Bert (2:05)

So we're asking you what has your ex boyfriend kind of held for ransom in order to keep the relationship going? Good morning, Penny. You're on all the hits. Q100.

Melissa (2:15)

It wasn't. It wasn't an ex boyfriend. It was my ex wife. Yes. We had a commitment ceremony. We bought a. We purchased a boat together, and it was a $47,000 boat, and it's somewhere up in Lake Allatoona. And she told me that if I don't go back out with her and have dinner with her after four years, that. Yeah. That I can just. I'll never find the boat.

Bert (2:41)

Yeah, that's. That's serious ransom. That's like leaving you, like, pictures of her on the boat and all these different lakes going, here's where we are now. You'll never see this boat again. See me again.

Melissa (2:52)

It was a bad relationship anyways.

Erica (2:54)

But of course, because now it's over.

Melissa (2:56)

Melissa, I want to tell you, I flew all the way to. To New York to see Bette Miller. Oh, she was awesome.

Erica (3:03)

I can't wait.

Melissa (3:04)

Awesome concert. And Bert. Don't say that. It's that, you know, the old stuff. No, she. She's a. She's kick.

Erica (3:11)

Let me tell you.

Bert (3:12)

She's kick.

Erica (3:13)

Let me tell you what Bert said.

Melissa (3:14)

Can I say kick ass.

Bert (3:16)

Oh, yeah.

Erica (3:17)

Let me tell you what Bert said. Off air. He gave. He put her just one step above. Just one step above Celine Dion.

Bert (3:23)

Somewhere wedged between.

Zoe (3:24)

If.

Bert (3:25)

If Barbra Streisand and Celine Dion had a child, it would be Bette Midler.

Erica (3:31)

Than both of them.

Bert (3:32)

Sorry, I just don't see it. Is the bat middle draw a gay thing?

Erica (3:36)

No, I mean, I. It's a talent thing for me if. A lot of gay people there. A lot of gay people are there.

Bert (3:40)

But I mean, does she have the same following that Cher does in the gay community?

Erica (3:43)

I'll find out Sunday night.

Bert (3:44)

Okay.

Melissa (3:45)

I think she does. Yeah. All right, guys. You take care.

Bert (3:48)

You too.

Melissa (3:48)

All right. Bye. Bye.

Bert (3:49)

Bye. Bye. Hey, Melissa, if you can find this woman's ex girlfriend or wife or whatever and get yourself a boat, she'll sell it to you. Chief. I'm just throwing it out there. Morning, Erica. You're on all the hits. Q100.

Melissa (4:01)

Well, I just recently broke it off with an ex boyfriend of mine, two years, and he has decided that if he can't be with me, then he's gonna leave the country.

Erica (4:13)

Okay.

Melissa (4:14)

And just.

Bert (4:14)

Totally. Yeah. So what do you have to lose.

Melissa (4:16)

Yeah, that's bad news because.

Melissa (4:20)

Well, I guess, you know, now I have the reputation of having someone leave the country, not come back.

Bert (4:26)

Oh, I think that's bragging rights more than anything else. He was so in love with me. He could not only be in the same city, the same state, this man had to flee the country.

Erica (4:34)

Oh, if somebody was upset over me and left Atlanta, I mean, come on, am I going to be upset?

Bert (4:39)

That's a bad negotiation on the guy's part. He wasn't thinking very well there. You don't get back with me, I'm going to. I am going to move as far away from you as possible.

Melissa (4:47)

Okay, well, he pretended that he left four days ago. I'm talking to him online. Ten minutes later, walks through my front door.

Erica (4:56)

Oh, no.

Melissa (4:57)

He pretended he left to say, well, maybe, you know, she's going to come back to me, all this kind of stuff. Well, no, no, no. He's really leaving tomorrow.

Bert (5:06)

Oh, my God.

Melissa (5:08)

For real leaving tomorrow?

Bert (5:11)

Let me get this whole thing straight. You and he break up, he makes the stupid negotiation of threatening you that because the breakup was so bad that if you don't get back together, he's gonna move really far away from you. And then when you say, I'm sorry, it's just not gonna work out. He thinks somehow that if he's talking to you online that you're gonna come around and he walks through your door thinking you've changed your mind in four days.

Melissa (5:37)

Well, yeah. He expected me to be, like, fall into his arms, like, oh, God, you know, thank God you're here and you didn't leave. You know, Something like that.

Erica (5:46)

It's amazing how fast people lose their cool when they get dumped. You know, it's just amazing how they think that. Yeah. That in four days, all of a sudden, she's gonna come to her senses and decide she wants to be with him the rest of her life.

Bert (5:59)

This dude is pathetic.

Melissa (6:00)

Oh, no, no, no. I got proposed to two days ago.

Bert (6:03)

Same dude.

Melissa (6:04)

Yeah. I decided, you know, he came back. Okay. You know, we can. We can do this. We can, you know, go see a movie, hang out, you know, just as friends. No, no, no, no, no. We get back and I'm trying to leave because I figured, okay, that's it, you know, gotta go home. Gotta, gotta, you know, calm down. And he's proposing to me.

Bert (6:23)

Let me tell you about the two kinds of friends that guys have. They have sex partners and potential sex partners, so there's no just being friends with him.

Erica (6:33)

Yeah, that's a whole other topic.

Bert (6:35)

Wow, it really is. All right, thank you for calling.

Melissa (6:38)

Thank you.

Bert (6:38)

Bye. Bye. Morning. All the hits.

Erica (6:41)

What I was gonna say, since this topic is ransom. Now, if he had taken something of hers outside of the country with them, that would have been smarter for her to contact him. But he didn't even do that.

Bert (6:49)

Morning.

Melissa (6:50)

My cousin and his girlfriend broke up and she had this dog that she just. The dog loved her and she loved the dog. So out of vengeance and trying to keep her, he thought he'd take the dog and hold it.

Bert (7:00)

Yeah, you hear this kind of like in marriages all the time that break up. Like in the divorce papers in the settlement. Like he'll keep the dog or she'll keep the dog that, that she knows that he loves so much just to be spiteful. All about it.

Melissa (7:13)

Well, then he tried to give her back the dog at the time and she went and bought another dog. So he got stuck with the dog.

Bert (7:20)

Serves him right.

Erica (7:21)

It was probably like one of those.

Bert (7:23)

Poodles that's, you know.

Bert (7:28)

It'S a dog that he has no business being seen in public.

Zoe (7:30)

Right.

Bert (7:31)

Good morning, John.

Melissa (7:32)

Hey, I got solution for your friend with a ticket.

Zoe (7:35)

Okay.

Bert (7:35)

Why doesn't.

Melissa (7:36)

Why don't you have her meet her ex for a light bite before the show, but bring her own date with her.

Bert (7:43)

Oh.

Bert (7:46)

That'S good.

Melissa (7:47)

There is no way faster to get through to an ex than to show up with your own date.

Erica (7:52)

Yeah, but is that. Yeah, that's true. But is that fair to the new date though? Like the new dad has to sit there in between the two. Like my suggestion was for her to have meet up, you know, set a meeting with him, but have somebody else show up and get the ticket. Like a friend or something. Show up without her to get the tickets. Cause I don't know, I mean, it's.

Melissa (8:11)

Not a date though. It doesn't have the same sting. And you know, she needs to go on the offensive instead of being defensive about it. You know, that's the only way to get rid of some of these people.

Bert (8:23)

She could do. She could do the smart thing and stay home and carve things into her skin instead of going to see Batman.

Bert (8:30)

All right, Jon. See you later, man.

Zoe (8:33)

Show.

Bert (8:36)

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