Vault: Women snoring a turnoff

Summary

The Bert Show – Vault: Women Snoring a Turnoff

Date: June 26, 2026
Hosts & Cast: Bert, Kristin, Abby, Cassie, Tommy & the Bert Show Cast
Main Theme:
This episode dives into the social taboos, double standards, personal anecdotes, and emotional hang-ups around women who snore—and whether it’s a “turnoff” in dating and relationships. Listeners, hosts, and callers weigh in on experiences, solutions, and the emotional fallout of being labeled a snorer—especially for women.

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Episode Overview

• The team explores the “embarrassment” and relationship impact of women snoring, a topic usually associated with men.
• Listeners and sleep experts call in with stories, science, and sympathy.
• The cast discusses double standards and possible solutions (from nose strips to surgery), and some have fun brainstorming snoring-related business ideas.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Personal Revelations about Snoring

• Wendy’s Story: Wendy describes discovering she snores after a friend tells her post-sleepover. She’s mortified and recounts childhood trauma from her father’s loud snoring.

  • “Maybe I need to do an experiment during the week and record myself, because I don’t think I’m a snorer. I think it’s just on those occasions, like when you’re sick or you had a long night out, that I snore.” (02:32 — Wendy)
  • Anxiety about being “unattractive” because of snoring surfaces often.

• Host Admissions: Both male and female hosts admit to snoring during illness or after drinking, highlighting the universality of the problem.

  • “When I am sick, especially when I’m plugged, I sound like a bear getting attacked.” (01:47 — Bert)

2. Social Stigma and Double Standards

• Is snoring a relationship dealbreaker?

  • The group debates whether women would avoid relationships because they snore, or whether men would really care if a woman snores.
  • “Do you think there are women who...have not entered into a relationship with a man because they know they snore?” (03:00 — Bert)
  • Callers and hosts agree there’s a gendered double standard.
  • “Jen Hobby actually said that she would never date a guy who snored.” (03:10 — Kristin)
  • “No woman snores.” (03:15 — Bert, in jest)
  • The cast laughs about associating snoring with men but admits women snore too, often less loudly but just as socially embarrassing.

• Relationship Impact Stories:

  • Listeners confess to staying single due to snoring anxieties or to sleeping in separate rooms.
  • “I purposely stay out of relationships...once I find out that they’re light sleepers or that snoring actually bothers them.” (09:02 — Caller, Theresa)
  • “He snores so bad. The last 18 months, we’ve never slept together again.” (10:47 — Caller, Trisha)

3. Solutions and Medical Perspectives

• Nose Strips & Medical Help:

  • Callers recommend remedies like “breathe strips” and mention adenoid surgery, sleep apnea, and the reality that not all solutions work for everyone.
  • “Man, I don’t know how I ever slept without it. My wife snored so bad. Put those (Breathe Right strips) on, she sleeps like a baby.” (05:40 — Caller, Brandon)
  • Expert Input: Sleep center employees call in, clarifying that snoring isn’t just a “male” or “nose-only” issue and sometimes is linked to sleep apnea or throat issues.
    • “I work in a sleep center...I’ve had women that snore 10 times worse than men.” (07:31 — Stephanie, sleep center employee)
    • “Snoring doesn’t always come through your nose. It comes through your throat.” (09:44 — Lisa, sleep center employee)

• Addressing the Embarrassment:

  • Hosts joke about “sexy” or inconspicuous nose strips as a solution to the cosmetic embarrassment of wearing them in front of new partners.
  • “Maybe they make those strips a little in pink or something cute or clear like nude color so they match your skin color.” (11:36 — Wendy)

4. Emotional Fallout & Memorable Anecdotes

• Personal Insults:

  • A caller shares her sister’s painful encounter:
    • “...the next morning [he] told her, hey, do you know that you snore like a bull elephant?...it kind of scarred her for life...never felt sexy again.” (08:13 — Caller)

• Acceptance vs. Avoidance:

  • Some resign to separate sleeping arrangements; others consider surgery or simply avoid relationships.

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Notable Quotes & Moments with Timestamps

• On people not knowing they snore:
  • “People who snore have no idea that they do.” (02:10 — Bert)
• On snoring being a turnoff or a dealbreaker:
  • “If it comes to be known that I’m a snorer, I will buy snore strips. I will go get a surgery done.” (04:31 — Wendy)
• On possible solutions:
  • “What is the bigger turnoff? The snoring.” (06:19 — Brandon, on women wearing breathe strips vs. snoring)
• On gender double standards:
  • “Isn’t there a little bit of a double standard going on here?...” (06:35 — Kristin)
• On snoring and relationships:
  • “The last 18 months, we’ve never slept together again.” (10:49 — Trisha)
  • “I purposely stay out of relationships...I find out that [snoring] bothers them.” (09:02 — Theresa)
• Joking business idea:
  • “Sexy Breathe Right Strips. That’s Wendy’s claim to fame.” (11:40 — Bert)

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• 00:45–03:15 — Hosts’ personal snoring confessions & discovery anecdotes
• 03:16–04:59 — Discussion about snoring as a turnoff, gender assumptions, and the impact of alcohol/sickness
• 05:02–06:24 — Call-ins from listeners and partners of snorers: solutions and tolerance
• 06:35–07:18 — Double standards and gender differences in perception
• 07:24–09:39 — Sleep center expert insights; women snoring worse than men; emotional effects
• 09:42–11:05 — More expert and listener calls; medical causes and solutions; relationship sacrifices
• 11:12–11:49 — Joking business idea for cosmetic nose strips; wrap-up of main convo

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Conclusion

This episode brings humor, vulnerability, and a candid look at a common but rarely-discussed issue—women snoring—and its impact on dating and relationships. With stories, expert advice, and solutions ranging from medical interventions to cosmetic fixes, the cast and callers explore the emotional and social sides of snoring, while poking holes in tired double standards. The takeaway: snoring is human, and whether you’re mortified or pragmatic, there’s support (and probably a market for nude-colored nose strips).

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Transcript

[A]

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[D]

Listen, it's the vert show. Until then, though, we're going to talk about the fact that Wendy snores.

[B]

I don't really know if I do or not.

[D]

You do?

[B]

Well, no. Well, that was because I was. I was your studio, and I passed out on the couch because it was a long night before because I didn't get much sleep. I wasn't feeling well. Ended up having a huge sinus infection because went to the doctor after I left here, but I was on the couch and had to be on antibiotics.

[E]

Jeff, why are you being so mean?

[B]

Jeff was so sweet and trusting and caring in this nest of comfort that we work in, our father figure on

[E]

the show, Jeff Dollar.

[D]

Yeah.

[B]

He decided to figure. He decided to record it and play it on the air, which sounded really sexy. Got me a lot of dates. But no. A couple of weekends ago, we went out. Went out with a girlfriend of mine and came back over to her place and crashed out. Spent the night. The next morning, wake up, she was like, girl, you were snoring bad. And I was like, what? Cause I at this point, didn't realize that I snored.

[E]

I thought, you don't know if. Nobody knows if they snore unless somebody else tells them.

[B]

I think I'm a peaceful sleeper at night. I don't.

[D]

The weirdest thing about snoring, because I haven't slept downstairs in our master bedroom with Jessica since getting back from Burt's Big Adventure. Because I know that when I am sick, especially when I'm plugged, I sound like a bear getting attacked. Like, I am not.

[E]

Oh, is anybody recording you snoring now?

[F]

She has.

[E]

Oh, she has. Cause we need to play that to be fair.

[D]

And so I don't even subject it to that because she's not a super sound sleeper. But the thing is, when that happens. She wakes me up and I fight her because for me, everything was fine. If there's that much noise in a room to wake someone up, I should be hearing it. But people who snore have no idea that they do.

[E]

Right.

[B]

Well, that night, I was spending the night with my friend. We had been drinking, and I think when you drink, your nasal passages get clogged up anyway. So I think that drinking had something to do with it. So maybe I need to do an experiment during the week and record myself because I don't think I'm a snorer. I think it's just on those occasions, like when you're sick or you had a long night out that I snore. But I don't. Oh, God, I hope I'm not a snorer because I got so annoyed with my dad growing up because that's all he did was snore. And I could not sleep to save my life because he was snoring.

[D]

Do you think there are women who are listening to this show who do not. Who have not entered into a relationship with a man because they know they snore?

[E]

Yes. Jen Hobby actually said that she would never date a guy who snored.

[D]

No.

[E]

Is that what you're talking about?

[D]

No woman snores.

[E]

Oh, yeah. You know what? Because I think you always associate snoring with men because it's usually lateral with men. I don't know very many women because both my mother and father snore. My father was the all the neighbors could hear him snoring guy. Mom was the very. Yeah, it was always the little, you know, just a little. Little dainty snore, but still something. She still makes noise, you know. Sorry.

[B]

Are you okay?

[E]

She collapsed the sinus.

[D]

If you're going to record yourself, I think you. I mean, in order to be fair, you have to do it when you're healthy. Yeah, but I do. I do think it's important to do it after you've had a couple drinks because you. You want to try to recreate the scenario where you would end up at a guy's house, because that would be your big concern. Right.

[E]

So what you're saying is a woman who's not entered a relationship because she's afraid that she snores, she's going to turn the guy off.

[D]

She knows that she snores, so she puts off whatever she does.

[E]

So, Wendy, you can never date again.

[B]

I know. I don't even want to go over to a guy's house and just like, you know, like, maybe fall asleep, like, nap style and just fall asleep on the couch and end up. And he's just hanging out. He's like, huh? I'm not going to call this girl back.

[D]

I have to tell you, I do think it would be. I mean, I would like to encourage you and say it's no big deal, but I do think it would be

[E]

a deal breaker for you if a woman snores.

[D]

It'd be weird.

[E]

Really?

[B]

It is weird. Like, I. Like, if it comes to be known that I'm a snorer, I will buy snore strips. I will go get a surgery done.

[E]

You can't help it.

[B]

Nobody can get, like. Can you get a nose job or, like, sinus clothes cleaning out?

[E]

Well, they scrape, like the. For the snore things.

[D]

Okay. Scrape is not a word that we're going to use on the show.

[E]

That's a word. That's a word that's used in the procedure. So I don't think that's. I mean.

[B]

Well, I'll go have my sinus scraped if that. If it comes to be known that I am a snore.

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

It's not cute and it's not attractive.

[D]

Hey, Matt. Welcome to the show.

[F]

Hey, guys.

[D]

What's going on?

[F]

My wife is 39 week. 39 weeks pregnant right now, and she snores so loud. I've actually, like, had to sleep in another room for a couple of. Couple of nights, but now.

[D]

Wendy, are you pregnant?

[B]

No, I'm not pregnant.

[E]

Didn't Burt say that about Stacy when she's pregnant with both Hayden and Hollis?

[D]

I don't think it's fair, though. I don't think that's an equal because it's temporary snoring and a pregnant woman can get away with anything.

[B]

She can do whatever she wants.

[E]

Yeah.

[D]

Hey, Brandon, welcome to the show.

[F]

Hey, Jeff. Hey, guys.

[E]

Hey.

[D]

What's going on?

[F]

I just wanted to tell y', all, man, you know the butterfly thing for your nose that opens it up?

[E]

Mm.

[F]

Man, I don't know how I ever slept without it. My wife snored so bad. Put those on. She sleeps like a baby.

[E]

Really? Okay, so it does work.

[F]

Yes, 100%.

[D]

Now, from a guy's point of view, let's say your wife is not your wife. She's a girl that you've been dating for a few weeks, and you guys are out, and you decide that that's gonna be the night that she spends the night for the first time at your place, and she steps into the restroom at some point. Y' all are getting romantic. And comes back out with one of those breathe strips on her nose. What is the bigger turnoff?

[F]

The snoring.

[D]

The sleep strip is more acceptable than the snoring.

[F]

Oh, yeah.

[D]

Okay.

[F]

Because I mean, to wake up and look at that woman as she's going, mouth open, mouth open, drool them. I want to sleep through that.

[E]

Now, isn't there a little bit of a double standard going on here? Because men. Because, I mean, Jen. Jen has said before that if a guy ended up being a snorer, that she. That would be a deal breaker for her. Is men snoring, men sneezing, men being heavy breathers. I mean, no offense, because I think it's because men just. I mean, I'm just going on the, you know, men being kind of bigger. Bigger body mass.

[F]

Bulkier.

[E]

Bulkier. But it just is louder and it just always. Like a woman sneezing and a man sneezing are like two completely different things.

[D]

Nothing weirds me out more than a man who's got those silent sneezes where you look at him and he's like, dude, what just happened? He's like, I just sneezed. And I'm like, maiden.

[E]

That's dangerous if a guy does that.

[D]

Right. Hey, Stephanie, welcome to the show. Hey, Stephanie.

[F]

Hey. Hey.

[D]

How are you?

[F]

I'm good. How are you? Good.

[D]

How long have you been snoring?

[F]

I haven't. I work in a sleep center.

[G]

Okay.

[F]

And I was coming in on this comment about it being a male. More men.

[D]

Right.

[F]

I've had women that snore 10 times worse than men.

[E]

I don't know. I didn't say that more men snore because I do think plenty of women, so I just think they're louder.

[C]

Oh.

[F]

I have women that snore much louder than.

[E]

Really?

[F]

Yeah. You would think they pulled the paint off the wall. Yes.

[E]

And I love how she says, I don't snore. I work at a sleep center.

[H]

I don't snore.

[B]

Hey, Mary.

[E]

You don't snore.

[D]

Hey, Mary. Welcome to the show.

[F]

Hey.

[E]

Hey.

[C]

When. When my sister was in college, she's never had a lack of dates. Very attractive, constantly being asked out. She got intimate with a guy and she said the next morning, he told her, hey, do you know that you snore like a bull elephant?

[B]

Oh.

[E]

Oh.

[C]

And she was so offended. That drastically changed how she thought about herself. The idea of sleeping with someone, and she said it kind of scarred her for life. And she's always been paranoid about it. And eventually, she got her adenoids taken out, but she says she always remembers being told she snored like a bull elephant and never felt sexy again.

[E]

What's an adenoid?

[C]

Something in your nose. Your nose.

[E]

The part they scrape out.

[D]

Was she offended at all that she had been intimate with a guy who obviously has been intimate with a bull ele. Hey, Theresa. Welcome to the show.

[F]

Hey, guys.

[C]

Hey, Ray.

[D]

What's up?

[F]

Well, you know, you asked a little bit ago if anybody had not gotten into relationships because they snore.

[D]

Right.

[F]

And I snore. Awful. And I purposely stay out of relationships with different people once I find out that they're light sleepers or that snoring actually bothers them.

[D]

How did you learn that you were a bad snorer?

[F]

Oh, my kids. They. We went on a trip, and they told me that, mom, you're ridiculous. You snore in octaves. They said. It is so sad. We cannot even sleep in the same room with you.

[E]

Oh, well, can't help it. I just feel bad that everybody. You can't help it if you snore.

[D]

Hey, Lisa. Welcome to the show.

[C]

Hi.

[F]

Hi.

[C]

Hi.

[F]

I work. I love your show. I work at a sleep center also, and I just want to tell you that snoring doesn't always come through your nose. It comes through your throat. So it's a matter of which way it comes through. And it could actually be more something like apnea. And the Breathe Right strips don't always work, so. And weight does play a part of it.

[D]

Here's Wendy, issue 100. Here's Wendy,

[E]

our producer. Natalie's running the board now, and she didn't like what that woman just said.

[D]

Yes. No, it always comes through your nose.

[F]

You know what?

[E]

But I see what you're saying, that if you are a snore through your throat, that the Breathe Right strips won't work. I got it. She's so offensive.

[D]

She's gone.

[E]

She's like. That was just rude. I used to listen to your show.

[D]

Hey, Trisha, welcome to the show.

[F]

Well, good morning. Love your show, guys.

[B]

Thank you.

[C]

Hi.

[F]

I have been dating a guy for two years, and several months after we started dating, we tried to have a nice romantic weekend, and I ended up not sleeping for 48 hours because of his snoring.

[E]

Oh, my God.

[F]

The last 18 months, we've never slept together again.

[E]

Oh, honey.

[F]

Yeah, it's.

[C]

It's.

[F]

It's been hard, but, I mean, he just goes home, you know, it's.

[E]

You know, it's to the point that you're together, but then when it's time to sleep, you just sleep separately.

[F]

That's correct.

[D]

Well, we did learn. We did learn that it is more attractive to put the. The strip on the low breathe. Right thing from one guy.

[F]

I'm not just that he snores, but he quits breathing. So it's a matter of. I mean, he has a bad sleep apnea. So I'm up all night making him breathe again.

[E]

Resuscitating him.

[D]

Details.

[E]

I like what you said.

[C]

You know what?

[E]

So the solution is let him sleep by himself. And if he doesn't wake up.

[D]

Hey, listen, it's not my fault. I was in the other room. Maybe they make those strips a little in pink or something cute or clear

[B]

like nude color so they match your skin color.

[D]

That's how you're gonna get rich, Wendy.

[B]

Invent that foundation looking nose strips.

[D]

Sexy breathe. Right Strips. That's Wendy's claim to fame. This is the Birch Show.

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