B&T Extra: Comedian Myq Kaplan

Summary

Podcast Summary: B&T Extra - Comedian Myq Kaplan

The BOB & TOM Show Free Podcast, May 28, 2026

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Overview

This Bob & Tom Extra episode features comedian Myq Kaplan, known for his clever wordplay and observational humor (and for spelling his name "M Y Q"). The discussion flows from playful banter about names and monograms, into odd news stories (both real and debunked), before Kaplan debuts a new stand-up bit and talks about his current comedy specials. The show maintains its signature lighthearted, conversational tone, packed with quick wit and chemistry among the hosts and guest.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

Myq Kaplan’s Name and Monogram Tangent

• Name Origin Story (05:14–06:49):
  • Myq recounts why he spells his name with a “Q” instead of “K,” crediting teenage inspiration from Prince’s symbolic name change.
    • “Compared to what Prince did, I’m a pretty normal guy. You can still use a regular keyboard.” – Myq Kaplan (05:39)
  • Discussion follows on the traditions of monogrammed towels, shirt cuffs, and the confusion with name initials (07:12–08:17).
    • "If your name's Robert but you go by Bob ... does he get an R? Does he get a B? It’s M all the way…” – Myq Kaplan (05:59)

Odd News Stories & Comedic Takes

• Domino’s Driver Incident (09:40–10:24):
  • The crew discuss a real story where a Domino’s driver struck a customer due to a tip dispute.
    • “I wish I were the judge. I would do a Domino’s themed sentence. Well, you’ll be delivering pizzas in 30 years or less.” – Christopher (10:09)
    • “Here’s a tip.” (pun on tipping and the accident) – Myq Kaplan (10:18)
• Florida ‘Yard Dumper’ (10:38–11:55):
  • News about a woman caught vandalizing neighbors’ property with feces becomes a riff on mental health and classic pranks.
    • “You’re supposed to just do it on the porch and light it on fire. Call me old fashioned…” – Myq Kaplan (11:22)
• Debunking Florida Man Alligator “Baptism” (12:07–12:57):
  • A viral satirical story about a man baptizing an alligator at Waffle House is fact-checked.
    • “Yes, but who is Snopesing Snopes? We need to know exactly who Snopes is.” – Pat (12:49)
    • “The Snopesman.” – Myq Kaplan (12:55)

Commentary on Viral Media

• Golden Retriever on Jet Ski (12:57–14:14):
  • Hosts verify a video of a golden retriever riding a jet ski/jet pack contraption. Light joking about how such stunts are practiced and the need for dog sunscreen.

Weird Science News: Beer Sunscreen (14:22–16:18)

• Christy Lee reports that researchers are testing hops waste (from beer brewing) as a sunblock ingredient, sparking riffs on upcycling and puns mixing alcohol terms with skincare.
  • “Your IPA has an ABV and a good SPF.” – Christopher (16:09)
• Myq shares his pandemic-era conversion to daily sunscreen use, integrating a joke about the vocabulary of skincare fans:
  • “So she's really into skincare, so we don't know what to call her.” – Myq Kaplan (15:47)
• Hosts joke about sunscreen texture and the creativity of beer-based sun protection.

Myq Kaplan’s Stand-Up: Letters of the Alphabet

• The “I is for Incel” Bit (16:22–17:29):
  • Myq performs a new alphabetical joke:
    • “I is for incel. As you may know, incel is short for involuntarily celibate. And I just feel like if you're an incel, you can say the whole thing out, because what are you doing with your time?” – Myq Kaplan (16:39)
    • The bit morphs into explaining celibacy to an audience member:
      • “It's when sparks don't fly.” – Myq Kaplan (17:18)

Comedy Specials & Production Schedules

• Myq promotes his specials “Reenie” (YouTube), “Small, Dork and Handsome” (Amazon), and his Dry Bar set (YouTube/Dry Bar platform) (17:32–18:43).
  • Details the timeline from recording to release of his Dry Bar special, highlighting the long lag before content goes public.

Lighthearted Banter & Size/Loss Jokes

• Shirt Sizes & Jolliness (18:54–20:17):
  • The hosts riff on the tendency of muscular men to wear tight shirts and comedians’ changing body sizes on recorded specials.
    • “How large is your shame?” – Mike Kaplan (19:25)
    • “Who likes a mean fat guy?” – Christopher (20:17)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Changing Names (05:39):
  "Compared to what Prince did, I’m a pretty normal guy. You can still use a regular keyboard." – Myq Kaplan

• On Domino's Incident (10:09):
  "Well, you’ll be delivering pizzas in 30 years or less. Good luck to you." – Christopher

• On Beer Sunscreen (16:09):
  "Your IPA has an ABV and a good SPF." – Christopher

• On Incels (16:39):
  "I is for incel. As you may know, incel is short for involuntarily celibate. And I just feel like if you're an incel, you can say the whole thing out, because what are you doing with your time?" – Myq Kaplan

• On Fat and Niceness (20:10):
  "That's actually why he's so nice. You're supposed to be jolly is the rule." – Myq Kaplan

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Timestamps by Segment

• Myq’s name and monogram humor: 05:14–08:17
• Absurd luxury towels & Mickey Mouse anecdote: 08:17–09:40
• Domino’s driver news & tipping humor: 09:40–10:28
• Florida feces vandalism story: 10:38–11:55
• Viral alligator baptism myth: 12:07–12:57
• Golden Retriever on Jet Ski: 12:57–14:14
• Beer byproduct sunscreen discussion: 14:22–16:18
• Myq’s “Letter of the Alphabet” new bit: 16:22–17:29
• Comedy special timeline talk: 17:32–18:43
• Shirt sizes and body image riffing: 18:54–20:17

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Tone and Style

The episode is lively and spontaneous, packed with puns, banter, and the signature BOB & TOM blend of quick-witted commentary and comedic observations. Myq Kaplan blends seamlessly with the cast, bringing his cerebral, punny style to each topic.

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For New Listeners

You'll come away entertained by the playful deep-dives into topics like monograms, new (and debunked) viral news stories, and the process behind modern stand-up comedy releases. Myq Kaplan’s humor stands out, especially in stories about language and quirks of daily life, while the ensemble keeps the laughs coming with riffing and quick asides.

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Transcript

[Pat]

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[Josh]

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[Mike Kaplan]

How?

[Josh]

The clinically proven formula is powered by Colgate's hydrogen peroxide complex. It works at the molecular level to gently dissolve stains deep within the enamel where your brush can't reach. It's proof that daily routine can be remarkable. That's the science of wow. Colgate Optic White

[Christopher]

welcome back. It's another Bob and Tom extra. This is Christopher. Not only is the Bob and Tom show live every weekday morning, but every afternoon we'll give you a little extra. In case you missed anything on the big show today, comedian Mike Kaplan. He's on the way in just a minute.

[Pat]

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[Narrator]

When the shades of night are falling and you climb into your bed. There is no need for loneliness and crying. For there's always someone with you. Even in the darkest night. And though you cannot see them, I'm not lying. Teeny little dust mites, ultra tiny dust mites bout 2 million in the average bed Bunches of them dust mites munching little dust mites Snuggle warm and cozy neath your head. There are little eight legged daddy mites and mama mites and baby mites doing what a mite might like to do. You can wash the sheet or spray the mat or beat the bed with a baseball bat. But they will stay no matter what you do. It's those teeny little dust mites. Ultra tiny dust mites bout 2 million in the average bed. Bunches of them dust mites munching little dust mites snuggled warm and cozy neath your head. Well now each and every human being is shedding flakes of skin about 10,000 drift each minute by. And those dust might smack their bony lips and eat that skin like taco chips. It's a rain of mana from the sky it shows. Teeny little dust mites, ultra tiny dust mites about 2 million in the average bed. Bunches of them dust mites munching little dust mites Snuggle warm and cozy neath your head. Teeny little dust mites, ultra tiny dust mites about 2 million in the average bed. Bunches of them dust mites munching little

[Christopher]

dust mites snuggled warm and cozy neath your head. For those of you who always need something extra, well, there you go. This is Bob and Tom Extra. Joining us in the studio, comedian Mike Kaplan. You spell your name Mike M Y Q. Weirdo.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah. That's strange.

[Christopher]

Is that an actual on your birth certificate or is that a. Like a. A rebellious.

[Mike Kaplan]

I'm. I'm glad you asked. So my birth certificate says Michael. It's no secret. That's my legal name. I'm an outlaw.

[Pat]

It also says Kenya

[Mike Kaplan]

on the long form.

[Pat]

It's.

[Mike Kaplan]

Can you believe it? So when I was about 14, Prince changed his name to a symbol for reasons that we were not privy to because of the probably, you know, the contractual obligations that he was under to his record label. But at the time, to this impressionable youth. I just saw a cool artist doing a weird fun thing and I'm like, I'm not gonna go that far. So compared to What Prince did. I'm a pretty normal guy. You can still use a regular keyboard. You don't even need to get a new hieroglyphic stamp, you know? And so I was like, I'll be. I was at an artsy summer camp with some friends. I originally was like, I'm just gonna go, M Y K. I keep the K. And a friend was like, why not go full, you know, bananas, you know, go put a Q in there. I was like, I like that. I still got the mic for my. My monogrammed things. Obviously, I don't. I always wonder when. If your name's Robert, but you go by Bob, like, that's my father's name. I'm like, does he get an R? Does he get a B? I'm like, it's M all the way, but the rest of it, you can't see it coming. But yeah, then I found out a few years later, Prince had a reason for doing it for, you know, record label dispute reasons, and he changed back to Prince. And I was like, well, I'm out here alone now. You know, I'm.

[Christopher]

Can you imagine being his manager? You're going to. You're going to do what? You're gonna. You're gonna change your name to a symbol that isn't even on a keyboard.

[Mike Kaplan]

Unpronounceable.

[Christopher]

Yeah. The artist formerly known as Prince.

[Pat]

What is his real name?

[Christopher]

His name. Real name is Prince Nelson. Nelson Rogers Nelson or something.

[Pat]

Gotcha.

[Christopher]

Now, you mentioned initials.

[Mike Kaplan]

Yes.

[Christopher]

Why? Christy, I'll ask you this. No. Do you have initials on your towels?

[Christy Lee]

I do not. My husband has them on his cuffs of his shirts.

[Christopher]

Does he have his. Is the. Is his last initial the one in the middle?

[Christy Lee]

Yes. And then it's A and an R on the other side of it. Yeah.

[Christopher]

What. What's that tradition all about?

[Christy Lee]

I don't know why you have the last name.

[Christopher]

So if so, JFK would be J

[Pat]

small and a small F on the other side of the K. JKF.

[Mike Kaplan]

I'm on your side 100%. You know, it's like this as well. Do you ever look at a movie poster where it's like. Let's say it's like, you know, Keanu Reeves and Morgan Freeman, but their names are above the other. So if you don't know who they are, you're like, ah, look. Look at that. Like, you know, distinguished elder black man, Keanu Reeves.

[Christopher]

It's the cross mistake. It's the Crosby. It's the Crosby, Stills and Nash album cover. Yeah, that most famous.

[Christy Lee]

Not in order.

[Christopher]

They're not in order.

[Mike Kaplan]

Okay, well, what order are they in? Is it Crosby, Nash, and Stills, or Nash, Stills and Crosby? Nash, Crosby and Stills. There's only six possibilities. Which one is it?

[Christopher]

Well, the anal retentive hours ending, and as. As your host, I want to be stormed out.

[Pat]

I must know.

[Christopher]

I. I take. I take full responsibility.

[Mike Kaplan]

I have what you might call odc. The D is big in the middle, you know, O and the C around it.

[Christopher]

Yeah. That's our guest, Mike Kaplan. We're gonna go back to the news desk with Christy Lee. What have we missed?

[Christy Lee]

Do you have monogram towels? I'm. Do you have those?

[Christopher]

Tom just got married. Oh, yeah. You know something?

[Pat]

I. I think I have towels that just say Arnold.

[Christy Lee]

That's cool.

[Christopher]

Yeah.

[Mike Kaplan]

I love that. You don't. I. I also have things in my home that, if you ask me about them, I don't know. Like, things that I own. My girlfriend's like. I know more about that than. Than you do, so.

[Christopher]

At least the towels we have are absorbent. There was a time, going back many years I can remember, in one of the bathrooms, there was a towel you weren't allowed to use if you washed your hands.

[Mike Kaplan]

What?

[Christopher]

Yeah.

[Christy Lee]

What's the point of that?

[Mike Kaplan]

Status.

[Christopher]

It had all the absorbency of aluminum foil.

[Mike Kaplan]

Can I tell you, when I was a kid, I read a Mickey Mouse comic book, and there was a scene where Mickey goes to Minnie's house, and he goes to sit down in a chair, and. And she says, no, no, you mustn't sit in that chair. It's an antique. It's very old and delicate, and you. So you mustn't sit in it. And then she's like, and here's an antique mirror. It's like, I know it's very rare, and I mustn't look into it, you know, So I feel like that's what the towel is all about.

[Christy Lee]

There we go. A Domino's delivery driver in Missouri, as the police say, turned a routine pizza delivery into a violent encounter.

[Mike Kaplan]

Oh, boy.

[Christy Lee]

The driver allegedly using his car to strike a customer during a heated dispute over not receiving a sip.

[Christopher]

Oh.

[Christy Lee]

Mr. Zachary Walton, 36, was arrested in Fulton.

[Mike Kaplan]

You ran a guy over, facing multiple

[Christy Lee]

felony charges, including first degree assault, armed criminal action, and leaving the scene of an accident.

[Christopher]

I wish I were the judge. I would do a Domino's themed sentence. Well, you'll be delivering pizzas in 30 years or less. Good luck to you.

[Pat]

I'm on that guy's side.

[Mike Kaplan]

Here's a tip.

[Christopher]

You Run him over?

[Narrator]

Sure.

[Mike Kaplan]

I mean, people should tip.

[Christopher]

Yeah, I agree, but you don't run the guy over.

[Pat]

Well, I mean, bump. You don't want to punch him. You can get in trouble for that.

[Christopher]

So, Pat, you're saying it's okay just to ram him slightly? A little dent, a little break the femur?

[Christy Lee]

No. Here you go, Tommy. Police in Altamont Springs, Florida, have arrested a woman she's accusing of vandalizing her neighbor's properties with her. That's right. Feces.

[Christopher]

Oh.

[Christy Lee]

Residents of the Spring Oaks neighborhood told WKMG that they have discovered what appeared to be fecal matter on vehicles, mailboxes and in yards. Several residents reported finding the material near a shared food pantry in the neighborhood. Over the weekend, a detective witnessed a 50 year old woman defecating in the front yard of her home before taking her into custody.

[Christopher]

What are you looking at? At her own. At her own place?

[Mike Kaplan]

Yeah, that. That you're allowed to do. Like, you're supposed to just do it on the porch and light it on fire and like, what am I, you know? Call me old fashioned, but.

[Christopher]

Oh, man, that's rough. There's something going on mentally there.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah.

[Christopher]

Oh, there's a picture of her. She looks more or less normal.

[Pat]

It doesn't look like your classic yard dumper.

[Mike Kaplan]

This just goes to show you can't judge a book.

[Christopher]

Exactly. Oh, I think Tom might be able to sway your opinion on that one. Maybe she owns a car wash.

[Pat]

I don't know.

[Christopher]

She's throwing poop on people.

[Mike Kaplan]

She's trying to drum up business for her car wash. She's pooping like a fox.

[Christy Lee]

I see we have a story from Snopes this morning. A Florida man arrested after trying to baptize an alligator in a waffle House has been debunked. Last month, you'll recall, maybe. Social media users began circulating a purported mug shot of a wild eyed man, along with the claim that he tried using a pitcher of iced tea to perform the baptism on the reptile.

[Pat]

Very odd.

[Christopher]

By gosh, he is wild eyed and

[Christy Lee]

is in desperate need of a show. The post appeared to have been shared by Florida news outlet wfor, but fact checking site Snopes determined that the rumor originated as a satirical post from a comedic social media.

[Pat]

Yes, but who is Snopesing Snopes? We need to know exactly who Snopes is.

[Mike Kaplan]

The Snopesman.

[Christopher]

Yesterday, my son Sam was telling me he was checking out us. Did you see the photograph or the video of the golden retriever being towed? It was amazing. The golden retriever is on, like, a sea doo. Yep. And he's being towed by a guy with a hovercraft, kind of a. What would you describe the thing? It. Oh, it. It's one of those watercraft.

[Mike Kaplan]

Yeah.

[Christopher]

That come out of the water. There's a hose in the back that makes it like a jet pack.

[Christy Lee]

Oh, yeah.

[Christopher]

It's like a jetpack. Yeah. The force of the water keeps it levitating.

[Mike Kaplan]

Yeah.

[Christopher]

It's like a jet pack shooting out water. And the guy's towing. Right. So he immediately thought, this has to be fake. So we spent an hour finding out that it's, in fact, real. So if you Google golden retriever, jet ski, jet pack, the golden looked like for every bit like the golden was steering the watercraft. It was on the jet ski. It was. It was. He's a golden retriever.

[Mike Kaplan]

He's a good boy.

[Christopher]

Yeah, he's a good dude.

[Mike Kaplan]

He's a good doggy.

[Christy Lee]

How do you practice that?

[Christopher]

I think the dogs just gets on there, and he's going, this is cool. And if the dog falls in. I don't know if. I can't remember if the dog had on a life jacket, because they do make doggy life jackets. I don't think he did. I think he did, but. Yeah, check that out. It's out there. Florida.

[Mike Kaplan]

He's like the evil knievel of golden retrievers.

[Christopher]

Yes. Golden retrieval.

[Christy Lee]

I don't know if he was wearing a sunscreen, but we do have sunscreen in the news, kind of.

[Pat]

Well, tell us all about it.

[Christy Lee]

Thank you, Josh. Researchers say beer waste shows potential as a sunscreen. This is a weird story. A study analyzed the photoprotective qualities of hops waste from the brewing process. Spent hops incorporated into sunscreen cream formulations offered more sun protection than hops that hadn't gone through the brewing process.

[Christopher]

Spent hops is what I call my knees.

[Christy Lee]

But scientists say there was a time. You see, the researchers needed to validate their findings. Now, why?

[Christopher]

Yeah, who cares?

[Christy Lee]

Who cares?

[Christopher]

Well, they're trying to find something to do with all of the upcycling.

[Mike Kaplan]

Sunscreen is very important. I started wearing it just actually about five years ago during. During the pandemic lockdown phase when I wasn't going outside at all. And just after my grandmother, who worked for a dermatologist, died. So all through my life, never wore sunscreen. But Rini, my wonderful partner, she's done a lot of research into it. She's. There's going to be. This is all the truth. And also, there'll be a quick joke. You know how, like, so she very has a skin care regimen. And, like, very. You know, so she's helped me know, like, after my shower, I do this and then put these things on. And so you know how, like, if you like the. The Grateful Dead, you might be called a deadhead. You know, you might. You like metal. You're a metal head. And so she's really into skincare, so we don't know what to call her.

[Christopher]

Yeah.

[Mike Kaplan]

But, yeah, sunscreen. I wear it. I wear it every day now, even. Even when inside. Even. Because when they say.

[Christopher]

They say I should do that, but through the windows. I can't stand it. Through the walls. No, I don't like the greasy on your face.

[Christy Lee]

Yeah, well, there are. Holy. There are.

[Mike Kaplan]

There's some that aren't greasy.

[Christopher]

Yeah.

[Mike Kaplan]

Oh, y.

[Christopher]

But they're making it out of beer. Yeah.

[Mike Kaplan]

Then you.

[Christopher]

So you're. Wait a minute. I figured this out. Your IPA has an ABV and a good spf.

[Mike Kaplan]

Yes.

[Christopher]

We live in a world of letters. Thank you very much.

[Pat]

Well, and that. That leads us to Mike Kaplan's upcoming.

[Mike Kaplan]

I feel so welcome.

[Christopher]

Now you can let. You can do. Now you. You have a new piece you're working on, and each piece is centered around a letter of the Alphabet in order. I give you the option. You can do an ipa, an abv, or an SPF letter. Feel free. Which one would you like to do?

[Mike Kaplan]

Oh, absolutely. I is for incel. Now, as you may know, incel is short for involuntarily sell a bit. And I just feel like if you're an incel, you can say the whole thing out, because what are you doing with your time?

[Christopher]

You know what I mean?

[Mike Kaplan]

You've got plenty available. And I was doing this joke in New Jersey a few weeks ago, and a guy said, what is that? And I was like, oh, incel is short for involuntarily celibate. And he said, no. What is celibate? I was like, oh, you know. And he's like. Then, as if to explain it, he says, I'm an electrician. I was like, I feel like you're still allowed to know what words mean if you're an electrician. And I was. So I explained it in terms that he could understand. I'm like, it's when sparks don't fly.

[Christopher]

Very nice. Thank you very much. Sold that bit.

[Mike Kaplan]

Thank you.

[Christopher]

I enjoyed that very much.

[Mike Kaplan]

I really appreciate my favorite joke.

[Christopher]

Mike Kaplan is our guest. And once again, Mike, you're Special. You've got a few of them actually out there. The one that I mentioned earlier is on YouTube called Reenie. And the other one is where Small,

[Mike Kaplan]

dork and handsome is on Amazon. And then I also do have a dry bar half hour special that's on YouTube now as well.

[Christopher]

Excellent.

[Mike Kaplan]

Oh, I have a question for you. Yes, hang on a second.

[Christopher]

Thanks, Mike. It's a calendar question.

[Mike Kaplan]

I'm ready now.

[Christopher]

What do you remember approximately when you filmed your dry bar special?

[Mike Kaplan]

I could tell you exactly.

[Christopher]

Please do.

[Mike Kaplan]

Go ahead. Yes, I filmed it in September, early September of 2021.

[Christopher]

And then when did it air?

[Mike Kaplan]

I believe it came out exclusively on the dry bar platform. Not yet on YouTube. Only available for dry bar, you know, plus customers and such. That was in mid 2023.

[Pat]

Oh, okay, then Pat's on track.

[Christopher]

Yeah, Over a year ago, I filmed it.

[Mike Kaplan]

Oh, yes. It was absolutely, like about a year and a half for me. And then it didn't come out on YouTube until November of 2025.

[Pat]

All right, so they know what they're doing. They've got a whole release schedule.

[Mike Kaplan]

Whether or not they know what they're doing, they're doing the same thing to everybody.

[Christopher]

Pat, by the time it comes out, you're going to weigh 100 pounds less than you did. Yeah, I was bigger in that. Yeah. I mean, I'm not trying to be mean, but.

[Mike Kaplan]

No, no, you're not.

[Christopher]

You've lost a significant. I tried to be mean. There's very little effort to put into it. I hate to hear you trying to be mean.

[Mike Kaplan]

In fact, the only thing that was mean about that was you saying, I'm not trying to be mean.

[Christopher]

Yeah, you try to be. Are you a. An XL or a double xl?

[Pat]

Maybe the nice way would be, what size would you like?

[Christopher]

Yeah, yeah. Instead of.

[Pat]

You can even say, what size would you like?

[Mike Kaplan]

How large is your shame? Yeah.

[Pat]

How gross are you?

[Christopher]

He said there's this. What do you weigh, about four bills?

[Christy Lee]

If he says, I wear a medium, I will.

[Christopher]

No, no, he's. He's not a weightlifter, by the way. When are the gym guys gonna cut it out? We know you're jacked. Don't wear a medium when you're a triple xl.

[Pat]

Oh, I say, you did all that work. Show it off.

[Christopher]

Oh, no. I saw a guy bursting out of his shirt.

[Pat]

He works hard for that.

[Christopher]

Let people know anyway what size shirt he wears. He looked ridiculous. But. So anyway, my friend said, it's Emma, double xl, but he looked at me, he goes, I'm a fatty fat, fat, fat. Just see? Quoting you, Josh.

[Pat]

Yes.

[Christopher]

Yeah, but he was a very nice guy. Very helpful.

[Pat]

Can you believe he was nice and fat?

[Mike Kaplan]

I mean, that's actually why he's so nice. You're supposed to be jolly is the rule. Yeah.

[Christopher]

Who likes a mean fat guy? That's it for another Bob and Tom show. Extra. Catch us on itunes, Google play and stitcher for Bob and Tom. Extra. This is Christopher. Take care, everybody. Did you know if your windows are bare, indoor temperatures can go up 20 degrees? Turn the temperature down with blinds.com and get up to 50% off custom window treatments like solar roller shades and more during the Memorial Day mega sale. Whether you want to DIY it or have a pro handle everything, we've got you free samples, real design experts and zero pressure. Just help when you need it. This is your last chance to shop up to 50% off site wide during the Memorial Day mega [e-mail] rules and restrictions apply.