Vault: We Can't Believe The Double Lives These Listeners Are Living

Summary

Podcast Summary: The Bert Show – Vault: We Can't Believe The Double Lives These Listeners Are Living

Host: Pionaire Podcasting
Date: January 7, 2026
Cast (as identified in transcript): Bert, Kristin, Abby, Cassie, Tommy, and additional callers/listeners

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Episode Overview

Theme:
This episode delves into the fascinating, often shocking reality of people living double lives. Inspired by discussions of infidelity and hidden lives on an Oprah episode, the Bert Show cast—led by Bert—opens up the phone lines for listeners to call in anonymously (with voice disguise) and share their own stories of secret identities, infidelity, or parallel existences. The cast reacts candidly and often humorously, exploring the why and how behind these double lives.

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Key Discussion Points and Insights

1. Double Lives: Inspired by Pop Culture ([01:44]–[02:59])

• Bert recounts watching an Oprah episode on infidelity featuring men who had families in different cities, sparking the episode’s theme.
  • Reference: "One guy was talking about how he had been messing around on his wife for like five years and he was living like a double life." – Bert ([01:44])
  • Book Mention: The Pilot’s Wife—story of a pilot with multiple families in multiple locations.

2. Personal Anecdotes from the Cast ([03:14]–[05:04])

• Bert shares a personal story about his own father, a traveling salesman who maintained relationships with multiple women while married, including showing nude photos to Bert as an adult.
  • Notable Moment: Bert's discomfort and subsequent estrangement from his father due to these revelations.
  • Quote: "He showed me pictures of the woman that he'd been living with in Vegas for, like, years, years and years and years." ([04:11])

3. Setting up Listener Calls ([05:06]–[07:46])

• The show invites listeners to call in and confess their own double lives, promising anonymity and voice disguise.

Types of Double Lives Discussed:

• Romantic/sexual secrets (affairs, open marriages unknown to outside partners)
• Job secrets (e.g., lying about being in the CIA, false professional identities)

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Notable Listener Stories

4. Caller “Mary/Marie”—Open Marriage with a Hidden Twist ([07:46]–[09:19])

• Marie reveals she’s in an open marriage (her husband knows), but her outside partner does not know she’s married.
  • Quote: “I’m kind of seeing somebody else, and he doesn’t know that I’m married.” – Marie ([07:58])
• Open marriage is on a “don’t ask, don’t tell” basis with her husband.
• The cast is both fascinated and perplexed:
  • Kristin: “What if we just, you know, sex with other people?” ([09:19])—pondering how the conversation even starts.
  • Concern about honesty and the emotional implications behind open relationships.

5. Caller “Kathy”—Married 24 Years and Secret Five-Year Relationship ([09:46]–[12:25])

• Kathy has been with her husband for 24 years, while maintaining a five-year relationship with another man. Both families are unaware.
  • Quote: "I've been married 24 years to the same man, and I've been involved with another man for the past five. And neither one know anything about each other, nor do our families." – Kathy ([09:57])
• She admits to loving both men and feels fear, confusion, and guilt, but can’t bring herself to leave her husband—partly due to their shared child.
  • Memorable Exchange:
    • Kristin: “Does guilty come up anywhere in there?” ([11:32])
    • Kathy: “Yes. It does… I didn't mean to fall in love with another man and I didn't want to, but it's happened.” ([11:35])
  • The cast challenges the notion of loving someone while hiding such a major secret.

6. Caller “Jay”—Student and Secret Escort ([13:58]–[20:15])

• Jay, a college student, shares she receives money from her well-off parents while also secretly working for a male escort service (suggested by a friend). Neither her parents nor most friends are aware.
  • Quote: “I'm a student in school and my parents are pretty lucky. They give me some spending money, but I'm actually making money on my own. I'm a part of a male escort service.” – Jay ([14:14])
• Jay clarifies escort work is sometimes just company, sometimes sex—“It’s a mix of both.” ([16:08])
• She makes enough to be fully financially independent (“could pay off all my tuition, all my bills… and still have plenty of spending money.” [16:31]) and has tens of thousands saved.
  • Quote: "I really do get a lot of money and I like the fact that I don’t have to use my parents’ money because it gives me a little more independence from them." ([18:40])
• The hosts’ curiosity is piqued: They plan to follow up after the show to discuss the specifics more openly.

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Additional Memorable Moments and Quotes

• Navigating Secrecy and Justification:

  • Bert: "How could a guy not know that you’re having an affair for five years?" ([11:05])
  • Caller Kathy: "He just has no idea." ([11:07])

• Emotional Conflict and Decisions:

  • Kristin challenges Kathy’s logic: "You didn’t just happen to fall in love with someone." ([13:13])
  • Kathy: “Well, you’ve never met someone that just makes you fall in love with him as soon as you meet him.” ([13:29])

• Escort Realities:

  • Jay: “I’ve lost track… but it’s definitely in the high thousands.” ([19:22])
  • On personal feelings: “Yeah, I like a lot of issues with it, but at the same time… it’s not like I like what I do. It’s more that it’s–I really do get a lot of money and I like the fact that I don’t have to use my parents’ money…” ([18:40])

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• [01:44]—Introduction of the double life theme
• [03:14]–[05:04]—Bert's story about his father's double life
• [07:46]–[09:19]—Caller Marie: Open marriage, secret from lover
• [09:46]–[13:29]—Caller Kathy: Two relationships, both unaware
• [13:58]–[20:15]—Caller Jay: College student, secret escort life

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Tone and Style

The Bert Show maintains its trademark blend of empathy, directness, and humor. The cast often reacts with genuine curiosity, flashes of incredulity, occasional playful banter, and respect for privacy. The callers are candid and sometimes vulnerable, giving unique insight into the emotional realities of living a double life.

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Conclusion

This episode provides a riveting look at the hidden corners of listeners’ lives, exploring stories that range from the daring to the heartbreaking. By inviting honest confessions, The Bert Show delivers both entertainment and pathos, giving voice to the secret struggles and choices many face but few speak about.

Transcript

[A]

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[B]

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[C]

The Bird show in the meantime I hate starting a sentence like this. I was watching Oprah Winfrey yesterday and she was doing a show on infidelity and it kind of like broke off almost into a discussion on like secret lives of guys. And at one point, one guy was talking about how he had been messing around on his wife for like five years and he was living like a double life. Then they brought another guy on the show and they were talking about how he had another family in another city.

[D]

The best story of that is, and I, I, I've brought this up before because I think Jessica's the one who told me about it. The pilot's wife. It's a book. It's about a woman who was married to a pilot, but he had like two wives in two different cities.

[C]

Yeah, because he'd be able to leave.

[D]

Like three days at a time, you know, because he, you know, like when you're A pilot. You're only allowed to fly so many hours. So many. Whatever. So he was a major airline pilot. So he would have his family, like, let's say, in Alpharetta, and he'd get on a plane, he would fly to, let's say, Los Angeles. Then he'd have two days off. We'd have a family out there with an apartment and a wife and kids. Then he would fly from Los Angeles to, say, Detroit, and he'd have a family in Detroit.

[E]

Why, like, from a guy's perspective, why would you want to do that? Like, I almost could understand it. I mean, I don't condone it, but I can almost understand, like, the pilot's wife being, like, the wife writing the story about him having mistresses everywhere, but other families everywhere. I don't get that.

[C]

The family thing, I don't get. I kind of have a relating story as far as living a double life, though, goes with my dad. And I don't know that I've ever shared this with you guys.

[E]

Really?

[C]

Yeah. When I got out to California, I was part of a divorce. My mom stayed in New York, and my dad moved on out to California. And a couple of years after the divorce, I became the divorce trophy, and I went out to California to go live with my dad. And it was soon thereafter that where he just didn't care about me too much. But in the meantime, he was a traveling salesman. He sold plans to, like, hotels, to, like, Caesar's Palace. And I can't remember the names of the hotels at that time, but I'll just give you some examples, like the Palm Palms Mirage. But it was even before those hotels were up. Anyway, so he was in San Diego with me and my stepmom, like, four days out of the week, and he was in Vegas three days out of the week. And I think I told you guys this, that on my, like, 21st birthday, he took me, like, to strip club. To strip club and told me about all the infidelities he ever had in his life. And he showed me pictures of the woman that he'd been living with in Vegas for, like, years, years and years and years.

[E]

And he's. But he's now remarried to your stepmother.

[C]

He was remarried to my stepmother. At this point, this is just a sick story, but, like, nude pictures of this woman that he was living with in Las Vegas, which could take us on to a completely different tangent here.

[E]

Why he's showing his son that.

[C]

Right. You know, which is probably part of the reason why we're not talking to each other anymore, especially the way they.

[D]

Kept themselves in the 70s and 80s.

[E]

Yuck.

[C]

There's a whole topiary situation worth of.

[E]

It that will take us in a completely different situation.

[D]

Seriously. Here's a warning to young boys. If you're up in the attic and you find a penthouse from the 70s, do not open it because you will be traumatized forever.

[E]

Okay, there's the other tangent.

[C]

Okay, so my dad was living this double life also. So as I was watching the show a couple of days ago, I started to think and I'm hoping that we can use the voice disguiser on this. I want to know if there are any Burch show listeners that are listening right now that will come clean and tell us about the double life that you're living or that you have lived. 404-741-1005 and again, I want to say we'll use the voice disguise. We'll change your name on this thing.

[E]

Now, would this also apply to women?

[C]

Sure. Oh, absolutely.

[E]

Who are doing the same thing.

[C]

And it could be anything. It doesn't necessarily have to be infidelities. It could be a job that your wife or husband didn't know you have. I've told you about that guy that we found out. CIA dude that we were living across from in Alexandria, Virginia, was telling his wife for years that he had a top secret job with the CIA, or it was the FBI, I think, and he had to go to different countries to try to hack into other countries computers. So he'd be gone for weeks at a time. And his job was so top secret that he couldn't even tell her where he was going. And if she ever needed to get in touch with him, she could certainly call his colonel, quote, unquote, and get in touch with him. This went on for years. Years. And she found out later that dude was never in the FBI, never in the CIA, nothing. He was just out. He was in different countries. He actually was working for the CIA. FBI, but not as much in a top secret job as he said he had. And he was traveling, but he had different women in different countries.

[E]

And his colonel was like his best buddy, like a cover for him.

[C]

Right. To some dude that worked with him.

[B]

Yeah.

[D]

Let me ask you this because tell me if this falls into the category or if this is a completely different topic altogether, but when we are on vacation, I overheard somebody at another table talking about how they were a radio personality in Philadelphia. And Philadelphia is the city I worked at, worked in before I worked here in Atlanta. So I, you Know, you hear, like, 50% of the conversation, but those words stand out. So when I was leaving dinner, I went and, you know, asked him, and it was him and his girlfriend he was traveling with, and they were talking to the wait staff, and I asked him where he worked in Philadelphia, and he said, nah, I just made that up because I just make stuff up. I create different lives for different people. So I decided to be a radio personality in Philadelphia for the waitress.

[C]

Oh, you're kidding.

[D]

And, like, he turns out he's a car salesman.

[C]

Yeah, I think it's a totally different subject.

[D]

Okay.

[C]

Yeah. Why you lie for the sake of lying kind of thing.

[D]

Oh, yeah, that's right.

[C]

But I think this is totally different. So if you're living a double life in any way, shape or form, we want to hear from you. Good morning. So, Cindy, you're on the voice disguiser. Cindy just bailed. Oh, well, you got two calls to roll through. Good morning, Mary, you are on Marie Marie on all the hits. Q100.

[A]

Hi. I'm leaving Double life. I have an open marriage, and, like, my husband knows about it, and I'm kind of seeing somebody else, and he doesn't know that I'm married.

[C]

Okay, say that one. Give us that one more time.

[A]

Me and my husband have an open marriage, and I'm kind of seeing somebody else that that person doesn't know that I'm married.

[C]

Okay, so your. Your double life really comes from the guy that you're having sex with outside of your marriage?

[A]

Yes. Like, we started out being just sex buddies, you know, it was fine. Then he told me the other day that he wants to date me. I'm like, oh, okay.

[C]

And you have one of these open marriage type deals where your husband's okay with you doing that?

[A]

Yeah, we kind of have a don't ask, don't tell. Like, we won't say, oh, well, I'm sleeping with such and such and such person. We just, like, just do it.

[D]

Hey, how does that come up?

[A]

Well, we were just talking one day. We have, like, totally different work schedules, and we're just maybe talking about being swingers. We're like, nah, we don't want to do that. And then we were both like, well, what if we just. Just have sex with other people, you know, and see how we like that. If we don't like it, if it's too weird, we just won't do it anymore.

[C]

Yeah, there are. There are, like, three dozen questions I'd love to shoot off of you about this kind of thing, but it's before 8:30, and we kind of got. We kind of got to try to be sensitive about it, so. Well, I guess, you know, what we'll do is we'll take your number and we'll talk to you at another time later on in the show.

[A]

Okay, that sounds great.

[C]

All right. Thank you. Appreciate.

[E]

Yeah, I got thousands of questions because I'd just love it if my husband came home and posed that question to me. What if we just, you know, sex with other people?

[C]

Because to me, that means that you're right. You're not happy in that part of your relationship. Right. Because if you want to go get it elsewhere. Right. Yeah.

[E]

Some people don't feel that way.

[D]

Some people can separate it, but it's just like, I just want to know how the conversation progresses, who brings it up? Because, like, I like. It's just fascinating.

[C]

We're gonna call this Burch listener Kathy. She's on the voice disguiser also. Good morning, Kathy.

[A]

Good morning.

[C]

Hi. How are you?

[A]

I'm fine, thank you.

[C]

Tell us about your double life.

[A]

Well, I've been married 24 years to the same man, and I've been involved with another man for the past five. And neither one know anything about each other, nor do our families.

[C]

Whoa, now you've been seeing him for five years?

[A]

Yes, and would want to get married one day. But I'm still married to the same man and I still love both of them.

[E]

Who do you live with?

[A]

I live with the man I'm married to.

[C]

Now. How far has the other relationship progressed? You said one day we're going to get married. Have you guys talked about that?

[A]

Oh, yes, definitely.

[C]

Has he actually proposed to you?

[A]

Yes.

[C]

What have you said?

[A]

Not until I can get divorced or we figure out what we're doing in our lives.

[E]

So the guy for five years, he knows about that you're married?

[A]

Yes.

[C]

He does know.

[A]

Yes.

[C]

And the guy that you're married to, I always wonder, you know, like when we come out of these relationships and they come clean finally, that how could a guy not know that you're having an affair for five years? You know.

[A]

He just has no idea.

[C]

No clue. He doesn't ask where you are during the day. At night, when he's not around, he's always working. Does he live in Atlanta?

[A]

He's in the metro Atlanta area. Okay.

[C]

Wow. And he has no idea that this other life is going on?

[A]

Had no idea.

[E]

How does the double life make you feel?

[A]

Scared, confused, don't know which way to go?

[E]

Does guilty come up anywhere in there?

[A]

Yes. It does. It's hard because I didn't mean to fall in love with another man and I didn't want to, but it's happened.

[C]

What?

[A]

Jenna, Jen just threw her hands and that's the hard part.

[C]

Well, you still, what, Love your husband?

[A]

Yeah, I do. I've been with him 20. It's almost 24 years.

[E]

I don't think that you can say that you love someone that you've been cheating on for five years. And when we ask you how you feel about it, your first word isn't guilty.

[A]

Well, tell me this. If you've been married to this man for a long, long time, how could you not love him?

[D]

What's a long, long time?

[E]

23 years.

[C]

23 years, man.

[A]

Yes.

[C]

Well, I would.

[A]

You can't just stop loving him.

[C]

Well, I would turn that question around and I would say, how could you do that to a man that you've been Married to for 23 years if you love him?

[A]

You know, I don't know, but it's hard because I didn't want to fall in love with someone else. But when you meet someone that just really, really blows you away and, you know, the more you see him, the more you really like them a lot, and the longer it carries on, the more you love that person too.

[C]

Why don't you just bail on the husband?

[A]

I don't know. I've got his eight year old child. Has a lot to do with it. And I don't know, I just think.

[E]

That'S a decision you made. Somewhere at some point, you made a decision to continue with the feelings you were having for the five year guy. You know, at one point you, you had to look that decision in the face and said, I'm either gonna go for it or I'm not. And the responsible decision, obviously would have been like, no, I'm not. I'm gonna stay faithful in my marriage. Which people make that decision every day, and they make the right decision every day. But you decided to make the decision to continue with it so that you did fall in love with this person, but there was a decision made. You didn't just happen to fall in love with someone.

[A]

Well, you've never met someone that just makes you fall in love with him as soon as you meet him. I mean, you just love everything about him.

[C]

Well, I think she's tempted by me every day. But we keep our distance because we know it's not good for either one of us.

[B]

Right?

[D]

Okay. That's gonna make you smile today then.

[C]

Okay, I gotta move on to Another call here. And good morning. We are gonna call you. Jay. You are on the voice disguiser also.

[A]

Okay, thank you.

[C]

You're living a double life.

[A]

Yes, I am.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

I'm a student in school and my parents are pretty lucky. They gave me a lot of money.

[C]

I gotta stop you there, Jay. Cause you gotta speak up a little bit. We're having a tough time hearing you. So can you start all over again?

[A]

Can you hear me now?

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Okay. I'm a student in school and my parents are pretty lucky. They give me a good amount of money every month because they're well off. So they give me some spending money, but I'm actually making money on my own. I'm a part of a male escort service. And I just. There was a period of time where I didn't really want their money. I had a lot of problems with them. And my friend just kind of suggested it. And so I made quite a bit. But once things patched up with my parents and stuff, I just couldn't. I couldn't really come to give it.

[C]

Up for whatever reason. Are you having a tough time understanding what she's saying?

[E]

You just sound like you're kind of mumbling and quickly talking through your words added onto the voices. Kaiser, it's really hard to understand what you're saying. But is the gist of it that you run an escort service? You work for an escort service, but.

[A]

Out of one, you're part of an.

[E]

Escort of an escort service.

[C]

And she's also a student taking money from her parents.

[E]

So your parents don't know that you're an escort?

[A]

No, no, no. Nobody knows. Actually.

[C]

Can you pitch that voice disguise or something?

[D]

It's as low as it'll go.

[C]

It's as low as it'll go.

[E]

I just think it's cause she talks quickly.

[C]

I gotcha. Hey, Jay, can I ask you what school you attend?

[A]

I'd rather not say. Is that okay?

[C]

You don't want to say okay? It's college, right?

[A]

Yes.

[C]

Okay.

[E]

Okay.

[C]

All right. So you're taking money from your parents and you're also part of this escort service. Now this actually came up earlier in the show today because I was always under the quote, unquote assumption that an escort service is just a service where like, really rich guys come into town and they don't want to be lonely for the night and they've got a business meeting. So they call the escort service and some hottie comes by and they hang out all night. Is that what an escort service is or is an Escort service. Just a pretty way of saying I sleep with these guys and I get money for sleeping with them.

[A]

It's a mix of both.

[E]

I think. Isn't an escort service like a higher class way to say?

[A]

Yeah, yeah, it is. Usually like more upper class businessmen type of thing.

[E]

So you're getting a lot of money to sleep with someone rather than just a little bit of money.

[C]

Give us a little clue about how much money you'd get in any given night.

[A]

I'm not supposed to go into specifics about that, but I could do without any assistance and I could pay off all my tuition, all my bills, all my apartment needs and still have plenty of spending money.

[C]

In one night?

[A]

In a week?

[C]

In a week. Okay, go ahead.

[E]

Can we talk to her later? Because I'm feeling uncomfortable with the questions. I want to ask her before 8:30. But I am dying to ask her like a thousand questions. Even more so than the open mirror lady.

[C]

Are you available after like 8:30 today or tomorrow? Okay, cool. Then we'll talk to you more about this because. Yeah, I've got some questions too. Like, are there different things for different cash? Right. Where you're going with this?

[A]

Right.

[E]

How you get started, what the first time was, like, what, you know, what makes you feel like it's okay? Because. Yeah, I mean, there's like a thousand questions.

[C]

Do they call you directly?

[E]

What happened, the whole deal? And how you're recruited to start.

[C]

Staying away from those kind of like sexual questions until after 8:30. How. What do your parents think that you do to make a living?

[A]

They don't think I have any job of any sort.

[D]

Which is why they keep giving you money?

[A]

Yeah, I mean, they're well off anyway, so I think they would as it is. But they don't. They don't. They're very controlling. They'd rather me not work.

[C]

So on any given Friday, Saturday night, they think you're at fraternity parties.

[A]

Yeah, I live in an apartment near my campus, so they don't really ask questions about where I go and things.

[C]

Wow. They have no. And now nobody else in your life knows either? No. Friends know?

[A]

Well, there was one friend who suggested it because I guess she knew somebody that was like, you know, associated with it. And through that I kind of went on from there. But she knows that I have. I think she knows that I'm a part of it. I don't think she knows like the extent or any of the details type of thing. Wow.

[C]

Yeah.

[E]

Wow.

[C]

Do you ever think, like, I think the guilt would overtake me so much like if my mom ever found out or as a woman, if my dad ever found out.

[A]

Yeah. I mean, yeah, I like a lot of issues with it, but at the same time, like, you know, it's not like I like what I do. It's more that it's. I really do get a lot of money and I like the fact that I don't have to use my parents money because it gives me a little more independence from them.

[E]

Do you think you'll ever pay your parents back with some of that money?

[A]

I don't think they're expecting it. I don't think they need my money, really. They're pretty fine off without it.

[C]

How much money do you have saved right now from what you've made as being an escort?

[A]

Oh, thousands and thousands. I don't. Like I said, I don't really want to go into specifics. I actually probably don't know.

[E]

It is a lot.

[A]

I've lost track. Actually. That's more of a way to say it. But it's definitely in the high thousands.

[C]

In the tens of thousands.

[A]

So we're talking higher than that?

[C]

Higher than that, yeah. And this is all cash just in your apartment or is this something you have in a bank account?

[A]

Yeah, I have it in an account.

[C]

In the 30s and the 40s.

[A]

Yeah. Around there, yeah.

[C]

Wow. Wow. Busy, busy, busy. You must be tired. All that studying and all that escorting.

[A]

I don't actually. I don't even need to do that many per week.

[D]

How are your grades?

[A]

They're good.

[D]

Good.

[C]

A's and B's.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Really?

[E]

Can you tell us what you're studying?

[A]

I am a business major.

[C]

Business model. Well, yeah, obviously passed. Well done, Jay. You know what I want to do is I want to put you on hold because I think we're all fascinated by this and there are a million more graph questions we want to ask you, but we can't do that till after 8:30.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

All right, I'll put you on hold. Okay.

[A]

All right, thanks.

[C]

Cool.

[D]

The Bird Show.

[E]

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[A]

Work from a chalet?

[E]

If you haven't seen your college besties since, well, college. You need a week to fully catch.

[A]

Up in a snowy cabin.

[E]

And if you have to stay in a remote place with your in laws, you should save over 200.

[C]

$200 a week.

[A]

That's the least we can do.

[E]

So you might as well start digging out the long johns because saving over $200 on a week long Snowcation rental is in the cards book [e-mail] January is the perfect time to pause, reset and rethink what you're sipping.

[A]

Ritual Zero Proof delivers the taste, aroma.

[E]

And bite of real spirits without the alcohol. Whiskey for a Sour gin for a.

[A]

G and T agave for a Martin Margarita.

[E]

There's a zero proof option for every cocktail.

[A]

A simple one to one swap makes it easy to mix, enjoy and keep your goals on track.

[E]

This January, choose more More flavor, more cocktails, more moments.

[C]

Ditch the rules, keep the ritual.

[E]

Find yours at ritual.0proof.com hey, it's Raj and Noah, and we're back with a new season of Am I Doing It Wrong? The show that explores the all too human anxieties we have about trying to get our lives right.

[A]

Because we're still doing a lot of stuff wrong.

[E]

But who isn't? That's why each week we're talking about the topics that we could all use a little helping hit with. Whether it's making new friends as an adult, managing our emotions, or even dreaming.

[A]

We'Ll be talking to experts in their fields who are definitely doing things right so the rest of us can be.

[D]

A bit wiser and a lot better.

[E]

Equipped to handle whatever life throws at us. Subscribe now and listen to new episodes of Am I Doing It Wrong? Dropping every Thursday starting January 1st, wherever you get your podcasts.

[C]

And for the first time ever, we're.

[A]

Going to have full video episodes on YouTube. Because as long as there are things to get wrong, we're going to be right here to help you do them better.

[C]

Love you.