B&T Extra: Alli Breen- Sexy Time

Summary

Podcast Summary: The BOB & TOM Show Free Podcast
Episode: B&T Extra: Alli Breen- Sexy Time
Release Date: February 28, 2025

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Introduction

In this episode of B&T Extra, hosts Bob and Tom delve into a comedic exploration of relationship dilemmas in their segment titled "Sexy Time," featuring insights and interactions with stand-up comedian Ali Breen. The episode, released on February 28, 2025, seamlessly blends humor with relatable relationship issues, offering listeners both laughs and thoughtful commentary.

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Segment 1: The All-New 2005 Schooneria Hybrid Automobile

Timestamp: 00:55 - 02:19

Bob and Tom kick off the episode with a satirical advertisement-style discussion of the fictitious 2005 Schooneria, a hybrid automobile from Frigga Mall Automotive. The car humorously combines outdated technology with absurd features, highlighting the duo's knack for blending humor with product parody.

• Bob (00:55): "The all new 2005 Schooneria comes fully equipped with a CD player, automatic transmission, leather seats, a sextant and a beautifully crafted mainsail."

• Tom (02:19): "The all new 2005 Schooneria is no slouch in the speed department. It's capable of going from 0 to 60 knots in just over 8 seconds."

This segment exemplifies their comedic approach, poking fun at evolving automotive technology and consumer expectations.

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Segment 2: Introduction to "Sexy Time" with Ali Breen

Timestamp: 02:19 - 04:21

Transitioning from automotive antics, Bob introduces their "Sexy Time" segment featuring comedian Ali Breen. The segment sets the stage for audience interaction, where listeners' relationship questions are addressed with humor and candidness.

• Bob (03:00): "In case you missed anything on the big show today, it's sexy time with comedian Ali Breen."

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Segment 3: Listener Letters – "Sexy Time" with Ali Breen

Timestamp: 04:21 - 17:30

Bob and Tom engage with listener-submitted letters seeking advice on various relationship issues. Ali Breen joins the hosts to provide comedic yet insightful responses.

1. Letter 1: Handling Repetitive “What Are You Thinking?” Questions

   • Listener (07:04): "Dear Allie, the more time I spend with my girlfriend, the more she asks me, what are you thinking?"
   • Bob (07:38): "Pretend you're her. What are you thinking, dear? How I'm gonna bury your body without getting caught if you ask me that again."
   • Notable Quote (08:00): "I think maybe she thinks it's cute, too. I mean, I don't know why someone would ask that question constantly."

2. Letter 2: Unexpected Prenup Before Wedding

   • Listener (09:10): "Dear Ally, my boyfriend proposed to me almost a year ago. We're two weeks until the wedding, and he all of a sudden showed up with a prenup."
   • Tom (09:29): "There's a chance he's trying to pressure her into doing it."
   • Notable Quote (10:48): "You have to tell her that you suck. It's all you. You're insecure."

3. Letter 3: Scratch-Off Winnings and Relationship Tensions

   • Listener (11:27): "Dear Allie, my husband had an affair about three years ago... now, after discovering a previous affair, he's making me question our honesty."
   • Bob (12:45): "I have a girlfriend. Her prenup was 26 pages long, and I'm not joking."
   • Notable Quote (13:37): "Haven't scratchers gotten a little more complicated than they need to have?"

4. Letter 4: Confronting an Ex About Children Post-Breakup

   • Listener (15:17): "Dear Allie, my husband and I always put about $20 worth of scratch offs in everyone's Christmas cards... now causing fights."
   • Tom (17:30): "He's not pulling out of a wedding two weeks before it."
   • Notable Quote (18:02): "You've opened a Pandora's box there."

Throughout these interactions, Bob and Tom employ sharp wit and humor to dissect the complexities of modern relationships, offering exaggerated yet amusing advice that resonates with listeners.

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Segment 4: Ali Breen’s Insights and Personal Touch

Timestamp: 14:11 - 15:10

Ali Breen shares personal anecdotes and humorous takes on topics like OnlyFans content and creative Valentine's Day ideas, adding depth and relatability to the segment.

• Ali Breen (14:11): "It's been good. I tried doing a light show for Christmas. Not pulling them out clown style."
• Bob (15:08): "You just gotta know your audience."

Her contributions enhance the conversational dynamic, providing a fresh perspective and enhancing listener engagement.

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Conclusion

The episode wraps up with Bob and Tom reinforcing the fun and supportive atmosphere of B&T Extra, encouraging listeners to continue engaging with their favorite segments and stay tuned for upcoming shows.

• Bob (17:30): "Once again, you can reach Ali Breen at A L L I B R E E N. Good luck with your gig."

The hosts conclude with a light-hearted nod to football readiness, maintaining their signature blend of humor and community connection.

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Key Takeaways:

• Humorous Relationship Advice: Bob and Tom tackle relatable relationship issues with a comedic twist, making listeners both laugh and reflect.

• Engaging Listener Interaction: The "Sexy Time" segment fosters a sense of community by addressing real-life dilemmas submitted by listeners.

• Comedic Guest Appearance: Ali Breen’s participation adds a fresh and dynamic element, enriching the overall listening experience.

Notable Quotes:

• Bob (07:38): "Pretend you're her. What are you thinking, dear? How I'm gonna bury your body without getting caught if you ask me that again."

• Tom (09:29): "There's a chance he's trying to pressure her into doing it."

• Bob (13:37): "Haven't scratchers gotten a little more complicated than they need to have?"

This episode of The BOB & TOM Show exemplifies the hosts' ability to blend humor with genuine discussion, making it a captivating listen for both regular fans and newcomers alike.

Transcript

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TurboTax Live full service. Seek guaranteed [e-mail] guarantees. Welcome back. It's another Bob and Tom extra. This is Christopher. Not only is the Bob and Tom show live every weekday morning, but every afternoon we'll give you a little extra. In case you missed anything on the big show today. It's sexy time with comedian Ali Breen. And it's coming up right after this. Get in the zone. AutoZone. Welcome to the A to Z Savings Event at AutoZone. Yeah, happy to be here. Can I get some rotors? Would you like brake pads with that? How much are the brake pads free with the rotors? Free. Really, really free. Okay. I also need some oil. Would you like an oil filter with that? Yeah. How much is that? Free with five quarts of oil? Free. Really, really free. It's part of the A to Z Savings event. You might as well call it a to free at AutoZone. Get in the zone. AutoZone restrictions apply. Gasoline prices are at an all time high. Yet many Americans still want to drive a large vehicle. That's why Frigga Mall Automotive has developed a new hybrid automobile. It's the all new 2005 Schooneria. Hey Bill. Did you get a new car? Sure did. Wow, she's a beaut. Thanks. She sure is huge.

[B]

Yep.

[A]

I bet the gas mileage is killing you. You lose that bet, Fred. It's a hybrid. You mean part of the time it runs on gasoline and part of the time it runs on electricity? No, actually it runs on gasoline and wind power. Wind power? How's that work? Simple. I just hit this button and the Main sail is hoisted right through the sunroof. The all new 2005 Schooneria comes fully equipped with a CD player, automatic transmission, leather seats, a sextant and a beautifully crafted mainsail. Wow, that's impressive. I noticed when the sail's deployed there's not much room in the back. Where do the kids sit? Oh, they're up in the crow's nest. The all new 2005 Schooneria is no slouch in the speed department. It's capable of going from 0 to 60 knots in just over 8 seconds or 4 seconds in Florida during hurricane season. The all new 2005 Schooneria, the hybrid that's economical, practical and fun to drive. Well, I'm very impressed, Bill, but did you notice your starboard front fender has termites. No problem. The 2005 Schooneria comes with a 60,000 mile chew proof warranty. The 2005 Schooneria test sale won today. The 2005 Schooneria from Frigama All Automotive where our motto is we steal from the technology of the past so we can steal your money in the future. Man, where are we going to park this baby? Don't worry, the kids are looking out for a spot. Hey dad. Parking space ahoy. The Bob and Tom show is still trying to wake up. In the meantime, more Bob and Tom extra having a terrific morning and my gosh, if it's not one of our favorite weekly segments right now. Actually, Tom, who's joining us, we're going to hook up with a show we call Sexy Time with Ally Breen and Ally Bed. This is. Are we. Are you. You in your apartment? No, that's. You're at a hotel, right?

[B]

I'm in a hotel. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. I have some bed involved so it really looks like Sexy Time here.

[A]

Yeah. You got a Shay long over there. Nice.

[B]

Exactly.

[A]

Is anybody in that bed? Like right now?

[B]

There's no one in that bed.

[A]

Okay. Cuz I, I.

[B]

No one is in that bed.

[A]

I'm. That'd be.

[B]

That would be great if a head just popped out. Yeah, yeah.

[A]

Uncomfortable moment if, you know, suddenly someone kind of rolled out. Pantless. What a night. What the hell you doing? What's the light on for? Ally Breen is a standup comedian and you must be somewhere. Can you say where you are?

[B]

I am. I'm in Stuart, Florida. I'm visiting my aunt and I'm doing a retirement community show tomorrow night.

[A]

So that'll be fun.

[B]

Doing the Florida retirement winter tour. Which is kind of nice actually. It's like 17 degrees in New York right now.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah. Well, now Allie is our correspondent in the. In the world of what we call sexy time. By the way, have you seen. Are you watching by chance, Apple tv, the show Disclaimer?

[B]

No.

[A]

Okay. I bring it up because Sacha Baron Cohen is in it and it's not a comedy and he's a terrific actor.

[B]

Okay, I have watched Disclaimer. I don't know the names of anything anymore. I just watch. I have been watching that. It's really good. The audio on mine is really messed up. When it has her inner monologue, you can barely hear it. I don't know if you guys have that.

[A]

No, that's the way it's recorded. Really? It's low. Oh, really? Yeah, but I mean, it's too low.

[B]

You have to.

[A]

Have you gotten. Have you gotten through episode three?

[B]

Yes.

[A]

I don't want to give too much away, but it's extraordinarily graphic, wouldn't you say? Yeah. Tom cannot stop talking about this Ally. Ever since we've gotten back from break. No, I just wanted to. I just wanted to. I really wanted Christy to see it. I'm gonna see it. I'm definitely gonna. It's.

[B]

Yeah, very sexy. Do you know who she is?

[A]

No.

[B]

The daughter. I think of Vincent D'Onofrio.

[A]

Oh, wow.

[B]

Yeah, I think that's right. I looked it up. She's.

[A]

She's beautiful.

[B]

Gorgeous. Oh, my God.

[A]

Yeah, but remember in the old. In the old days, the. The black and white movie, they kind of kiss and then the camera pans back and then the door is shut and you. It's left to your imagination. This is exactly the opposite.

[B]

This one's going all the way.

[A]

Yes, they kiss and then it turns into porno. But.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

In any event, I. I was just wondering if you'd have been enjoying that. Let's. Let's move forward here. The way this. As they write letters to Ally, they can reach her. It's a L L I B R E E N on various social media platforms with your love troubles. What have you got, Allie?

[B]

Dear Allie, the more time I spend with my girlfriend, the more she asks me, what are you thinking? Every time there's a moment of silence. I love her to death, but I honestly can't handle this question. I usually just say nothing, but then she thinks I'm covering up for some deep thoughts. I don't want to tell her. And then I say, honestly, dinner or football or whatever, and then she's mad I'm not thinking about us.

[A]

This is an easy one. Pretend you're her. What are you thinking, dear? How I'm gonna bury your body without getting caught if you ask me that again. Oh, man.

[B]

At least she'd be like, well, that's passion. You're thinking about us, so that might help. Yeah.

[A]

Oh, God, woman. Yeah, That. I. That's. That's so I. I bail. It. Really. This woman is very insecure. Very. Yeah, insecure.

[B]

I think maybe she thinks it's cute, too. I mean, I don't know why someone would ask that question constantly. It's got. You've got to know. It's annoying.

[A]

Do people not enjoy. Quiet. What am I Now, wait a minute. Have you never asked it? I don't think I've ever been with a woman who hasn't asked me it at least once. Really? Every. You all do this. You don't all do it incessantly, and you don't all do it as you age. It's much more of a younger woman thing. Okay. Cause I don't. What. What are you. But I promise you, you have all asked. I don't care what you all asked. One gu. All this guy has to do is say, you know what? I was actually just wondering what you were thinking about. And then she'll just talk for 30 minutes straight. That's actually pretty great advice. That's brilliant.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Honestly. And you're set for a day, so hopefully that works.

[B]

And then she thinks you're interested. That's a really perfect solution.

[A]

I would still bail. Yeah. Here, try it again, Josh, you'll be her. What are you thinking of getting out of. Yeah. Is this something I said? Yeah, if it's. The question's coming over and over and over again. That's a problem. Yeah.

[B]

Yeah. Too much.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah. I'm not sure. I'm not sure if comedy will work. If you can say I'm thinking of killing you, I'm sorry. Go ahead. What have you got, Ally?

[B]

That's a good point. Dear Ally, my boyfriend proposed to me almost a year ago. We're two weeks until the wedding, and he all of a sudden showed up with a prenup. It's not even that I'd be against a prenup, but it feels like he's trying to pressure me into doing it, seeing that he didn't bring it up before, during, or right after the engagement. Am I being paranoid or is this the way people do it?

[A]

I'm gonna add a little bit more paranoia for you. There's a classic episode of Seinfeld where George wants out of his engagement. He doesn't want to go through with it. And so the recommendation is, hey, throw a prenup at her, and she will probably be so offended that she'll call the wedding off herself. Yeah. So there's a chance he's doing that.

[B]

Oh, Josh just made it worse.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah. We're here to help. I mean, are typical prenups done two weeks before a wedding? Just sign the prenup. Or is it from Mummy and Daddy who does not approve of you where you come from? Right. Yeah. Have an attorney read it. Don't just sign it. No. Anytime I. If and when I'm married, there, no matter how many times, I will get a prenup each time, and it will just be written by me, and it will say, when we break up, you get nothing of mine and I get nothing of yours. That's acceptable. You don't have to take me to a lawyer. Yeah. And she'll sign it, and I will hang it on the fridge. The question is. It sounds like. To me. The question is, she sprung this on the. On her at the last minute. Yeah. Right. What it sounds like. Very unusual. Usually you talk about that way in advance. Yeah, But.

[B]

And that's the thing. You're not going to pull out of a wedding two weeks before it. And so it is tricky on his part.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

To be like, well, do you want to tell all your friends and family that we're going to call it off? Or you want to just sign this piece of paper?

[A]

Yeah, I probably. Yes. I think Christy nailed it. Get a lawyer. Yeah. Because a lot of prenups. I have a girlfriend. Her prenup was 26 pages long, and I'm not joking. Yeah. I mean, they're not as simple as, what, 26 pages? Yeah. What Josh is saying. Yeah. Some of them are very detailed. So I'd be. Did she inventory all of her panties? What the hell is going on? Well, let's move on. Next. Wow.

[B]

Dear Allie, my husband and I always put about $20 worth of scratch offs in everyone's Christmas cards. His sister this year won $10,000 in one of the scratch offs. Yeah. Finally, I told him that she should give us at least half of it. No, he won't bring it up to her. And she's only offered to take us out to dinner as a thank you.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

It's actually causing a huge fight. Don't you think she should offer to give us at least some.

[A]

It was a gift.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Though I have to admit, as someone who, as you know, I handed out Scratchers to you guys. This year, Pat hit for what, 50. 50. Nothing. Made me happier knowing when I found out Chick did not win a penny, I. If he won the 258,000 DOL would have blown my head off in my office. Oh, I was so happy they didn't win. I didn't win anything. Okay, well, I like you. Okay, ma'am, you're way wrong here. Yeah, you're way wrong. You're so off. Yeah, that is. That is just horrible. Unless she takes you to, like, a McDonald's for dinner. By the way, give us your husband's phone number so we can speak to him so we can get. We've got a tiny bit of advice for him. Yeah. You monster. Wow, man.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah. I'm a big fan of stocking stuffer scratch offs. They're fun. Yeah, they are fun. And it is fun to see people win. Like, I'm so happy you won 50 bucks. So fun because you didn't even know you'd won anything. No, I. I had help. Yeah. And judge us. Scratch. That goes. Hey, pat, you won $50. No, I get to keep 450. I can't tell 500 from the 50. Okay. All right.

[B]

This causes a lot of problems, I think when people win big amounts. I bet that there' constantly people who actually get angry who gave them the scratch.

[A]

What would you do if you had won the 10,000? Would you just take them to dinner or would you have done less or more?

[B]

I would have given. I think I would have given some money. Maybe like a thousand or fifteen.

[A]

I was going to say ten. Ten percent. Not bad. That's really generous.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Haven't scratchers gotten a little more complicated than they need to have? What is the point of that?

[B]

We have.

[A]

Yeah, they have. Yeah.

[B]

Because they want you to not know that you won. I think they want it to be.

[A]

Like I needed help. I couldn't figure it out. Yeah, I think there's a lot to that, actually. Really? Yeah. It's very complicated now. Let's move on. If you want to reach Ali Breen, it's a L L I B R E E N. And you can send your letters also. How's your only fans going? I noticed it. It's at Ali B A L L I B. What's happening there?

[B]

It's been good. I tried doing a light show for Christmas. Not pulling them out clown style.

[A]

But.

[B]

Just wrapping them up, wrapping myself up in them, and I think that was cute. That was fun. I know. I keep. I need to think of, like, I said I try to be creative.

[A]

Valentine's Day is coming.

[B]

Yeah, that I have to think of something good for.

[A]

I think a bubble bath. That'd be cool.

[B]

Oh, that's a good idea.

[A]

Candles, Chocolate.

[B]

That's a really good idea.

[A]

You really. No, no. You guys are thinking of these. You're thinking like women. Yeah. You know, it'd be nice. Boobs and butts. Yeah. Yes. Maybe creative shaving. Like. Like a heart shaped. The less creative, the better parts made out of pipe cleaners hanging on their boots. What if I hide behind a tree? Oh, geez. Just. Josh has said, just.

[B]

I don't know how appreciated my.

[A]

Know your audience.

[B]

I'm still going with it.

[A]

You just gotta know your audience. Okay, we have time for a couple more letters. Ally, what do you got?

[B]

Dear Ally, my husband had an affair about three years ago, which almost broke up our marriage. We went to a lot of therapy and ironically, it ended up getting us closer after all was said and done. And we felt like we were a lot more honest with each other. Now. I found out through the girl he was having an affair with that he actually had an affair prior to her as well.

[A]

Well, yeah, I'm sure she's a trustworthy source. Yeah.

[B]

I don't even know how she was in touch with this woman, but we had agreed during therapy that we'd always be truthful with each other, and that's what got us closer. And he clearly hid this from me. And when I brought it up, he said, well, this was in the past before the stuff we were talking about in therapy. And so he was promising to be honest from here on out.

[A]

Oh. Oh, I see.

[B]

All right, well, he's acting like I'm the crazy one by being upset about this. What should I do?

[A]

Yeah, I'm with Josh and this. How did he happen to. Why would you. So the other woman got together, but.

[B]

It sounds like he basically admitted he was like, oh, well, you know who.

[A]

I blame on this and this? The therapists a little bit. I believe it's the therapist responsibility in something like this to say, have there been any other indiscretions? Right. It's the therapist responsibility to open that up. That guy. You can see, you can hear his eyes roll. But at least he's not gonna volunteer that information. I don't think if. Obviously he doesn't have to. Yeah, he didn't. No girlfriend, if you can move on, like, if you've had success since the therapy sessions, just kind of let it go. It does suck. You're allowed to Be sad and hurt, but, like, let it go. Yeah. And you're not crazy, by the way, by being a little upset about that.

[B]

He's a.

[A]

You're married to a jerk. Yeah, he did.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

It sounds like he's trying. Right? And if he's trying, let him. I mean, until he screws up again. And when he does, please write us. Thank you, ladies. You are the reason that you guys allow us to continue to be jerks with that kind of attitude. Thanks. We'll continue. Are you calling us an enabler? I don't know what those words mean. I don't either. Allie, we have time for one more letter. What have you got?

[B]

Dear Allie, me and my girlfriend in my 20s were together and engaged and then broke up because I wanted to have kids and she didn't.

[A]

Oh.

[B]

Now we're 36, we're both happily married, and I just found out that she has two kids. It really actually got under my skin. I haven't seen her or thought about her in years, but I reached out to her angrily on Facebook, and I started kind of pecking and forth with her about why she wanted to have children with this guy and not me. Well, my wife saw the emails and is now furious. Basically. Feels like I wish I was with her instead of my wife.

[A]

Right.

[B]

How do I convince her I love her and I'm happy we're together? I just really need closure in this situation with my ex. Oh, boy.

[A]

Big dummy. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[B]

Oh, yeah, yeah.

[A]

You've opened a Pandora's box there. You want to know why she didn't want to have kids with you? Because I crap like this. What kind of a dad's this guy gonna be? Yeah, he's gonna ruin a couple of brand new human beings. Maybe she just used that excuse because she just didn't want to marry you. There's also people also change their mind. I didn't want kids either. I still don't want kids.

[B]

And maybe she's being nice. She just doesn't want to have kids. Kids with him.

[A]

Right.

[B]

Trying to say in general. Yeah. And she's like, I want to have kids with this guy. You would be horrible.

[A]

But, yeah, people as. As Josh said, people do change. Kids in my 20s.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And maybe she felt this guy would be a much better dad, Especially women.

[B]

There's like a biological clock that kicks in.

[A]

So the question is, how do you convince your current wife to not leave you? You gotta tell her that you suck. It's all you. You're insecure. You love her. Baby. You need to post on social media photos of you and the family and how much you love them and really just, you know, do they have a family show?

[B]

But he's flowers.

[A]

He said they have kids. The guy that he's with now? Yeah. Oh, yeah. She's with him.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Okay, okay, okay. Everybody has a family. Move on. Okay. All right. Well, thank you very much, Ally. Once again, you can reach Ali Breen. A L L I B R E E N. Good luck with your gig. Now, when you're doing a gig at the assisted living facility. Yes. Do you have, like, special topics? Don't step on any hoses. That's it for another Bob and Tom show. Extra. Catch us on it. Google play and stitcher for Bob and Tom. Extra. This is Christopher. Take care, everybody. Are you ready for football? Let's go. Truly ready for football. Yes. Are you screaming for football? What the hell is happening? Dreaming for football. Good times. Eating, sleeping, crafting, parenting, naming your pets and preparing for football. That sort of stuff happen. Oh, my goodness. Are you dancing? Jonesing, Mahomes Ing for football? That's what I'm looking forward to seeing. Good. Then you are ready for football with the Rich Eisen show podcast. They're ready. Follow and listen on your favorite platform.