Vault: Would You Date A Man Who Lack Experience In The Bedroom?

Summary

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The Bert Show (Pionaire Podcasting)

Episode: Vault: Would You Date A Man Who Lacks Experience In The Bedroom?

Release Date: December 30, 2025
Main Topic: Would women be willing to date men who are virgins—or lack sexual experience—and how does that impact dating and relationships? The Bert Show cast and listeners explore the social perceptions, personal feelings, and pros and cons around dating men with little or no sexual experience.

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Episode Overview

This episode dives headfirst into the question: “Would you date a man who lacks experience in the bedroom?” Sparked by an incident on a recent episode of The Bachelorette, where a male contestant revealed he was saving himself, The Bert Show cast and listeners weigh in on whether sexual inexperience in adult men is a dealbreaker, a plus, or something more complicated. The conversation covers societal double standards, feelings of guilt or inadequacy, “training” a partner, fear of sexual curiosity after marriage, and respect for personal beliefs.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Setting the Stage: The Bachelorette Virgin Man

Timestamp: 01:22-02:00

• The discussion kicks off referencing a male contestant from The Bachelorette who confesses his virginity and is promptly sent home.
• Drewski observes:

  "I think a guy's attitude towards virgins and a woman's attitude towards virgins may be totally different here. Like, I think the fantasy for guys is, at least stereotypically, every guy wants a virgin. Whereas with women, I'm wondering... does that go in the plus column or does that go in the negative column?" (02:02)

2. First Impressions & Social Stigma

Timestamp: 02:30-03:25

• Female callers discuss the kneejerk assumption that something might be “wrong” with an adult male virgin, contrasting with popular expectations for male sexual behavior.
• Female Caller 2 candidly admits:

  "If you hear of an adult virgin male, the first thing that automatically maybe pops in your head is 'what’s wrong with them?'" (02:46)

3. Matching Sexual Experience & Guilt Factor

Timestamp: 03:25-04:33

• The cast debates whether women themselves would feel guilt or discomfort about being more experienced, and how mutual inexperience could “match” belief systems.
• Female Caller 3 reflects:

  "I think it’s more about how we would feel about our own sexual experience. Like feeling guilty about our own... like, well, he hasn’t done it. I feel guilty that I’ve, you know, thrown it here and there and there." (03:32, 03:44 for comedic repetition)

• Guilt and shame about one’s past, versus a partner's inexperience, emerge as complicating factors.

4. Listener Call-Ins: Real-Life Experience

Timestamp: 04:03-06:31

• Emily (Caller): Dated a 25-year-old virgin and found the experience lacking passion. She also felt “almost dirty” due to her experience.

  "There was just like a lack of passion on that side... I definitely have had experience and I definitely felt a little, I guess almost like dirty because he hadn't." (04:18, 04:33)

• Lauren (Caller): Sees an upside—“training” a man to suit her preferences.

  "If he is a virgin, you can at least, you know, train him the way you want." (05:01)

• A tension exists between viewing inexperience as a blank slate or as a drawback.

5. Fear of Curiosity After Commitment

Timestamp: 05:54-06:36

• Some listeners worry that marrying someone with no prior partners could lead them to “want to venture out” later, fueled by sexual curiosity.
• Female Caller’s concern:

  "If he's never been with anyone else, then he's going to want to venture out during the marriage ... get curious about how someone else is." (06:16)

• The cast notes this is “way more than a guy would think,” highlighting gendered perspectives on sexual variety and fidelity.

6. Jealousy & Insecurity from Mismatched Experience

Timestamp: 06:38-07:36

• Sherry (Caller): Was a virgin on her wedding night while her husband was more experienced, leading to jealousy and insecurity.

  "I always had the jealousy factor there, you know? Like those other girls, were they better than me?" (06:42)

• Drewski shares a story of a Mormon couple—both virgins—whose wedding night was awkward and unsuccessful due to mutual insecurity. (07:11-07:36)

7. Respect, Molding, & Sexual Expectations

Timestamp: 07:53-09:03

• Some women see value in a virgin partner’s respect for themselves and for women, and the possibility to “mold” them to their desires.

  "You can mold a man into what you want him to be if he’s a virgin." (08:04)

• Drewski jokes about the optimism of improving the “2 in 10” statistic (only 2 in 10 men are good in bed, per the show's running claim).
• Yet, everyone acknowledges awkwardness and difficulty in those first sexual experiences.

8. “Ain’t Nobody Got Time For That”: Time Investment & Frustration

Timestamp: 09:24-10:11

• Nicole (Caller): Flatly rejects the idea of dating a virgin, saying training is too much work and many experienced men still need “training.”

  “I am fabulous. And you know I cannot have me no virgin. That’s not gonna work. I mean, half the guys now don’t even know what they doing... much less a damn—Hell no. Then I gotta train ‘em... That take too long. No, no, don’t want to do that.” (09:28-10:11)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Drewski (Host):
  "Does a woman really want a guy that's a virgin?" (04:46)

• Caller Emily:
  "Yeah, it was just like a lack of passion on that side. And then... I definitely felt almost like dirty because he hadn't." (04:18-04:33)

• Caller Nicole:
  "You know I cannot have me no virgin. That’s not gonna work... I ain’t got time to be trying to train nobody." (09:28-10:11)

• Caller on Future Curiosity:
  "If he's never been with anyone else, then he's going to want to venture out during the marriage at some point, get curious about how someone else is." (06:16)

• Caller Sherry (jealousy):
  "I always had the jealousy factor there, you know? Like those other girls, Were they better than me? Kind of." (06:42)

• Caller (on “training”):
  "If he is a virgin, you can at least, you know, train him the way you want." (05:01)

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Segment Timestamps

• 01:22 – 02:00: Setting up the Bachelorette story and posing the main question
• 02:30 – 03:25: First reactions and societal framing of male virginity
• 03:25 – 04:33: Self-consciousness, guilt, and sexual experience disparities
• 04:03 – 06:36: Listener call-ins with personal stories and opinions
• 06:38 – 07:36: Jealousy, insecurity, and shared stories about mismatched experience in relationships
• 07:53 – 09:03: Discussing value in a virgin partner and the realities of “teaching”
• 09:24 – 10:11: The “Ain’t got time for that” segment, final listener frustrations

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Tone & Takeaways

Lively, candid, and sometimes irreverent, the episode is full of real talk, humor, and honest admissions about insecurities and desires. The recurring sentiment: most women on the show would find dating an inexperienced man complicated, citing worries about passion, future curiosity, and the energy required to educate. While respect for personal beliefs is acknowledged, most see mismatched experience levels as a challenge.

For those who haven’t listened:
This episode offers a no-holds-barred, funny, and open look at a surprisingly layered dating question, with perspectives ranging from practical, to playful, to skeptical, all in classic Bert Show style.

Transcript

[Progressive Insurance Announcer]

This episode is brought to you by Progressive Insurance. Do you ever think about switching insurance companies to see if you could save some cash? Progressive makes it easy to see if you could save when you bundle your home and auto policies. Try [e-mail] Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and affiliates. Potential savings will vary. Not available in all states.

[Mrs. Claus]

Guys, thanks for helping me carry my Christmas tree.

[Zoe]

Zoe, this thing weighs a ton.

[Drewski]

Drewski, live with your legs, man.

[Santa]

Santa. Santa, did you get my letter?

[Zoe]

He's talking to you, Bridges.

[Santa]

I'm not.

[Mrs. Claus]

Of course he did.

[Drewski]

Right, Santa, My elf Drew Ski here. He handles the nice list.

[Zoe]

And elf. I'm six' three. What everyone wants is iPhone 17 and at T mobile you can get it on them. That center stage front camera is amazing for group selfies, right, Mrs. Claus?

[Mrs. Claus]

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[Drewski]

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[Mrs. Claus]

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[Zoe]

Guys, my side of the tree is slipping.

[Drewski]

Kimber, the holidays are better.

[T-Mobile Announcer]

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[Drewski]

The bird show but on the Bachelorette last night, here's what we got rolling here. Jen, she's up there and she's being jockeyed by all these different guys. When one confesses I've been saving myself.

[Female Caller 1]

I think the level of intimacy needs to match with the level of commitment.

[Drewski]

And I don't want to share that.

[Female Caller 1]

Deep personal intimacy until I've got somebody that's willing to commit to it. You can't say there are a lot.

[Female Caller 2]

Of men to give up.

[Mrs. Claus]

I respect that.

[Female Caller 1]

But it's not about whether he's had sex or not. That's fine. It just reflects on his belief system.

[Mrs. Claus]

And that might be a little bit.

[Female Caller 1]

Too stringent for me.

[Drewski]

Now, it should be noted that dude got axed from the show last night.

[Female Caller 3]

Yeah, he did. He did not.

[Drewski]

Should be noted that dude is gone. He is gone now because I think a guy's attitude towards Virgins. And a woman's attitude towards virgins may be totally different here. Like, I think the fantasy for guys is, at least stereotypically, is every guy wants a virgin. Whereas with women, I'm wondering if you guys are out and you're dating and a guy tells you that he's a virgin, does that go in the plus column or does that go in the negative column? Is that a catch or is that a guy that you let go?

[Female Caller 2]

Well, I think, you know, you just were so used to the idea that guys start young and they're, you know, wild and they're just guys or being guys, so they're out and about and planting their seeds and all this stuff. And so if you hear of an adult virgin male, I think the first thing that automatically maybe pops in your head is what's wrong with them.

[Drewski]

Really? Really?

[Female Caller 3]

Is what?

[Female Caller 2]

That's the thought. Well, I mean, that's my perception now.

[Female Caller 3]

See, my thought is it depends on whether you are a virgin yourself. Because I think if the girl has saved herself for marriage and the guy has saved themselves or saved himself for marriage, then I think together it would be a beautiful thing. Yeah, because they both have the same belief system and that sort of thing. And I think that somebody who was a virgin would probably really like that if her guy was a virgin as well. But I think that if you have had sex before, but you're gonna be deflowering the man, you kind of feel like.

[Female Caller 1]

Don't say it like that.

[Female Caller 3]

I don't know, like, I think it would be such a self conscious thing.

[Drewski]

What do. I guess another question here is, do women want a guy with experience, a guy that knows what he's doing and a guy to take control?

[Female Caller 3]

I don't think it's that. I think it's more about how we would feel about our own sexual experience. Like feeling guilty about our own. Like, well, he hasn't done it. I feel guilty that I've, you know, thrown it here and there and there.

[Drewski]

Throwing it here and there and there.

[Female Caller 3]

And there and there and there and here and here and there and there and here.

[Drewski]

404-741-1005 My goodness. Hey, Emily.

[Santa]

Hello.

[Drewski]

Good morning.

[Female Caller 1]

Good morning.

[Drewski]

Where do you stand on this? Is it a good thing if you're dating a virgin? I mean, are you turned off by that if a guy tells you that?

[Female Caller 1]

Well, I actually did, and he was 25, so it was something that definitely threw me for a loop. And at first I was kind of that way in the negative column, but I Thought I'd be open minded. And yeah, it didn't really work out.

[Female Caller 3]

Really?

[Female Caller 1]

Yeah, it was just like a lack of passion on that side. And then also with the thing, I guess what Jen was saying, I definitely have had experience and I definitely felt a little, I guess almost like dirty because he hadn't.

[Drewski]

So there's that guilt factor working also.

[Female Caller 1]

Yeah, very much so.

[Female Caller 3]

I think we have that guilt factor working anyway. But then a guy to throw it right in your face and be like, well, I never have. And you're like, ooh, well, I kind.

[Drewski]

Of have a lot. Does a woman really want a guy that's a virgin? Hey, Lauren.

[Santa]

Hey.

[Female Caller 1]

What's going on?

[Drewski]

You tell us.

[Female Caller 1]

Well, I mean, I guess it's a two way street, but if he is a virgin, you can at least, you know, train him the way you want.

[Female Caller 2]

So, I mean, train it, man.

[Female Caller 3]

You would like a virgin.

[Female Caller 1]

I'm not necessarily saying that I would like it or not, but at least that way, if he was, you could.

[Drewski]

Say she's just looking for the silver lining.

[Female Caller 3]

Lukewarm to it? No, no, no. Lukewarm.

[Santa]

But you never know.

[Female Caller 1]

I mean, it could be a good thing, it could be a bad thing.

[Female Caller 2]

So are you married?

[Female Caller 1]

No, I am not.

[Female Caller 2]

Okay, because I was gonna say that because if she's out of the game completely, then that's why she has the ideal. Oh, it'd be wonderful.

[Female Caller 1]

You know, I'm not saying it would be wonderful. I'm just saying that, you know, you gotta look at the positives. I mean, that way if you can, you know, you get your man and say, okay, well, he doesn't really know much, then you can.

[Drewski]

Well, I'm here, in here. So you gotta make lemonade out of lemons, right?

[Female Caller 2]

It won't last. The lemonade is not going to last as long as it might last in another situation.

[Santa]

But.

[Drewski]

Majesty, you're on all the hits. Q100.

[Female Caller 1]

Yes, I wanted to comment on dating a guy that was a virgin.

[Santa]

I've done that in the past.

[Female Caller 1]

And like I was saying, I kind of have like a man's ideal about it. Like, I felt like, yeah, I took that. But honestly, I would not want to date a man that was a virgin as far as getting married, because I feel like if he's never been with anyone else, then he's going to want to venture out during the marriage at some point, get curious about how someone else is.

[Female Caller 3]

That's a good thought.

[Drewski]

What a great example of a woman thinking way more than a guy would. Way ahead of the game.

[Female Caller 3]

That's true. You'd be like, well, I'm the only one.

[Zoe]

Right?

[Female Caller 1]

I feel like, is he gonna want to test the waters with someone else? Because I'm the only one he's been with. Because I know personally, if I had never been with someone else, I'd be like, well, you're good.

[Female Caller 2]

But what if once he's been to the promised land, he want to keep exploring territory?

[Drewski]

Good point. Hey, Sherry.

[Santa]

Hey.

[Drewski]

Hi.

[Female Caller 1]

Hi.

[Female Caller 2]

Hi.

[Santa]

Light. I was.

[Female Caller 1]

When I got married, I was a virgin. Very inexperienced, had no idea. And my husband had been around the block a couple times, and I always had the jealousy factor there, you know? Like those other girls, Were they better than me? Kind of.

[Female Caller 3]

Are you jealous that he had other partners? Like, do you wish you had other partners?

[Female Caller 1]

Well, no. See, at first, I was very jealous that he had other partners. I wanted him to be a virgin along with me.

[Female Caller 3]

Right.

[Drewski]

I see. I will say this about that. We knew a couple in Dallas that was Mormon that were. And I told these guys a story before that were both virgins on their wedding night. And when time came to consummate the marriage, they sat there on the edge of the bed and looked at each other like, so, what do we do now? And they were both so insecure about it that it was a miserable wedding night because everything just went so wrong for him, you know, Poor things.

[Female Caller 1]

Yeah, I guess you could say that.

[Female Caller 3]

Melissa has some instructional videos that can help out.

[Drewski]

I think she's actually started a couple. Hey, Andrea, does a woman want a guy that is a virgin, or is that a. No, no.

[Female Caller 1]

Well, I think personally, you know, all women, Most men go out and they sleep around with women and they do their thing. But if you have a man that's a virgin, you know, for one, he has respect, and he also has respect for women, I think, personally, you know. But all. I can probably speak for all women. All women, you know, they want what they want sexually. But I think you can mold a man into what you want him to be if he's a virgin.

[Drewski]

Now, we got to keep in mind here that the statistic that you women have rattled off to us is that only 2 in 10 guys are good in bed. So I would think that you'd be thirsty for a virgin to teach them how to do it. Right.

[Female Caller 1]

Well, you know, also, you know, if a man. If you're the woman that he has, you were his first, you have to look at it like he's gonna have more love and respect for you just because you were his first.

[Female Caller 3]

I agree with that. I mean, I would agree with the respect part and him respecting himself and him having a lot of respect for women. I definitely agree with you there. But is that. Is that the horse you want to bet on if you don't know, and.

[Drewski]

You'Re gonna be betting a long time.

[Female Caller 2]

You know, not the first time, but. Well, I guess, you know, you have to know it's not gonna. I don't know, it would be difficult because you would have to know that the first time is going to be awkward. And I mean, it normally is anyway with people who have a lot of experience and to be with somebody who's never had any, I don't. Yeah, that would be tough.

[Drewski]

Good morning, Nicole.

[Santa]

Good morning, everybody.

[Drewski]

How are you?

[Santa]

I am fabulous. And you know I cannot have me no virgin. That's not gonna work. I mean, half the guys now don't even know what they doing, much less a damn Hell no. Then I gotta train em. No, baby, that ain't it. No. Come on, keep trying, boo. That ain't it now. I ain't got time for all that. Too much work. I ain't got time. Uh, no. I do not have time to be trying to train nobody.

[Female Caller 1]

What you doing?

[Santa]

Half the ones out there now don't know what they doing anyway. And I gotta halfway train somebody that think they know what they doing. That's hard enough as it is. Trying to train somebody like, oh, I.

[Female Caller 1]

Know what I'm doing.

[Santa]

Hell no, you don't.

[Female Caller 3]

Nicole is not starting from scratch.

[Santa]

I'm not. That take too long. No, no, don't want to do that. Y' all have a good morning. I'll see y Friday.

[Drewski]

All right. The Bird Show. When you're a forward thinker, you don't just bring your A game, you bring your AI game. Workday is the AI platform that transforms the way you manage your people, money and agents. So you can transform tomorrow workday, moving business forever forward.

[Progressive Insurance Announcer]

This episode is brought to you by Progressive Insurance. Do you ever think about switching insurance companies to see if you could save some cash? Progressive makes it easy to see if you could save when you bundle your home and auto policies. Try [e-mail] Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and affiliates. Potential savings will vary. Not available in all states.

[Mrs. Claus]

Guys, thanks for helping me carry my Christmas tree.

[Zoe]

Zoe, this thing weighs a ton.

[Drewski]

Drewski, live with your legs, man.

[Santa]

Santa. Santa, did you get my letter?

[Zoe]

He's talking to you, Bridges.

[Santa]

I'm not.

[Mrs. Claus]

Of course he did. Right, Santa?

[Drewski]

You know my elf, Drew Ski here.

[Zoe]

He handles the nice list and elf I'm six' three. What everyone wants is iPhone 17 and at T mobile you can get it on them. That center stage front camera is amazing for group selfies right Mrs. Claus I'm.

[Mrs. Claus]

Mrs. Claus much younger sister and AT T mobile there's no trade in needed when you switch so you can keep.

[Drewski]

Your old phone or give it as a gift.

[Mrs. Claus]

And the best part? You can make the switch to T mobile from your phone in just 15 minutes. 15 minutes guys.

[Zoe]

My side of the tree is slipping.

[Drewski]

Kimber the holidays are better.

[T-Mobile Announcer]

AT T Mobile switch in just 15 minutes and get iPhone 17 on us with no trade in needed and now T mobile is available in U S cellular stores with three 4 monthly bill credits for well qualified customers plus tax and 35 device connection charge credit sentinel balance due if you pay off earlier. Case financing room 256 gigs 830 eligible port in a new line 100 plus a month plan with auto payments taxes fees required. Check out 15 minutes or less per line. Visit t mobile.com.