Vault: Was dating a single dad worth it?

Summary

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The Bert Show – Vault: Was Dating a Single Dad Worth It?

Date: June 15, 2026
Main Speakers: Host (Bird), Roxy, Jeff, Jen, Single Dad Callers

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Episode Overview

This episode centers on the complexities and considerations of dating a single parent in your 20s. Roxy shares her recent experience going out with a single dad, discussing her prior uncertainty about having children and what it was like to date someone who already has a child. The cast and listeners weigh in on issues of chemistry, communication, and etiquette specific to dating parents.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

Roxy’s Perspective: The Date with a Single Dad

• Initial Hesitation
  • Roxy explains she’s only 24 and still figuring out if she wants children, making her hesitant about dating dads.
    “I didn't know if I want children. I still don't know if I want children. I'm only 24…” (01:38, Roxy)
• The Date Experience
  • Roxy met with a single dad at a sports bar for food and drinks.
  • She describes him as the “most attentive date” she’s ever had: lots of thoughtful questions and interest in her life and style (01:58-02:54).
  • While she appreciated his attentiveness and caring nature, she felt no romantic chemistry. “There was just no chemistry. And I wanted there to be chemistry because he was so attentive.” (02:54, Roxy)

The Cast’s Reaction: Is Attentiveness Enough?

• Jeff points out, “Isn’t that the point of a date?” (02:55, Jeff) referencing the importance of getting to know someone.
• Jen observes that many men talk about themselves on dates rather than focusing on their date (03:23, Jen).
• Roxy concludes she wouldn’t avoid single dads in the future, despite this one not being a match:
  “I would never be opposed to dating a single dad because I thought it was great.” (03:34, Roxy)

Navigating Post-Date Communication

• Roxy admits the single dad texted after the date expressing interest, but she hasn’t replied definitively. “He texted me as soon as we got done with the date saying he had a great time. And I was like, I had a great time too, but I haven't really established that there won't be another date.” (04:34, Roxy)
• The team debates the etiquette of “ghosting” after one date vs. providing a clear, honest message—especially when the other person is a parent with limited time.
  • Bird: “If you’re a single parent, the last thing in the world you have is time. Right. It’s all about time management.” (04:47, Host)
  • Jeff: “I think it goes back to…a little more responsibility in communication when it comes to this.” (05:10, Jeff)
  • Jen: “You can just not return the phone call and not return the text, and it’s fine…after one date.” (05:28, Jen)

Listener Calls: The Single Parent Perspective

• Caller #1: A single mom dating a man, agrees honesty is best, especially given limited time (06:21).
  • “Kids, it is all about time management, and it's hard to balance sometimes. ... I would be honest with him.” (06:26, Single Dad Caller)
• Caller #2: Single dad urges for clarity to save everyone’s time.
  • “You do have to let him know because we really don't have time to waste time with everything else.” (08:30, Single Dad Caller)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Funny Banter on Single Dads & “Monkey Joes”
  “You've been hanging out at a lot of Monkey Joes, right? Looking for guys there?”
  (01:49, Spinquest Promoter)
  “Actually, Johnny has hideaway.” (01:52, Roxy)
  “Different kind of daddy. That's a sugar daddy.” (01:54, Host)

• The Core Issue
  “It's not the kid. It’s you.” (06:14, Roxy, with laughter)

• Bird’s Practical Advice
  “Hey man, thanks so much, but this is more of a friendship thing for me than anything else.” (07:53, Host/Bird)

• The “Universal Sign”
  “If you don’t hear from someone, they’re not interested whether you got kids or not…” (08:17, Jen)

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Important Timestamps

• 01:31 – Initial debrief: Roxy on dating a single dad
• 01:38-02:54 – Roxy explains her concerns and recounts the date’s highlights
• 03:34 – Roxy on remaining open-minded about dating single dads
• 04:34-05:28 – Post-date texting etiquette and team’s debate
• 06:21-07:16 – Caller perspectives from single parents
• 08:30 – Single dad caller stresses importance of directness

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Episode Takeaways

• Attentiveness is valuable but not always enough for romantic chemistry.
• Dating a single parent includes special considerations: time management and possibly different life stages.
• Honest, timely communication is especially respectful when parents are involved.
• “Ghosting” is still debated—most agree clarity is appreciated if the parent is invested or following up.
• The panel encourages listeners to remain open-minded about dating single parents, provided there’s honest self-reflection and clear communication.

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Transcript

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[Host (Bird)]

The Bird show so how'd it go this weekend here? I mean, it's a pretty big deal. I mean, single dad wants to take you out. You were sort of on the fence about it.

[Roxy]

Kind of on the fence because we talked earlier in the week and all the time that I've been going out, I've been meeting a lot more dads that have had children and I didn't know if I want children. I still don't know if I want children. I'm only 24 and you've been hanging

[Spinquest Promoter]

out at a lot of Monkey Joes, right? Looking for guys there?

[Roxy]

Actually, Johnny has hideaway.

[Spinquest Promoter]

Yeah, okay.

[Host (Bird)]

Different kind of daddy. That's a sugar daddy.

[Roxy]

No, I mean, I'm just not sure if I really Want children yet. It's. It was concerning with me and getting involved with a single dad because when you introduce. When you get introduced with. To the kid at all. And I don't want that responsibility just yet, or I don't think I did. So I had a date lined up with this guy who had had a couple of conversations with. Seemed really awesome. So on Sunday, we went to a sports bar and just watched some sports and had a couple of beers and some dinner. And I have to say it was probably the most attentive date I've ever had. Very concerned and asking me questions and getting to know about me. So conversation was great. Actually talked about his style for a little while, which I thought was cool. Showed me pictures and was just a really awesome dad, which I thought was cool because he's caring. But besides that, there was just no chemistry. And I wanted there to be chemistry because he was so attentive. Like, I think I've never been on a date where someone was just so concerned about getting to know you as a person.

[Host (Bird)]

How crazy.

[Jeff]

Isn't that the point of a date?

[Roxy]

Weird kind of the point of the date. But, I mean, it sounds like he

[Jen]

was a respectful guy, too.

[Roxy]

Very respectful. Concerned about if I was doing okay, if I needed anything else on the table. But. But yeah, there's just.

[Single Dad Caller]

And.

[Host (Bird)]

And guys you normally go out with. That's not the case.

[Roxy]

I mean, just constantly making sure if I needed anything. I mean, no, like, guys don't really ask questions. I mean, sometimes it's an uncomfortable conversation, but they don't really, like, ask about your life and where you grew up and what else about you.

[Jen]

Sometimes guys like to talk about themselves. Bird.

[Host (Bird)]

The entire time.

[Spinquest Promoter]

And you guys do or don't like that.

[Jeff]

Did you say something, Jeff?

[Roxy]

But other than that, there was no chemistry. But I honestly, I would never be opposed to dating a single dad because I thought it was great.

[Jen]

You sort of opened the doors to that category. Just not necessarily this dude.

[Roxy]

Yeah, not necessarily this guy. But there was nothing bad about him having a kid. I was actually really excited to learn about his child.

[Host (Bird)]

Do you think that you would run into the same situation with other single dads just because you guys are at such different places in your life that there's just not. It doesn't even afford the time to be sort of compatible right now?

[Roxy]

Maybe. But I just. I mean, I don't know.

[Jeff]

You don't. You don't know if it's a conscious thought that you didn't have chemistry or if it was just it would have been there whether he was a single dad or not.

[Roxy]

I think so. I mean, yeah, I didn't have a problem that he had a kid. That was not even the issue. There's just no spark. There was nothing.

[Jen]

You didn't want to smooch him.

[Roxy]

There was no wanting to kiss him, go do a movie afterwards. There was just nothing there.

[Host (Bird)]

Do you think that he was feeling the same way on his end, or do you think he's still interested?

[Roxy]

I think he was still interested at the end of the date. So I haven't texted him back. He texted me as soon as we got done with the date saying he had a great time. And I was like, I had a great time, too, but I haven't really established that there won't be another date.

[Host (Bird)]

Now, here's. This is the interesting question right here, because as we said last week, is that if you're a single parent, the last thing in the world you have is time. Right. It's all about time management.

[Roxy]

Sure.

[Host (Bird)]

So if you're a single parent and you get past the first date, you're still into it, but the person that you're with isn't. Would you just want to know on that second date or that second call just to say, hey, it's just not working for me, so you don't have to continue to go and waste your time?

[Jeff]

Yeah, I mean, I think. I think it goes back to our conversation last week about there being a little more responsibility in communication when it comes to this. Him being, you know, communicating about his child and you being honest about how you feel about it. So maybe if, you know, there's really no shot, then maybe you do need to shut that door with him.

[Jen]

I don't think you have to say anything after one date. I think you can just not return the phone call and not return the text, and it's fine.

[Spinquest Promoter]

Cut it off.

[Host (Bird)]

So the rules are the same that if you're not interested, you just let

[Jen]

it fade after one date, had they been out on three or four? Yes, it's worth a conversation or at least an exchange of an email or a text or something like that. But I think after one date, say,

[Jeff]

there's a part of me that I feel bad like, I don't want him to think that it's because he's a

[Roxy]

dad, but that'd be me.

[Jeff]

I'm just saying. I don't know if that applies, but

[Spinquest Promoter]

I'd be like, you know, so maybe there's like a. Some E card that says, I would like you even if you didn't have. Or I would not like you even if you had no kids.

[Roxy]

Yeah, exactly like that type of.

[Spinquest Promoter]

So there's got to be a way to convey that message.

[Jeff]

Blue Mountain, I'm sure, has something with some kind of airbrush, you know, picture with it.

[Jen]

It's you.

[Jeff]

Yeah.

[Roxy]

It's not the kid. It's you.

[Jeff]

Can I.

[Roxy]

Can I go?

[Jeff]

Can I babysit your kid, then?

[Host (Bird)]

Hey, Roxy. Good morning.

[Single Dad Caller]

Good morning. Hey, guys. I'm actually in the same sort of situation, but I'm the one with the kids.

[Roxy]

Okay.

[Single Dad Caller]

And I'm dating a guy who's forcing me to communicate all the time. Kind of opposite of what y' all are doing. But I would want to know. Kids, it is all about time management, and it's hard to balance sometimes. But this guy I'm with is just so wonderful. He's so understanding when like, well, I can't go tonight. One of the kids is sick or whatever. But I would be honest with him. If you don't think there's going to be another date, I would tell him after one date. Well, I mean, if she doesn't want to go out with him again. Yeah.

[Host (Bird)]

Okay, so doesn't. Wouldn't that be determined on how many. How aggressive he is at trying to get a second date? Like, if he keeps texting her, then at that point, shouldn't she say something? Or is she obligated immediately right now, the next time he texts to say, look, this isn't working for me?

[Single Dad Caller]

Well, if she likes being pursued, then, yeah, keep letting him text her. I'm just saying.

[Roxy]

I mean, he hasn't text back after the initial text, and we did talk about how it's hard for him to date, but it's literally. And the other key factor was that I don't think he's been divorced that long either. I think it's only been less than maybe eight months since he's been divorced. So I don't.

[Jen]

She's still pissed off.

[Roxy]

I can't tell. I can't. I mean, I don't know.

[Host (Bird)]

She stopped listening.

[Roxy]

I just wanted to talk about me. No. I mean, yeah, he said it's a problem dating. He's. He was like, thanks for taking a chance on me. Thanks for coming out and spending time with me. So I think that was a little bit of a. If he factored two.

[Jeff]

I don't want to be the real.

[Host (Bird)]

I'm on the opposite end of Jen on this. I think if he texts you again or he calls you again, I Think if I'm you just because he's a single dad and there's a time management issue there, I just go, hey, man, thanks so much, but this is more of a friendship thing for me than anything else.

[Roxy]

But that's only if.

[Host (Bird)]

If. Yeah, I mean, I don't think you have to volunteer that. You're saying so if he texts three, four, five times, everybody gets the point.

[Jen]

If you don't hear from someone, they're not interested whether you got kids or not. And then if that's the universal sign of I'm not interested is ignore.

[Host (Bird)]

Hey, Adam, We've got about 10 seconds here, man.

[Single Dad Caller]

Hey, I'm a single dad and I do have custody of my kid. It's just kind of. You do have to let him know because we really don't have time to waste time with everything else.

[Host (Bird)]

So, like, she doesn't need to volunteer it though, right? Like, if he texts or calls, then she'll let him know.

[Single Dad Caller]

Yeah, that would be fine. Yeah.

[Roxy]

Okay.

[Host (Bird)]

You're not gonna do it. You're let him slide.

[Roxy]

There's no text message yet, so I don't have to worry about it. I guess I'll worry about that if it comes in or the phone calls come in. But right now, no.

[Host (Bird)]

The bird show.

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