The Bert Show – "Vault: Time Killing Websites"

Date: November 11, 2025
Podcast: The Bert Show (Pionaire Podcasting)
Cast: Bert, Kristin, Abby, Cassie, Tommy, and others
Main Theme:
A lively and nostalgic dive into the online rabbit holes and digital distractions that help listeners “kill time” at work or during their downtime, featuring the cast's own confessions, listener calls with their favorite time-wasting websites, and playful banter about guilty pleasures.

1. Episode Overview

Purpose:
This episode explores the endlessly entertaining world of time-killing websites—sites you sneak onto while at work, at home, or whenever you need a break from the monotony of daily life. The cast swaps stories about their favorite distractions, listeners call in with their guilty pleasures, and everyone shares a laugh over shared digital nostalgia.

2. Key Discussion Points & Insights

A. Workplace Time-Wasting: Universal Confessions

• Dual-Window Masters: The cast opens up about spending as much time on games and fun sites as on actual work—especially when working behind a computer.
  • “If you're at work and you're working behind a computer, my guess is 50% of your day is spent on work. 50% is playing solitaire, kicking a soccer ball straight up in the air, playing golf, whatever.” (B, 01:03)
• Quick-Switch Tools: They discuss programs (panic buttons, hotkey overlays) that make it look like you’re busy when the boss comes around.
  • “It runs, like, underneath whatever you’re doing. And if your boss looks up, you just hit F1… it goes to some screen that makes it look like whatever it is you work on at your office.” (A, 01:29)

B. The Classics: Addictive Online Games

• Solitaire, Collapse, and Bubble Wrap:
  • Reminiscing about “Collapse,” “virtual bubble wrap” popping, and that “wadded paper into the garbage can” game that you just can’t stop.
    • “There was one that was so addictive... these colored blocks… hours, I would play that for hours.” (C, 02:22)
    • “Have you ever been to the site where it’s just like bubble wrap and you just put your cursor over and it—” (B, 02:36)
• Parental Tech Support Confessions:
  • Bert confesses to spending hours playing while ostensibly helping his parents fix their computer.
    • “I end up popping red balloons for two and a half hours, not even on my own computer.” (A, 03:17)

C. Listener Favorites: Quirky Distractions

(Listener segments include both call-in and in-studio playful reactions)

• OddTodd.com (Cartoons and Stories)
  • “He just does, you know, cartoons and stories and he gets people to write in their interesting stories. It’s actually good stuff.” (D, 03:46)
• Sudoku.com (Classic Numbers Puzzles)
  • Confessions of buying beginner Sudoku books and feeling left out for not knowing comic-page puzzles.
• GwinnettCountySheriff.com (Public Mugshots)
  • Listener shares the guilty pleasure of browsing new mugshots:
    • “It has your charges, your bond, your address, your mugshot.” (D, 05:23)
  • The cast gamifies it: guessing crimes based solely on mugshot photos and names, adding a lighthearted but edgy twist.
• KillSomeTime.com (Funny/Stupid Videos)
  • “It’s videos from people doing funny stuff to being absolutely, totally stupid… But it’s addicting, though.” (D, 08:09)
• UglyDresses.com (Cringe-worthy Wedding/Prom Dresses)
  • “There are pictures of horrific weddings… a prom dress with her belly cut out. They are horrific. Hours of fun.” (D, 08:37)
• WeddingBettin.com (Rate How Long Couples Will Last)
  • Bert introduces “weddingbedding.com” where users rate how long a couple’s marriage will last, based on their photos.
    • “You vote on five different choices… After you vote, the average score comes up. In this case, this couple got 4.5 years and 75% of people voted they’ll get divorced.” (B, 09:53)

D. Deep Dives and Obscure Pleasures

• TelevisionWithoutPity.com:
  • A fan favorite for its hilarious detailed show recaps (even if you’ve already watched the episode).
    • “They basically do recaps of television shows, but they are hilarious.” (D, 11:17)
• Tabloid Aggregator:
  • Mentions a site where all tabloid headlines are summarized, so you don’t have to buy the mags—democratising fluff news.

3. Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “Not that I have ever had both windows opened up, like an Excel spreadsheet on one side and then got solitaire on the other. And you just click on one that covers the other when the boss comes by.” (C, 01:16)
• “Omg, can you get arrested for just looking bad?” (B, 06:15)
• “Try to guess what they did… look at the picture and try to guess what they really did.” (B, 05:50)
• “What about Ray Ronald… He’s definitely, definitely—”
  “See, if he had a middle name like Lee, then he’s a serial killer.” (B & A, 07:03-07:13)
• “You vote on five different choices… how long the couple will last… In this case, this couple got 4.5 years and 75% of people that voted said that they’re going to get divorced.” (B, 09:53)
• “Televisionwithoutpity.com… I actually watch the show and then still read the recaps just to get their take on it!” (D, 11:23)

4. Timestamps for Important Segments

• 01:03–01:29: Workplace time-wasting confessions & quick-switch programs
• 02:06–03:17: Addictive flash games (Collapse, virtual bubble wrap, “Pop It”)
• 03:45–04:54: Listener recommendations: OddTodd, Sudoku, GwinnettCountySheriff mugshots
• 05:50–07:46: Cast’s mugshot guessing game—funny and irreverent
• 08:02–08:54: Listener sites: KillSomeTime.com, UglyDresses.com; Bert introduces WeddingBettin.com
• 09:53–11:06: Cast proposes uploading their own photos, further banter around WeddingBettin.com
• 11:17–12:06: TelevisionWithoutPity.com and tabloid aggregator mention

5. Tone and Style

The episode maintains the Bert Show’s signature blend of authenticity, irreverence, and easy camaraderie. The hosts freely poke fun at each other and themselves, foster listener engagement, and keep the tone light and inclusive. The humor is often playful but occasionally veers into cheeky or mildly edgy territory, especially when roasting mugshots or speculating about crimes.

6. Podcast Episode Flow

1. Confession Hour: Hosts set the scene with tales of wasted hours and clever ways to "look busy."
2. Nostalgic Games: Remembering once-addictive websites and games, both solitary and social.
3. Listener Involvement: Callers share their favorite online distractions, sparking more stories and games.
4. Laughs & Judgement: The mugshot game becomes a highlight, blending humor with a touch of dark comedy.
5. Sharing the Wealth: The cast and listeners pool together an impressive list of websites—many available on the Bert Show’s own site.
6. Meta Moment: The cast considers putting themselves in the firing line, crowdsourcing predictions on their own relationships.
7. Sign-Off with More Tips: A few last website suggestions round out the segment, underscoring the endless possibilities for killing time online.

Key Time-Killing Websites Mentioned

• OddTodd.com – Cartoons, fun stories.
• Sudoku.com – Numbers puzzles.
• GwinnettCountySheriff.com – Public mugshot database.
• KillSomeTime.com – Funny viral videos and photos.
• UglyDresses.com – Hilariously bad wedding/prom dresses.
• WeddingBettin.com – Rate couple’s marital prospects based on wedding photos.
• TelevisionWithoutPity.com – Sarcastic show recaps.
• Tabloid Aggregator (unnamed) – Summarized celebrity/tabloid stories.

For Listeners Who Missed the Episode:

This episode is a fast, funny, and altogether too real survey of the digital distractions that get us through the day. Expect to laugh, reminisce, and maybe add a few new bookmarks to your “rainy day” folder.