Vault: This listener accidentally outted himself on-air

Summary

The Bert Show – Vault: This Listener Accidentally Outted Himself On-Air

Release Date: July 22, 2026
Main Theme:
This episode centers on Serge, a listener who unintentionally outed himself as gay on a previous episode of The Bert Show while defending another listener, Carl. The hosts follow up with Serge to discuss the aftermath at his workplace, the emotional fallout, and broader issues surrounding coming out—especially in professional and community contexts.

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Episode Breakdown

1. Background: The On-Air Outing (01:01 – 01:47)

• Context:
  • The show recounts a segment from Friday in which Carl was uncomfortable participating in a public, staged same-sex proposal bit.
  • Serge called in to weigh in, passionately defending Carl and, in doing so, publicly revealed his own sexuality—something he hadn’t previously shared on such a public scale.

2. Serge Reflects: Immediate Repercussions (01:47 – 04:49)

• Serge’s Weekend Aftermath:
  • “I am. I've taken off work today because Friday was pretty interesting.” (Serge, 01:51)
  • Serge explains he’d largely kept his romantic life private at work—especially any relationships with men.
  • “For the gay women, men and women at work, I'm pretty much gay. For those that know, and for the straight population, they assume I'm straight. So I was sort of under stealth mode.” (Serge, 03:46)
  • After the show aired, multiple colleagues approached Serge at work, expressing support and admiration for his “courage.”
  • He admits the outing was “sort of impulsive”: “I forgot there was a voice disguiser... I wanted to be honest on the radio because I was coming at you guys in defense of Carl.” (Serge, 04:38)

3. Emotional Impact and Workplace Responses (04:49 – 07:39)

• Subconscious Motivation:
  • Radio Host 2 suggests: “There has to be something subconscious in you that wanted to set this in motion.”
  • Serge agrees, acknowledging that 2010 has been “a year of change” for him. (Serge, 04:55)
• Serge’s Workday:
  • Positive responses from some coworkers, including high-level management, who say: “They wanted the whole Serge, not just one person...” (Serge, 06:40)
  • Feeling “freaked out” by how quickly the news of his sexuality spread:
    • “Once you... it leaves your lips, it just goes.” (Serge, 07:17)
• Taking a Day Off:
  • Serge skips work to regain a sense of control after feeling overwhelmed by these events.
  • “I'm simultaneously, like, a very private person and an open book at the same time.” (Serge, 06:44)
  • Host 2 empathizes, noting: “By not going to work today, you're able to control a situation that you felt like was out of control on Friday.” (Radio Host 2, 07:26)

4. Community Response and Racial Dynamics (07:39 – 09:13)

• Support Not Equally Distributed:
  • Serge observes that all immediate displays of support at work came from white colleagues.
  • “All the people that came to be supportive were all white... people that I used to talk to every morning that are black just walked by.” (Serge, 08:07)
• Hosts Weigh In:
  • There’s recognition among hosts that cultural and community differences affect openness and supportiveness around LGBTQ issues.
  • “I understand that the black community is not as open-minded as the white community. And I challenged Friday that that needs to change, and it shouldn't just be okay.” (Radio Host 1, 09:13)

5. Final Thoughts: Encouragement and Perspective (09:13 – 10:09)

• Host Support:
  • Hosts remind Serge that many people don’t have the support he experienced and encourage him to focus on the affirming responses.
  • “Be proud of yourself, and the firm's behind you and you're not gonna lose your job. And it's not a hostile work environment.” (Radio Host 1, 09:46)
• Serge’s Gratitude:
  • “I appreciate you giving me the forum. Thanks a lot.” (Serge, 10:03)
• Hosts Congratulate Serge:
  • “Congratulations. It's a good thing. It's not a bad thing.” (Radio Host 1, 10:06)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On accidental outing:
  • “I forgot that there was a voice disguiser that I could... I wanted to be honest on the radio because I was kind of coming at you guys in defense of Carl.” (Serge, 04:38)
• On the aftermath:
  • “Once you... it leaves your lips, it just goes.” (Serge, 07:17)
• On support:
  • “Fifteen minutes after I arrived at work, the first person stopped by to tell me how courageous I was... to assure that the firm was behind me.” (Serge, 03:56)
• On racial dynamics:
  • “All the people that came to be supportive were all white... people that I used to talk to every morning that are black just walked by...” (Serge, 08:07)
• Hosts’ encouragement:
  • “Be proud of yourself, and the firm's behind you... Don't waste your energy worrying about the guy passed by you that didn't look at you.” (Radio Host 1, 09:46)

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Important Timestamps

• 01:15: Setup of the original bit leading to Serge’s call and outing
• 03:46: Serge describes navigating his sexuality at work
• 04:38–05:02: Serge reflects on impulsivity and “subconscious” motivations for coming out
• 06:40–07:26: Serge’s emotional response to public knowledge and support from management
• 08:07: Discussion of racial differences in workplace support
• 09:46–10:06: Host encouragement and wrap-up

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Tone & Language

The episode features candid, empathetic, and sometimes humorous exchanges. The tone is supportive, especially from the hosts, who provide perspective and encouragement, while Serge is honest about anxiety, regret, and gratitude.

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Summary

This episode thoughtfully unpacks the complexities of coming out—intentionally or not—in a professional environment, issues of privacy versus openness, and how cultural and workplace differences shape these experiences. With Serge’s story at the center, the show fosters an empathetic, real-life discussion about authenticity, support, and the enduring importance of community and allyship.

Transcript

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[Carl]

The Bird show Here is Serge. So we get into this heated conversation on Friday with. With Carl, and I think the center of it was. What was the center? I mean, I don't want to say.

[Radio Host 1]

There was a bit in which we were going to have two guys go out into a public place and one was going to propose to the other to see the public's reaction to it. And Carl was initially approached to do this for us, and Carl refused because he said he made it. It made him uncomfortable. So. So we confronted him on the air Friday about that.

[Carl]

So Serge called up at that point and he started. He had a very strong opinion about it and added himself on the radio. He's like this. First time I've ever talked about this, and here it is publicly. So we wanted to check in with him today to see if any family heard it, friends heard it, co workers, and what's been going on. Hey, Serge.

[Serge]

Hey, how are you? How you doing?

[Radio Host 2]

Good.

[Serge]

I am. I've taken off work today because Friday was pretty interesting.

[Radio Host 1]

What happened?

[Serge]

Well, I'm not going to say the experience was bad. It was outside of my comfort zone, I'll tell you that. I've been pretty much sleepless all weekend because, you know, I've been working at the same place for last five years. And prior to this, if I talked about relationships with other co workers, it was in terms of the past because I haven't been in a relationship since 2004, and my last long term was with the woman. And whenever I talked about that relationship, it was like in a conversation about relationships with someone who was experiencing some challenges in a relationship. Of their own. And normally it was about the Dynamics of Men vs Women. And I want to make it clear that prior to Friday, I never really talked about any romantic relationships with men, except with one or two gay co workers that kind of were respectful of me not wanting to talk about it. And with them. I never really talked much about the relationships with women. I've had about three long term with women and two with men. And I've been pretty much dating men exclusively since that last relationship with a woman. So for the gay women, men and women at work, I'm pretty much gay. For those that know, and for the straight population, they assume I'm straight. So I was sort of under stealth mode. So that said, here's what happened. My work area is sort of at a service window, so I pretty much see everyone coming and going on a floor. And I'm kind of known throughout the office since I've been there for a while. And 15 minutes after I arrived from work, at work, the first person stopped by to tell me how courageous I was about talking about the situation. And she really appreciated getting to hear what I had to say and to assure that the firm was behind me. I was kind of surprised, even though I knew it was coming, because I know talking about on the radio kind of gives open license for people to just talk about it in general, But I certainly don't have the personality that allows me to go up to a coworker to address something like that about that sort of thing, even if it's to comfort them or something, you know, so that. That opened up and I was sort of really uncomfortable talking about it at work. But it was fine. I mean, we. I said I knew what was coming after I did it, Even though I told her it wasn't courageous, it was sort of impulsive. You know, I forgot that there was a voice disguiser that I could. I could. I could go behind and I forgot to change my name. But at the same time, I wanted to be honest on the radio because I was kind of coming at you guys in defense of Carl. So I wanted to make sure I was completely out there if I was going to call anything into question.

[Radio Host 2]

And there has to be something subconscious in you that wanted to set this in motion.

[Serge]

Yeah.

[McDonald's Announcer]

Although I'm not, I believe.

[Serge]

Yeah, yeah. No, I admit that. I admit that it's been a year of change for me. 2010. So I guess this is part of it, too.

[Radio Host 2]

Good for you.

[Radio Host 1]

Why did you take today off? I'm curious. Because her comments were very supportive.

[Serge]

Well, here's what was coming.

[Radio Host 1]

Okay.

[Serge]

The next thing was that one of the gay co workers that I spoke with came up and was really making a big deal about the whole thing because I had actually posted what was going on on Facebook, and it's a closed Facebook, but I have, like, a co worker filter there. And he got to see it, and he came up, and it wasn't necessarily not supportive, but it was sort of like he was really making like a. You know, you should have been out more or. Not that he said those things, but he was really trying to be flamboyant in front of my desk, you know, and he was. He. It start. There's my boss sitting in a. Who doesn't know yet.

[Carl]

I can't quite pinpoint exactly what.

[Radio Host 1]

What he did.

[Carl]

Yeah, what he did.

[Serge]

Okay, Define him being flamboyant, gay, gay. You know, point. He was pointing his finger, literally saying, gay, gay, gay. I like teasing you. Yeah, he was teasing me. And, I mean, we sort of have that kind of relationship. But I hadn't told my boss yet what was going on, and he was doing it in front of my boss's office. So I felt like the choice of being able to talk about it was getting taken out of hand.

[Carl]

So why the decision to take the day off then? Like, because you're not there today, probably more people are gonna talk about it in the office than if you were there.

[Serge]

Right? Well, that's true. But you see, I'm simultaneously, like, a very private person and an open book at the same time. I mean, I realized that I had talked about. I went in. I worked through my day. I had several people stop by. I also had, like, a big wig by to tell me that the. The business was behind me and they wanted the whole surge, not just one person, you know, there. But then I started really freaking out about the information being so free. You know, it was. It was something that I did on impulse and that I was. Evidently, I was ready to talk about it, but I. Once you. It leaves your lips, it just goes.

[Radio Host 2]

And then it's out there, and then it just goes. And it gets moving and it's in motion, and it seems like you weren't really ready for it to be in motion. So by not going to work today, you're able to control a situation that you felt like was out of control on Friday.

[Radio Host 1]

But I've got to say, for people who get fired from work from being gay, I just want to put it in perspective that you are lucky to be at this office because you had more than one person come to you and say, the firm is behind you. And so I do think that all this insecurity is coming from within you. It's not a hostile work environment. And so many gay people would love to be in a situation in a conservative environment where somebody walks up to them and said, just want to let you know the firm is behind you. So you're very lucky.

[Serge]

Well, here's the interesting thing. You remember when we were talking about the issue of the black community and homosexuality, all of the people that came to be supportive were all black. Were all white. I'm sorry, they were all white. There were people that I used to talk to every morning that are black that just walked by, except there was just one person who said hello. And then that was it.

[Carl]

Yeah, Carl and I had that conversation outside the office or outside the studio on Friday about this very thing too. Yeah, it's just. Yeah, it's very, very different. It's very, very different. And that's why his attitude was. He didn't want to get involved in it whatsoever.

[Serge]

And know. And they. I felt, granted, they may not all have listened to it and maybe I was hyper aware of being conscious of something, some hostility, but it was really strange. There. There's one, only one other person came to talk that I went to, to talk to about it, and she was supportive. But all the other, it was like a ratio of 1 to like 10.

[Radio Host 1]

Well, it's like, I mean, I reiterate that your insecurity is coming from within you. And I understand that the black community is not as open minded as the white community. And I challenged Friday that that needs to change and it shouldn't just be okay. But also, I think that, you know, people wear different style of clothing and people don't pay attention to them. You know, like, there's so many things that you can be insecure about. And if you're not insecure, you put your energy toward the people that are supportive of you and it ends up being more white people. Then be supportive of the white people. You know, don't waste your energy worrying about the guy passed by you that didn't look at you, because, I mean, be proud of yourself and the firm's behind you and you're not gonna lose your job. And it's not a hostile work environment. Just a couple people didn't say hi. So I think that. Yeah, I don't understand why you're backing out of work today.

[Carl]

Hey, Serge, we gotta run here, man. But thank you for sharing everything with us. Appreciate it.

[Radio Host 1]

Congratulations.

[Serge]

I appreciate you giving me the forum. Thanks a lot.

[Radio Host 1]

It's a good thing. Congratulations. It's a good thing. It's not a bad thing.

[Ryan Seacrest]

The Burt show

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[Serge]

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[Serge]

Refreshers contain caffeine.