosy.

[Radio Host 3]

This just gives you a reason. You do this all the time.

[Burt]

Well, this is gonna be his stalking with a reason. Cause we need to know for. I'm just curious. So he coordinated with Whitney. And who'd you get? Your sister or somebody to help you?

[Frankie]

Yeah, my sister.

[Caller/Listener]

Really?

Nice.

[Burt]

It's a family affair. This creepin'.

[Frankie]

I thought it was fun.

[Caller/Listener]

So did you do the camouflage thing? Paint under your eyes?

[Frankie]

Well, I watched spy games before I went.

[Caller/Listener]

Fair enough.

[Frankie]

Just to brush up.

[Burt]

At any point, did you have to urinate into a bottle in your car?

[Frankie]

No, but I did.

[Caller/Listener]

Just for fun.

[Burt]

So, Whitney, have you gotten an update from Frankie yet since the stakeout, or are you gonna be hearing it for the first time with us?

[Whitney]

I'll be hearing it for the first time.

[Burt]

Okay.

[Radio Host 3]

Okay.

[Burt]

So, Frank, you actually did the stakeout Thursday into Friday, right?

[Frankie]

Yes.

[Burt]

All right. Frankie was sneaky about it because he was trying to save a treat for Burt coming back, but we don't know if that's Ever going to happen now. All right, Frankie, tell us what happened.

[Frankie]

All right, so we went in and we hid behind the wall.

[Burt]

Are you in a car or.

[Frankie]

Well, we got out of the car to walk around to see if we saw his car.

[Burt]

Okay.

[Frankie]

We didn't. We didn't see his car at all.

[Radio Host 3]

Did you dress all in black and like shimmy down the wall?

[Frankie]

I didn't want to be that covert about it because then the other neighbors looking out the window would be like, what is this?

[Advertiser Voice]

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[Burt]

911.

[Frankie]

Yeah. So we looked at the house and there was a TV on.

[Burt]

Now what time are you there?

[Frankie]

This is around 9 o'.

[Burt]

Clock a.m. or p.m. no, it's p.m.

[Radio Host 3]

thursday night at 9.

[Frankie]

Yeah, just check them out. And there was no.

[Burt]

Now, we don't know your sister. Were you using her as bait? Like, is she hot?

[Frankie]

She just wanted to come along. We talked about it because it bothered me that I couldn't figure out who this guy was.

[Radio Host 1]

All right?

[Frankie]

So I talked to a bunch of people about what they thought and I got all types of different stories like he's a murderer or blah, blah, blah, blah. But so we went. There was a TV on.

[Burt]

Get your sister to join you for that.

[Frankie]

Yeah, well, she wanted to. So that was the sick part. So there was a TV on all night and that was it. No movement? Nothing.

[Radio Host 3]

You didn't see anybody in the.

[Frankie]

Not at all. So, you know, I got really frustrated and went and got the address and because I'm connected, I went and looked up on the FMLS website and found out who the real estate agent lady was.

[Caller/Listener]

What is the fmls?

[Frankie]

It's multi listing real estate.

[Burt]

It's like if you're going to buy a house and you can tell your real estate agent, I want to buy a house that costs $100,000 that's in the zip code. And then they can type that information in and it shows you every one of the houses. Here's 10 houses to choose from.

[Frankie]

Yeah. And it gives you the active listing, all the information about real estate agents, everything like that. So did that and got her number and found out that she is the owner. And what really bothers me the most is the guy never said anything to me about, oh yeah, well, this house is for sale and it is an active listing.

[Burt]

But he said you asked him specifically, are there any houses for sale?

[Frankie]

And he didn't bring. He didn't say anything about, oh, I'm a real estate agent, or he did not say, well, this house is for sale. Nothing like that. He totally just walked away from all of that.

[Burt]

So now, have you spoken with the real estate agent?

[Frankie]

No, I wanted to wait to talk to you guys first before I called the real estate agent.

[Radio Host 3]

Yes. Because I. You know, if it's an active listing, it should be an empty house. Unless. Well, I guess, no, if it's for sale, the person could still live there. So why.

[Frankie]

Why wouldn't he. Why wouldn't he say, my wife or. Yes, this one is for sale or something like that. When the owner is a woman and the real estate. The real estate agent is the owner and she's actively selling it because he has a key.

[Radio Host 3]

So the real estate agent is the owner. And because I'm curious who lives there, because if a TV's on, somebody was inside that house.

[Burt]

Well, that could be a timer thing, too, right? Like security.

[Frankie]

It could be. Or it could be that he turned. Maybe he goes in and turns the TV on at night to prevent people from breaking in and then shows up every morning to shut it off.

[Radio Host 3]

Maybe.

[Frankie]

It could be something like that.

[Radio Host 3]

It'd be innocent like that.

[Caller/Listener]

But if he didn't mention that the house was for sale, he would know that if he had to go in there and turn off the tv. But what worries me is that he has a key and we don't know who this guy is, but is coming in.

[Burt]

What worries me is how interested we all are in this story about people we don't know.

[Radio Host 3]

I know, I know. We're just curious. See? See how it works?

[Burt]

Look what you've done to us, Whitney.

[Radio Host 3]

Have you ever seen anybody come in and out of that house that you've noticed? Because I know you don't sit and stare out your window all the time, but I'm just, you know, when you've been outside or whatever, have you ever noticed anybody coming in out of the house later in the day?

[Whitney]

No, I haven't.

[Burt]

Okay, so now then, here's the two questions. One, I think we would need to have. I would like to hear from, like, a real estate professional. Like, is there any reason.

[Radio Host 3]

Are you the one that owns that house, right?

[Burt]

Or anybody? I'm wondering, is there any reason that a realtor who would own a property would own it and have it listed, but not be actively selling it? Like, maybe is there a tax break? Like, what if she bought it, like, as an investment property, but doesn't want to sell it till the market changes, but has to keep it listed so it's an investment?

[Radio Host 3]

Frankie, did you see on the site, was it an active listing.

[Frankie]

It was an active listing.

[Radio Host 3]

It was an active listing.

[Burt]

That's what I'm saying. Like, keeping it as an active listing, but intentionally.

[Radio Host 3]

In this market, every realtor, I'm sure, is dying to sell homes.

[Burt]

Not if she bought it for 150,000 and can only get 90,000 for it.

[Frankie]

Right now, the listing for it is probably double that. Actually.

[Burt]

That's like, oh, 320.

[Whitney]

It was. I mean, it wasn't on the market for very long.

[Frankie]

They.

[Whitney]

I mean, these homes go very quickly, and I don't know if now, because the economy, it's been. But they don't go for sale for very long. A lot of people are really interested in them.

[Burt]

Now that we know what kind of neighborhood you live in. Whitney, it's $100 every time you're on the air with us.

[Radio Host 3]

Retro.

[Radio Host 1]

Yes.

[Burt]

Hey, Nene, welcome to the Bird Show.

[Caller/Listener]

Hey, guys.

[Radio Host 2]

I was just gonna say, maybe the guy's renting and he doesn't want it to sell, because if it sells, then he's gonna have to move out.

[Caller/Listener]

Okay, that's a good point.

[Frankie]

If he's renting for five minutes. Yeah. He only shows up every morning for five minutes. Why. Why would you rent that?

[Radio Host 2]

Oh, I caught at the end, so I didn't know he was only there for five minutes a day, so I don't know. Okay, scratch that then.

[Whitney]

Sorry.

[Burt]

Listen to Frankie scaring our listeners.

[Radio Host 3]

I know Frankie. Don't be so mean.

[Frankie]

Look, I put a lot of time into this.

[Burt]

Hey, Brandy. Welcome to the Bird Show.

[Radio Host 2]

Hi.

[Burt]

What's going on?

[Caller/Listener]

I was just calling because my husband

[Radio Host 2]

does private security for real estate agents every once in a while.

[Burt]

Okay.

[Radio Host 2]

And he will not tell a stranger walking up that a house is for sale because he doesn't want it to be a target when he can't check it during the night.

[Frankie]

Well, is he kind of creepy, gray hair and drive a BMW? This might be our answer.

[Caller/Listener]

No, that's not my husband, but there

[Radio Host 2]

might be another one out there.

[Burt]

Well, talk to us about security for real estate. So, like, if I have a house listed that I can't visit on a regular basis, I can hire someone to check on it every day.

[Radio Host 2]

Yes, you can hire them to come out. They change the locks, or they check all the locks, and then they'll come in, do a walk through, and they usually have about 20 properties they do a day.

[Radio Host 3]

I bet that's what this dude does. But why would he. But the kink is, why would he park away from it?

[Radio Host 2]

Because he doesn't Want it to be a target. So, I mean, since people that he's not living there and that the back door is possibly unlocked or easier to access. I mean, he doesn't want anyone coming through when he's not there to check it.

[Radio Host 3]

So he would park away from a property and walk to it.

[Radio Host 2]

Yes.

[Burt]

Okay, Makes sense. Okay, thank you for the insight, Brandi. Hey, Kimberly, welcome to the show.

[Caller/Listener]

Hello.

[Radio Host 2]

How are you?

[Burt]

We're great. How are you?

[Radio Host 2]

Great.

[Caller/Listener]

I'm also a real estate agent, and one of the reasons why the property could potentially be on the market for sale is if she is a real estate agent, she might be on the brink of potentially losing the property. She might be in pre foreclosure or foreclosure. In order for her to make a deal on the house. For example, a short sale, which would protect her, she still has to sell the home, but she can sell it at a much lower price than what the house is worth. A lot of times the banks require that the house be on the market for a relatively short period of time.

[Burt]

So she's trying to keep the house on the market for long enough that the bank is satisfied, but not sell it. So she can get the bank to

[Caller/Listener]

cover her mortgage or find someone else who can short sell it, which would be purchase the house at a much lower price and what the house is worth.

[Burt]

Okay.

[Caller/Listener]

The bank will require that it be on the market so that any potential buyer could buy the house. But the key is as a real estate agent and she's the owner. It's still up to her as an owner to determine if she wants to sell it to person A or person B or person C who might be her family.

[Burt]

Okay, so here's the. Here's the question. And Whitney, I think we'll all weigh in on this, but you can. I think you can have the ultimate say. I think the natural next thing to do is for investigator Frankie to place a phone call to the real estate agent, slash, owner. Because you would have contact information. Right. From the. From your secret database, your CIA database.

[Frankie]

I do have. Well, I have it in my phone just in case you guys wanted it

[Radio Host 3]

that he got out of the bedcave.

[Burt]

So maybe Frankie just places a call to her and. And is completely honest.

[Radio Host 3]

Yeah.

[Burt]

Says, look, here's. Here's the deal. I'm calling because a neighbor has not.

[Radio Host 3]

Talk about stalking the property. I would probably leave that out of the comfort.

[Burt]

No, but I mean, I don't even. I don't even know if the whole radio thing totally needs to come Up. He can just say, I have a friend of mine who lives in the. In the neighborhood, and there's a guy who approaches that house every day for five minutes. We just want to make sure that you are aware of this person.

[Radio Host 3]

Right.

[Burt]

And know what he's doing.

[Radio Host 3]

And then she can confirm, you know, that if he's the security guy.

[Burt]

Whitney.

[Whitney]

Yes.

[Burt]

You like that?

[Caller/Listener]

I think that's good.

[Whitney]

I have a. A little more information to let you guys know also.

[Frankie]

The end.

[Radio Host 3]

I'm glad you say that.

[Whitney]

Till the end, I'm gonna let you guys get done with everything and.

[Burt]

All right. What do you got, Whitney?

[Radio Host 3]

She didn't want to be rude.

[Whitney]

I mean, like, he didn't come on Friday. He just pulled up right now. He's going down there.

[Radio Host 3]

Was it 9:46? He's on time.

[Whitney]

I was gonna let you know on Friday, I had to go to a doctor's appointment. And I went out the other exit that normally don't go out, and his car was parked in a driveway over there. And so I called you guys on Friday and kind of, like, was gonna just let you know and stuff. And then all weekend, I kind of saw him in and out of that driveway. So I don't know if he really does live here and he's doing something over there otherwise.

[Burt]

You saw him in a driveway of another townhome in the same community?

[Whitney]

Yes. He was parked. It was, like, across. In the unit of townhomes across the street from the ones that he goes into.

[Radio Host 3]

But that's. Is that. That's different than where he pulls in, like, at 9:40, like, right now, everyone

[Caller/Listener]

the total opposite side.

[Radio Host 3]

I still think that's odd.

[Burt]

We got a call.

[Whitney]

It makes me wonder if he, like, leaves the driveway that he's parked in, comes over here and parks and goes down.

[Radio Host 3]

Well, again, he may do that if he's a security guy and he's having to, you know. But we'll see. We'll see when Frankie calls. Frankie makes the call.

[Burt]

All right, Frankie, that is your. That is your mission. All right, the saga continues.

[Radio Host 3]

Let me ask one question. Did we ever get. Remember that caller that was a little attracted to Frankie?

[Frankie]

Oh, God.

[Radio Host 3]

When we first talked.

[Burt]

Oh, yeah. If you're interested in Frankie, you can go ahead and send us an email.

[Radio Host 3]

We never hooked you up with.

[Frankie]

So weird.

[Radio Host 3]

Hooked you up with her?

[Frankie]

No.

[Caller/Listener]

Okay.

[Frankie]

Sent me a number, but what am I gonna do, really? Hey, saw me on the radio.

[Radio Host 1]

Hey, my name's Brad.

[Radio Host 3]

Frankie.

[Frankie]

Hey, you wanna go on a stakeout?

[Burt]

Yeah, I promise I love you, but I won't stalk you the way I stalk Whitney's neighbor. All right, Whitney, we'll check in with you tomorrow after Frankie makes the call.

[Radio Host 1]

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[Frankie]

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