Vault: What happens when a man proposes to another man?

Summary

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The Bert Show - Vault: What happens when a man proposes to another man?

Date: July 22, 2026

Episode Overview

This episode of The Bert Show dives into a unique social experiment: comparing public reactions to two different marriage proposals. The show’s crew stages a traditional man-to-woman proposal and a man-to-man proposal in public spots in Kennesaw, Georgia, aiming to observe and discuss the differing responses from onlookers. With trademark humor, honesty, and empathy, the hosts and participants analyze the reactions, share personal insights, and raise questions about societal acceptance and expectations.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Social Experiment Setup

[00:46–01:29]

• Intent: The team wants to capture real-world reactions to public marriage proposals, first between a man and woman, then between two men.

  • "We all know what happens when a man proposes to a woman. Free drinks for everybody... The whole world opens up to you after you get engaged. So we wanted to video a proposal between man and a woman and then... a man asking another man to be their life partner." — Virt Show Host [00:46]

• Execution: Intern Brandon and Frankie, plus friends, are enlisted as pseudo-couples. Their aim is to keep the situations as similar as possible.

• Location: Multiple casual restaurants in Kennesaw are selected: Applebee’s, Chili’s, Bahama Breeze, and Bailey’s.

• Logistical Decisions: The team avoids places with many families, not wanting "to force a family discussion." — Intern Brandon [02:13]

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2. The Man-Woman Proposal at Bahama Breeze

[02:31–05:05]

• Staging: Frankie proposes to his friend Melanie. He borrows the restaurant musician’s mic to broadcast the proposal across the dining area and even the parking lot.
• Immediate Response:
  • "Everybody was clapping, shaking my hand. She was running around, showing everybody the ring... It was amazing. Everybody’s coming up, shaking her hand. Congratulations." — Frankie [04:41]
• Atmosphere: The mood is jubilant, people engage and celebrate, and the "bride-to-be" even shows off her ring to diners.
• Perks: "Did you get a free order of potato skins or anything?"—Commentator. "No, we actually got coconut shrimp." — Frankie [04:53]
• Humor: The crew teases that maybe the friend will expect a real wedding, keeping the tone light and playful.
• Challenge: Frankie shares the nerves of publicly proposing, even as a staged event.

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3. The Man-Man Proposal at Bailey’s

[05:39–08:41]

• Set-Up: With Bailey's packed for "two for Tuesdays" and the Braves game on, Frankie this time proposes to Intern Brandon in front of a large, mostly male crowd.

• Atmosphere Difference: The buildup is tense. Brandon, who is Black, is aware that he’s visible in the local community.

  • "It was packed full of testosterone... I live literally three miles down the road, so I'm seeing people I've seen on campus in the complex." — Intern Brandon [06:44, 06:47]

• Proposal: The moment is performed similarly to the earlier proposal, with Frankie using the mic to ask Brandon to be his life partner.

• Crowd Reaction:

  • "Everything was silent until Melanie started clapping. The looks we got on camera from people... some people were not saying some nice things." — Frankie [07:40]
  • "When we did our proposal thing, dead silent." — Intern Brandon [08:30]

• Host’s Analysis: "We're still not ready for this." — Virt Show Host [09:26]; "I'm not surprised... It's hurtful. It doesn't ever get easier, you know." — Melissa [10:31]

• Memorable Moment: Frankie is later confronted in the men's room: "Some dude told me to F off twice. Just the second time to make sure I heard him... He wouldn’t even look me in the face either." — Frankie [08:48, 08:54]

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4. Reflections & Discussion

[09:14–11:06]

• Is the comparison fair? The hosts discuss whether Bailey's, a sports bar, can be considered a fair test environment compared to Bahama Breeze; however, Melissa argues that the cold response is "exactly what would happen" in many parts of town.
• Differences by Location:
  • "If you did it in Midtown, you're gonna get applause. Of course." — Melissa [09:33]
• Personal Impact:
  • "Of course it’s hurtful. It doesn’t ever get easier, you know." — Melissa [10:31]
• Experiment as Lived Experience: Melissa reminds the team that their "experiment" is a daily reality for many, highlighting the emotional toll of these sorts of public moments for LGBTQ+ people.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On expectations and social license:
  • "We all know what happens when a man proposes to a woman. Free drinks for everybody... The whole world opens up to you after you get engaged." — Virt Show Host [00:46]
• On crowd reaction contrast:
  • "Everybody was clapping, shaking my hand... It was amazing." — Frankie [04:41]
  • "It was completely silenced. You can see it in the video." — Frankie [08:02]
• On personal impact:
  • "Of course it's hurtful... it doesn't ever get easier, you know." — Melissa [10:31]
• On confrontation after the proposal:
  • "Some dude told me to F off twice. Just the second time to make sure I heard him... He wouldn't even look me in the face either." — Frankie [08:48]
• Comic Relief:
  • "Did you get a free order of potato skins or anything?" — Commentator [04:49]
  • "I'm greedy... I asked for his number. Plus me equals three." — Frankie [09:09]
• On location sensitivity:
  • "If you did it in Midtown, you're gonna get applause. Of course." — Melissa [09:33]
• On LGBTQ+ reality:
  • "This is pretty typical. This is my life... Of course it's hurtful. It doesn't ever get easier, you know." — Melissa [10:23, 10:31]

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Important Segment Timestamps

• [00:46] — Introduction of the social experiment concept
• [02:31] — Start of man-woman proposal at Bahama Breeze
• [04:41] — Frankie describes the overwhelmingly positive reactions
• [05:39] — Start of man-man proposal at Bailey’s
• [07:40] — Frankie explains the silence and tension, only broken by their friend
• [08:48] — Frankie recounts receiving hostile verbal abuse after the proposal
• [10:31] — Melissa discusses how painful and normalized lack of acceptance feels
• [09:26, 09:33] — Debate about location and societal readiness

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Summary & Takeaways

The Bert Show’s experiment viscerally exposes how public displays of same-sex love are still met with discomfort or even open hostility, in contrast to the widespread celebration of heterosexual love. Even with humor and resilient camaraderie among the team, there’s an undercurrent of disappointment and hurt.

Key Insights:

• Public reactions to proposals still reveal social norms and prejudice.
• Location matters greatly to the level of acceptance or celebration.
• For LGBTQ+ people, what’s an experiment for some is a lived reality for others.
• Supportive friends can help break silences, but the cultural gap remains stark and painful.

The episode ends with a call for empathy and further curiosity: Would reactions be different in more accepting locations? Regardless, the emotional honesty of the segment resonates deeply.

---

Transcript

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[Virt Show Host]

It's the virt show. So here was sort of the social experiment that we wanted to do. We wanted to send a couple of staff members out, and we wanted to have a public proposal of marriage. We all know what happens when a man proposes to a woman. Free drinks for everybody.

[Supportive Bystander]

Good luck to you.

[Virt Show Host]

Free flights. You're allowed to drive 85 miles an hour. Whole world opens up to you after you get engaged. So we wanted to video a proposal between man and a woman and then compare it. Same situation between a man asking another man to be their life partner and get reactions. So we send intern Brandon and Frankie.

[Frankie]

What's up, guys?

[Brandon]

Frankie.

[Melissa]

Yay.

[Virt Show Host]

And this starts in Kennesaw, right, Brandon?

[Intern Brandon]

Okay. Starts at. In Kennesaw. And Applebee's, I believe, was the first place we went to, the first place we tried.

[Commentator]

Romantic restaurant.

[Melissa]

Well, that's how many proposals happen at Applebee's.

[Supportive Bystander]

Hell yeah.

[Intern Brandon]

I mean, but there was too many families there, so we did.

[Frankie]

Well, there was not. There was not enough people at Applebee's. At Chili's, they were. There were too many families around. And we were like, oh, we don't want to.

[Commentator]

We don't want to expose the kids to the gayness.

[Frankie]

Well, we were all talking about it.

[Commentator]

This is a banner morning for Melissa.

[Virt Show Host]

We don't want to be the one.

[Melissa]

We end up heading to a damn straight wedding this weekend.

[Supportive Bystander]

So I'm having a good day.

[Intern Brandon]

Melissa's defeated.

[Virt Show Host]

Well, you don't even know. You don't know how the reaction was yet.

[Melissa]

So maybe I turned you around.

[Intern Brandon]

We didn't want to be the ones that had to force a family discussion. I mean, we don't.

[Virt Show Host]

That's cool.

[Intern Brandon]

Yeah. So we opted to go to a different place.

[Virt Show Host]

Okay, so you were doing the same proposals in the same place?

[Intern Brandon]

No, we're gonna do.

[Frankie]

We're two different places, but around the same area.

[Virt Show Host]

Okay. Both in Kennesaw.

[Frankie]

Both in Kennesaw.

[Virt Show Host]

All right, so the proposal with man and woman happens first. Set the scene for me here.

[Frankie]

We went to Bahama Breeze and they had a guy up there playing guitar. And so we.

[Commentator]

Is it just me or does Frankie sound baked out of his skull?

[Virt Show Host]

This is a little 420 week for you.

[Frankie]

Yeah.

[Virt Show Host]

421, 422, 420.

[Melissa]

Somebody's been up all night, right?

[Frankie]

Yeah, it's been a long night.

[Melissa]

Okay.

[Frankie]

But I waited and asked her, my friend Melanie and Crystal went with me to videotape it. And I asked Melanie to go to the bathroom. And when she did, I asked the guy who was playing the guitar if he would let me borrow the mic. And I told him I wanted to propose to my girlfriend. I met her here. And so the mic goes throughout the entire restaurant, the parking lot across the street. It was ridiculous. And so I get on the mic and I get everybody's attention. And the way she played it off just made me act even more. The audio is great of her just flipping out. And she did it just like you would expect a woman to flip out. And she went around showing everybody the ring and just. It was awesome. But yeah, we got great.

[Commentator]

Is there a chance she thinks you're really engaged now?

[Virt Show Host]

Yeah. Right.

[Melissa]

Did you tell her this is a bitch?

[Commentator]

She knows it was a joke, right?

[Commentator 2]

No.

[Virt Show Host]

You should call her up today and go, okay, I've got the wedding planner all lined up. Alright, so here's audio of Frankie actually proposing. What else did I want to add to this? I think that's it. Oh, yeah. And the video is gonna. It's already up online or will be up later.

[Commentator]

It will be updated. Edit in the audio for one of them, but it'll be up soon.

[Brandon]

Excuse me, everybody. Can I get your attention for a second, please? I have an announcement to make. Melanie. I've been with her for three years now.

[Commentator 2]

No.

[Brandon]

And I know since the first day that I met you that I wanted

[Frankie]

you to be my wife.

[Supportive Bystander]

Oh, my God. Congratulations. Thank you.

[Virt Show Host]

So pretty standard stuff. Everybody's all excited, right? Like paint the scene for me. Everybody seems to be clapping.

[Frankie]

Oh, everybody was clapping, shaking my hand. She was, you Know, running around, showing everybody the ring, you know, it was. It was amazing. Everybody's coming up, shaking her hand. Congratulations.

[Commentator]

Did you get a free order of potato skins or anything?

[Frankie]

No, we actually got coconut shrimp.

[Brandon]

Okay, good.

[Frankie]

And, you know, I mean, I had to have a couple drinks because it's kind of nerve wracking to get. I've never proposed to anybody before, so it was kind of nerve wracking.

[Commentator 2]

And a practice run for when the run thing happens.

[Frankie]

Right.

[Virt Show Host]

So all goes well, everything's pretty much exactly what you think. All right. Then you move on.

[Frankie]

Yeah. And then dudes were hating all over the restaurant. They were so mad because my friend, she's very attractive. And so she, you know, she's. As soon as we get done so we can get out of there, she's like screaming, check, please. Check, please. You know, acting like we need to go home or whatnot, because you gotta do it, right? Exactly, exactly.

[Brandon]

And we.

[Frankie]

And we walk by these dudes that are giving us, you know, giving me a dirty look, you know. Cause we're engaged now. And she just screams, oh, it's so big. You know, that was so funny. And then we went off to Bailey's.

[Virt Show Host]

Okay. And Bailey's is where we enter intern Brandon.

[Intern Brandon]

Yeah.

[Virt Show Host]

Okay.

[Intern Brandon]

That's where I come in to play at this point. Cause I replace Melanie as Frankie's proposal partner.

[Virt Show Host]

This is pretty much the same situation. Is this on mic or is this.

[Frankie]

Well, again, my friend Melanie knows the manager, so she said, can he get

[Commentator]

Melanie, your ex fiance. Yeah.

[Melissa]

Quick breakup.

[Brandon]

Yes.

[Frankie]

You know, well, you know, I'm greedy. So she tells him if. Or asks him if we can grab the mic and says, I have a proposal, you know, to make.

[Virt Show Host]

And he has no idea that this is going to be man on man proposal.

[Frankie]

And, you know, I asked Brandon to go to the bathroom, too, and he comes and gives me the mic. And then I have to wait until the song ends, give him the high sign, and then I get everybody's attention. And this place is packed.

[Commentator 2]

So not only are how many people in Kennesaw with a packed bar, but they're in it. And you're proposing to a man who is black.

[Frankie]

Yes.

[Melissa]

We did have a black man that took part in this bit.

[Intern Brandon]

It was two for Tuesdays also, so.

[Frankie]

And it was packed full of testosterone.

[Virt Show Host]

It was.

[Frankie]

Yeah.

[Intern Brandon]

Mind you, I live literally three miles down the road, so I'm seeing people I've seen on campus in the complex.

[Virt Show Host]

We had no idea.

[Frankie]

And the more uncomfortable he got, the better I got. Right? It Made me want to do it even more.

[Virt Show Host]

Okay, so let's try to pay attention to the crowd sound of after Frankie proposes here to intern Brandon.

[Brandon]

I've known this man for a couple years. I met him here. I love this man. And today I want you to be my life partner.

[Virt Show Host]

No.

[Melissa]

Okay.

[Virt Show Host]

That wasn't awful.

[Commentator]

That wasn't bad.

[Frankie]

Well, no, no, no, no, no. The, the cheers came from Melanie. Everything was silent until Melanie started clapping. The looks we got on camera from people and I had two friends at the bars who said that some people were not saying some nice things.

[Virt Show Host]

So if Melanie didn't get up and sort of act as the applause meter. Applause person, then it would have been silent.

[Frankie]

Well, without her clapping. And you know, you hear that first.

[Supportive Bystander]

Woo.

[Frankie]

That was Melanie. And then people started going in on it. But other than that, it was completely silenced. You can see it in the video.

[Commentator]

Are you upset that Melanie got over your relationship so quickly?

[Supportive Bystander]

Thank God he's with somebody else.

[Intern Brandon]

This was Tuesday night and they had the Braves on one of the tv and it was right before Jason Haywood hit the game tying home run. And that place.

[Melissa]

Oh my God, you're bringing up sports again.

[Intern Brandon]

No, I'm just saying that place lit up when Hayward hit the home run.

[Commentator 2]

Sure.

[Intern Brandon]

And when we did our proposal thing, dead silent.

[Virt Show Host]

Really?

[Frankie]

You don't have to be embarrassed about it, baby.

[Supportive Bystander]

You know, it's all right.

[Intern Brandon]

Nobody else matters. Just me and you here.

[Supportive Bystander]

Right.

[Tyler Redick]

We

[Virt Show Host]

did say something to you about it though, right?

[Intern Brandon]

I believe they said something, Frankie.

[Frankie]

Yeah. I went into the bathroom about 10 minutes later and some dude told me to F off twice. Just the second time just to make sure I heard him.

[Virt Show Host]

Really?

[Frankie]

Yeah, I was just washing my hands and I heard it and I turned around, I didn't say anything then. He wouldn't even look me in the face either.

[Virt Show Host]

Sort of under his breath, like cowardly.

[Frankie]

No, it wasn't under his breath, was it, Carl?

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[Frankie]

no, it was some dude that was sitting all alone.

[Virt Show Host]

So it's pretty.

[Intern Brandon]

He just wanted on the action.

[Frankie]

Yeah. And you know, I, I, well, so I asked for his number plus me equals three.

[Virt Show Host]

It doesn't sound like it's a really fair comparison though, because, I mean, why not? I don't know. Because it isn't a sports bar. Right.

[Melissa]

And no, I think that's an indication exactly. Of what would happen. Absolutely.

[Virt Show Host]

We're still not ready for this.

[Melissa]

Yes.

[Commentator]

Now, it depends on like, I think if you did it at what's the place next to outright and.

[Melissa]

Well, if you did it in midtown. You're gonna get applause. Of course.

[Intern Brandon]

I volunteered Burt and Jeff to do the next one. Then I got no beef again.

[Melissa]

Burt said no to Jeff the first year. Okay, I got no beef.

[Virt Show Host]

Okay, this is them again proposing to each other.

[Brandon]

I've known this man for a couple years. I met him. His name's Brandon. Everybody say, hi, Brandon. All right. I love this man.

[Virt Show Host]

And tonight, now, at this point, everybody thinks you're going to say that my boy's getting. He's getting married.

[Melissa]

He's getting married.

[Virt Show Host]

This is my guy right here.

[Brandon]

I want you to be my life partner.

[Virt Show Host]

No,

[Brandon]

That.

[Frankie]

That other high pitched scream was Brandon.

[Intern Brandon]

I didn't know it was a joke until afterwards.

[Virt Show Host]

So there really wasn't much there.

[Intern Brandon]

I have no game. So what?

[Melissa]

This is pretty typical. This is my life. I mean, y'.

[Commentator 2]

All.

[Melissa]

Oh, this is fun. It's a bit. Oh, it's an experimentation. This is my life.

[Virt Show Host]

It's not like you weren't there when we were brainstorming it. I mean.

[Melissa]

No, I'm just saying. But you're asking me my reaction. It's like it's. I'm not surprised. I mean, it's. You know, I'm not surprised that somebody would refuse to do it. I'm not surprised that there would be no reaction, you know? Yeah, but of course it's hurtful. It's. It doesn't. I mean, it doesn't ever get easier, you know.

[Commentator 2]

I wonder what the reaction would be if you did it in a more gay friendly part of town. Like if you did it in Midtown at Nikimoto's.

[Melissa]

There'd be cheers.

[Commentator 2]

Would everybody cheer?

[Virt Show Host]

Do you think the stray couple would get less applause?

[Commentator 2]

No, not at all.

[Frankie]

Same.

[Commentator 2]

Yeah, but I don't know.

[Virt Show Host]

I don't know either. Maybe. Well, we gotta do it again, guys.

[Commentator 2]

One more time.

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