
On today's Extra, Greg Warren with the Warren Report - Gators
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Christopher
Welcome back. It's another Bob and Tom extra. This is Christopher. Not only is the Bob and Tom show live every weekday morning, but every afternoon. We'll give you a little extra in case you missed anything on the big show today. Greg Warren with the Warren Report today on Gators. Coming up in just a minute.
Bob
Oh, good. Hello, Bob and Tom Show.
Tom
Oh, hey, Bob.
Greg Warren
Tom is Rick.
Chick McGee
How are you? You guys have a weird show there a little bit today. Yeah, yeah, yeah. How did you wake up Rick? It sounds way weird on this.
Greg Warren
A little bit.
Chick McGee
Okay, good, good. I forget how this bit goes a little bit. It's our way of making sure you.
Bob
Haven'T missed any special guest.
Chick McGee
This is. We usually have people like him in here. He's Italian in the studio. Nick Novicki is our guest comedian, actor. We'll talk with Nick in a second. Like, are we gonna get hooked up? There we go. There's Greg Warren on the big screen. Nick, I know you and Greg are buddies.
Bob
Oh, boy. Warren, Warren, you have gone. You've gone Nashville. You got the Opry hat on. Holy.
Greg Warren
That's right, buddy.
Chick McGee
Greg, as you know, we do have a Mr. Novicki in here. And you guys, very funny guy. You guys have both worked with Nate Bargazzi, so that's how you know each other. And Nick, I understand, used to be roommates with.
Nick Novicki
That's right. Yeah. We used to live in a one bedroom apartment, actually. Four comedians. We literally lived in a living room. We had like a sheet between us.
Chick McGee
And since this is radio, I will point out you are a small man.
Nick Novicki
Yes.
Chick McGee
How tall are you?
Nick Novicki
3 foot 10.
Chick McGee
3 foot 10.
Nick Novicki
So I had the bigger part of the living room than Nate, too, which he still is mad about.
Chick McGee
Right.
Greg Warren
Yeah.
Chick McGee
I was going to ask, when it came to beds, did you have a.
Josh Arnold
Don't.
Tom
No.
Chick McGee
I mean, I mean, clearly it would be a practical matter that you would have a smaller.
Josh Arnold
He had a love seat.
Nick Novicki
Yeah, yeah.
Chick McGee
You don't have a couch.
Nick Novicki
We both actually had cots, but I had a big, bigger cot than him.
Chick McGee
That's great. That's great. Well, we're to talk with Nick, but right now it's time for the Warren Report. Greg, have you got anything in mind today?
Greg Warren
Yeah, Tom, I wanted to do a deep dive into alligators today.
Chick McGee
Oh, wow.
Tom
Those are really. They've been around for a long time, haven't they? Great.
Greg Warren
37 million years, Josh.
Chick McGee
Now, did you see the thing last week post hurricane where the guys in his living room see this video?
Greg Warren
Yeah.
Chick McGee
This guy's in his house and he's got a flashlight. He said there's a 10 foot alligator in his living room swimming.
Greg Warren
That's.
Bob
Yeah, just hanging out. Yeah.
Tom
You got any chips?
Bob
What's wrong with you? Like you never seen alligator in your kitchen before? The hell, pal?
Chick McGee
So what, what did you find out, Greg?
Greg Warren
Man, I found a lot of interesting things. One of the more interesting things to me is alligator mothers are very nurturing. The. Yeah, they take care of their kids, unlike most reptiles. Yeah, there's a lot of deadbeat lizard moms out there smoking cigarettes in casinos. He can find his own way home. He's eight. He ain't going to make nine if he don't start fending for himself. Yeah, most. Most, I should say most moms are nurturing. 7% of baby alligators are eaten by their parents. Now, it's mostly the dads. The reason is multiple paternity. Baby alligators in a single litter can have different dads.
Tom
Oh, okay.
Greg Warren
Yeah. Which. It's a mess, guys. I don't know if you guys ever tuned in one of those alligator Maury Povich episodes, but it's. It's crazy. But it did it did you know that that show back, I think it was in the 80s. My two alligator dads, Paul Reiser, Stacy Keenan.
Bob
Oh, yeah, that's good cast.
Greg Warren
80% of baby alligators fall victim to predators. So it's a rough childhood.
Tom
Yeah.
Greg Warren
As nurturing as these mothers are, a lot of. A lot of things get to them. Birds, raccoons, snakes, bobcats, bass.
Chick McGee
What?
Greg Warren
I know. I was thinking the same thing, Tom.
Chick McGee
A bass.
Greg Warren
I know you're a baby, but if a bass gets you, maybe you weren't gonna make it in this world.
Josh Arnold
How small are they when they're born?
Greg Warren
Small. Really? They're small.
Tom
They're small and I are big bass also.
Greg Warren
Yeah, there are. And the thing is, now that I look at it, maybe I read it wrong. Maybe it's base. Maybe. Oh, maybe Bootsy Collins and John Entwistle are eating these baby alligators. I don't know.
Chick McGee
Silly.
Greg Warren
Pretty stupid, right, John? I enjoy it the way they get you. If you're big, they don't like to eat stuff. They use a death roll. Basically, if you're big, they can't consume you in one bite, so they pull you down to the bottom of the water and they just roll you around. They can't do that if their tail is immobilized. Their tail has to be at a certain flex point to be able to do the death roll. Oh, so it's pretty awful if you're caught in the water with an alligator and they start to death row you. The thing they say is Pokemon in the eyes.
Chick McGee
Yeah, I'm sure you're thinking fairly clearly.
Greg Warren
Well, Tom, you don't know who listens to this report. I mean, it's. This is good advice. Pokemon the eyes.
Nick Novicki
Just nice.
Greg Warren
Stooges Never. Never got Death roll.
Tom
No, no, they were real good at it.
Greg Warren
Yeah.
Chick McGee
When you. When you were a kid, did they have the Three Stooges playing on one of the, like, afternoon shows? We had Captain Penny, and he would always go, no, don't do that.
Tom
Oh, really?
Greg Warren
Yeah, yeah.
Chick McGee
He would always go, no, this is just. These are professional. Don't ask your buddies to pick two and hit them in the eye.
Tom
Oh, we just. They would show on Channel 11. KPLR was always the KPLR TV.
Greg Warren
Yeah.
Tom
The Sliman brothers never told us not to do that.
Greg Warren
Yeah, that was the. I know. The Slyman's appliances.
Chick McGee
What you're saying is maybe one of these is we're gonna get a letter from someone that's saying, hey, I was listening to your show and that Greg Warren guy. When I was pulled under by the gator, I knew what to do.
Tom
Yeah, you're supposed to gouge around.
Greg Warren
I'd like to think so, Tom. I'd like to sing, interestingly enough, a gator role. An alligator will sometimes death roll another alligator when they're competing for a female.
Tom
Oh.
Greg Warren
Which I would think would be confusing because, like, who's Death Row and who. Like, you know, like, I'm death rolling you, Larry. What are you talking about, Mike? I'm death rolling you.
Tom
Was that an Aretha Franklin song? Who's death rolling who?
Greg Warren
It is.
Bob
I think I was going to say who's Zoom and. But I don't think anybody would have thought. And you knew it.
Chick McGee
And. And who would think that that song actually would make sense 30 years later?
Josh Arnold
Zoom and who.
Chick McGee
Yeah, there was. There was no.
Greg Warren
Oh, with the technology.
Tom
Yeah, she.
Chick McGee
She was ahead of her time with that turd of a song.
Tom
Hey, is that.
Greg Warren
Is that a bad song?
Chick McGee
Oh, God, it stinks for her, to be honest.
Greg Warren
I enjoy it.
Bob
I think it's the name of the album Freeway of Love.
Josh Arnold
Oh, yeah.
Bob
Was on. And Freeway of Love is an amazing song.
Chick McGee
I'm driving on the freeway.
Bob
Oh, love in a new Cadillac or a pink Cadillac.
Josh Arnold
Oh, it was a new Cadillac.
Tom
That is a good one.
Chick McGee
If you can drive a freeway in there.
Tom
Boy, that lady's.
Greg Warren
You guys are pretty good. I gotta be honest, you guys, you guys gotta get, you guys put, put out some hits or something. The force of an alligator's jaws equals the weight of a small pickup truck. Wow, that's pretty tough. The muscles, when they close the jaws are insanely powerful. However, they're very, very weak. Opening their mouths.
Tom
So you can keep an alligator's mouth clamped shut with your hand.
Greg Warren
With your hand. And a lot of people do it if they're transporting them with duct tape. But a lot of times when you do duct tape the alligators jaws or you're holding him with your hands, you can hear the owl going. If I ever get my mouth working on screen, you're dead. You're a dead man.
Bob
You might have me now.
Chick McGee
The tricky part is getting down there so that you get him. You want the alligator's mouth shut before you grasp that to tape it down. You see?
Greg Warren
Yeah, it's tricky. Well, a lot of these gator hunters, they have tricks. They're like, hey man, close your mouth for a second. I want to take a picture. You look better that way. They get them.
Chick McGee
Those teeth are awful.
Tom
They're very proud.
Greg Warren
Yeah, yeah. Gator. And in my opinion, one of the top three nicknames for somebody working in a kitchen.
Tom
Oh, that is a good one. Yes.
Greg Warren
Yeah, maybe a maintenance guy too.
Chick McGee
And why do they call. Isn't there an article of clothing referred to as a gator?
Bob
It's a neck. But why keeps your mourn.
Josh Arnold
I don't know.
Chick McGee
What does that have to do with alligators? What does that have to do with alligators, Greg?
Greg Warren
Boy, I don't know.
Tom
Yeah, there's no reason you would expect that to come up or.
Chick McGee
Sure you would. See, here's the thing. If there were an article of clothing called a Josh Arnold, I would expect you to know why.
Bob
No, it's like.
Josh Arnold
And it's spelled G A I T.
Bob
E R. I see, I see. An omelet's not on the menu. Gator will make you an omelette.
Greg Warren
Yeah, there you go. There you go, Chick. That's what I'm talking about.
Bob
That's what we were talking about.
Tom
Gator will hook you up.
Bob
Sorry, what's the item of clothing called? Why Tom.
Greg Warren
Yeah. Gator making an omelet.
Bob
He will think about it.
Greg Warren
Won't you get Chick. It seems like the furnace is not working. I don't know. I can't figure it out.
Bob
Have gator take a look at it. He knows.
Chick McGee
Let me get this straight. So a gator, a male gator will take another Male gator and do a death roll.
Josh Arnold
Correct.
Greg Warren
Yeah.
Chick McGee
And now do they end up. What if they end up kind of digging it? Do they end up going out antique shopping together?
Greg Warren
Yeah, sometimes I feel kind of getting.
Chick McGee
Hook up and gator. I'm not a judge, I.
Greg Warren
No, no. They said, you know, if you're Catholic, you can eat gator on Friday.
Josh Arnold
That's right.
Tom
We talked about that not too long ago.
Josh Arnold
We did.
Chick McGee
Why is that?
Josh Arnold
It's not considered reptile.
Chick McGee
Okay.
Greg Warren
Yeah. And I gotta tell you, I've had fried alligator. It's one of the first things I had when I moved down to Texas. It's real good.
Josh Arnold
Chicken. I had fried. Didn't we have gator?
Bob
Yeah, but it was. Was yours. Breaded and deep. Deep fried. One of those deals.
Josh Arnold
Yeah.
Chick McGee
They always do that, right?
Tom
I couldn't tell if it was good.
Josh Arnold
Or what it was.
Bob
You dip it in ranch and it's amazing. Yeah, but you do the same thing with cigarette butts and it's amazing.
Chick McGee
Yeah.
Josh Arnold
I wouldn't do it.
Tom
God, I love fried cigarette butts.
Bob
Oh, man, it's so good.
Chick McGee
You'd be surprised. Nick, our guest, Nick Novicki. Are you a cook? Do you like to cook?
Nick Novicki
I like to cook, yeah.
Chick McGee
Can I ask the obvious question?
Nick Novicki
Yeah.
Chick McGee
Do you have like a little ladder or like, do you have those stilts.
Nick Novicki
That the plaster jump in?
Chick McGee
No, because it would be dangerous to have the. You're at eye level and you're detrying.
Nick Novicki
I actually had something crazy that I. When I was a kid, I have a. What I call my man patch of hair right here on my lower stomach.
Chick McGee
Yeah.
Nick Novicki
I was a kid, I was cooking pasta and I'm stepping on a step stool. I have the boiling water. The step stool comes out. It goes all over my. It goes all over. And ever since then, I have this lion mame right here. The rest of my stomach. I swear, I don't have hair anywhere except right there.
Chick McGee
Interesting. Wow.
Nick Novicki
Kind of fun.
Greg Warren
Wow.
Chick McGee
So the boiling water caused it to grow.
Nick Novicki
Yeah.
Chick McGee
I wish I'd known that when I was 17, had no pubic hair. I would have. I would have dipped my genitals in spaghetti water.
Greg Warren
Who among us has not?
Chick McGee
Our guest is comedian Greg Warren, who is doing a killer job getting ready for his new special. What is the title of the special, Greg? I forgot to ask.
Greg Warren
I don't know. I think I'll probably let Nate do that. He does a pretty good job. He named my last special.
Bob
I don't know. Tom likes to name.
Chick McGee
I'll tell you what? It's terrific. I am. I am so excited for you.
Bob
And how about Greg Warren doing stand up comedy? How about that?
Greg Warren
That's pretty good.
Tom
Yeah.
Greg Warren
Coming from a fan of the Washington football team, that's exactly right. Yeah.
Bob
I will strangle you at the testicles.
Nick Novicki
Greg Warren, the alligator role.
Greg Warren
There you go.
Chick McGee
For all you gay gators out there, it's great, Greg. I can't wait to hear the title. But I urge everyone to go see it. Now you have another about, what is it, six weeks before you have to do it? What is it, six?
Greg Warren
I think we're at six. Five or six. Yeah.
Tom
November 23rd is the date. No reason to make our audience do the math here.
Chick McGee
Just because you can't do math. I think it's.
Tom
I think most people would just rather hear November 23rd.
Chick McGee
No, you're just upset because we all know that when it comes to math, you're pathetic.
Tom
That doesn't upset me at all. I'm proudly terrible at math.
Chick McGee
Not numeral oriented.
Tom
Yeah, yeah. Plenty of machines.
Chick McGee
No, no, I said 69, not 60.
Bob
Hey, Greg, when Tom came to see you on Saturday night, did he behave himself? Was he a gentleman or did he.
Greg Warren
Oh, he was outstanding.
Bob
Yeah, yeah. That always throws me. See, that's what he.
Greg Warren
I know.
Bob
He lulls you into a false sense. Oh, this guy's normal.
Greg Warren
No, I'll tell you what, man. You get Tom off of this show. He's a delightful human being.
Bob
Yeah, he sure is.
Chick McGee
Nick. I'll be nice to you later. Yeah, but it's a killer show, Greg. I urge everyone to go. How many more gigs do you have before you record? You know? Are you working every weekend?
Greg Warren
Every weekend? More math. I don't want to throw Josh off.
Chick McGee
Okay, sorry. Okay, I'm sorry. Well, let's get to your conclusion. Let's get to your alligator conclusion, please, before Josh gets mad.
Tom
Well, no, no, I'm already mad. I wanted to hear more about gators, but you wasted half of his time talking about how many more shows I.
Chick McGee
Was talking to our guest, Nick Novicki about. Because you mentioned.
Tom
Oh, I would have enjoyed that. You weren't doing that.
Chick McGee
Yes, because I wanted to know if he was. I almost said a short order cook.
Greg Warren
That would be me, Josh.
Tom
Sorry. Great chicks ruining this. Go ahead.
Greg Warren
They're the loudest reptile in the world. Yeah.
Josh Arnold
What Loudest?
Greg Warren
Yeah, when they mate, they make. Or they're looking to mate.
Tom
When I see them walk into a movie theater, I go, here we go.
Bob
Yeah, look at this. Oh, they're Gonna tell.
Tom
I'll just ask the projections to turn it up now.
Greg Warren
Yeah. 90 decibels, Josh.
Bob
They're at 90 decibels during lovemaking is what you're saying.
Chick McGee
Wow.
Bob
Right?
Greg Warren
No, the preparing for lovemaking.
Bob
Oh, hey.
Greg Warren
Hey, baby. Get out there.
Josh Arnold
Get indicator.
Bob
Hey, it shouldn't go to.
Josh Arnold
Let's go here he.
Bob
Hey.
Greg Warren
Human. Humans max out at around 70.
Tom
Wow.
Greg Warren
Although the. The kids on the soccer team staying in my hotel in Louisville this past weekend, I think they're around 97.
Bob
Loud. Were they?
Greg Warren
This is a last interesting fact, Tom. Okay. The sex of the babies is determined by temperature.
Tom
Hmm. Wow.
Greg Warren
If the nest is warm, they are male. If the nest is cool, they are female.
Chick McGee
Interesting.
Tom
Wow.
Greg Warren
Lower than 86, you got a female. Higher than 93, you got a male. I'm not sure what happens in between.
Bob
Well, if it's cold, the penis probably shrinks up inside the gator's body.
Chick McGee
Yeah, I think it becomes a girl. That's what happens.
Tom
Yes.
Greg Warren
You know, chick. I'm not sure that's technically what happens, but it sounds logical.
Bob
You're just embarrassed that I figured this.
Greg Warren
Out before you did. I'm embarrassed that you did more research than I did.
Bob
Is that exactly right?
Tom
Greg, how many more Tuesdays until you record your special?
Chick McGee
And we're gonna hang out with your friend Nick Novicki in a matter of moments.
Greg Warren
Nick, good luck with these guys.
Nick Novicki
Thank you.
Tom
Hey, thanks for your alligator report. See you later. Wasn't that cute?
Josh Arnold
After Wild Crocodile, wasn't that fun?
Greg Warren
Professional.
Christopher
That's it for another. Another Bob and Tom Show. Extra. Catch us on itunes, Google Play, and Stitcher. For Bob and Tom. Extra, this is Christopher. Take care, everybody.
Chick McGee
Named one of the best personal finance.
Tom
Podcasts, the Stacking Benjamin show with Joe and his friends.
Chick McGee
Makes financial literacy fun. Draymond Green has a podcast. He was asking Mark Cuban why, at the beginning of 2024, Cuban sold a.
Greg Warren
Huge part of his company. He's like, did you see how much money I got?
Chick McGee
I'm sure there's a more graceful answer than that, but, dude, I bought it.
Tom
For 200 million and sold it for 6 billion. Like, what the heck?
Chick McGee
I don't think it was that much.
Tom
More graceful than that.
Chick McGee
Find out more by searching the Stacking Benjamin's podcast wherever you listen.
Podcast Information:
In this episode of B&T Extra, hosted by Christopher alongside regular hosts Bob, Tom, and Chick McGee, comedian Greg Warren joins the show to present the "Warren Report," focusing specifically on alligators. The segment blends humor with informative content about alligators, aligning with the show's signature mix of comedy, talk, news, and sports.
[00:38] The episode kicks off with friendly banter between Bob, Tom, and Chick McGee, introducing Greg Warren as a guest:
Chick McGee engages in playful teasing about the show's unusual setup for the day and introduces Nick Novicki, another guest comedian, highlighting his connection with Greg Warren through mutual friend Nate Bargazzi.
[01:42] Chick McGee: “Nick, I understand, used to be roommates with…”
The hosts share humorous anecdotes about their past living arrangements and joke about Nick’s height, adding a light-hearted atmosphere to the conversation.
Greg Warren transitions into his main segment, delving into fascinating facts about alligators:
[02:35] Greg Warren: “Yeah, Tom, I wanted to do a deep dive into alligators today.”
He begins by stating the impressive history of alligators:
[02:44] Greg Warren: “37 million years.”
Greg highlights the surprisingly nurturing nature of alligator mothers, contrasting them with the typical perception of reptiles:
[03:14] Greg Warren: “Man, I found a lot of interesting things. One of the more interesting things to me is alligator mothers are very nurturing. They take care of their kids, unlike most reptiles.”
He adds an amusing twist by joking about "deadbeat lizard moms":
[03:16] Greg Warren: “…unlike most reptiles. Yeah, there's a lot of deadbeat lizard moms out there smoking cigarettes in casinos.”
Greg discusses the survival rates of baby alligators, emphasizing the harsh realities of their early life:
[04:09] Greg Warren: “80% of baby alligators fall victim to predators. So it's a rough childhood.”
Chick McGee: “A bass.”
[05:02] Greg Warren: “A bass. I know you're a baby, but if a bass gets you, maybe you weren't gonna make it in this world.”
This exchange underscores the numerous threats baby alligators face from various predators like birds, raccoons, snakes, bobcats, and bass.
One of the most intriguing aspects Greg explores is the "death roll," a behavior exhibited by alligators:
[08:32] Greg Warren: “They use a death roll. Basically, if you're big, they can't consume you in one bite, so they pull you down to the bottom of the water and they just roll you around.”
He humorously advises listeners on what to do if caught in this scenario:
[06:09] Greg Warren: “With your hand. And a lot of people do it if they're transporting them with duct tape. But a lot of times when you do duct tape the alligators jaws or you're holding him with your hands, you can hear the owl going. If I ever get my mouth working on screen, you're dead. You're a dead man.”
Chick McGee and Tom engage in witty exchanges, relating Greg's advice to popular culture references like Pokémon eyes and the Three Stooges.
Throughout the segment, the hosts interact with guest comedian Nick Novicki, weaving in humor and personal stories:
[12:09] Nick Novicki: “I actually had something crazy that I... When I was a kid, I have this lion mane right here on my lower stomach.”
Chick McGee jokes about the mishap, creating a relatable and humorous moment for listeners.
The conversation shifts towards Greg's career in stand-up comedy and his upcoming special:
[13:07] Chick McGee: “Our guest is comedian Greg Warren, who is doing a killer job getting ready for his new special.”
Greg deflects the naming of his special to fellow comedian Nate:
[13:16] Greg Warren: “I think I'll probably let Nate do that. He does a pretty good job. He named my last special.”
The hosts express excitement and anticipation for Greg's upcoming performances, adding a promotional touch to the segment.
Greg continues to share more detailed insights about alligators, blending humor with information:
[15:37] Greg Warren: “They're the loudest reptile in the world. When they mate, they make...”
He compares their vocalizations to human decibel levels:
[15:40] Josh Arnold: “What Loudest?”
[15:42] Greg Warren: “Yeah, when they mate, they make 90 decibels, Josh.”
[15:58] Bob: “They're at 90 decibels during lovemaking is what you're saying.”
He contrasts this with human noise levels:
[16:02] Greg Warren: “Humans max out at around 70.”
This segment provides an amusing comparison while delivering factual information about alligator mating behaviors.
Greg introduces the concept of temperature-dependent sex determination in alligators:
[16:33] Greg Warren: “The sex of the babies is determined by temperature. If the nest is warm, they are male. If the nest is cool, they are female.”
He explains the specific temperature ranges:
[16:50] Greg Warren: “Lower than 86, you got a female. Higher than 93, you got a male. I'm not sure what happens in between.”
Bob humorously speculates on the biological implications:
[17:00] Bob: “Well, if it's cold, the penis probably shrinks up inside the gator's body.”
Chick McGee and Tom laugh, adding levity to the scientific explanation.
As the segment draws to a close, the hosts prepare to transition to the next guest, Nick Novicki. They express gratitude towards Greg Warren for his informative and entertaining report on alligators:
[17:31] Nick Novicki: “Thank you.”
[17:32] Tom: “Hey, thanks for your alligator report. See you later. Wasn't that cute?”
The episode concludes with Christopher signing off, reminding listeners to catch future episodes on various platforms.
Alligator Behavior: Greg Warren provided an in-depth look into alligator behavior, highlighting their nurturing maternal instincts and the survival challenges faced by their offspring.
Death Roll Mechanism: The "death roll" is a significant behavior used by alligators to subdue prey, showcasing their physical prowess.
Reproductive Insights: Temperature plays a critical role in determining the sex of alligator hatchlings, a fascinating aspect of their biology.
Humorous Interactions: The blend of humor and factual information made the segment engaging and informative, adhering to the BOB & TOM Show's comedic style.
This episode of B&T Extra successfully combines humor with educational content, offering listeners an entertaining yet informative segment on alligators. Greg Warren's "Warren Report" not only showcases his comedic talents but also provides valuable insights into the lives of these formidable reptiles. The interactions between the hosts and guest comedians add to the show's dynamic, ensuring a memorable listening experience for both regular and new audience members.