The Bert Show – Vault: What Do You Do If Your Friend Is A Social Bomber?

Original Air Date: March 19, 2026
Main Hosts: Bert, Kristin, Abby, Cassie, Tommy & The Bert Show Cast
Main Theme: How to recognize, deal with, or help a “social bomber”—someone who unintentionally kills the vibe or dominates and derails group conversations—for better or (usually) worse.

Episode Overview

This episode of The Bert Show centers around the concept of the "social bomber"—a person who enters a social situation and, either through dominating or derailing conversation, brings the fun and energy to a halt. The hosts and callers share stories, identify the symptoms, and discuss whether there’s any hope for changing or confronting a social bomber, all while riffing with their trademark humor and insight.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. What Is a Social Bomber?

• Definition & Dynamics
  • "A social bomber is a person that...enters and instantly is the buzz kill, starts to dominate the conversation and makes it so difficult for everybody around you that the fun's over at that point."
    — Bert (00:44)
  • Often, this person is a "fringer": not a total outsider, but not really part of the group’s core dynamic (03:13).

2. Example Story: The Whiskey Park Incident

• Memorable Moment
  • The hosts recall a story involving Randy Gerber at a bar opening.
    "And out of nowhere comes this social bomber...He pops right up and it's the three of us talking about Tucson, Arizona, and all of a sudden, boom."
    — Host (01:50)
  • "He has social bomber sense. Randy does." (02:17)
  • Gerber deftly escapes—"A little bit like Keanu Reeves in the Matrix"—while the co-hosts are "stuck in the wake." (02:41)

3. Social Bomber Behavior Traits

• Domination and Disruption
  • "They don't have the skills to hang around the conversation...They just come in and usually completely change the subject." (03:17)
  • "If you're sitting there...talking about how maybe you got some plane troubles...someone jumps in with their own unrelated or self-focused story..." (03:39)
  • "The problem is if you're the social bomber, you don't know you are." (04:08)

4. Caller Stories

• Sean’s Struggle with His Social Bomber Wife (04:20 - 06:15)

  • "I can honestly say my wife is a social bomber...I'll start telling a story and she'll say, 'No, you didn’t. No, you didn’t. This is what happens.'...Now she's trying to call me out on everything I'm saying."
  • Sean goes quiet or walks away, even telling stories to their children undermined by his wife: "It’s gotten so bad...my daughter got all upset and cried about it." (05:33)

• Doug’s Voice-Disguised Confession (07:14 - 08:21)

  • As an educator, Doug dishes on a co-worker:
    "If we're in the lounge, we're talking about something...She comes in...kills everything in every conversation...The kids don't even want to have a conversation with her anymore." (07:16)
  • "Once you're an established social bomber, I don't think your status can ever change." —Bert (08:01)

• Martha: The Self-Aware Social Bomber (08:34 - 10:55)

  • Host: "Martha says she knows she's a social bomber."
  • Martha: "I'm like the spoiled little girl now...all the attention...I just can't help it." (09:22, 09:43)
  • Hosts offer advice:
    • "Take the word 'me' and 'I' out of your vocabulary and then talk about what everybody else...is talking about." (10:00)
    • "Ask questions...then you’re interested in what the person is saying who’s talking." (10:20)

• Tamara’s Social Bomber Son (11:19)

  • "My son...is becoming a social bomber really fast...Everyone wants to walk off and he’s only 13."
  • Host: "There's still time...You have to cut her [grandmother] off immediately...burn the village in a case like this." (11:35-11:43) [jokingly]

Symptoms & Signs of a Social Bomber

• Disjointed Group Dynamics:
  • "If the group's having a conversation and it's immediately silent, you are the social bomber." —Hosts (06:57)
  • "If you walk into a party and everyone breaks up...then you know you're the social bomber." (10:57)
• Unwanted Reaction:
  • "You can feel the energy...just deflate." (06:15)
  • "They generally don't ever pick up on it, that nobody wants to talk to them." (08:21)
• Me-Me-Me Syndrome:
  • "It's like me, me, me, me, me. You become the one upper." (10:20)

Solutions and Can You Change a Social Bomber?

• Awareness is Rare:
  • "A social bomber would never recognize themselves as a social bomber." (06:21)
• Tips for Improvement:
  • "Take the word 'me' and 'I' out of your vocabulary." (10:00)
  • "Ask questions...about what they're talking about and that helps you..." (10:20)
• Realism and Humor:
  • Some feel it’s unchangeable: "Once you're an established social bomber, I don't think your status can ever change." (08:01)
  • The suggestion to assign “homework” to Martha to practice self-awareness. (10:49)

Notable Quotes & Timestamps

• “A social bomber is a person that...enters and instantly is the buzz kill, starts to dominate the conversation...”
  — Bert (00:44)

• “It's like throwing a giant bucket of water on a little fire, because it immediately and instantly smothers the whole thing...”
  — Host (01:12)

• “You can feel the energy in the conversation or the room just deflate.”
  — Bert (06:15)

• “If the group's having a conversation and it's immediately silent, you are the social bomber.”
  — Hosts (06:57)

• "Once you're an established social bomber, I don't think your status can ever change."
  — Bert (08:01)

• “It's better to be a social bomber than a lurker.”
  — Host (09:57)

• “A good thing for social conversations that might help you, Martha, is ask questions...it helps you get into the conversation without seeming like a totally self-centered social work.”
  — Host (10:20)

• “If you come around the corner...the group of people breaks up. Like a football team coming out of the line...then you know, you're the social bomber.”
  — Host (10:57)

Episode Flow & Structure

• 00:44 – Social bomber defined; initial examples
• 01:12 - 03:39 – Classic social bombing incident; “fringer” vs. outsider
• 04:20 - 06:15 – Caller Sean recounts social bomber spouse stories
• 06:15 - 07:04 – Social bombing “symptoms”; how to spot if it’s you
• 07:14 - 08:21 – Doug: workplace social bomber, status never changes
• 08:33 - 10:55 – Martha: self-aware social bomber, hosts offer advice
• 11:19 - 11:43 – Tamara: social bomber son; parents’ influence

Tone and Takeaway

With equal parts empathy and sarcasm, the hosts create a hilarious, relatable dissection of social group mishaps. The takeaway: almost everyone knows a social bomber—and sometimes, with effort, self-awareness, and gentle correction, it’s possible to change. Most of the time, though, it comes down to group survival tactics and good-natured coping.

Useful for anyone curious about group dynamics or eager to avoid becoming the “social bomber” themselves.