The Bert Show - Vault: Women Vent About Their Men Being Too Into Their Hobbies
Air Date: March 31, 2026
Hosts: Bert, Kristin, Abby, Cassie, Tommy & The Bert Show Cast
Main Theme:
This episode invites women to share humorous (and sometimes exasperated) stories about men in their lives who are a bit too passionate about their hobbies. The show explores how hobbies, from competitive kickball to dart leagues and even restoring car parts in the shower, can become full-blown (and sometimes relationship-complicating) obsessions.
Episode Overview
The Bert Show team kicks off a lively conversation centered around the question: When do hobbies go from fun to too serious? Female listeners are encouraged to call in and vent about men whose dedication to their favorite pastimes crosses the line into the absurd, sparking laughter and camaraderie among the hosts and audience.
Key Discussion Points & Insights
1. The Not-So-Casual Athlete (01:00–05:29)
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Kickball Gone Wild:
The show opens with stories about men who treat recreational sports leagues with Olympic-level seriousness. Intern Ben is recruited as a "ringer" for a local kickball league, only to find the game has the intensity of a pro sport, complete with uniforms, Under Armour, Gatorade hydration, and players "eating oranges between innings."- Quote: “All the dudes are in their Under Armour. And he said all of them were, like, drinking Gatorade. They had their game face on. They all had uniforms.” – Bird Show Host 2 (02:08)
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Rock Band: The Basement Saga:
One host shares a story of a man who hosts intense “rock band” video game practices in his basement. The basement is off-limits to distractions, and the group apparently competes in regional tournaments, taking "rehearsals" as seriously as an actual band.- Quote: “They have their rehearsals, like, three or four times. She’s not allowed down in the basement. There can be no distractions.” – Bird Show Host 2 (03:26)
2. Women’s Venting Lines Open (05:05–09:59)
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Caller: Jill – The Kickball Tournament Mastermind (04:07)
Jill shares that the infamous kickball group is trying to make it into the Guinness Book of World Records, boasting about 200,000 members on Facebook.- Quote: “They have got it patented where they want to... go in the Guinness Book of Records to have the biggest kickball tournament.” – Jill (04:09)
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Caller: Sharon – The All-Season Hunter & Athlete (05:40)
Sharon’s boyfriend jumps from hunting season to sports season, rarely taking a break from his string of hobbies. She’s glad he’s not “in the clubs,” but the constant hobby loop leaves her exhausted.- Quote: “It’s always something. We’ve been together for almost three years now and I can’t get him to stop. I don’t want him to stop… At least he’s not in the clubs or in a bar or whatever.” – Sharon (05:40)
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The Host Response on Hobby Intensity:
The hosts agree that some men go "all out"—even with face paint and deer urine cologne for hunting.- Quote: “If I’m rubbing the urine of another animal into my hair, then I’m buying the nicest gun. I’m wearing the most disguised camo.” – Bird Show Host 1 (06:25)
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Caller: Kelly – Dart League Devotion (07:03)
Kelly describes her friend’s dart obsession: practicing nightly, marking off regulation throw lines on her floor, and custom ordering dart parts—all for a league with no prizes.- Quote: “She practices for 30 minutes every night, and no one can talk to her while she practices.” – Kelly (07:03)
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Caller: Wanda – Car Parts in the Shower (07:48)
Wanda’s husband restores cars to the point of cleaning automotive grilles in their shower because it’s "easier than outside."- Quote: “I go open the shower one day, and there’s a front grill in my shower.” – Wanda (07:48)
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Caller: Lena – A Skater’s Midlife Crisis (08:16)
Lena’s 31-year-old husband builds backyard half-pipes and starts dressing like skate legend Rob Dyrdek to rekindle his skateboarding days.- Quote: “My husband has recently taken up skateboarding again... he’s 31 years old, built half pipes and ramps... and started dressing like Rob Dyrdek.” – Lena (08:16)
Host’s reaction: “It’s his little mini midlife crisis, I think.” – Bird Show Host 3 (08:32)
- Quote: “My husband has recently taken up skateboarding again... he’s 31 years old, built half pipes and ramps... and started dressing like Rob Dyrdek.” – Lena (08:16)
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Dropped Call: Tricycle Drifting at 29
Mention is made of a caller whose 29-year-old husband is into “tricycle drifting”—doing car-style drifts on adult-sized trikes—prompting bewildered and amused reactions from the hosts.
3. Hosts’ Reflections on Extreme Hobbying
- The hosts reflect on how certain hobbies serve as escapes—and sometimes evasions—from relationship time.
- Quote: “If I were with a guy... that went from one to the next to the next... I would think he was avoiding me.” – Bird Show Host 3 (06:48)
- Host 2 responds jokingly: “Well, you’d probably be right.” (06:57)
Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments
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On Hobby Intensity:
“Sorry, baby, no sex this week, man. I got a kickball tournament on Saturday. You know the rules.” – Bird Show Host 2 (05:25) -
On Relationship Escape:
“You’re signing up for another sport so you don’t have to hang out with me.” – Bird Show Host 3 (06:58) -
On Serious Darts:
“She doesn’t, but she orders the special flags because she thinks it’ll make it go faster or slower… and she has T shirts when she goes to her dart league.” – Kelly (07:23) -
On Car Parts in the Bathroom:
“Because it was easier for him to wash it while he was in the shower than to do it out back.” – Wanda (07:53)
Timestamps for Key Segments
- 01:00 – Show kicks off: Introduction to men and their intense hobbies
- 02:08 – Intern Ben’s ultra-serious kickball league story
- 03:26 – Basement rock band competitions
- 04:07 – Jill calls: Origins and ambitions of the mega kickball tournament
- 05:40 – Sharon calls: Dealing with a man whose hobbies never stop
- 07:03 – Kelly calls: Dart practice obsession
- 07:48 – Wanda calls: Car part cleaning gone wild
- 08:16 – Lena calls: Husband’s skateboarding renaissance
- 08:49 – Brief mention: Tricycle drifting by a 29-year-old
- 10:11 – Wrap up and segue to ads/content ending
Tone & Style
In classic Bert Show fashion, the tone remains light, playful, and self-deprecating throughout, with hosts and callers alike poking fun at the quirks of hobby over-investment. Even as listeners vent, there’s a spirit of affection and good-natured ribbing—this is a group that can laugh together about the sometimes ridiculous lengths people will go for their interests.
Summary Takeaway
“Vault: Women Vent About Their Men Being Too Into Their Hobbies” delivers a relatable, hilarious roundtable of women airing out the not-so-casual obsessions of the men in their lives, from hyper-competitive kickball leagues to basement “rock bands,” nightly dart practice, and beyond. The show balances the comedic extremes of hobby culture with the reality that, for many, these hobbies are passion projects—if sometimes at the expense of quality couple time. Listeners come away with laughs, the feeling that they’re not alone, and maybe a better sense of where to draw the line between fun and fanaticism.
