The BOB & TOM Show Extra: Cuppa, Closed Caption Porno Movies, & Worst Dates

Date: February 13, 2026
Podcast: The BOB & TOM Show Free Podcast | Cumulus Podcast Network

Overview

This episode of Bob & Tom Extra brings the signature blend of comedy, banter, and offbeat news the show is famous for. The crew dives into three main comedic and conversational threads: the peculiar priorities of some men (preferring car auctions over intimacy), the oddities of closed-captioned and described-accessible adult films, and a hilarious exchange of “worst dates” stories. Sprinkled throughout are quick-hit riffs, playful jabs, and uniquely Bob & Tom moments, making this episode a lively snapshot of their distinct comic chemistry.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Choosing Cars Over Intimacy: The Barrett-Jackson Bit

• Begins with a radio sketch lampooning a guy utterly transfixed by the Barrett-Jackson auto auction, comically preferring it over a sexual encounter.
• The hosts volley innuendo-filled remarks, drawing parallels between car jargon (“Probe,” “Ram,” “banger,” “nail”) and bedroom activities.
• Memorable Quotes:
  • “Baby, why don’t you put the brakes on what you’re watching and come to bed?” – Tom (00:35)
  • “Not now. There’s a special edition Dodge Ram up on the block.” – Christopher (00:41)
  • “Spoiler alert: You’re not getting laid tonight.” – Tom (01:55)

2. British Slang: 'Cuppa' & 'Pram'

• Short riff on why Brits say "cuppa" (for cup of tea), “pram” (for perambulator), and their tendency toward slang.
• The team amuses themselves with how “perambulator” sounds more like a medical procedure.
• Memorable Observation:
  • “Oh, those British are lazy.” – Kristi Lee (02:29)
  • “Perambulator sounds like a surgical procedure.” – Chuck (02:38)

3. Closed Captioning & Accessibility in Adult Films

• Segues into a discussion about accessibility in adult content—specifically closed captioning and ‘Described Video’ for visually impaired audiences.
• Discussion Highlights:
  • Pornhub offers described video with female narrators detailing the on-screen action.
  • The hosts recall their own comedic attempts at doing “serious” narration of risque scenes.
  • Example line from the actual described video:
    • “We cut to a POV of a guy looking at a hot teen lying on the bed on her belly.” – Chuck, reading the article (03:55)
• Comedy Spin:
  • Jokes about the logistics and absurdity of sex in a tanning bed, with fears about burning oneself.
  • “Would you ever have sex in a tanning bed?” – Bob (04:52)
  • “No, he's probably all freaked out—it’s gonna break and he’ll burn himself.” – Josh (04:56)

4. TikTok Challenges & Walmart Mischief

• Kristi Lee brings up a news item: a Florida teen arrested at Walmart during a “24-hour challenge” for TikTok, caught hiding and livestreaming.
• Hosts riff on how many Walmarts are open 24/7, and the stupidity (and legal risks) of these social media-driven stunts.
• Parallel:
  • Josh mentions similar "punishment" trends in fantasy leagues (like spending 24 hours in a Waffle House, getting time reduced for each waffle eaten).
    • “He had to sit there at a Waffle House for 24 hours; eat all his meals.” – Josh (06:15)
  • Bets escalate further: a famous story where a man had to surgically implant fake breasts due to a lost sports bet.
    • “He had to wear them for a year.” – Chuck (07:12)
    • “Get new friends.” – Kristi Lee (07:28)

5. Chocolate Bar Recall and Wordplay Transitions to Dating

• Kristi Lee provides a safety alert: recall of Spring & Mulberry mint leaf date-sweetened chocolate bars due to salmonella risk.
• Playful banter about “losing weight” via intestinal distress (dysentery).
• Smooth comedic pivot: “It's yucky. You've had a bad date, haven't you, Kristi?” – Chuck (08:39)

6. WORST DATES: Stories, Tactics, and Etiquette

A roundtable on dating disasters, Irish goodbyes, and modern dating protocols.

a) Kristi’s Comedy Club Ditch

• Kristi recounts ditching a date mid-show, escaping via the bathroom.
  • “I went to the bathroom and I just left.” – Kristi (09:03)
  • “Why didn’t you go back and say, ‘Excuse me, this isn’t working?’” – Bob (09:35)
  • “Because I’m a horrible person?” – Kristi (09:38)
• Celebrated as a masterful “Irish goodbye” (leaving without a word).

b) Josh’s Doorway Encounter

• Shares her tale of trying to cut a date short, only for her companion to lurk outside the bathroom.
  • “I open the door, and he’s standing right there—‘Everything come out okay?’” – Josh (10:15)
  • The group recoils and groans at the awkwardness.

c) Modern Safety Practices

• Kristi Lee and Josh support women notifying friends about their whereabouts on a first date.
  • “Feel as comfortable and as safe as you need to.” – Kristi Lee (11:02)

d) Background Checks & 'MyCase'

• Josh explains using “MyCase” (public criminal records) to check up on potential dates.
  • “My sisters are dating. Before the date: ‘MyCase-ing’ their dates before they go out.” – Josh (11:49)

e) Chuck’s Disastrous Double Date

• Chuck tells the story of a friend bailing mid-double date, leaving him with two women; the friend simply went home, never to be seen again.
  • “He took a train home. I was so pissed.” – Chuck (13:07)
  • “Why did he agree to go?” – Kristi Lee (13:58)
  • Suspicions about possible anxiety or boredom.

f) Mutual Letdowns & Comedy Non-Starters

• The crew laughs about dates where both parties know immediately it’s not meant to be, but simply finish the evening politely and never reconnect.
  • “Have you ever been on a date where you both go, ‘Eh, we’re not for each other?’” – Josh (14:44)

Notable Quotes & Moments (with Timestamps)

• “Spoiler alert: You’re not getting laid tonight.” – Tom (01:55)
• “Oh, those British are lazy.” – Kristi Lee (02:29)
• “We cut to a POV of a guy looking at a hot teen lying on the bed on her belly.” – Chuck (03:55, quoting described video caption)
• “No, I remember I left him at a comedy club, though. I went to the bathroom and I just left.” – Kristi (09:03)
• “He had to sit there at a Waffle House for 24 hours, eat all his meals.” – Josh (06:15)
• “He had to wear them for a year.” – Chuck (07:12, on the fake breast sports bet)
• “I am still pissed at a friend of mine from high school.” – Chuck (12:10, setting up his double date disaster)
• “You took the bread roll out, stuck your tongue in …” – Bob (14:16, extended riffing on bad date behavior)

Timestamps for Important Segments

• 00:28–01:59 – Car auction comedy bit and string of automotive double-entendres
• 02:14–02:42 – British slang and the “cuppa” discussion
• 02:46–04:52 – Closed-captioning and described video in adult films
• 05:01–06:00 – Walmart TikTok challenge and fantasy punishment bets
• 06:10–07:32 – Punishments escalate to (real) body modification stories
• 07:41–08:29 – Spring & Mulberry chocolate recall (sets up “date” puns)
• 08:39–14:55 – Worst date stories roundtable: comedy club ditch, lurking date, etiquette, mutual letdowns, double date disasters, and wrap-up on bad dates

Original Tone and Energy

The entire episode radiates the Bob & Tom vibe—irreverent, quick-witted, and unfiltered, but always with camaraderie. No major topic goes undissected without a barrage of puns, wisecracks, and the kind of teasing only old radio friends can muster. Whether discussing closed-captioned porn or the etiquette of ditching disastrous dates, the show trades in equal doses of self-deprecation and gleeful absurdity.

Summary

This Bob & Tom Extra episode delivers a comic survey of life’s little oddities—from preferring car auctions over sex, to the surreal world of accessible porn and the pitfalls of modern dating. Listeners are treated to sharp banter, relatable tales, and a cascade of comedic moments—perfectly suited for fans of unscripted, ensemble radio comedy.