Vault: Why do famous men cheat?

Summary

The Bert Show: Vault – Why Do Famous Men Cheat?

Release Date: May 26, 2026
Main Theme:
An exploration into the reasons why powerful or famous men cheat, prompted by high-profile celebrity scandals (such as Tiger Woods), societal attitudes towards infidelity, and gender differences in the experience and perception of cheating. The hosts and callers debate theories from psychological, sociological, and cultural angles, offering real-life anecdotes and opinions.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Media Reports & Introduction to the "Why"

• [01:31] Main Male Commentator introduces an Associated Press piece examining whether “famous men cheat” or if infidelity is linked more broadly to power.
• Examples cited: Tiger Woods’ public admission, politicians, and entertainers facing similar scandals.

2. Psychological Separation & Compartmentalization

• [02:39] Expert/Analyst (from AP story): “Most of these men think about the affair as not having anything to do with their real lives, anything to do with their marriages. It’s just a high opportunity sexual flight.”
• Men in power often compartmentalize sex and emotion, viewing affairs as meaningless physically even in the midst of strong marriages.

3. Power, Opportunity, and Attention

• [03:01] Main Male Commentator reacts, highlighting the anxiety these findings may cause women, suggesting that powerful men may stray regardless of the relationship quality:

  • “Even if your relationship is great with him...what he’s saying is this dude’s going to stray anyway. Right?”

• The hosts agree that attention and opportunity increase with status, making cheating more “accessible.”

• [05:49] Main Male Commentator reflects:

  • “If I had to be totally and completely honest and I had to put a number on it, I would say 80% of the women that I have slept with in my life, I had a chance to sleep with because I was on the radio. You take the radio away? Hell no.”

4. Attraction to Power is Mutual

• [06:26] Expert/Analyst:

  • “The idea of having sex with a famous man for many women is highly erotic and highly attractive… whether that be Kobe Bryant, Tiger Woods, David Letterman, Bill Clinton.”

• Both men and women are “intoxicated” by the dynamic of power: for men, the access; for women, the allure of celebrity.

• [07:26] Female Commentator adds a third layer, suggesting even wives of famous men are drawn to the status:

  • “It’s intoxicating to the wife to say that she landed him in the first place…she was the one, she feels like she wears the crown.”

5. Societal Narratives and Gendered Double Standards

• [10:35] Female Caller criticizes the “men will stray” trope:

  • "It’s very much a social construction…I think as a society, we developed somewhere along the line this idea that men will be men and men will stray. And then we've kind of supported that and it's become like a self-fulfilling prophecy."

• Debate on whether monogamy itself is a social construct and whether social acceptance enables men to cheat.

• [11:44] Female Caller:

  • “…when men have affairs, you know, it’s almost acceptable…it’s almost okay…[but] they can [control themselves] if they choose to.”

• [12:41] Male Commentator 2:

  • “But I do think the women get harsher, far harsher judgment for cheating than a guy does.”

• [12:53] Female Commentator echoes:

  • “It’s assumed that men can emotionally detach and so it doesn’t mean anything, but if a woman does that, it means a tremendous amount.”

• [13:11] Male Commentator 2:

  • “She’ll be called a slut and a whore and all these things. And he’ll just – oh well, boys will be boys.”

6. Responsibility and Self-Awareness in Relationships

• [09:15] Male Commentator 2 challenges the normalization of cheating:
  • “…the guy should take the responsibility to say, you know what? I can’t put a woman in this position…I should be honest with myself and say, you know what? I just want to be a player and I’m going to be a player.”
• Stability at home is often desired by men in power, but doesn’t prevent them from seeking affairs ([09:49]).

7. Real-Life Examples & Listener Participation

• Multiple real and celebrity examples (Tiger Woods, CEOs, athletes) discussed to anchor arguments.

8. Debate: Evolution, Biology, or Choice?

• References to mammals and biology (Ashley Madison website mention, [12:04]) to question if monogamy is “natural.”
• The group ultimately lands on the role of individual choice, societal pressure, and opportunity, rather than inevitability.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Expert/Analyst: “Most of these men think about the affair as not having anything to do with their real lives, anything to do with their marriages. It’s just a high opportunity sexual flight.” [02:39]

• Main Male Commentator: “Now, if you’re a woman and you’re listening to that, that must scare the hell out of you…this dude’s gonna stray anyway…You’ve got no chance.” [03:01]

• Female Commentator (on men’s emotional detachment): “It’s just, you know, about power or ego… I don’t think that Tiger Woods had meaningful relationships with any of these women.” [03:30]

• Main Male Commentator (personal anecdote): “My dad...when I was 21…told me about all the women that he screwed around with on my mom...he said the same thing: what I had with your mother was one thing. Sex was sex. I mean, it was physical and it meant nothing.” [03:39]

• Female Caller: “[Cheating] is very much a social construction… we’ve supported that and it’s become like a self-fulfilling prophecy…men stray because they kind of think it’s expected of them.” [10:36]

• Male Commentator 2: “…if it was anything else, we’d be calling this an epidemic…But for this, we’re analyzing it and justifying it and saying, well, that’s just how it is.” [09:15]

• Female Commentator: “It’s assumed that men can emotionally detach, so it doesn’t mean anything. But if a woman does that, it means a tremendous amount.” [12:53]

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Important Timestamps

• [01:31] – Introduction of Associated Press theory about celebrity and infidelity
• [02:39] – Expert discusses compartmentalization of affairs
• [03:01] – Hosts react, discuss implications for relationships with powerful men
• [05:49] – Main Male Commentator admits opportunity from his own fame
• [06:26] – Analyst: Women also find celebrities erotic, mutual “intoxication” explained
• [07:26] – Third level: Wives benefit from being married to fame
• [09:15] – Male Commentator 2: Responsibility, don’t justify cheating
• [10:36] – Female Caller challenges “men will be men” narrative
• [12:41] – Double standards and harsher judgment for female cheaters

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Conclusion

The episode provides a candid, humorous, and occasionally personal exploration of why powerful men cheat, examining not just the actions of the men involved but also the societal frameworks that excuse, enable, or judge such behavior. The hosts and callers expose the double standards around infidelity, emphasizing the importance of individual responsibility and challenging long-standing cultural narratives. Listeners are left with a nuanced picture: while opportunity and power may create more chances for cheating, neither gender nor status make it inevitable—choice and accountability remain central.

Transcript

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[Caller or Guest]

here.

[Main Male Commentator]

Bircha this is a piece that the Associated Press did on I'm not sure. I can't remember if it's why celebrities cheat or why people cheat on each other. Okay, this is the Associated Press. We can debate this, this theory back and forth.

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He is the scandal du jour Tiger woods, seemingly unflappable on the golf course, admitting to transgressions off the links and not being true to his values. Woods, though, is hardly the first to admit to airing in public life from politicians. The bottom line is this. I've been unfaithful to my wife, to entertainers. My wife Regina, she has been horribly hurt by my behavior and fellow athletes

[Expert or Analyst]

because of

[Female Commentator]

the HIV virus that I have attained, I will have to retire from the Lakers.

[SpinQuest Advertiser]

Woods has joined a long list of powerful men who have strayed. Which begs the question why most of

[Expert or Analyst]

these men think about the affair as not having anything to do with their real lives, anything to do with their marriages. It's just a high opportunity sexual flight.

[SpinQuest Advertiser]

McCarthy says in fact, these men will stray even if they have a strong relationship with their wives. He says for them, it's all a combination of power, ego, and just being male.

[Main Male Commentator]

Now, if you're a woman and you're listening to that, that must scare the hell out of you. What he just said right there, if his theory holds true, is that even if these guys and let's take celebrity out of it, let's just put power in it, or let's put CEO or head of a company or like that, even if your relationship is great with him, what he's saying is this dude's gonna stray anyway, right? You've got no chance.

[Female Commentator]

I do agree, though, with what the report said about it doesn't mean anything

[Main Male Commentator]

to them that it's just sex, that

[Female Commentator]

it's just, you know, about power or ego or whatever it is that it's. I don't think that Tiger woods had meaningful relationships with any of these women.

[Main Male Commentator]

Well, there was a rumor there that. That the first one that he had the affair with for like a year and a half, he was still digging quite a bit, right? But the rest were just sex. But my dad used to, when my dad had the great idea to sit me down when was 21 and tell me about all the women that he screwed around with on my mom, he said the same thing to me, is that what I had with your mother was one thing. Sex was sex. I mean, it was physical and it meant nothing. And I'd come home and I was loving your mom and I was loving my family, but I could have sex with other women. And I just never even put the two together.

[Caller or Guest]

You can't tell that to the woman.

[Main Male Commentator]

You can't tell that to the woman. But there are two different types of guys, and I know both of them. One, some that can do it and some that can't.

[Female Commentator]

I thought most men could, but to the woman. Most men were that way able to separate emotion from the physical, but to

[Caller or Guest]

the woman, it's irrelevant because the woman can't.

[Main Male Commentator]

Right?

[Caller or Guest]

You know what I mean?

[Main Male Commentator]

And how do you explain that to your.

[Caller or Guest]

Most of the time, it's seriously like trying to explain color to a blind person. You know what I mean? Like, you can't like that's just not something that women can understand. So no matter what you do to try to explain it, they'll never go, oh, now I see you've separated the two.

[Main Male Commentator]

So if I'm a woman and I'm listening to this and I'm dating a guy that's in a very powerful position, so I just automatically assume that if I marry this man, I'm either gonna know about the affair or not. But there will be an affair. That's what this dude's saying. I don't know.

[Female Commentator]

I mean, I don't think you can assume that, but I think that I was talking to a friend about this whole Tiger woods situation the other day, and we were saying that women like men in the spotlight.

[Main Male Commentator]

That's power.

[Male Commentator 2]

Yeah.

[Female Commentator]

Regardless of what that spotlight is. So even if it's somebody who's like the preacher at the church who the whole congregation is staring at, he's the center of attention, or whether it's the CEO at the business meeting or whatever it is, because that person is in the limelight. And that also, that means that that person has got success and some sort of authority and some sort of ambition and achievement and all those other things that women think are attractive so they're gonna have more opportunity if they're in the spotlight kind of job in that way. Does that make sense?

[Main Male Commentator]

Sure. And if I had to be totally and completely honest and I had to put a number on it, I would say 80% of the women that I have slept with in my life, I had a chance to sleep with cuz I was on the radio. You take the radio away. You take the radio away? Hell no. Hell no. This McCarthy guy goes on a little bit more.

[Expert or Analyst]

The man says to himself, this has nothing to do with me, my marriage, my regular life. This is something that just occurs, it's compartmentalized. It's not going to have any impact.

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However, he says it's not just men who are to blame.

[Caller or Guest]

Not at all.

[Expert or Analyst]

The idea of having sex with a famous man for many women is highly erotic and highly attractive. Whether that be Kobe Bryant, whether that be Tiger woods, rather that be David Letterman, whether that be Bill Clinton.

[SpinQuest Advertiser]

He says Tiger and his wife can salvage their marriage, but says to do so they should spend some time in therapy and reconnect and rebuild their trust.

[Main Male Commentator]

That's brilliant, but really, meanwhile, I'll keep

[Caller or Guest]

talking like this all the time.

[Main Male Commentator]

That is an old school Associated Press guy right there.

[Caller or Guest]

I'll have a cheeseburger with extra mayo, thank you.

[Main Male Commentator]

But he's what he's saying there, if I'm hearing him right, at least the way I'm interpreting it is, is that it's intoxicating for everybody in the relationship. The guy of power or the celebrity is intoxicated by being able to sleep with as many women as he can. And the women that he's sleeping with know that he's in these relationships and know that he's married. But it's intoxicating for them also to be with a guy that's that powerful.

[Female Commentator]

Agreed. And I would add a third level to that, is that it's intoxicating to the wife to say that she landed him in the first place. Tiger woods was already incredibly famous and in the spotlight when she married him. So she was the one. She feels like she wears the crown of, oh, I landed big time celebrity. Fill in the blank here. And then guess what, that. You know what I'm saying?

[Main Male Commentator]

But it feels so different to me to use the word intoxicating because she fell in love with him. These other women, it's still intoxicating. Well, I guess you could say that about any new relationship if I started dating somebody tomorrow. You started dating somebody a couple of days ago. Those first couple of days, those are always intoxicating.

[Female Commentator]

Of course. But that's what I'm saying is like three levels of it. He's loving the fact that he's got all these women attention. Then the mistresses are loving the fact that they're getting his attention. But the wife also, there was a reason unless they were married before he was ever successful, before he was successful anybody. But I mean, this about any of the famous athletes. I mean, if they knew each other, what was the Real Housewife of Atlanta that was married when they were in. They were like boyfriend and girlfriend when they were in, like, high school and college. And then she married the NBA guy. Which one was that? It was on the first Real Housewives of Atlanta.

[Main Male Commentator]

She married to Eric Snell or something like that?

[Male Commentator 2]

Yes.

[Female Commentator]

But weren't they married, like, and together before any of that success or any of that kind of stuff started? So to me, that's different. But still, I feel like the wife is getting something intoxicating out of it because he's already big time.

[Main Male Commentator]

This comes back to the talks that we had about Justin Timberlake and all these guys that get in these relationships, these committed relationships. At 23, 24 years old, they're already a list celebrities traveling all over the world. If you're a woman and you're in a relationship With a guy like that, you have to assume that's not gonna last. Right.

[Female Caller]

Well.

[Female Commentator]

And I think.

[Main Male Commentator]

And if you're a guy, you have to say to yourself somewhere, I don't need to be in a relationship.

[Male Commentator 2]

Yeah. Cause I, you know, my only thing is that I think that we, you know, we're analyzing. If it was anything else, we'd be calling this an epidemic. You know, the fact that all these guys are cheating, like everybody that you put down there, who is cheating. Anything else, we'd call an epidemic. But for this, we're. We're analyzing it and justifying it and saying, well, that's just how it is. Where I do think that, yes, the guy should take the responsibility to say, you know what? I can't put a woman in this position. I cannot get married and I cannot be in a serious relation. It's the guy's responsibility to be able to say to himself and be honest with himself and say, you know what? I just want to be a player and I'm going to be a player.

[Main Male Commentator]

And I think what plays into that is that they do have this kind of power all around the world, and they can really get what they want. And I think that they're looking for one piece of stability, and that piece of stability is a home life. And as much as they love being out on the road and having sex with, In Tiger's case, 11 women, he loves coming home and having the stability of having her there and the kids there. He wanted it all.

[Male Commentator 2]

Yeah, but you've disrespected your home. You know, you disrespected that stability by continuing doing the stuff on the road.

[Female Commentator]

Well, and I would say there are young marriages that work really well. I mean, the entire roster of the braves is like 22 and married. Right. I mean, aren't they all really young?

[Main Male Commentator]

Yeah. Fools. Yeah. I told Frank, or I tried telling Matt Ryan, break up. They don't listen to me. Hey, Julie, good Morning. You're on Q100.

[Female Caller]

Good morning.

[Main Male Commentator]

Hi.

[Female Caller]

I just wanted to comment on this idea that men are meant to stray or men are expected to stray. It's just something that annoys me to no end because in my opinion, I think it's very much a social construction. I think as a society, we developed somewhere along the line this idea that men will be men and men will spray. Men will stray. And then we've kind of supported that and it's become like a self fulfilling prophecy that we expect men to stray. So men stray because they kind of think it's expected of them, or they at least think it's acceptable.

[Female Commentator]

I definitely understand your idea of a social construct, but I think the social construct is monogamy. Not necessarily. This whole theme of men will stray

[Main Male Commentator]

type of thing, expanding.

[Female Commentator]

Well, that's it. I mean, monogamy, sort of a development, you know, I don't know, through cultures and through time and all that kind of stuff that. I think that's a social construct in and of itself.

[Female Caller]

Yes, absolutely. I agree with that. I mean, and it's obviously the most preferred form of marriage in America. But the point is, like, for me, I often hear that when men have affairs, you know, it's almost acceptable. It's almost okay.

[Male Commentator 2]

Or compared to a woman.

[Female Caller]

Compared to a woman. So it's kind of this idea that we have as a society that men just can't control themselves. And that really frustrates me. Because they can if they choose to.

[Female Commentator]

Absolutely.

[Main Male Commentator]

I still really. I mean, remember that dude we had on a couple of weeks ago from. What was that website where married people could try to.

[Caller or Guest]

Ashley Madison.

[Main Male Commentator]

Ashley Madison, right. And he came here so strong on, you know, basically talking about how we are mammals and we truly are the only mammals that are with one. Are supposed to be with one partner our entire lives. And maybe that does play something into it.

[Female Commentator]

I think it does. I mean, I think it definitely does. But I also would warn these famous men who are off running around with their affairs or whatever. Like, your wife's got a trainer and a pool boy and whatever else. And if you're not taking care of business at home, she definitely is. You know, I would say that to both people in the couple. If you're not. If you're married and you're not having sex, and we talked about this all the time, somebody's having sex with somebody else.

[Male Commentator 2]

But I do think the women get harsher, far harsher judgment for cheating than a guy does.

[Main Male Commentator]

You think so?

[Female Commentator]

Because of that. Because of that thing we first started talking about is the emotional detachment.

[Caller or Guest]

Right.

[Female Commentator]

Like, it's assumed that men can emotionally detach. And so it doesn't mean anything, but if a woman does that, it means a tremendous amount. Right.

[Caller or Guest]

And then there's this separate.

[Female Commentator]

So.

[Caller or Guest]

And the acceptance that, well, men are just bred to do that.

[Female Commentator]

Yeah.

[Male Commentator 2]

Boys be boys.

[Caller or Guest]

He couldn't help it.

[Main Male Commentator]

And women were pushed into it.

[Caller or Guest]

Yes.

[Main Male Commentator]

Like, he just wasn't meeting her needs. And that's why she went, well, she'll

[Male Commentator 2]

be called a slut and a whore and all these things. And he'll just. Oh, well, boys will be boys.

[Main Male Commentator]

Well, I think plenty of people calling Tiger Woods a slut and a whore right now.

[Male Commentator 2]

I haven't heard it.

[Main Male Commentator]

He's a slut and a Now you have get it the Bird Show

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