Vault: Tracey's baby is already talking at 3 months!

Summary

The Bert Show — Vault: Tracey's Baby is Already Talking at 3 Months!

Date: May 5, 2026
Cast: Tracy, Dick, Ella’s Mom, Friend 1, Friend 2, Caller Melissa, others

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Episode Overview

This lighthearted episode centers around Tracy and the Bert Show team discussing Tracy’s claim that her baby, Ella, has started talking at only 3 months old. The conversation flows through friendly skepticism, eager parental pride, and playful teasing, capturing moments of both genuine curiosity and outright hilarity as the group listens to a "proof" recording and debates what qualifies as a baby’s first words.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Parental Pride (01:01–02:38)

• The team introduces Tracy’s baby, Ella, marveling (and poking fun) at parental tendencies to believe their child is exceptionally gifted.
• Notable quote:
  • Dick: “It’s moms, man, that just raise their children up and create these scenarios...to make them seem like they really are the most special child in the world.” (01:45)
• Ella’s mom admits to seeing only perfection in her daughter, humorously insisting “I have flaws. Ella does not.” (01:39)
• Discussion about mobility milestones—Ella’s dad, Scott, is convinced their baby could walk if she had “a little bit more muscle.” (02:06)

2. The Early Talking Claim (02:38–03:22)

• Ella’s mom claims the baby is already talking at three months (02:41).
• Team debates typical milestones: “Most babies will start around six or seven months saying their first words like doggy, mama, dada.” (02:59 – Friend 1).
• Ella’s mom: “She’s already saying mama.” (03:04)
• The group jokes about the kinds of words babies typically say, and whether Ella’s babbles count as real words.

3. The “Proof”: Audio/Video Playback (03:50–07:27)

• Tracy presents a recording as "proof" that Ella is indeed speaking.
  • The crew insists on honesty, with Tracy saying, “Don’t just try and make me seem crazy.” (04:13)
• The first playback leads to much laughter and parody; the sounds are ambiguous, and the group jokes about giving meaning to random baby noise.
• Notable banter:
  • Dick: “It’s like the Atlanta Ghost Hunters. You do have a ghost in the house. You know that, right? Did you hear that?” (05:42)
• They try again, with multiple replays and good-natured teasing about the “M” sound.
  • Dick: “Clearly there’s an M sound there.” (07:15)
  • Ella’s Mom: “Yes, clearly she is saying mother.” (07:17)

4. The Video Details & Parental Interpretation (07:27–09:25)

• Tracy jokes about how the video shows Ella not just “talking” but also performing other impossible feats (like “riding a unicycle” or “writing a book”)—an extended riff on parental exaggeration.
• Ella’s dad is even caught on video “trying to form her mouth” to say “Mommy,” drawing comparisons to a ventriloquist.
  • Tracy: “He’s like that Terry Fader, America’s Got Talent dude with the puppet.” (08:27)
• Caller Melissa phones in to share her similar experience—her child also started saying “mama” during fussy moments long before associating the word with her mom. (09:35)
  • “She’s still not associating me with the word, though. She says mama and everybody says she says mama, but there’s no association with it.” (09:35)

5. Universal Parent Experiences & Sound Triggers (09:40–end)

• The team commiserates over false baby “first words” and parents’ tendency to hear what they want.
  • Dick: “[My wife] would just make these gurgling noises and Stacy would go, ‘Did you hear that? He just said California.’” (09:48)
• Tangent on sound effects on the radio—like crying babies or car honks—tricking listeners into reacting in real life.
  • Dick: “What will get me every single time…is that sound of the baby that they play when they’re telling you to turn your cell phones off, silence is golden…” (10:51)

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Notable Quotes and Moments

• Parental Exaggeration:

  • Dick: “She’s saying padre.” (03:29)
  • Tracy: “Ella had actually driven here a stick shift...to give me my Spanish lesson.” (04:25)
  • Ella’s Mom: “We already are studying for the SAT.” (02:32)

• Skepticism and Humor:

  • Tracy: “When you see it, you realize it’s just a grumpy, hungry kid making noises.” (04:48)
  • Friend 2: “Isn’t it almost like baby talk? Like psychics where they give a prediction and you fit in whatever you want it to be...” (03:31)

• Listener Call-Ins:

  • Caller Melissa: “...once I heard the video, I have to agree because my daughter also started by saying mama, and it was when she was fussing...” (09:02)
  • Second Melissa: “She says mama and everybody says she says mama, but there’s no association with it.” (09:35)

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Key Timestamps

• 01:01 — Conversation begins, Tracy introduced
• 02:41 — Ella’s “talking” claim, “She’s already talking...”
• 03:22 — Debating first words and milestones
• 03:50 — Tracy brings in “proof” recording
• 05:42 — Dick likens the hunt for “mama” to ghost hunting
• 07:15 — “Clearly there’s an M sound there”
• 08:27 — Video shows dad forming Ella’s mouth
• 09:35 — Caller Melissa, “No association with it”
• 10:51 — Tangent on baby sounds in public spaces

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Tone & Style

The episode is playful, irreverent, and packed with the type of teasing and camaraderie the Bert Show is known for. Parents (and non-parents) will recognize themselves in the mix of pride, wishful thinking, and the never-ending urge to find “extraordinary” moments in the everyday mysteries of babyhood.

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Summary for New Listeners: This episode is a comedic, relatable exploration of new parent triumphs and delusions—anchored by Tracy’s insistence that her baby is a prodigy and the team’s affectionate skepticism. With real listener input and plenty of laughs, it’s a fun listen for anyone who’s been around doting parents or was once a “gifted” baby themselves.

Transcript

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[Tracy]

hey.

[Dick]

The bird show producer Tracy has produced for us. And when I say us, the world. A golden child.

[Ella's Mom]

She is the smartest child ever created.

[Tracy]

I really didn't think you'd be one of these people.

[Friend 1]

Really?

[Ella's Mom]

Are you serious?

[Dick]

Uh huh. I didn't think it would be to this extent.

[Friend 2]

Really?

[Dick]

Yes.

[Friend 2]

Then you become that Tracy. But she's a perfectionist, so everything in her life's gonna be perfect.

[Tracy]

She also has never had a problem acknowledging like, reality shortcomings. Like, or like, you know, like she says, oh, I'm a perfectionist. But she'll admit when she's not organized or whatever. But you would.

[Friend 2]

This is her child.

[Dick]

This is different.

[Ella's Mom]

I have flaws. Ella does not.

[Friend 1]

Yeah. Baby has zero, zero problems.

[Dick]

There really is a difference, man. And I gotta put this more on moms than I do dads. It's moms, man, that just raise their children up and just create these scenarios. I don't know, that don't really exist to make them seem like they really are the most special child in the world.

[Ella's Mom]

No.

[Friend 1]

Thank goodness for that. The kids grow up more.

[Ella's Mom]

I think Scott's actually worse than me, really, because there's things that Ella will do and I don't have the heart to tell him that. It's like a natural reflex because you can hold a newborn baby up and then like they'll automatically start making like the walking motion. I mean, all babies do it from birth, but Scott is convinced that if she only had a little bit more muscle, she could walk.

[Friend 2]

That's funny.

[Dick]

You're not too far behind, I gotta tell you.

[Friend 2]

I know.

[Ella's Mom]

Well, I mean, she is pretty smart. We already are studying for the sat. I have to say, how do you

[Dick]

determine if a 4 month old is smart or not?

[Ella's Mom]

Because she's already talking.

[Dick]

Okay.

[Ella's Mom]

And she's only three and a half months. And she's been talking since three months.

[Friend 1]

Okay. And what is like the typical time for kids to start talking?

[Ella's Mom]

Well, I hear it's very rare if they start at four months. Now, mind you, she started at three. But most babies will start around six or seven.

[Friend 1]

She's advanced six or seven months. They'll start saying their first words like doggy, mama, dada.

[Ella's Mom]

Exactly. And she's already saying mama.

[Friend 2]

Really?

[Ella's Mom]

Yes.

[Friend 1]

Now, isn't da, da typically the first thing that they say? Because it's easier for them to pronounce typically.

[Ella's Mom]

But my daughter does not take the easy way, ok? She's.

[Dick]

She takes challenges head on.

[Friend 1]

She's gifted.

[Dick]

Head on. That's what gifted children do.

[Ella's Mom]

Dad was way too easy for her. She already moved on to mama.

[Friend 2]

Now, are you.

[Ella's Mom]

She's actually.

[Dick]

She's saying padre.

[Friend 2]

Yeah. I mean, isn't it almost like baby talk? Like psychics where they give a prediction and you fit in whatever you want it to be, and with babies, it probably. And then you say, oh, she said mama.

[Tracy]

My psychic said one of our houses would burn down, and a hotel I was at in a different city caught on fire three days after I left. And I'm like, there it is.

[Ella's Mom]

There it is. I knew you guys would say that, which is why I videotaped it.

[Dick]

Okay, so you have brought in proof. I have brought in proof that she is speaking already.

[Ella's Mom]

Yes.

[Tracy]

Okay, now how do you guys want to do this? Because I think.

[Friend 1]

Do you have to see the video?

[Dick]

Whatever way humiliates Tracy more is the way I want to go.

[Ella's Mom]

Oh, hold on, though. I do want you guys all to promise, though, because you are being. You know, you're a little skeptical of me if you think that she really is saying it. You have to be totally honest. Like, don't just try and make me seem crazy.

[Tracy]

Well, here's the deal. Because Tracy did play this for me last week, you know, back when she was only three months old and talking. And Ella had actually driven here a stick shift, which is embarrassing because I can't even drive a stick. But Ella drove here to give me my Spanish lesson.

[Dick]

She was using the hand signal. She wasn't even using the signal. Right. She knows left and right already, right?

[Tracy]

Cause she wanted to bring me the first draft of her book that she wrote. And so I got to see. I got to hear this. And when you hear it, I think there's potential. But when you see it, you realize it's just a grumpy, hungry kid making noises.

[Friend 1]

Well, let's not have you preconceived, though.

[Friend 2]

Just play it.

[Tracy]

Well, that's what I'm saying. Do you guys want to watch it? Because I have it on my computer.

[Friend 1]

I want to hear it first.

[Tracy]

So I'll just play it. Hype this up because it's low.

[Baby Voice Actor]

Can you say mommy?

[Tracy]

Oh, that's not Ella.

[Baby Voice Actor]

Can you say mommy?

[Dick]

It's like the Atlanta Ghost Hunters. You do have a ghost in the house. You know that, right? Did you hear that?

[Tracy]

She panicked.

[Dick]

Where the hell is the mommy in this whole thing?

[Ella's Mom]

She said it four times.

[Tracy]

That sounded like a mom.

[Friend 2]

Yeah, it sounds like mom.

[Tracy]

Right here. Sorry. Somebody's playing.

[Dick]

And she's playing the harp.

[Ella's Mom]

Wow, look at the musician, too.

[Tracy]

Now somebody's jacking with me.

[Ella's Mom]

She's singing in the key of A.

[Friend 2]

Her gas is very melodic.

[Dick]

You are right. She is an angel.

[Tracy]

So that was what I heard and thought that perhaps it could be.

[Dick]

Let's hear this one more time.

[Tracy]

Okay.

[Dick]

Pause it right after you hear mommy.

[Tracy]

Just raise your hand when you.

[Friend 2]

I think it's Mommy.

[Tracy]

Raise your hand, Tracy, when you want me to pause it.

[Melissa]

Okay?

[Friend 1]

Okay.

[Tracy]

By the way, it's worth noting when you'll see this on the video. She's riding a unicycle.

[Dick]

That was it.

[Tracy]

Hold on. Let's hear it again.

[Ella's Mom]

Duh.

[Tracy]

Here you go.

[Dick]

That was it.

[Ella's Mom]

Well, that was the first part you have. She says mama.

[Tracy]

Oh, sorry, Dick, stop it. Too soon.

[Friend 2]

Yes.

[Baby Voice Actor]

Can you say mommy?

[Dick]

Clearly there's an M sound there.

[Ella's Mom]

Yes, clearly she is saying mother.

[VRBoCare Announcer]

To me.

[Friend 1]

She just sounds hungry.

[Tracy]

Now this is what's going to ruin it.

[Dick]

Mommy in there.

[Ella's Mom]

Like mama.

[Road Safety PSA Speaker]

There's an M sound.

[Ella's Mom]

Wait, she's grumbling it.

[Melissa]

Okay.

[Tracy]

If you. If you do it while watching the video, you can see she's just pissed and she's just sitting there mad.

[Dick]

I don't need to see the video to hear that.

[Melissa]

Mommy.

[Baby Voice Actor]

Can you say mommy?

[Ella's Mom]

And she may very well be hungry. But doesn't her food come from Mama? That's what I said. She's hungry.

[Friend 2]

But I will say she's a little aggressive about it.

[Ella's Mom]

She's getting it out there.

[Friend 2]

I will say. You know how Jen said earlier that usually dada is the first one because it's easier to say, and she's making obviously making M noises.

[Ella's Mom]

So I think.

[Friend 2]

I do think mom is going to be the first word she says.

[Tracy]

I didn't notice this. But at this point in the video, Scott actually tries to use his finger to form her mouth into. Look at. Watch it. Watch this.

[Friend 2]

Are you serious?

[Tracy]

Like, mommy. Like, he's like that Terry Fader, America's Got Talent dude with the puppet.

[Ella's Mom]

I don't know what you guys are talking about. She's clearly saying, oh, there she is.

[Dick]

Hey, Kim, good Morning. You're on Q100.

[Friend 2]

Hi.

[Tracy]

Hey.

[Melissa]

I was just calling to say at first I was kind of skeptical too, like, this is not going to be accurate. But once I heard the video, I have to agree because my daughter also started by saying mama, and it was when she was fussing and it was just mama, Ma, Ma. And it turn. Turned into mama.

[Friend 2]

Yeah.

[Melissa]

Cause I didn't say anything to anyone at first because I kind of, you know, I was like, is this really what she's saying? But yeah, I agree that that is what she's saying right there.

[Friend 2]

Well, I. I mean, is it, is it not that when she is, you know, getting her milk that she has to pucker and suck? So I would assume the mama, you know, like the mouth motion is, I want food. But eventually it'll be mama.

[Ella's Mom]

No, it's mama now. Melissa,

[Tracy]

do you still have it up Burp.

[Dick]

Hold on one second. Let me take a call. Good morning, Melissa. You're on Q100.

[Melissa]

I have a six month old. She started doing the same thing at three months old. She's still not associating me with. With the word, though. She says mama and everybody says she says mama, but there's no association with it.

[Dick]

That's just the first one out of her mouth. Stacy used to do the same thing with both Hayden and Hollis. They would just make these gurgling noises and Stacy would go, did you hear that? He just said California.

[Ella's Mom]

What?

[Dick]

It was California.

[Ella's Mom]

Obviously, I think you're just skeptical. Like I think it is pretty.

[Tracy]

Oh, hold on. Your baby needs you.

[Ella's Mom]

She's clearly saying mama.

[Tracy]

Hey, Bert, every time we need Tracy, we just play this. I'm actually gonna set that to be my ringtone so that when you call, that's what my phone does.

[Dick]

Hey, Val. Good morning.

[Melissa]

Oh, my gosh.

[Caller with Alarm Clock]

That is the scariest thing ever. I have my alarm clock set to Q100, and I have my six month old in the room next to me. Yeah, your music or the sound came on. I did not hear mama. I heard a baby crying. I run to my baby's room. They're crying from the other way.

[Friend 2]

Oh, my God.

[Tracy]

Oh, my God. Somebody put another baby in my house.

[Dick]

You know what will get me every single time, even though I know it is in the movie theater? Is that sound of the baby that they play when they're telling you to turn your cell phones off, silence is golden or whatever. And every time they play the baby, you're like, it sounds like. It always sounds like it's in the theater.

[Ella's Mom]

You like looking around?

[Dick]

Where's that damn baby?

[Tracy]

I think that they should ban car honking from radio commercials.

[Dick]

I agree.

[Tracy]

That gets me every single time. Or sirens.

[Dick]

One more time here, Jeff. The bird show.